A Wolf at the Table: A Memoir of My Father

Sorry Mr. Burroughs, but when you started describing your memories as a toddler, I knew I'd made a mistake in purchasing this book. I found it to be shallow and contrived and I hate to say this, but I almost felt sorry for your father. What a whiney, dull memoir, that certainly doesn't live up to the hype.

Burroughs has written better books (such as "Running with Scissors") but this one is worth buying also. I own them all; everything he has written. The most timely section deals with quitting smoking cigs. His dark humor is put to good use! So many health woes, smoking bans and high taxes on cigs has compelled Americans to quit smoking, a once pleasurable activity. A good read for any dysfunctional family survivor, dark humor lover, smoker and non-smoker alike. 4 stars.

I bought the audio to have something to listen to in my car. Really regret this purchase. The author should never have read his own story, he is horrible at it. I'm not sure how good this story is as it's torture trying to get through his reading of it. There is a reason professionals should be hired to read a book. He reads very slow, pauses often, and when he tries to change his voice to be his mother's, yikes.

For anyone used to Burroughs' quick self-epreciating humor and looking for a laugh, this book is not for you. I had to keep checking the cover to make sure I was reading the right author. In the end, I was thankful for my own father, but a little sorry I read this book.

I bought this audio book without a second thought, as I have enjoyed all of Burroughs' other works, both in print and on CD. I was looking forward to another well-written, thoughtful, at times humorous work. I knew I was in trouble when this audio book began with a funeral-like dirge by Patti Smith. Burroughs must have gotten tips from Margret Cho's whining memoir on how to read v-e-r-y slowly and with maximum self-pity. Burroughs had an extremely disfunctional childhood and his father was cold and distant. That much is true. But Burroughs tries to imbue every mundane slight that a child can endure with such earth-shattering significance that it is difficult to take him seriously. Where his earlier works prompted compassion, this one undercut his message because of his unwarranted whining, at least in the first two CDs. Perhaps the print version is better.

I was a fan of Burroughs but I will be very careful of buying anything by him in the future.

Running with Scissors revealed most of Burroughs harrowing adolescence.
A Wolf at the Table reveals what came before he turned 12 and was turned over to a truly nutty psychiatrist with bizarre methods of 'helping' children and adults.
It is a close study of Burrough's father and Burrough's relentless attempts to get his father to 'see' him, to acknowledge him, and most of all to love him...all of which failed, including the final interaction when the father was on his deathbed.
The writing, of course, is excellent, but I feel Burrough's writes better when he uses his adult voice. His attempts to write from his perspective (and with the language) of himself as a young child felt a little studied...like he was trying just a couple of degrees too hard to make it work. My 'enjoyment' of the book improved as he grew each year older...and I also trusted his memory more, the older he grew.
While his father wasn't relentlessly physically abusive of him, the degree of emotional abuse and threat and terrorization made my heart race. I had to blink and look away: it was just too raw and harrowing. As Burroughs realized later, his father played cruel and terrifying mind games on him (and on Burrough's mother) his whole life.
A searing portrait of a very dangerous mad, from the son who lived through it, endured, prospered...but never really healed. Those kinds of scars are too deep, and the misery seeps out with the pus now and then, I'm sure.
I have nothing but admiration for Burroughs and his life's trajectory.
And he's a hell of an awesome writer.

It was an extremely powerful memoire told in a manner that was unlike anything I have read before. Admittedly it is dark, even sinister, but this is his story, his account, with his own unique perspective. He has a recognizable 'author voice' and I like that he does what he does.
I really enjoyed the work, in a weird way, (if you can say that reading about severe injustice against children is an enjoyable thing to do). It also remained very interesting throughout. There were no lulls in the narrative for me.

The events he speaks of have happened, do happen and will continue to happen. His father may not be there to argue his own case, but that is not to say it didn't happen. And anyway, he would never admit even if asked, upfront. They rarely ever do, if ever.
Some may find it hard to believe the truth behind his story, but what if he had never made a success of himself and he was telling his story to a psychologist while strung out on a concoction of drugs and suicidal? Would his story have any more gravitas, or veracity?
Let's not forget that sometimes truth is much weirder than fiction. MUCH WEIRDER. This may just be the case in question.
For me, the book was seemingly honest, sometimes absurd and, surprisingly, peppered with dry humour from time to time. A good device for giving the reader a rest, which is sometimes necessary. Mr. Burroughs knows how to pace his reader.
I hope you are reading this, because you deserve to know all this.
Well done. Look forward to more by the author
Sergiu Pobereznic (author)

This was one of my picks for the #AntiBullyReads readathon we've been having this week over on Booktube. Burroughs is one of my favorite non-fiction writers and this memoir seemed like a no-brainer for the subject.

The tears this one pulled out of me! Burroughs' words brought some of my own memories, intentionally dormant for so long, right up to the surface for me to relive. Though his descriptions weren't scene-for-scene exact to mine (obviously), much of what he shares rang very familiar to me. Even where the experiences were vastly different, I still felt for him and understood his longing to get through to and connect with his father. I could definitely relate when he describes his father as seeming two-faced, nice to the outside world, but something he clicked off once behind closed doors. I was especially touched when Burroughs talks about his "experiment": as a little boy, he walked around with a clipboard tallying up the number of times his father said "Go Away" in comparison to the number of times Augusten heard "Come Here" so he could show his father just how little time they spent together. He also talks about constructing a "fake dad" out of pillows stuffed into some of his father's old clothes, even going so far as to scent the clothes with the smell of his father -- a mixture of pine tar, Old Spice, and Eucerin lotion.

I also related to Burroughs' experiences with being teased at school. He describes being painfully shy and being teased for having soft facial features that some said made him look feminine (I was sometimes teased for having sharp, more masculine like features for a girl). He also says that he was bullied some for "being odd" but also stood up for others who were being bullied but maybe didn't know how to speak up for themselves.

I feel like I'm repeating myself a bit with all this relatable stuff, but that's largely what made it such a powerful yet painful read for me. I had to stop a number of times to get through it. For instance, when Burroughs describes how he struggled to have a social life in school -- it wasn't just the kids who steered clear of him, the parents of those children made it worse by saying, in various ways, "yeah that family is bizarre, stay away from them" rather than trying to rise above the rumors and try to get to know people for who they really were, clearly not caring or empathizing for the children who suffered from their immaturity. Burroughs finds a childhood best friend in Greg, but even Greg refuses to step foot inside Augusten's home because even Greg's parents are feeding him with "those people are weird, be careful, stay out of the house". So their friendship exists within the boundaries of school and the woods behind Augusten's house, where they play the exact same games that I and my bestie played out in the woods near where I grew up -- gathering plants and playing "apothecary shop", where they make up cures for ailments; gathering rocks and smashing them open to look for diamonds and gemstones; panning for gold in creeks and rivers; even catching pollywogs! -- those were all the same games we played! Loved that connection!

So yeah, not an easy read in the least but so moving and one I will always be glad I read, though I may not be able to pick it up again for a number of years yet -- I'll need time for the memories to blur again.

I knew of Burroughs' reputation although I've not read anything else. I came upon the audiobook of this and went with it. It was FAR beyond my expectations, and I was expecting it to be good. I attribute what I believe is a very good book to being an amazing audiobook. Burroughs purposely adds dimensions to this audiobook, it's not just a guy reading his book. The end (in cd format it was the last cd) is amazingly heartfelt as he reads his story. GET the audiobook!!

