Use an FBI Profiler's Tactics to Avoid Unsafe Situations

The author is apparently a narcissist by all means. The whole book smells like that all your ordinary people are stupid and she is the very God that can save you. I don't know how she manages to enjoy such a tired life so many years. Like the cruise example in chapter 10, her suggestions about all those questions to ask the trip organizer, i.e. the lady in the church, reflect extreme self-center personality and lack of social skills. They don't even care whether she would go or not, just being polite to inform her, and she treated really seriously and asked questions like questioning a criminal.

In reading the cover, this book appears to be something it is NOT. By the time I was through the first tow chapters I wanted to stab myself in the eye so I wouldn't have to continue reading it! I will NEVER purchase anything by O'Toole again! Major Yawn fest!

This book is, first and foremost, very poorly written. I found myself struggling through a morass of very bad grammar and amateurish writing. This did not produce confidence in the author's competence.

The author repeats herself throughout the book. It's annoying.

The advice she gives for checking people out is absurd. I laughed when she advised asking contractors if they had a criminal history. That's a great way to make sure no one ever works for you, as most people would be horribly offended by that question. Also, I cannot see anyone taking her advice and asking someone at the beginning of a relationship to describe difficulties they'd had in the past and how they resolved them. Anyone would think you were a nutjob if you did that.

It would be great if we could check out a person's background thoroughly, as she advises, but the average citizen simply doesn't have the tools to do that. Aside from some obvious common sense suggestions and some totally hokey acronyms to laugh at, the author gives the reader nothing.

Dangerous Instincts

Mary Ellen O’Toole Ph.D. worked on many high-profile cases during her career with the FBI. She teaches at the FBI National Academy, lectures at the Smithsonian, and frequently speaks to various groups. Alisa Bowman is a professional writer and collaborator. What most people do the judge other people and situations isn’t always safe. You can’t judge by looks. [Or demeanor?] This 257 page book has eleven chapters, an ‘Introduction’, ‘Appendix’, ‘Notes’, and ‘Index’. There are no photographs or charts. I don’t know how appropriate this is to people who live in small rural towns where most people know about other people and hitchhiking is/was common. But things have changed since Nixon was President. This is an interesting book, but parts seem repetitive. Does the time spent watching television result in “dumbing down” Americans? Is 28 hours a week too much? This book would be better with a five page summary. How many will read and remember all these stories and advice from 240 pages? I offer a shorter list from my own limited experiences.

* “Beware of friendly well-dressed strangers who try to sell you something” is still good advice. Talking to a stranger in a public place is OK as long as you never give out personal information.
* Beware of a stranger who wants to do you a favor or asks for help. Your answer should not be rude but should be no. If you’ve seen this person before in the same public place it could be a set-up or a stalker.
* Beware of anyone who boasts about doing something even if its not illegal. They may be trying to get you to boast and make up a story that can be held against you. Who else is listening?
* Beware of someone at work who makes insulting remarks about one of your managers. Don’t even laugh or even smile, this could be an attempt to get you into trouble.

* Beware of any unexpected visitor who wants to enter your home, even if their reason sounds legitimate. If you do, be sure to lock your door so anyone else can’t walk in while you’re distracted. Locked doors day and night mean never having to say you’re sorry.
* Hiring people to work in your home is best done with someone you’ve used before (or who was recommended by a friend or relative). Payment by check should be at the completion of the work. Established businesses have a line of credit so you don’t have to pay for supplies. If this person works part-time and wants to be paid in cash be sure to get a receipt. A written estimate is best as it defines what work will be done. [Watch those legal shows on TV.]
* The above may not be needed when dealing with a long established business. The best business is one you have dealt with before.

* I would never recommend meeting someone via the Internet. The Internet has sources where you can check on any name. You may be surprised to learn things about relatives or friends that they will never tell you! What if you meet a friendly stranger but can’t find any references to their name? That is not a good sign. Is the name valid? The movie “The Net” warns about the danger of posting personal information on the Internet. If you can’t find a local friend (there are dangers in this too) your expectations may be unrealistic. True Crime stories tell about the problem of meeting a stranger who sounds “too good to be true”.

