Carpe Jugulum: A Novel of Discworld

I've read about a dozen of the Discworld books and this is my least favorite. I had come to expect great books from Terry Pratchett and this one was disappointing. It was OK, but it was lacking much of the humor of the other books.

This is perhaps one of Terry Pratchett's less well-known Discworld novels, but I think it is one of the best – which may be all that need be said, really, but for the record:

Carpe Jugulum features the Witches, as vampires arrive in Lancre and take over the country. These are very *modern* vampires who have overcome many of their old vulnerabilities and want to use their immense power to enslave the country so they may exploit and kill people – but in an oh-so-orderly and civilised fashion while convincing everyone that it's in their best interests. It is, of course up to Granny Weatherwax, Nanny Ogg, Magrat (now Queen Magrat) and Agnes Nitt to stop them. Things don't go as you might expect, and a genuinely thrilling and at times truly scary story develops.

Pratchett manages his usual miraculous combination of a superbly gripping story, real laugh-out-loud humour and important insights. Carpe Jugulum was published in 1998 but, twenty years on, might arguably be read as an allegory of the behaviour of some current multinational companies. It certainly celebrates the individual and has plenty of Pratchett's wonderfully clear-eyed and humane insights into more intimate human issues. The opening scenes, for example, with Granny Weatherwax visiting a difficult birth and what she says about choices are among the most powerful in any of the Discworld books, I think – and yet characters like Igor, the Wee Free Men and Hodgesaargh (not to mention Nanny Ogg) add wonderful humour and wit while quietly making some very serious points.

In short, this is a great read and very, very warmly recommended.

Once again the kingdom of Lancre is in a tough spot and it’s up to Granny, Nanny, and Agnes to face-off with an enemy whose motto is Carpe Jugulum. In the 23rd installment, sixth in the Witches subseries, of Terry Pratchett’s fantasy-humor series sees vampires, sorry vampyrs, from the country of Uberwald take center stage as they are invited to invade Lancre only to get invaded back.

Lancre is celebrating the birth of Princess Esmerelda Margaret, her father has invited everyone to join the celebration including many foreign dignitaries including the ruling Count of Uberwald. Unfortunately the Count is a vampire, sorry vampyr, which means he gets to come in and take over the place. Of course, Nanny and Agnes instantly know they need to stop this and when they go to get Granny they discover an even worse problem, she’s packed up and left because the Count’s mental barrier is really strong. However after Nanny, Agnes, and their new trio member Queen Magrat herself rejoins the coven and confronts the Count leading to bad results, Granny comes in and seemingly gets defeated by the vampires. However, sometimes a defeat is a victory in disguise.

Unlike some previous Discworld books, Pratchett keeps this one tight with subplots and secondary characters being closely connected with the main story and characters. Mightily Oats, a priest of Om whose been having a crises of faith his entire life, and the blue pixie clan the “Wee Free Men” are some of the highlights of this tightened plot and subplot connection as they are both integral yet separate at the same time to the overall story. While I do not know if Mightily Oats makes a return appearance, I do know that the blue pixie clan’s time in the series I just beginning and I’m looking forward to seeing how their story will develop.

Carpe Jugulum is a very good book, but because of the feeling that it is just Lords and Ladies it falls short of being a great installment in the Discworld series.

Those of us who grew up watching Hammer films know better than to invite a vampire into our castle. But suppose you are the new jester-turned-king of a small principality on Discworld, and you want to be friends with all of your neighbors, even if they happen to be undead. (Hint: always check to see if a country has a disproportionate number of 24-hour Walgreens before issuing your invitations).

Not only does King Verence invite a family of vampires to his daughter's christening, his invitation to the powerful witch, Granny Weatherwax goes mysteriously astray.

Foopahs abound. Granny Weatherwax closes up her cottage as though she never means to return. Her friend and fellow-witch, Nanny Ogg is upset by King Verence's choice of a priest of Om as the official baptizer--a priest who relies on bits of strategically placed paper to jog his uncertain memory--which is how the little princess ends up with the name 'Esmerelda Margaret Note Spelling of Lancre.'

Of course, Lancre did once have a king named, 'My God He's Heavy the First.'

This is obviously going to shape up as one of the most disastrous christenings since Sleeping Beauty got the shaft (or more correctly, the spindle) from the thirteenth fairy godmother. Then events take a turn for the worse when the vampires happily chow through Nanny Ogg's special garlic dip without a single rumble of indigestion.

I love all of the Granny Weatherwax/Nanny Ogg Discworld novels, and even though "Carpe Jugulum" tackles some unusually serious themes (its vampires are truly evil, unlike the loveable, teetotalling Otto in "The Truth"), it is still vintage Pratchett and vintage Granny.

It is amazing how an author of such absurd fantasies can still convey such a bone-chilling description of evil. Pratchett is much more than a 'simple' comic novelist.