Finally, the audiobook has four songs from artists/singers that Burroughs likes and requested they write songs after having read the book. Patti Smith is one of them. Another is the band, Sea Wolf, and in my opinion this most captures the essence.
Look up "Song of the Magpie" by Sea Wolf on youtube to hear it, and google for the lyrics. I'm posting them but unsure if the store will let them stay here:

I know you are there
In the light, in the air

I know you won't leave
The dirt, or the trees

Last night I closed my eyes
And you did come to me
You stood above my bed
Tucking in the sheets

Your hands were strong and warm
And smelled like cigarettes
The kiss upon my forehead
I would not forget

I know you are there
In your books, in your chair

I know you won't leave
The windows, or the eaves

When I was young you hit me
Said I had no gift
Tounge too small and teeth too pretty
I'd never sing or lick

And so I tried my hardest
To live up to you
If I just loved you enough
You'd come to love me too

I wonder if you hurt me in your fever dream
Did you wake in some strange room
Thinking you'd fled the scene

Empty bottle dangling like a heavy stone
Having just seen your own father
In your boyhood home

I know you are there
In my bones, in my hair

I know you won't leave
The soles of my feet

If I could sing, I'd sing an endless song for you
My lily throat would tear I'd do so long for you
Magpies would take the sounds I make into their beaks
And find you in the darkness
They're my words it speaks

I forgive you (17X)

Oh how we forget!

Sellivison, Running With Scissors, and Dry were for a long time some of my favorite books and then I just forgot. I even shared an airplane with Augusten Burroughs once, I just got out of the habit of seeing what he was writing. Then, sitting at a friends house, waiting to leave for yet another airplane - I saw this gem on her shelf.

In the time it took for my friend to get ready to leave for the house, I read the book's jacket, Epilouge, and was crying. I asked if I could borrow the book and finished it on the the plane ride.

It isn't so much that I too had a bad relationship with my father. I am certainly a Daddy's girl, and I could so relate to the story. I didn't grow up in Massachusetts, nor have a mother's with a mental illness.

What I related to was being a kid full of wonder, questions, and imagination. A child that perhaps was more mature than those around me in my age group. I too am a responsible high achieving adult that lives with my own addiction daemons.

I feel in love with Burroughs's descriptions and word dance all over again while also feeling less alone than I ever have before.

Jessica Pettitt. Jessica Pettitt is the "diversity educator"; your family warned you about. Through teaching, writing, and facilitating tough conversations, she has figured out how to BE the change she wants to BE. Now it is your turn!

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I became aware of Augusten Burroughs because of the "Running with Scissors" movie (I had not read the book it was based on.) It was clear he had had a unique upbringing and the title of this book intrigued me. Augusten is one of those rare talents who can recall his childhood in incredible detail, and we, the readers, benefit from a "you-are-there-at-the-same-moment" experience. What is amazing is that Augusten had not blocked out his entire early existence, considering how horrific it must have been, based on this book. There were moments when I thought: "How could anybody treat a child like this?" (Not to mention almost all the pets in the book get the short end of the stick, as well.)

Everyone in the book is dysfunctional, except perhaps Augusten, who can actually see with clarity the realities of his parents' tragic relationship. There were so many times that I just wanted to grab him out of the house he was living in and take care of him and protect him. That's how vivid the writing is. There are also moments of sudden humor, so while you might be feeling great pain for him, you will suddenly burst out laughing as well.

I did not give the book a "five" because Augusten kept on referring to "my mother" and "my father" and "my brother" -- when he was actually talking to his immediate family members, i.e., when he was talking to his mother about his father, he would refer to him as "My father..." Perhaps he did do this in reality, but it seemed utterly bizarre and grated on my nerves. He did, although, have a strong sense that he had been adopted (which I do not think was the case), and so perhaps that's why he did that. But this is not a critique of what he wrote, it's a critique of an affectation he had that drove me nuts.

Two other points: As close as he was to his mother, near the end of the book we suddenly learn that she had had a stroke and was partially paralyzed. It seemed odd to me that this whole major event was just glossed over in a sentence. Also, at the end of the book are a series of questions about the book, questions that might be asked in a high school literature class. This seemed very strange to me and I have never seen anything like it in any book outside of perhaps a textbook.

There is a bonus at the end, though; an excerpt from his next book, "You Better Not Cry."

All in all, an intense read.

Read this book second, after reading his "Running With Scissors." It is a sequel. Where the father was largely absent in Scissors, he is the main theme in this book. Interesting approach, for a memoirist to compartmentalize themes and characters. Burrough's work is self-revealing. He has the gift of examing himself and those around him in a light that digs through the surface to the irony and excruciating absurdity that can be a daily life.

A worthy read for fans of memoirs, and anyone interested in stories of father-son relationships.

forever,
Annie

Annie Lanzillotto
author of "L is for Lion: an italian bronx butch freedom memoir" SUNY Press
and "Schistsong" BORDIGHERA Press

www.annielanzillotto.com

L Is for Lion: An Italian Bronx Butch Freedom Memoir (SUNY series in Italian/American Culture)
Schistsong (Via Folios)
Blue Pill
Carry My Coffee (Live)
Eleven Recitations

Reading Augusten Burroughs could become habit-forming. A WOLF AT THE TABLE is the second of his books I've read this week. This one is certainly much darker than RUNNING WITH SCISSORS, largely without the hilarity and humor that marked that book. It's easy to see why when one begins to understand the tragedy of the relationship - or lack of one - between Burroughs and his father, John Robison, who was an alcoholic and dangerously depressed and disturbed. And yet his father was able to function for many years as a philosophy prof at UM-Amherst, where he wore "a mask" of normality, as Burroughs came to understand many years later.

There is little here about Burroughs later life and his gay assignations and relationships - a conscious decision on the author's part, I'm sure. Because this book was meant to be all about his father - his dark silent drinking, his sudden inexplicable rages, his occasional brutality and violence toward his wife and sons. But mostly I think Burroughs was simply trying to figure it all out, perhaps to expiate the demons and understand the recurring nightmares that haunted him for decades after he left home. Judging from the structure of the book, it seems he wrote most of the book while his father was still living, but waited to finish and published it only after his father's death.

This is a sad story, perhaps even a tragic one. But I think it's a better one that RwS, written with an intense and yearning honesty, resulting I think in a kind of redemptive self-discovery for Burroughs. The last couple of chapters dealing with his father's demise and its aftermath are wrenching enough to break your heart. I hope this book did rid Burroughs of his doubts, demons and nightmares. No one deserves a childhood like the one he endured. - Tim Bazzett, author of the memoir BOOKLOVER

Considered a `prequel' to "Running With Scissors", Augusten Burroughs' "A Wolf at the Table" recounts much of his childhood but focuses mostly on his relationship with his sociopathic father. Augusten and his father have an unbeliveably strained relationship from the beginning which is further troubled by the mother who could certainly be considered mentally unstable, and a brother who mostly hides in his room and keeps to himself.

This is the third book I have read by Burroughs' and one thing that is common among them all is a complete sense of heartbreak. The dynamic between himself and his father is something that he carries with him throughout his life as he constantly tries to keep himself from becoming the one thing that he hates...his father. The fact that Augusten, his mother, his brother and really even his father survived their lives is pretty amazing after reading some of the stories presented in this book.

This book contains one of my new favorite things in a book...discussion questions or a reader's guide or whatever that particular author decides to call it. I took the time to do the questions, journal my answers and also write down a few shocking and telling observations throughout the story. While I hope to not spoil too much of the book for those of you who are interested in reading it, I do want to discuss a few things that I found the most intriguing along the way.

Much of the book is told from the perspective of a child and I find that very interesting. Is it because this was the age he was when he began to notice his fathers particular habits and actions? Is it because children tend to tell things from a brutally honest point of view and can often times see things in a totally innocent light therefore completely noticing things adults may not? I don't know, but it really adds to the chilling stories of his experiences.

I will admit that it has been a while since I read "Running With Scissors". From what I do remember about it, that book focuses on his mom and their relationship and I really remember some completely strange and bizarre things happening. With this book and the focus on his father, there are some truly disturbing events that I will get in to a little bit later (whilst trying not to spoil!).

Though this book focuses on Augusten's relationship with his father, it's inevitable that the mother and father relationship will play out as well. Their relationship is very far from perfect and those situations do not lend themselves to a normal father and son having a good relationship. It seems like their marriage is doomed from the beginning and this somehow skips their older son John Elder who I wouldn't say has a better relationship with the father, but is at least sometimes shown a little bit of affection (which is more than can be said for Augusten).