I am a worrier and this book didn't help that a bit but it was certainly interesting never the less! While I agree that the writing is EXTREMELY simplistic and elementary there were still some little known facts of famous cases included (like Gary Ridgeway some other serial killers)and some good common sense tips. People interested in personality profiles and those looking for mates and those involved with internet relationships can really glean some good information here. Yes, always lock your doors, don't hitchhike, and don't post anything online you wouldn't put on a bill board down the street. I feel like if you are someone who is suspicious by nature now will really feel some anxiety after reading this book. You start to wonder if the pizza guy is going to axe murder you. But overall, I enjoyed the book and read it straight through and feel Ms. O'Toole really knows her stuff. Lastly, I really sympathize for the person who wrote about her murdered daughter on here (I think by Derek Todd Lee) but feel this one star had nothing to do with the actual book itself.

Although my depth of experience and knowledge is perhaps 1/100,000th of Dr. O'Toole's, I was immediately drawn to this book when I saw it in the library because I have had a surprising number of personal experiences that fit right in with what she talks about. I am glad to see quite a few people are reading and reviewing the book. A basic fact of life is that we will all die. (I am 69 years old, an atheist, still in relative good health, though aware of my body breaking down and that I might live another ten years [as my doctor optimistically forecasts] or that I might die in the next ten seconds. I have had at least three mini-strokes and my father died of his second heart attack at the age of 43. Even though we are all in danger at any time, from illness, from automobile accident, from storms, we can't go through life in constant terror and anxiety. But just as we drive at 70 miles an hour (forgetting how easily we can be smashed) or fly in an airplane at hundreds of miles an hour miles an hour thousands of feet above the earth, it makes sense to try and steer a sensible path between constant terror and anxiety on the one hand and careless indifference to safety on the other hand. In a car, we fasten our seat belt, avoid alcohol, and stop if tired. I live in a peaceful area full of old retired "love and peace hippies," and optimistic religious believers, and they tend to believe that they are safe from crime because they don't live a "high-crime area" big city. Even on our peaceful island, we have criminals, meth dealers, and at the moment four murder trials wending their way through our courts. So, don't be terrified of people all the time, but follow the sensible precautions provided in this book.

Perhaps it is just me but I have experienced quite a few close to death experiences. I will skip over the medical ones, the hunting ones, the automobile crashes, the industrial accident, as they have nothing to do with the topics in the book. Even so, an aunt was murdered in Los Angeles in the 1950s. (Killer never caught; probably a burglar who surprised her.) I once took a pistol out of the hand of an elderly white man who was pointing it at a 12-year-old black boy the man thought was about to mug him. I once was the only adult in a dark parking lot trying to calm down 50 angry white adolescents and 50 angry black adolescents carrying weapons and seconds from getting into a mini-race-riot. (Seattle.) As a (for a while) high school teacher (Oregon), one of my former students after graduation murdered her husband a few years after graduation. (I had suspected she was a psychopath when I knew her as a student, but I was surprised when she was arrested and convicted of murder.) I worked closely with a mentally ill man who acted like he was going to go on a workplace rampage, but then didn't. My wife and I ended up (very long, complicated story) as unintentional bounty hunters who ended up stopping a non-violent psychopath cult-leader/swindler who had stolen about a million dollars over 20 years. My wife and I operated a small service business for five years and were swindled several times by people who seemed perfectly honest and trustworthy. So Dr. O'Toole's experiences and advice about the untrustworthiness of our intuition and gut instincts strikes me as quite accurate and appropriate. For that matter, many years ago, one of my sisters was abducted, raped and impregnated, by a serial sex offender who was quite trusted by my father and mother. To my horror, I realized that about seven years before my sister's experience,* I had come in contact with the man and a young woman he was holding in captivity. (As I was only 14 years old at the time, I completely failed to recognize that her anxious behavior was the terror of a captive, and didn't realize it until years later.) On another occasion, (another long story) we provided refuge to a woman who as being beaten by a criminal neighbor. While we were waiting for AID car and police to arrive, the perp approached our house with a knife and slashed a stopped Good Samaritan in the face. (Fortunately, victims not seriously injured.)

Well, enough about me and my almost non-existent qualifications to review this book. My main point is that there are bad people who prey on good people such as you reading this review. Some other reviews have some criticisms and quibbles about about the style and content of the book (and these criticisms may have some merit). To me, the virtues and usefulness of the book far outweigh what flaws it may have, and I suggest you read it carefully, use your own intelligence, judgement, and experience as appropriate, and use what you can to make yourself safer without frightening yourself to death.