I was a little nervous starting this one, thinking it would be gory horror at it's finest. I was quite surprised to find it was a very humorous satire about vampires and witches. It did take me several chapters to get into it, but once I did, it was a lot of fun. This is part of a series, but I never felt lost at all just reading this one.

The king of Lancre is celebrating the birth of his new baby girl and invites the Magpyrs to join in the festivities. When Granny, Nanny, and Agnus realize there are vampires in their midst, ones who have no intentions of ever leaving, the do what they can to expose them for what they are...and fail...for these are modern vampires. These three witches set out to save their country and encounter a lot of fun, quirky characters along the way.

I loved the witches and the imagery. Granny was great fun and had a lot of good insight to share. Agnus and her inner counterpart, Perdita, constantly had me laughing. I can't forget Igor, with his lisp. I think my favorite part was when the witches were trying to determine if these guests were vampires or not. From garlic, to mirrors, to inner thoughts, and pink haze--it was a crazy, yet laughable experience.

Content: there were a couple of mild expletives used quite a lot, but apparently they're not considered swear words in England; there was some mild to moderate violence and blood, but nothing gory.

Oh how I adored this. From the title (Seize the Jugular ^_^), to the characters and the concept. Yes, it's a bit similar to Lords and Ladies, but this had a more entertaining edge.
I mean, there are my favourite witches and we get vampires? And we're poking fun at all the classic vampire movies? How could I not love? I just wish real life hadn't gotten in the way so many times and let me read this in a sane timeframe.
It starts off quite innocent, then takes a nose dive as the vampires (sorry, vampyres) arrive in Lancre with the intent to stay and farm the local populace. Worse yet, these vamps have learned and ain't going down to an axe on the neck, never mind a simple garlic clove. And what fun would it be if they did?
Things are completely thrown off-guard for me as I was expecting Granny to hop in and save the day. She's Granny after all. But no, she cannot. Instead it's left to Anges. It's interesting to see the `maiden' of the witchy trio muddle her way through the whole scene, including fighting off the advances of Vlad, a vampire who just can't seem to get what "sod off" means (or what a well-place elbow/knee can do ^_^).
I do think I wouldn't have enjoyed the bits with Oats quite as much if I hadn't already read Small Gods, but I have and enjoyed that too, so really it was more acquainting myself with an old friend and laughing at how wrong the Omnians have gotten Brutha's words and life.
Now the Nac Mac Feegles ... I'd some trouble understanding what they were saying at first (same with Igor, though he was easier), but they grew on me. How could I not like a six-inch high pictsie who likes nothing more than drinking, fighting and stealing cattle?

With his Discworld series of fantasy novels, Terry Pratchett caricatures modern society. He has tackled racism, organized religion, big business, diplomacy, economics, cartels, academia, law enforcement, Hollywood, you name it. Like all good caricatures and satires, his books offer moral lessons. Sometimes they are trite (life is worth living) most of the time they are relevant (different people should avoid fighting each other) and sometimes they are surprisingly insightful.

In Carpe Jugulum, a new generation of vampires has arrived to Discworld. People are food to all vampires, but this new lot wants to rule over us as well. They don't really want to hunt us, they want to raise us. Like cattle. And the King of Lancre, a really nice but clueless fellow, invited them over because, well, he's not prejudiced. But invite vampires over and they will never leave.

Granny Weatherwax, the wise old witch with a nasty character, groans at the thought of rescuing Lancre. She'd rather be left alone, but she doesn't like it much when the strong start lording it about over everyone. So she sets herself to ridding Lancre of these modern vampires.

She didn't mind the old ones much. Neither did most people. She didn't like them, but they were well mannered and they knew their place was outside. They respected the society that provided them with an occasional morsel. These new vampires don't care. They treat people as their property. As things. For Granny Weatherwax, treating people as things, including yourself, is where all sin starts.

We find this all the time these days. When you get layed off, the business doesn't care that you have a wife and kid, you get layed off because the business function you filled isn't relevant any more. You get tossed away. But don't think you (or I for that matter) are only a victim. You're also a perpetrator. When you go to the store and start giving hell to the person behind the counter because the widget you bought is defective, you are treating that person as a receptacle for your problems. Like a thing.

This is a surprisingly deep insight. It doesn't come from a religious text or a philosophical treatise, it isn't the fruit of years of debate among the members of this or that ethics committee on the rights of man. It comes from a comic fantasy novel written by an atheist. And it's a spot on definition of sin.

Vincent Poirier, Tokyo

Granny Weatherwax and her fellow witches must deal with vampyres in this very funny novel. King Verence of the Kingdom of Lancre has decided to invite ALL of his neighbors to the christening of his daughgter, and this includes a priest from a religion that used to burn witches (and everybody else) and several vampires from the neighboring kingdom. The vampires come to the event and decide they never want to leave, and will take over Lancre and use its inhabitants as food. Granny Weatherwax and her fellow witches have to come up with ways to fight these unusual vampyres (they're not afraid of garlic, holy symbols or sunlight) and drive them away or destroy them, before it's too late! It takes several attempts for the witches to come up with a workable plan, and plenty of help from the priest and the Igor who works for the vampyres, but eventually they manage to destroy most of the vampires and render the rest harmless.