There is a point in the book where Augusten takes some of his fathers clothes and makes a sort of `scare crow' out of him, which he then snuggles with in the bed and takes naps with. This to me is an obvious solution to him for filling the void of love and affection left by his father. He tries several times throughout the book to sit in his father's lap, hold his hand, hug him...to no avail. I also have to wonder if this could have led to his homosexual tendencies...

One thing that I find really curious is Augusten's need to smell things and subsequently lick them...This comes up several times in this book as well as "You Better Not Cry" (which has a great scene involving this for those of you who might be interested in that one as well).

At some point in the book Augusten begins to identify the fact that his father is `two men - one he presented to the outside world and one, far darker, that was always there behind the face everybody else saw'. At this point the story kind of shifts because I think he has a justification for his fathers odd behavior.

There is only one time that Augusten can remember his father laughing....which is presented in the book and is really and truly disturbing. It is also telling that Augusten, for whatever reason, pronounces "Dad" like "dead" and it is so spelled throughout the book.

Augusten's feelings toward his dad do morph during the book and by the end there is a revelation...not that it really solves anything. As he discovers in all of his memoris, the past is there and it's part of who you are whether you like it or not. You can't run from it...but you don't have to become it either.

This book is both chilling and disturbing and yet I could not put it down. I needed to know what happened next, how the family was doing, if anything had been resolved. And I found myself truly hoping that his father would just let him sit on his lap for once....

This story is basically the prequel to Running With Scissors. Its the story of Augusten Burroughs living with his mother, father and brother. Unlike Running With Scissors, there are no laugh out loud moments in this book. Burroughs matter-of-factly pours his most intimate feelings and childhood quirks onto paper then publishes it for the world to read. Some reviewers were saying that it was pretty much a big fat pity party Augusten Burroughs put on for himself and that the relationship between he and his father was not that bad. I can agree with the first part but completely disagree with the latter. If the stories told throughout this book are in fact true, then my heart breaks for the child in the book who is constantly pushed away by the father he adored. The story goes through many different accounts of betrayal, hate, animal cruelty,and so on and so forth. Although I felt bad for this poor boy who did some pretty outlandish things for attention, I felt that the book kind of dragged on and on. It's about 250 pages about a man who seemed to enjoy playing mind games with his son. Its also about a boy who acts in pretty strange ways: loves his father and strives for his attention and acceptance yet fantasizes about killing him? Very back and forth. There were a couple times as I was reading this book that I thought of "A Million Little Pieces"--Was this an accurate account of true life or was the story embellished? There is nobody alive to say one way or the other.

There are few people who can convey the distorted human emotion within the intensity of insanity and all it's situations like Augusten Burroughs. The range of personal experience that he is able to communicate is broad, deep and terrifying to the uninitiated. For that matter,it is not an easy, or comfortable, read even for those amongst us who have enjoyed, treasured or laughed out loud at his previous works.
Whereas Running With Scissors, et al were astounding works of survival that, if they did not end on a particularly "happy" note, were well informed in the end by a sort of hope - albeit bruised, battered, torn up inside and in tears on the outside sort of hope... in my opinion such is not the case with A Wolf at the Table.
The final chapters provide the reader with AB, years after the abuse of commission by his father, but very much still suffering from the abuse of omission which so often complicates the lives of "survivors" and Make No Doubt that AB is a survivor. It is in fact the nature of his survival mechanisms, both healthy and NOT which are briefly touched upon in Wolf and fueled the content in Magical Thinking.
This book is a Very Challenging Read for those whose relationship with there father figure is not "hale & hearty" as they say [it caused more than one instance of the Bad Kind of personal identification with the author on the part of this reviewer] without it's final message of "survival is what you make it, however you make it" this style of writing would be an extended emotional GougeFest recommended for only the profound masochist.
Having provided those sort of run-on caveats; there are moments of sweaty palmed fear for the young Augusten and moist eyed recognition of the early demons, which are fleshed out in earlier works, sprouting around the beautiful boy.

Get a copy of Running With Scissors and see if you like his style and the nature of the story he tells; if so then this will not dissapoint as it essentially fills in a number of empty spaces in that books portrait of his father.

After reading Burroughs' laugh-til-you-cry Magical Thinking, I was unprepared for this look into the dark childhood delivered in A Wolf at the Table, in which he describes himself as "prey." Burroughs has perhaps the unmatched writing ability to develop a lonely, fear-filled childhood, into creative genius. The mother he describes was the only barrier between him and a cruel, mentally ill father, who was given to flashes of extraordinary anger and continual emotional abuse and neglect. Yet, the mother also suffered from bouts of mental collapse and was emotionally absent when she was most needed. Then there was the older brother, who had abandoned the household - and the young Augusten - early in the story, and became an unexpected tutor in an unsettling segment of the book. Those who criticized Burroughs' treatment of The Mouse in Magical Thinking will rethink (perhaps rewrite their reviews) after reading about his relationships with and love for Ernie and Grover. (His father killed both and turned a beloved third pet against him.) By leaving gaps in the narrative, his own questions unanswered and maintaining the child's voice, Burroughs injects a hard realism that the reader otherwise might question. How could one survive the absence of sustained nurturing and overt affection? The metaphorical wolf is not just the father, but the relatives on both sides of the writer's family. Without spending a lot of time on them, he gives insight into generational dysfunctional. In a telling episode his mother compares one of the dogs to her own mother. Although Burroughs displays the most anguish when he describes doing anything to get his father to touch him, to even look at him, he continued this unrequited quest into adulthood. Speaking of both his parents, he wrote, "I occupied the space physically, but none of their attention." The epilogue so brilliantly completes the book that upon finishing it, I called each beloved child to say, "Very much I love you."

Augusten Burroughs has written some funny books. Prominent among them is his autobiographical RUNNING WITH SCISSORS, about growing up with an older brother with Asperger Syndrome, a mother with mental illness who retreated from conflict, and a father who was an alcoholic. Burroughs managed to mine that potentially horrific set of circumstances for nuggets of skewed humor. In A WOLF AT THE TABLE, he gives up the struggle to find amusement there and tells it like it was. The result is gripping, depressing and at times truly scary.

The wolf is Burroughs's dad, a man who battled the demons of booze, demons that in the author's skilled treatment often come to terrifying life. The flawed patriarch abused his wife and children, forcing them all to exist within his life-despising mental morass. As a small child who had a right to expect a modicum of love from his parents, Burroughs simply learned to retreat and expect very little from Daddy --- no hugs, almost no touching, no walks, no talks, no kind words. His father, a college professor, sat and drank, demanding utmost quiet while he did so. The second son became an invalid who hid from the world. Incident after incident infused his young spirit with hopes, then dashed them.

One day Burroughs's father took him to the University, to his classroom. The boy, seeing some space on the blackboard, began to scribble. He informed Burroughs with a smile, "That was a bad idea." Burroughs became used to feeling a chill in the air when his father smiled: "there was nothing happy in that smile."

Burroughs begins the memoir with a scene in which he is being hunted by a ravening presence: "if my father caught me, he would cut my neck." The child in his pajamas races, blundering through the woods, trying to elude "the jabbing slash from his flashlight." Nightmare? Or fact? Later, we are told, he sees a telltale pine needle in his father's hair.

As time passes, Burroughs's brother becomes an increasing burden to the family, exhibiting wildly anti-social behavior and only occasionally acting in a sane way to try to help his younger sibling survive the horror. At one point, his method was to teach the boy how to shoot a rifle, telling him, "You have to be able to protect yourself because I won't be around."

So where was the mother in this family drama? Passive, mentally unstable, far too weak to combat her cold, often enraged husband, she was probably unfit to raise children, even in the happiest of circumstances. She married someone who was promising, a rising star among men, who was studying for the ministry. Not long after their wedding, the star fell. The man of God lost his faith, dropped out of his studies and began to worship the seductive satan of alcohol. He later developed psoriatic arthritis, which compounded his misery and his hatred of all things life-affirming and comforting to others. Over the long years of Burroughs's lost childhood, his father became paranoid and his mother the trembling prey for his fits of anger. At best, he was a control freak and she was his cowering lackey.