*I am editing this review (revision added 11/7/13) to make a point consistent with the author's points. Everyone's judgment is imperfect and subject to flaws, such as having flawed memory or jumping to conclusions with imperfect information. Dr. O'Toole's examples are mostly about not being cautious enough, but errors can take one in the wrong direction as well. I provided an example of my sister being held captive and raped by an older man. (I knew that an older man had made her pregnant, but over the years I came to the conclusion that the relationship had been an unwilling one, in part because I had been too much influenced by sensational news reports and bad situations I had observed when I was a high school teacher. I had been reluctant to ask my sister about the situation because we are not in frequent communication and not particularly close (though our relationship is amicable). I finally forced myself to ask her what had happened and she explained that the relationship (while immature and not resulting in marriage) had been a voluntary one and that the father had provided child support. So what I said earlier in my review was not correct. (As far as I know, my other examples are correct.)

My main point, however laboriously expressed, is that it is very easy to come to incorrect conclusions about other people and that Dr. O'Toole's book provides excellent tips and tools to help avoid what may be very dangerous errors.

I, like another reviewer, saw the direct contrast of Mary Ellen O'Toole's premise that you can't trust your instincts with the premise of the excellent Gift Of Fear by Gavin De Becker, a much better written book, in my opinion. Mary Ellen O'Toole would like everyone to use a completely cerebral approach to evaluating other peoples' trustworthiness. There is a lot of value in what she says. But no one can keep list after list of rules in their head while dealing with people. One can only try to stay aware of what is going on during interactions, combining instinct with intellect. Hopefully instinct and intellect both improve with age, honed by memories of what went wrong in one's own life, learning from other people's experiences, etc. I found her stories interesting, her interviewing techniques useful, her lists and hints that all would be explained in the next chapter wearisome. (The Bill Clinton quote is wrong by the way.)

This book is really eye-opening. It's only a 1 in 8 million chance that a serial killer will come to your door, but clearly the chance you will meet, date, or work with a criminal or dangerous person is much higher than that. I don't really worry about being hacked into pieces or locked in a basement dungeon, but I think we all know someone who has been attacked, swindled, physically or emotionally abused, etc. because they or someone else didn't see the warning signs.

I've certainly let strangers in my house on the basis of a uniform or a friendly voice, and I usually put a lot of trust in my first impression when meeting someone. But this book shows you a lot of simple things you can do that will give you insight into what's really going on. I'm pretty easy-going and certainly won't use all the advice the authors give, but there's a lot of useful stuff in there. And just in case Ted Bundy shows up at my door, I'm a little more prepared!

I think it is within us to want to assume the best about the people we meet and the encounters we navigate in life, sadly that is not a world we currently inhabit. Alot of the material covered in this book are things taught to me while i was in the US Marines yet is suitably for everyone. Dr. O'Toole kindly shares her insight after a long and successful career as an FBI profiler. This easy read will not grace you with the talents of being able to expertly guess what kind of character a person is, but it will open the readers mind to help keep them and their loved ones more properly protected. Even just skimming the reviews at the end of each chapter will be beneficial to the reader who does not want to commit to purchasing this book. I thoroughly enjoyed when the author would tie in personal stories that were relevant to the topic being discussed. In an uncertain world, a fantastic way to protect our selves is to arm ourselves with information.

This book makes one valid point: you cannot trust your instincts or normal assumptions about people when you deal with psychopaths. Unfortunately, that is also where the insight ends. The author provides countless war stories about how trusting your instincts can lead you astray, and about her successes as an FBI agent dealing with psychopaths. But the book doesn't teach you anything. When I finished the book, I didn't know anything about profiling and analyzing people that I didn't know when I started reading it. It is a magnificent waste of time.