A few times she ran away, taking her confused son with her. For a little while there would be an unsettled peace, in a motel room, with the only parent who touched him and confided in him. Then she would be taken away, institutionalized, and return home in a zombie state, all the heavy tranquilizers still unable to suppress her need to scream occasionally. The deaths of two family dogs underscore the evil that roamed the house. One was ignored when it was clearly sick, and despite Burroughs's childish alerts, it died without succor. The other was finally put out of its misery after it turned savagely aggressive.

More than once, from an early age, Burroughs had fantasies of killing his father. But he could not, he realized, because his father hadn't whipped and tortured him --- "all he was guilty of was not wanting me."

No matter how "normal" one's childhood, there are moments when a child simply cannot comprehend the actions and thoughts that emanate from the grownup realm. Mistakes are made in the "best" of homes. This book chronicles one long, depressing, harrowing series of life-ruining mistakes. That its author pulled through is a small miracle of resilience. Burroughs sets up no signposts along this perilous route. He simply re-walks his childhood path, every harrowing step of the way, and we walk a few steps behind, putting our feet, often reluctantly, in his small footsteps.

A WOLF AT THE TABLE is being hailed as a masterpiece created by a remarkable talent, and all the praise is fully deserved. Though a difficult read, you will find something of yourself in it.

--- Reviewed by Barbara Bamberger Scott

I have audiobooked Running with Scissors and Dry on Burrough's erratic and hard knock life experiences. The audiobook of A Wolf At The Table for me makes me understand Running and Dry A WHOLE LOT BETTER!! Wolf was the missing piece to understand him!! I've never gone thru what this man has with this lack of love from his father but I just truly feel for him going thru that experience. Particularly with him being a young boy thru young adulthood which are crucial times for a father to play a critical role. They talk about the lacking of fathers in the black community to play a positive role in the lives of their sons and the sad impact it has on some black men (and women for that matter). It is interesting to realize that this isn't just relegated to one race but this is also one that is universal and transcends race.

I am glad for him to finally come to a point in his life, sadly at his father's deathbed to realize this is how his father is and to realize he did nothing wrong. Even when he tried his best to work hard and be sucessful in life to get his approval and love from his dad he did nothing wrong to this hurtful and bitter man. A bitter, mentally disturbed unhappy man who perhaps would have been best served to obtain some serious therapy and counseling (if he could get past his old fashioned mindset & wanted to get truly honest about himself ) for his internal issues he carried into his own adulthood and passed onto his own family!!

If this becomes a movie I would be interested in checking it out. I have major respect for Mr. Burroughs & hope his story of lacking of a true father-son love bond can perhaps help someone else out there going thru the same thing!!! God Bless you Augusten!!

What a disappointment! 'Running with Scissors' was brilliant. 'Dry' was quite good. But 'A Wolf at the Table' is really ... blah. In it the author describes his earliest memories as they relate to his immediate family, especially his father. Yes, his father was unstable and scary. And his mother suffered from mental health issues too. Certainly a young boy growing up in this environment would be frightened, sad and harbor intense childhood memories that would haunt him for the rest of his life.

But is all this so interesting that I would want to read a 200 page book on it? Well no. Most everyone has issues with their childhood, albeit Augusten Burrough's early childhood was worse than most. Later in life his father remarried and led a rather ordinary existence. I actually felt some empathy for the man. His first marriage was awful, and he suffered from severe psoriasis/psoriatic arthritis. His misery led him to do terrible things, with his son Augusten bearing the brunt. It was a sad situation all around. But the man wasn't quite the devil the author tried to portray him as.

Bottom line: a rather unnecessary memoir. Missable.

Tami Simoneti
ELA IV - Berchick
Book Review/Narrative Analysis
After exposing the troubled life of a teenage boy in Running with Scissors, Augusten Burroughs shows his strange childhood in his book A Wolf at the Table. In this book, Augusten gives us the view of a young boy seeking for the love of an alcoholic, sociopathic father while dealing with a mentally unstable mother. The book presents many episodes of John Burroughs, Augusten’s father, repeatedly rejecting his son’s love with no apparent motive. As the book continues and Augusten grows up, he realizes his father is not the person he created in his head. A Wolf at the Table gives an inside view of what a child neglected from love feels and understands what is going through; it is an interesting approach to a delicate theme.
Burroughs does an excellent job of describing his old house, where the story takes place for the most part, it makes the reader feel inside the story, as can be seeing in this paragraph, “I love living in the red house in the woods, with its black deck that surrounded on all sides by those towering pines […] And with the large sliding glass doors to the deck open, an actual wind would blow all through the house, one of my mother’s operas on the record player bleeding with the breeze” (Burroughs, 28). He also describes the characters in detail, especially his father, always portraying him in a dark aspect. Through dialogues is how is possible to perceive the characters personalities the best. An excellent example of that is when Augusten’s mother tells the story of how she met his father; by her conversation with Augusten is possible to see how John changed since they got married. Something that caught my attention is how Burroughs’
writing sounds like a kid was actually telling the story, this makes it be more realistic and connects the reader better with the main character.
Even though most people experiences do not relate to the author’s experiences, the way the book is written makes the audience connect with little Augusten, hoping they could rescue him from that unsaved household. Burroughs does not put many characters in his book, so basically all characters are deep; with an emphasis in his father and mother. Burroughs makes clear since the beginning that the audience should dislike his father, even though, that is not his opinion. One of the techniques the author uses to describe his father is figurative language; specially simile and metaphors. He does that many types when he sees his father is two different people, like he says here, “I remembered thinking how, in the light of day out in the world, my father was just like anybody's father. But as soon as I was alone with him, Dad was gone and dead was there in his place.”(Burroughs,109).
The book is chronological order with some flashbacks about the father’s life; it helps understands the father’s personality. Most of the books are episodes about John’s rage against the family and the fear Augusten felt towards him,but there is nothing that I would consider being an extreme excitement; it keeps the book in the same pace through all of it.
A Wolf at the Table is a book filled with dark thoughts of a young boy, but it still is a
pleasant book. Any person interested in suspense would love the book, it gives the reader a bit of agony not knowing what goes through the father’s mind, always creating the sense that something bad is about to happen.

Augusten Burroughs is one of those rare writers who is able to make the usually cliche slice-of-life genre immediate and highly entertaining - oftentimes, it's either one or the other; most times, it's neither. While most writers of this kind are either highly self-critical and introspective to the point of narcissism or the champions of romanticizing the bleak aspects of the human condition with anti-heroic longings and misfit pseudo-tragedy, Burrow's doesn't visit his pathology on his readers. Rather, he creates not the typical farrago of doubts by which the genre seems to abide but a cohesive tapestry of one who is fully aware of the "Odysseun" journey of one's own psycho-social evolution from inherently fractured to nicely Scotch-taped - which, according to Burroughs, is all we can really hope for. The story illuminates his abusive father and (as a result) Burroughs' own inner demons with, at once, intimacy, levity, and reasonable detachment. This produces an almost-but-not-quite omniscient narrative that demands absolutely nothing from the reader that he/she won't give willingly and, perhaps, lovingly.

Our local library had a display of books that been banned in various places and times, and "Running with Scissors" was included in the display. I didn't want to mess up the display by removing that book, so out of curiosity I went to the ssection that held his other books. The chilling cover caught my eye immediately. I too, thought it might be too emotionally difficult to read, but after one page, I read the entire book without stopping. I knew he had survived, but still, there was such an aura of cold dread written into the book, that I feared for him more with every turn of the page. The ending was heart-stopping. Reading only Augusten Burroughs humor, and even only "Running with Scissors", you don't see the complete, true miracle of his survival. "A Wolf at the Table" is unforgettable and unrelenting in the depth of both it's horror and love. This book, "Running with Scissors" and in fact all this man's writing should be required reading for parents. It is a primer on what children see and feel. If I ever see him in person, I will want to hug him tightly.