As a retired police officer, I found this book to contain alot of excellent advice for the average person, who in my experience, is usually far too trusting and naiive. Not that I am perfect myself. In spite of my knowledge and experience, I have let my guard down and put myself in potentially dangerous situations. This book is a great reminder of how vulnerable we all can be, and of what horrors really do go on in the world.
The opening chapter grips you with an account of a sexual sadist who was featured on an epsiode of Law and Order. I remember the episode well. It was one of the most disturbing ones I ever watched. Knowing it really happened, and how the monster appeared so "normal" on the surface, is terrifying.
I am a firm believer that none of us really every "know" anyone, in the purest form of the word, other than ourselves. The book emphasizes how the most dangerous people are usually the most normal, friendly and harmless.
The downside is that I think most people will continue to think "It will never happen to me". I found as an officer, and as a mother, that people just don't want to be told anything. They know better, especially today with the younger set. So how many people will do more to protect themselves after reading this book is anyone's guess.
I noticed that one reviewer commented on the author's tooting her own horn about her work and ability. I saw a bit of this but can easily forgive it. Thank God there are people who can do her work and sit down face to face with the Devil. I couldnt which is one of the reasons I retired early.
I commend her for her work, and for writing this book. I am sending it to my daughter next. Maybe she will listen to Mary Ellen since she wouldn't listen to her cop mom all that much...lol

While the subject matter is fascinating, and everyone should have some idea of the psychopathic tendencies of a very small (thank goodness) percentage of people, I felt that the author could have finished all her points in half the verbiage it took her. There were many repeated refrains, especially about how you can't tell by looking at a person whether they're dangerous or not. I'm halfway through the book, and I will bet she mentioned this at least 15 times.

I don't mean to downplay the value or interest of this material; I just meant that this could have been a really splendid book, and it's just so-so because of the simplistic and repetitive writing. I have gotten some good tips.

This would be a great book for teenagers, as, in fact, the repetition could be valuable to young people who have not yet developed a healthy sense of caution when it comes to dealing with others.

Interesting material, that's for sure!

I do not believe the author made a convincing case for her thesis, How Gut Feelings Betray Us. I think we are left with an interesting book that ends about where we began - using our intuition and gut feelings in combination with a conscious focus on the facts of any given situation.

In this thought-provoking book, a retired FBI special agent challenges the notion that people can rely on their gut feelings, intuitions, or emotional reactions to effectively assess other people, recognize dangerous situations, and enhance their personal safety. The author uses her experience as a behavioral analyst ("profiler") to discuss, analyze, and describe how many people are not very good at doing the following: (1) accurately gauging the personality and character of other people; (2) predicting or anticipating how people will behave; (3) observing pertinent details or understanding their significance; (4) being effective in asking questions and eliciting relevant answers; (5) making good risk assessments; (6) engaging in sound decision-making; and (7) taking effective steps to enhance their personal safety. The author also makes recommendations on how people can improve their ability to undertake those actions effectively.

The author illustrates her observations, arguments, and recommendations with examples from various criminal cases, including such notorious ones as Gary Leon Ridgway (Green River Killer), Ted Bundy (serial killer), Dennis Raeder (BTK Killer), Charles Whitman (University of Texas clock tower shooter), Edmund Emil Kemper (serial killer), Derrick Todd Lee (Baton Rouge Serial Killer), and Kevin Coe (South Hill Rapist). The author's references to various criminal cases (whether notorious or not notorious) are made to support her observations, arguments, and recommendations, not to provide a systematic study or review of the criminal cases themselves.

This book is written for the general public, and does not require the reader to have any training or experience in law enforcement, security, psychology, behavioral analysis, or risk assessment. Anyone looking for technical or detailed discussions of serial criminals, behavioral analysis, interviewing or interrogation, risk assessment, and personal safety should look for other books.

This is a fairly readable, worthwhile book about serious topics that can affect all people at various times during the course of their lives. The author's observations, arguments, and recommendations are thoughtful and worth considering, even if the reader does not find all of them persuasive.

A brilliant, important work that I wish had been around 25 years ago for me to read. "Trust your gut. Trust your intuition," people say. This is precisely what Dr. O'Toole cautions us against. An incredibly valuable lesson from an amazing, compassionate woman with an unparalleled combination of experience, judgment, intelligence, and wisdom.

We spend so much time worrying about "dangers out there," that are often beyond our control, that we don't realize that there is a lot that we CAN control.

Some people think that having a gun or a dog or knowing martial arts will protect them, but not getting into dangerous situations in the first place is much more effective.

Fortunately, Dr. O'Toole gives us the tools to strengthen and improve our inborn danger detectors. How NOT to send the verbal or behavioral clues that identify us as potential victims. How human predators are experts at manipulation, and what we can do to stop, avoid or prevent manipulation.