From the author of Running with Scissors: A Memoir and Dry: A Memoir, we are now gifted with another piece of the puzzle.

Oftentimes, a tragic childhood is recounted once, but this author has granted us more than one glimpse, choosing instead to offer pieces of the full picture in each book. I believe that the whole plate, served up all at once, would create such a horrific reaction from readers that we couldn't bear it.

This tale begins with the author's memories, from a very early age, but with major blanks--from ages two to about five--when he can scarcely remember much of anything about his father. But he recalls other events, showing the reader that memory was alive and functioning from an early age.

Throughout the book, the writer also describes events that feel like memories, but which he cannot completely validate. I believe that this is classic in cases of severe child abuse--in fact, at several points along the way, the author hints at additional abuse by describing feeling his father's presence hovering over him in his bedroom at night. Even at the end of the book, he does not fill in these gaps. Either the memories were never retrieved, or he is unable to verify their accuracy. Like the "memory" he keeps feeling that he had accompanied his father while he "buried a body."

This was such a chilling tale that I could not dismiss the feelings of so much more to be told. And the author's own history of substance abuse lends credence to some additional, possibly more violent abuse.

Having worked for years with victims of child abuse, I found this story "clicked" with what I have learned over the years. And while some may find the events described as "unbelievable," I had no difficulty visualizing any of the experiences he described.

He is to be applauded for his strength--to survive these experiences is truly wonderful.

Laurel-Rain Snow
Author of: Web of Tyranny, etc.

This one was much less humorous than his prior memoirs and delves into a dark portion of his life. It was well written and I could, sadly, relate. However, it's good to be aware before you read that this is no Sellevision or Running With Scissors. Go into with a different expectation.

Augusten Burroughs yet again doesn't disappoint me and this isn't even one of his better reads. He is funniest and most poignant pointing out life's folly's through his own bizarre childhood and newly sober adulthood. But in Wolf, Burrough's is not the focus. His father is.

This Wolf is a professor who is mentally absent when sober and frighteningly present while drunk. He is not a character to evoke sympathy, humor, or even base understanding. I believe this is why Wolf is the weakest (which is still better than most people's best) of Burrough's memoirs. Fortunately, he maintains the reader's interest throughout by relying on his strengths as a writer and keen observer.

Strongly recommended for Augusten fans, but if you are new to him, save Wolf for after his classic: Running with Scissors. Then go out and buy all the rest of work and read voraciously.

Augusten Burroughs relates the story of his life, living with a controlling, narcissistic alcoholic father who goes out of his way to brutalize and dehumanize his family. In the naivete of childhood, Augusten continues to seek out his father's favor, maintaining and idealized view of his father until the breaking point if finally reached.
This story could easily have become overdone and maudlin , even self serving or detached but the author avoids all of those possibilities and delivers a straight forward story that is authentic, revealing and with no sense of deception. It is disturbing to read and the emotional edge never softens. This is an intense memoir of a man who elevated himself by sheer effort and determination, to become a truly talented author. He has the ability to relate the many challenges and obstacles he has had to negotiate in a meaningful way that both warns and inspires, a modern day moralist.

We've read much about the dysfunction of Augusten Burroughs's life, starting with his 2002 memoir "Running With Scissors" in which he described the bizarre experience of living with his mother's psychiatrist during the tumult of his adolescence. Though he briefly touched upon his parents' broken marriage in that memoir, he takes a magnifying glass to it here in "A Wolf At The Table", a book centered around the severely strained and demoralizing relationship between Augusten and his father John G. Robison, a former professor of philosophy at the University of Massachusetts Amherst.

With broad beastly strokes, Burroughs paints a dark portrait of his father, an alcoholic who neglected him as well as treated him like an ultimate hindrance and burden. The problems with Burroughs's mother Margaret are revisited, her consistent escapes from the horror of their home and her constant warnings of "your father isn't safe to be around" creating an early stigma. The problems of his older brother John Elder Robison are also hinted at; Robison published his own memoir in 2007 about coping with Asperger's syndrome.

Burroughs's writes of wanting physical affection so badly from his father that he went to ridiculous measures to achieve it, all to no avail. At 6 years of age, he realizes that his father offers more affection towards the family dog Cream and in response fashions a canine get-up from construction paper. He even goes so far as to confiscate some of his father's clothes and stuffs them with towels to create a surrogate body for cuddling, his father so emotionally unavailable for even the simplest gestures of physical affection.

Augusten's blind love would soon turn to festering hatred, his wrath nursed by the death of his beloved pets due to his father's lack of compassion as well as his drunken malice. He even begins conjuring fantasies of violence and murder, one in particular where he kicks him off the edge of a high secluded cliff to his death. After a domestic dispute one fateful evening, his brother pulls him from the house in the dead of night and teaches him how to shoot a gun, telling him, "The fact is, you aren't safe in that house anymore. You have to be able to protect yourself because I won't be around."

Burroughs even describes his father's smile as "wrong" and addresses him as "Dead" instead of "Dad", a term that presages the nothingness of John's heart. John Robison's image becomes encompassingly nightmarish, made all the more sinister by the fact that he is not overtly violent; there is instead an unpredictable and calculating enmity that lurks just beneath the surface of his psoriasis-stricken shell. In the end there is no redeeming factor - while John lies emaciated and dying from complications from a past injury, he cannot (or will not) offer even one word to Augusten, utterly resigned to their estrangement. All of this torturous emotion experienced vicariously through Burroughs's story makes for a very bleak and grievous yet intensely absorbing read. It is, without a doubt, one of the best memoirs of 2008.

Bottom line: Burroughs's memoir can read like a work of fiction at times, the author such a great storyteller that one begins to doubt the validity of his accounts. With all the other strangely fascinating memoirs Burroughs has published thus far, his one work of fiction (Sellevision) pales in comparison to the painful complexities of his real life. Judging by what's happened to him so far in his now 43 years and counting, I'm sure there are still a wealth of perversely enthralling true stories he has yet to tell.

In past books written by Augusten Burroughs, we read about his dysfunctional childhood. We laughed with him and we cried with him, often wondering how he managed to survive. With A Wolf at the Table, Burroughs explores the relationship between father and son, and the extremes of love and hate. His writing is insightful and honest, not only writing about his relationship with his father, but everyone's need for love and validation. He suffered as a child, but emerged as an adult full of hope and promise.

Having read all of Burroughs' books, I thought I knew what to expect in A Wolf at the Table. Having experienced the trauma, I expected Burroughs to write in a cool, detached manor. He didn't. Burroughs used both humor and suspense to evoke tears, laughter, and horror in his readers.

A Wolf at the Table is a brutally honest story told from a child's point of view. I wanted to cry for the child, but found myself cheering for the man that emerged from the pits of hell relatively unscathed.

Obviously this isn't your prototypical Augusten Burroughs book. It's not Running With Scissors, that's for damn sure. If anything, this book is closer to his vivid (and completely accurate) descriptions of crack and alcohol withdrawal in his 2004 drunk-a-log 'Dry'.

In fact, this may be the best writing of entire his career. I'm not saying it's his best book, because it's not - or, rather his most "enjoyable" book, that is. But his frighteningly evocative portrayal of a sociopathic and alocholic father is not only successful but unexpectedly haunting as well. It had a profound affect on me while reading it, and has stuck with me since. It's a dark, dark book. The pictures painted in my mind are horrific.

My only complaint: this is not a memoir of his father. I'm not sure why he calls it that. It's a memoir of his early childhood with a focus on his relationship with his father. But that's really it.

I think people read too much into this "is it true or not" issue. I think it's made pretty clear that this book is written from the perspective of a young child, and therefor should be taken with a grain of salt. At the same time, I have no doubt that the author may have very well felt these experiences to be true. But the question of whether or not they are...whether or not the dream he had where he helped his father bury a dead body in the woods as a young boy was actually real, or whether or not his father was really chasing him in the woods...the ambiguity he places on these events is the most intriguing aspect of the book, I think. It really creates a sort of psychological horror story.

Anyways, it's a great book. Expertly written. I give it two thumbs up.

I am a dedicated reader of Augusten Burroughs. The release date of this book had been marked in my day planner, and I went straight out to buy it the day it came out. This book is probably not what you are expecting it to be. It might be better.

It is not a funny story. You might laugh out loud once or twice, but not more than that. This book is disturbing, throat-clenching, and heartbreaking. It is beautifully written, and Burroughs creates the sense within that you are floating above his little-boy body as he fights desperately for the attention of his cold and sometimes downright terrifying father. It is a difficult and, at times, painful perspective to take. It feels like the little boy you knew who was obsessed with all things shiny and becoming a star had just been putting on a show. Only now are we getting the full story.

If "Dry" was your favorite book by the author, you will love this one, as I did. But if you are looking only for the biting wit that Burroughs has come to be known for, you may find yourself disappointed. "Dry" combined the heartbreak with the absurdly funny. "Wolf" focuses on the heartbreak. I have never before been so upset by plot elements dealing with pets.

I thought it was amazing. I closed the final page and was convinced that Burroughs is even more brilliant a writer than I had previously believed. If you're anything like me, when you finish reading you will have the overwhelming urge to find him and give him the biggest hug you can muster. The intimacy created with the reader in this book is like nothing I have ever read before. Just like when a good friend tells you about something incredibly awful that happened to them, and you don't know what to say in response, this book leaves you speechless. It is like you have been trusted with the biggest secret of your life, something that is not your business to repeat to anyone else.

I highly recommend it, but not for light reading.

While I had no such childhood (or parents) as Augusten's, I can relate to and understand his desperate need for attention, affection, and approval when he was a child. As a young child, his innocent ideas of how to gain all of these things from his father are really heart-rending. When his father shoves him away when Augusten tries to hug him, the 7-year-old makes a game of it and tries to get around the interferring arms (almost as though the arms are separate from his father and it's not really his father who is pushing him away).

Another memory from the book that stands out for me after I've finished the book is when Augusten, maybe he was 7 or 8 or somewhere around there, took some old clothes from his father's closet and added some of his father's cologne and other scents familiar to his father, then stuffed the clothes into a semblance of a person. Then the child Augusten climbed into the forbidden lap of his created father and would fight not to fall asleep for fear of the consequences.

All of the questions Augusten asks his dad (which are very rarely answered), the child's hunger for not just food, but for knowledge and understanding and his place in the world (and dealing with the fear, even as a child, that he will grow up to be like his father) just made me ache.

I found nothing whiny about the details of the memories/stories told: They just felt brutally honest and told from the memory of a child: I don't know too many children who wouldn't cry or be scared when threatened, or faced with constant loss of well-loved pets or the myriad other experiences he was forced to face. The writing grabbed me and held me firm from beginning to end. I've not read a Burroughs book yet that has disappointed me.

I have read all of Mr. Burroughs previous books and have enjoyed all of them, with the exception of the ridiculous "Running with Scissors". "A Wolf at the Table" is a real departure for Burroughs and it is executed with moments of sheer brilliance. The most powerful strategy he employs in this text is his use of his childhood perspective. His phrasing and consistent childhood point of view keeps the reader edgy and reminds us of our own fears and insecurities as children. The world looks so very different from this side of adulthood. There were numerous moments where his style and insight was so precise that I had to remind myself that he was looking back on these issues, not writing them at the time they happened. Truly, that is a skill.
The epilogue of this book where Burroughs feels (but does not experience) the real intense love that a father can have for a son overpowers the reader almost as much as it overpowered him at the time he experienced it.
There is no neat resolution. One ends this memoir feeling that Burroughs has no good use for his father's memory. One cannot blame him if he doesn't. However, the book is not a nihilistic work, but a plea. If anything the perceptive reader will put this text down feeling a deep sense of responsibility. We all have obligations to those we love, and those who love us. After finishing "A Wolf at the Table", I hope that I always meet them.

If you're familiar with the works of Augusten Burroughs you're in for a surprise. Put aside your opinions about his books and go into this one with a open mind. Also, if you can, forget the hyperbole and reviews. Don't think anything. Just read.

Augusten was a sensitive child who would have done well with parents who were as emotionally together as they were brilliant, but of course that's not what he got. Instead he got a brilliant self-absorbed and sometimes psychotic mother and a brilliant but self-absorbed, alcoholic and apparently sociopathic father. Kudos to him for parlaying these deficits into his own personal growth and successful writing career. Augusten takes unparalleled emotional risks in this brief but heavy book about his relationship with his father. He is to be commended for laying himself so open in such a public venue. I found the scenes where his pets died and where he creates a psudo-loving-daddy out of his father's belongings to be particularly sad.

After reading the hype I made the mistake of expecting this to be overwhelming with horror stories, so I felt a little let down when I actually read it. But the emotions shared and stories portrayed have seeped in over the few days since I finished it, and have been percolating within me ever since. As I said before, try to forget what you've heard, and just give in to the experience.

Well he did it. Augusten Burroughs, whose finest trait as an author of narrative nonfiction was almost ridiculous objectivity, finally succumbed to moments of self-pity. But who wouldn't? I wonder if while writing The Wolf at the Table, Burroughs simply had to show that little boy the love he so desperately craved. It's not his best work, true. In my humble opinion, his best is Dry. I am a student of writing and therefore I'm always looking at the effective use of craft and while it's difficult to pinpoint in Burroughs work (other than a knack for witty and snappy turns of phrase) I will say this. His work is difficult to put down. You can't help but turn the page, find out what happened next and how he's going to tell it. And unlike other reviewers, I stopped asking myself if it was plausible early on. Who cares? He may not be literary, he may be embellishing for drama, and he may have caved to the self-involved urges of many memoirists (ironically his major distinction previously) but Burroughs knows how to tell a tale. His readers number in the millions now, but his voice is still that of a friend confiding to a friend. Bravo, Burroughs. Now let's see some fiction.

I read this book after receiving it as a recommendation similar to other books I've read. I really only got about halfway though the book when I decided to stop. The book was a fairly decent book and held my interest a lot longer than most books. It's not a bad read; it just wasn't as 'exciting' as I it was going to be based off other reviews.

It was, for the most part, easy to read and follow along. I actually seemed to read through it faster than most books. Other people have mentioned and I agree with them that the book did seem to 'skip' around in time a little. There were a few parts where I started to get confused on whether the story was in present or in the past.

This is probably one of the most disturbing books I have read in a long time. I feel so terrible for the author having to live with this obviously psychotic and disturbed father. The psychological damage to not only the author but the rest of the family was terrifying and horrific. I have to honestly say what the father did to the animals the family owned almost made this book unreadable. I am a devout animal lover and I almost got sick to my stomach when I read about them. This book is not for the faint of heart or anyone who wishes to laugh. The writing was outstanding as always from this author. I am surprised Mr. Burroughs did not suffer from severe psychological damage that followed him all his life.If I did not know better I would say his father was the devil himself.

This is one of the worst audiobooks ever. The way he dramatizes Everything from a guinea pig to walking down the street. He talks so slowly he must waste two hours more than it would take to read. I recommend only reading the book instead. The book itself might be four stars. (Does anyone else see that Everything is wrong around Augusten? HIs father, mother, brother, the sidewalk, the kids at school, the Guinea pig, the people at the ad agency, Every boyfriend, Girl One and Two, Everyone on the sidewalk, and every person he meets............) Hating his father is fine, but if "Everybody but You" is wrong ALL the time, it's just you. You're just Vile.

This book is the opposite of laughter. And, contrary to what I have seen in other reviews, this book is not uplifting. Particularly the postscript (which is in the audio book; I don't know if it is in the print book, I listened to the audio book). This book is the literary equivalent of seeing a car wreck. I mean that in a laudatory sense; I don't think the writing is bad, but the content is disturbing and I couldn't look away from the horror.