It is so empowering to know that we can control our personal boundaries and that we can LEARN to set them and show our boundaries to the world so that would-be predators are less likely to get the chance to violate them. Predators are more likely to go after easy victims. With the knowledge that Dr. O'Toole has shared through her long experience, I feel and am more safe.

I liked this book and the way the profiler said things simple and straight forward. My sister lives in Brown County Indiana. A serial killer came to her door,some years ago,trying to sell childrens religious books. Thank GOD she kept the door locked and did not answer. He eventually left after several minutes trying to get someone to answer the door.She was home alone with two little girls and a little boy. The TV was on the next day and news reported that some fifty miles away a fellow had picked up a woman, with two children, who had car trouble. He killed them and was later arrested for the crime. They showed his picture and it was the man who had came to my sisters house the day before. She never called about the incident, as she had no information to give. (I thought she should call just in case he hurt someone in the area.)Buy the book please!!

The author has taken a complicated topic and presented it as more simplistic than it really is in reality. If you take the premise of this book and synthesize it with Gavin deBecker's book "The Gift of Fear" there would be a more expanded context to understand the complexity of human behavior. Being safe is not a "this or that" and neither is the ability to make good decisions about people. Rather, it is a process that combines learning to develop and trust your intuition, apply your knowledge and experience and then practice these skills in our every day lives. I depend up on my intuition, mind and brain to guide me. The bottom line is that we are never 100% sure of anybody and adults who ought to know better will still make errors in judgment. It is a good read and an interesting topic. I do want to thank the author for the thought that went into the book and bringing her experience to the reader.

I enjoyed this book, and I think it's worth reading for two related reasons.

The first, and one that some other commentators seem to overlook, is just the unique access the reader gets to the accumulated experiences of an FBI profiler. This book is punctuated by anecdotes from the author's experience at the FBI - in other words, "teachable moments." And while the author certainly uses their didactic value, this shouldn't cloud the fact that they are fascinating in their own right. For instance, the book relates the author's experiences interviewing Gary Ridgway, the Green River killer.

The second reason is because the advice is thought-provoking and valuable. The lessons and experiences are connected directly to actions that you can take, if you want, to be safer in your interactions with the world around you.

Interesting and actionable - a great read.

I have read numerous books written by former FBI profilers. Invariably, they have fallen into two categories. The writer tends to focus either upon success stories from his or her experience as a profiler, or the trauma to the victims of the heinous acts he or she investigated. I group them accordingly as either War Story Tellers or Victim's Rights Advocates.

I found it refreshing the authors of Dangerous Instincts did neither. Instead of telling countless, albeit interesting, stories from her years in the FBI, or focusing on the victims of the violent crimes she investigated, O'Toole focuses on you, the reader, and how you can do your best to stay safe and not become a crime victim. Instead of becoming self-absorbed, O'Toole focuses on those victims who are not yet victims and who, with a bit a thought and planning, can stay safe. O'Toole offers enough anecdotes from her career to establish her credibility. She uses these anecdotes to validate her familiarity with victims of violent crime, living and dead. Then she uses her knowledge and experience to teach readers to take control of their lives, not by living as fearful hermits, but by making decisions backed by education, research, and planning.

I can think of no better paean for the lonely, destitute victims O'Toole came to know in her career than a book written to empower men and women to live their lives safely and fully.

I have not finished the book yet, but what I have read is great. Can't wait to find the time to finish it. I would recommend This book to anyone especially single women. Mary Ellen O'Toole has a great insight into the human mind that most of us do not. If you are out there just relying on your gut instincts to get you through, you must read this book.

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This book is truly a wealth of information. I am simply a single mother with no background in law enforcement. I have some level of interest in crime and serial killers when they present themselves in the news, yes, but not on the level some of these "responders" to this book seem to have. (I'm wondering if some of these reviews are of a personal nature by those envious of Ms. OToole's success?) Either way, I found myself right in the midst of doing exactly what this book says we all do and have begun to implement some of the steps shown here to keep myself and family safer. One of which is the target practice! I was given a handgun for protection. I tossed it aside and thought it was there if I needed it. Never have I once fired it. Common sense? Maybe but it simply never occurred to me until I read this book. That alone could save my life! Along with many other tips about keeping children safe and about ad listings on the internet and knowing your neighbors and on and on. I'd say if you are a single woman you definitely need this book! If you have children, again, invaluable information is stored here. Older people who are often victims need to read this as well. It's an easy read, nicely outlined and will make you stop and think before simply acting in the future. Thank you Ms. OToole for your efforts aimed at keeping the unsuspecting safer in many different areas of life and sharing your wealth of knowledge. Thank you and all law enforcement for your service over the years keeping the public safe.

Psychopaths do not come in neat and tidy little packages that make them easy to spot. We all THINK we can spot one but we are only fooling ourselves. They prey on this type of behavior and Mary Ellen O'Toole will teach you exactly how to reframe your thinking and save yourself from all of the rationalizing we do when it pertains to people and their personalities.

Former FBI profiler O'Toole provides readers with anecdotes from her career, along with a 4-step SMART method to assess situations and evaluate people. Her first chapter makes the point that you can't tell if people are dangerous just by looking at them, and reinforces that conclusion with a string of one-in-a-million (or less) stories. That's really not the question. The real question is whether one can improve their odds significantly through common sense, and one has to assume that is the case. Otherwise, why do we fear walking down a street at night into a crowd of minority youth in a bad section of town?

Continuing, she advises that those with handguns perform target practice - wow, that's something only 99.99% would have thought of on their own.

And on it goes. Then, I thought to check the success rates of criminal profilers. A 1981 FBI report states that in 192 cases of profile generation, there were 15 arrests that used the profile information (8%), 15% if you limit the analysis to the 88 arrests that followed. In the U.K., 184 cases involved profiling, and of these 2.7% led directly to identification of the offender, with an additional 16% where profiling helped. Or, as Wikipedia on-line put it, 'There is little empirical evidence that profiling is effective. It mostly rests on common sense justifications.'

Bottom-Line: 'Don't judge a book by its cover,' is a more useful guide than the contents of this book.

Dangerous Instincts: How Gut Feelings Betray Us = One-Word Review: DRIVEL

I gave it 1-Star because 0-Star wasn't an option.

Because of the author's credentials, I expected SO much more - at least a gem or two. But the book didn't live up to the hype - and was a complete waste of my time and money.

This book's "lessons" barely qualify as an article in a fluffy magazine - yet it was puffed up into a book. And that was only because of the author's bio as an FBI agent with a Ph.D. Big deal!

She was an FBI "interviewer" and taught that process to new agents. And that's what she tries to teach to the general public. Why? The average person doesn't have the FBI's resources to conduct formal interviews with the people they encounter in everyday life. DOH! This book might be slightly useful for rookie FBI agents and cops, etc. but it's useless for anyone else.

It's a real chore to slog through the lame logic, anecdotes, and "solutions." It's 99% fat. The first half of the book keeps promising over and over that the reader will soon learn grand things. But when finally "revealed" in the second half, they're merely obvious, common-knowledge tidbits that disappoint like a fancy gift-wrapped package with nothing inside.

The premise of this book is that FBI profiling could provide insight into daily life that ordinary feelings cannot. Ths plausible and interesting idea is not supported by the actual book. I felt the book did a poor job of integrating the author's experience as an FBI profiler with everyday situations.
The book itself states that opening the door to a serial killer is 1 in 8 million, yet this book is saturated with insinuations that ordinary people at your door could be predators. The level of acceptable risk of the authors is so low that I found their suggested precautions absurd.

There was clearly a lot of potential here, Mary Ellen O'Toole's account of her career as a profiler would make a great read, and the idea of using profiling techniques to understand how ordinary people you know and meet might react in truely everyday situations seems very valuable. However, I didn't personally think I needed a manual for serial killer prevention... oh excuse me someone "perfectly normal looking" is at the door, lemme get that!

I would find it virtually impossible to accept as useful anything this author says. She was called in on the Baton Rouge serial killer case in 2003 and developed a useless profile of that killer who murdered my daughter. In my opinion, her profile did nothing but prolong the search for the killer at the cost of additional lives. Why listen?

There are a few tidbits of useful info that you may not have considered but mostly, it just reaffirms what common sense you (hopefully) have. It doesn’t hurt to read. I’d recommend gifting this book to some of the folks you know who could use a manual on common sense...because you know, common sense isn’t common.