Before continuing the review below, I'd like to say that, based on this book, I think Augusten suffered a miserable childhood, whether inflicted on him by his parents or so imposed by his own demons. My heart aches for him. However ...

The more I progressed through this book the more I wanted to hear from the father. Yes, I wanted the father's point of view. There were things which didn't fit. For example, I am left with the idea that the father is simply and utterly uncaring of Augusten. But there are incongruous isolated moments when the father seems to care (playing of 'games'), albeit in a negative sense. How does that fit with the father's physche? Was the father a monster, or just a blank? I kept thinking the serial killer line of thought was going to go somewhere concrete, but no. And considering the way he was treated, I am a bit surprised that Augusten kept in touch with his father over the years. And then, not knowing Augusten anymore than what I have read in this book, I began to wonder if, could it be, that possibly Augusten is a psychopath? Whether the father be normal, uncaring, depressed, and/or psychopathic himself, could not this book be the result of looking through the eyes of an unbalanced child? If Augusten is to be believed, then he is the product of two crazies -- so maybe it's not so farfetched that he was unbalanced from the start and sent further off kilter by his upbringing. Many of the 'horrors' in this book seem to be somewhat realistic, commonplace family events that are blown out of proportion. I really want to read the father's diaries myself.

There is a lot of demonizing of the father's medical issues (arthritis and psoriasis) which seemed a bit unfair. And for some reason Augusten finds it unusal that people have two faces: one public and one for family. Who doesn't? Of course, maybe am I overly sensitive, since I think I saw in myself a reflection of the father, and my son is only 4, yet.

And how did such a miserable, psoriatic man get a second wife? What does his second wife have to say about the father's characterization in this book? And what is the brother's point of view? Does he concur with Augusten? Is the mother still alive? What is Augusten's relationship with his brother like today? There could easily be a fascinating sequel.

The audio book has some good original music.

A Wolf at the Table, Burroughs examination of his life with his mentally ill father stays with you after you've read the last page. In a sense it's almost like you're eavesdropping on a patient's psychotherapy session. Burroughs' father destroyed by his own father's violence wrecks psychological terror on his wife and youngest son. Burroughs' mother already psychologically ill tries to protect her sons, but her own short-comings make it impossible for her to give them the help she and her sons need. The very fact the author was able to examine his childhood relationship with his father is proof of an inner strength that must be admired. Expunging the ghost of his father was probably a necessary step for Burroughs. That he lets us inside and shares what must be painful memories gives us hope that it really can all turn out all right no matter where we had to begin in life.

This memoir by Augusten Burroughs is a sad maudlin merciless look at a cruel childhood that no child should have to endure. Cursed with an emotionally and mentally ailing mother who at different points in the telling of this sordid tale is either in a mental institution... running away and hiding in either a friend's house or a hotel... or under a psychiatrists orders to take two Mellaril, eight Valium, and three Elavil each day... or a mixture and combination of all the aforementioned states. When she is at home with poor Augusten she normally goes into a room by herself, closes the door, and hides behind her typewriter. Now that I've introduced any potential readers to the "good" parent, let me introduce you to the Father. The Father, a professor at the local University was a stoic alcoholic who would at times become "dangerous" to his wife, which would cause her to flee with her son and go into hiding. Perhaps the cruelest thing the "Father" would do to the son is deny the warmth, love and affection that every little boy exists for. The heavenly interaction of love and adoration that is normally pre-ordained by the almighty himself upon most any Father that is blessed with a son, is a natural two-way conduit that creates the greatest blessing that can be received on earth. In the author's family, it originally only went one way, from son to Father.

Young Augusten would wait all day for the sound of his Father coming home from work. All he wanted to do was run to him and grab him around his legs, and his greatest goal was to shimmy up his legs to his Father's upper torso, because that's where the hugs resided. Unfailingly his Father would expand his arms out preventing Augusten from getting to his promised land of embraceable love. Time after time Augusten would stand patiently by his Father as he sat in a chair and drank while either staring at a blank wall or a blank TV and no matter what the question the Father would tune him out, tell him not now, or just tell him to leave. The young boy was so starved for Fatherly affection that he secretly took a pair of his Father's pants out of his drawer, took one of his belts and one of his shirts, and stuffed them with sheets and towels and made it plump enough to look like a body. "I crawled into bed beside the body, turned on my side, and curled against it. A trace, a mere whiff of my Father's cologne clung to the shirt's fibers when I pressed my face against its chest. It was an acceptable substitute. Drowsiness overtook me like a drug. The Father body had an intoxicating effect on me, and if I had spoken, my words would have been slurred. Somehow, I understood that I must not fall asleep. That to be caught with my "STUFFED-FATHER" would get me into a different kind of trouble."

This morbid story takes you on a path that started with a young boys unflinching desire for love from his Father, but as the reader is taken further down the road, along the way the Father is involved in the death of the son' pets, and the author has dreams of pushing his Father off a cliff to his death, and among many other thoughts says: "I wanted to spit in his face. I wanted to pour gas on him and light a match." Before the reader and son's journey finishes on a loveless dead end all the scenery you see on the trip is painted in despair. If this book is ever made into a movie, it's a necessity that it should be filmed in black and white.

I just listened to the audio book. I recommend that you get it in audio because of the sound effects and the talented people who wrote the four songs dedicated to this story. The way Augusten reads his own books casts a spell that keeps you in it's grip. And if somehow your eyes are dry by the time you hear those songs....you are not fully alive. Or maybe you did not come from a dysfunctional family. I recommend all of Augustin's books but if you can only read one...let it be this one.

This book is an absolute must read for anyone in recovery from addiction who is ready to work on their family of origin issues and is brave enough to face the grief and the loss and let the feelings heal you. This book is a must read for any fatherless son or son of a dysfunctional father. There are many, many of us. This book is a must read for everyone so that they can more deeply understand what happens to the children in these families and how they sometimes rise above them. There are many, many men and women like Augustin. Not as famous, perhaps, but with stories just as chilling who have survived and survived quite well. But not without a price. And Augusten has paid the price. He has opened his wounds and by doing so, has healed himself. Thank you Augusten, for your profoundly chilling book and the inspiration of your life and your accomplishments. Yes, you are right. In my opinion, he was a sociopath. And yes, the loss was really more his than yours. A man should be so lucky as to be your father.

augusten burroughs is a brilliant writer, not in that he does what others cannot, but that he does so well what others wish they could do. in this book, augusten takes us to the relationship with his father. we've been brought into his world with his mother, her psychiatrist, his brother, his partnerships, and his alcohol, but this is the first that his father has really come to light. i didn't understand how he could manage to live with the psychiatrist and all the insanity in that home, but after reading about the dynamic with his father, the psychiatrist was understandably the lesser of the two evils.

i only wish he hadn't chose to narrate the book himself. the 2nd half was filled with much more inflection than the 1st half.

A horrible tale of a miserable childhood, told in a psychiatrist's-office-confessional style. It took me a long time to get past the author's voice and the stylization of the production, but ultimately this book was strongly affecting. If Augusten Burroughs truly lived through what he describes in this book, he is a much stronger being than most of us. I, for one, don't think I would have made it.A Wolf at the Table: A Memoir of My Father

I have read all of Augusten Burroughs' books. Because he is so brutally honest, it's easy to feel as if you know him when you read him. I've felt that way-- as he shares so much and obviously grows emotionally with each book. He had one of the most horrible childhoods imaginable, yet recounts those incidents with an acerbic sense of humor. As readers, we laugh-- but we laugh at the absurdity of the situation. The situation itself was often not quite as funny. It's almost amazing Burroughs survived many of the events he lived through. Another reviewer stated that he survived 'unscathed'. I wouldn't really agree-- I think he survived with some deep emotional scars. Yet, these scars haven't prevented him from managing to work through these issues to lead a worthwhile and loving life. Most people would be permanently damaged-- Augusten Burroughs is truly an incredible and insightful and lucky human being.

It seems as if only the other day I read Burroughs' last book, Possible Side Effects. Yet, I just discovered this book was published and immediately ordered it. I received it this afternoon and finished it this evening.

Not having read any of the reviews at all, I wasn't sure what to expect but I immediately noticed that this book was entirely different from all his previous books. This isn't humor-- this is an incredible memoir of living with a sociopathic parent. In his past books, he talks about his mother's mental illness, but glosses over his father's. If you read this, you can understand why. He had to be ready to write this. I imagine that writing this book must have been unimaginably painful. Some people would have NEVER been ready to write this. Consequently, it would have been impossible to really mention these events in other books without then devoting the entire book to the father. This book fills in the missing pieces you might have thought existed in Running with Scissors: A Memoir (which, up until now, I thought was the best memoir I've read). In that book, the mother comes off as the crazy one and the father may actually come off as the sometime victim. If you saw the movie Running With Scissors (a brilliant film wrongly marketed as a comedy), you might even feel some unwarranted sympathy for the father and only disdain for his narcissistic mother. However, there was so much more to his story and it's all here.

Augusten Burroughs never refers to his father as a sociopath, but his father fit the very definition. He was completely devoid of any empathy, any love, any concern; a hollow man and an empty shell-- yet full of rage and cruelty. Calculating, he was able to show a different face to the public and saved his mask of kindness for strangers. He was entirely unable and unwilling to show any care to his sons or his wife.

Burroughs recalls many specific events that occurred in his youth-- horribly frightening events that are almost too terrible to contemplate. I was actually going to include a few of these events here, but I decided to delete them. They have to actually be read in context to be believed.

There is one event, though, that Augusten has a memory of from when he was very young. This one includes helping his dad bury a body. It's remained with him for all these years and Burroughs admits he doesn't know if it's true or not. It FEELS true. For decades it has haunted him (and still does) and for years he'd check the internet for any unsolved murders in Amherst during that time frame. That one memory also caused him years of disturbing recurrent dreams where he'd be committing murder and hiding the body.

Finally, as an adult, he decided to find a way to confront his father-- hoping to find that the dream had no basis in reality. Burroughs presented an absurd scenario to his father hoping for the reaction any normal person would give. Instead, the response his father gave Augusten was chilling.

This book is difficult to read. It's one of the saddest stories I have read, yet it is ultimately uplifting, since Augusten presently has a happy and successful life-- and more importantly, a kind and gentle soul. This is the best memoir I've read and I highly recommend it.

Also recommended: The Sociopath Next Door

Augusten Burroughs' latest offering, A Wolf at the Table, focuses on his relationship with his father. Much of this book takes place in the time period pre-dating Burrough's now famous first memoir, Running with Scissors.

Brutal honesty and wit are just two things I've come to expect from Burroughs' writing. He goes above and beyond delivering that in this book. It also amazes me how well Burroughs conjures up his young self and tells the story through that innocent, wide-eyed lens.

In Running with Scissors, we see the troubled relationship Augusten has with his mother and how he came to live with the quirky (if not a little crazy) Finches. A Wolf at the Table fills in many of the blanks by detailing the troubled relationship Augusten has with his father from as far back as he can remember. Yet, even if you haven't read his first memoir, don't let that stop you from picking this one up. It stands well on its own.

The humor here is more subtle, for there aren't as many outrageous things going on all around Augusten. The book takes on a more somber tone as it explores a very troubled father/son relationship. My one small complaint would be that the book seemed a bit too brief. Certain things could have been fleshed out a bit more; overall, this is still a great read.

Those looking for a Dave Pelzer-worthy nightmare of parental abuse can look elsewhere. Instead, what is most horrifying about Augusten Burroughs' father is what he DIDN'T do. By virtually withholding all love and affection from his younger son, he created a hole that Burroughs in turn tried to fill with improper relationships, alcohol, and drugs.

Burroughs conveys the horror of his childhood with stark vividness, successfully portraying the emotions and desires of the child he was. A pet dog forced to live outside and refused medical care, a guinea pig left without food and water, a son denied even the barest scraps of love, until he is forced to snuggle with a "father" he has created from old clothes sprayed with aftershave.

This is truly a heartbreaking work of staggering genius, gut-wrenching in its honesty.

Augusten's earlier book "Dry" was witty, also compelling and touching in parts. I liked it much more than "Running with Scissors" as that one seemed to be told from a teen's view point.

A Wolf at the Table once again comes from a kid's perception of his father. This book was boring for me as it's told from a child's view point, with no real adult insight to temper the fantastic situations he describes. It's clear that Augusten's dad would not win any prizes for the "Dad of the year" but there have been other far more abusive father-son relationships than what the author faced. Some children live in constant fear of parental torture and even sexual abuse as reported so often in the news.

At some point this book becomes a slightly self pitying narrative, it seems Augusten is blaming most of his problems as an adult on this failed relationship with his father. Some of the terrifying scenes from the book are dreams Augusten had rather then actual events. It was just his active imagination at play as a child.

His father comes across as a sad, depressed and angry alcoholic from the book, tormented by his own shortcomings. The dark side exists in all of us really, his father seemed to give it more free rein due to his negativity. However, he probably did not mean to torture his kid, rather just shock Augusten out of his "sissyness" since he seemed so susceptible to his father's suggestions.

It would have been a much more meaningful book if Augusten had peppered it with his adult insight into the mind of father. Instead, the book ends up as a self-pitying narrative. We never really get to learn about what really drove his father's dislike of his own son. This book was also devoid of the biting humor of some of the author's other books and it was hard to keep reading on after the first few pages. I somehow plowed through it but it did not leave me with any insight at the end.

This book just made me want to say "Grow up, Augusten. Life can be harsh and not everyone gets the best childhood years." Give us a more insightful and richer book next time.

It seems like the author is running out of good material for memoirs, after a slew of books outlining his life thus far. Maybe, he should now switch to fiction.

In A Wolf at the Table, Augusten Burroughs's brutal and deeply personal new memoir, the author shares the painful details of a childhood spent with a neglectful, abusive father. As a young boy, Burroughs adores his mostly absent father, chasing him for hugs when he returns from work and pestering him with questions. All of his advances are spurned, and Burroughs quickly invents new tactics to get his father's attention. In one harrowing scene, he dresses up like a dog in the hope that he will be treated as well as the family pet. In another, he creates a stuffed version of his father to sleep with at night. Over time, the neglect turns into something more sinister. As his father descends into alcoholism, the boy Augusten is in turn intimidated, physically abused, and--perhaps most devastating of all--denied the attention and unconditional love that should be the birthright of every child.

Written in Burroughs's characteristically fluid and accessible style, this book is darker than his earlier novels; the sprinkles of humor serve merely to highlight the shadows and gloom of the rest of the book. For everyone who sensed the holes in Burroughs's first book, the bestselling Running with Scissors: A Memoir, this book helps fill in the gaps, shedding light on his mother's descent into depression and madness and explaining how he came to live with the dysfunctional family of his parents' psychiatrist at age twelve. It also illuminates the deep emotional scars Burroughs was attempting to drown with alcohol in Dry: A Memoir.

It is painful to bear witness to Burroughs's evolution from wide-eyed childhood reverence, to disaffection, and finally, to hatred of his father. What he will do with his overwhelming hatred and anger is the tension that drives the second half of the book. Burroughs's attempts to separate his own emotional character from that of his father are familiar to anyone who has grown up wondering what of their parents they will inherit. But in this tale, Burroughs triumphs over the neglect of his father--and the failure of his mother to protect him--to grow from a compassionate, loving boy into a caring, successful adult. Ultimately, this is a tale of hope which shows that the chain of abuse and neglect need not link generation to generation. It is also a reminder to those blessed with loving parents to be thankful for their good fortune, and an admonition for all of us with children to hug them just a little bit tighter, and listen just a little bit harder, the next time they greet us with joy when we get home from work.