This is a character-driven novel, and Pratchett goes deep into his witch characters to let us know what they're thinking and feeling and how they intend to meet their goals. Humor abounds in this work, as in most Pratchett books, and there are a lot of very funny throwaway lines that get tossed off as the witches try and fail, try and fail to get rid of the vampyres. Things get dicey as the witches take on the very powerful Count and his brood, and it's up to Granny Weatherwax to come up with the winning plan and take down the vampyres at last and return Lancre to its rightful king.

Terry Pratchett's first novel, "The Carpet People", appeared in 1971. "Carpe Jugulum" is the twenty-third book in his hugely popular Discworld series and was first published in 1998. It's set (mostly) in Lancre and features Granny Weatherwax's famous coven of witches.

The Lancre coven is now made up of Granny Weatherwax, Nanny Ogg and Agnes Nitt. Agnes has taken over Magrat's old cottage and is a little rotund. Like they say, though, inside every fat girl, there's a thin girl trying to get out. In Agnes's case, the thin girl is called Pedita...an imaginary friend from her childhood who refused to grow up and move out. Perdita has her own voice and personality and - while she and Agnes don't get on very will - Perdita does have a big part to play in the story).

Magrat, Agnes' predecessor, retired from witching when she married Verence, Lancre's King. The Royal Couple are now a Royal Family, and - when the book opens - the baptism of the newly-arrived Royal Daughter is approaching. However, Verence is looking to raise Lancre's profile and has invited a number of foreign dignitaries to join the royal celebrations. Foolishly, he's included the Count de Magpyr, a vampire from Uberwald, on the guest list...the Count brings his wife and two children - Vlad and Lacrimosa. They arrive fashionably late in their own stylishly black coach, driven - naturally - by an Igor. They're a progressive bunch - they occasionally drink wine instead of blood and they're trying to build up an immunity to garlic, sunlight and religious symbols. However, they have chosen to hang on to the mind-control. (Igor doesn't approve of these new-fangled ways at all and, around the stately castle, he's very much in favour of traditional squeaky doors, billowing curtains, spiders and dribbling candles.) Unsurprisingly, the de Magpyrs have decided to take over...and they're not at all worried about the famous Granny Weatherwax. In fact, the Count seems certain that Granny Weatherwax won't be long in switching sides...

Granny, Nanny and Agnes have, of course, also been invited... it is a little worrying, however, that although Granny's invite was sent she never actually received it. (Rather awkwardly, she was also supposed to be the Godmother, so her presence would have been vital even without the vampires). Worse, thinking she has been forgotten about, Granny now aparently sees the coven as Nanny, Magrat and Agnes...and believes she is no longer needed in Lancre.

Usually, christenings in Lancre are performed by Brother Perdore but - having fallen sixty feet down a gorge - Verence has sent for a priest from a neighbouring Omnian mission. Nanny is outraged, since Omnian priests have been known to set witches on fire. However, the priest in question - Mightily Oats - proves to be a useful ally in time...as do the Nac Mac Feegle, who make their debut in this book. (The Feegle are a race of small blue skinned Pictsies whose m ain hobbies are drinking, fighting and rustling livestock).

Another very funny and enjoyable book by Pratchett - I was glad to see a bit of room being made for Magrat in this one. She has changed a little - she isn't quite so drippy and, now that she's married, gets most of Nanny's crude jokes. There isn't any great rivalry between her and Agnes either - in fact, in the few moments the pair spend together, they seem to get on quite well. Thanks to Mightily, there were also a couple of nods to Brutha, from "Small Gods" - Brutha was Om's last great prophet, and is revered by Omnians everywhere.

Long before "Twilight" made vampires cool again, the witches of Lancre were battling the bloodsuckers. That proves difficult as these aren't your father's vampires; these are far more enlightened vampires (so to speak) who have learned to tolerate garlic, holy water, and even a little sunlight. When the king of Lancre invites the Magpyre clan for the christening of his daughter, the vampires decide they'll make themselves at home by taking over the kingdom and making everyone into docile sheeple.

The witches of Lancre won't stand for this, but there's just one problem: the most powerful of their coven, Granny Weatherwax, is missing and presumed sulking after her invitation to the christening gets lost. Led by the folksy Nanny Ogg, the other witches do what they can against the vampires with the help of the Wee Free Men (think Scottish Smurfs), a missionary from Omnia (think a Jehovah's Witness combined with a televangelist), and an Igor (think Dr. Frankenstein's assistant). But of course the vampires aren't going to go quietly or without some blood being shed.

Though the plot is largely the same as "Lords and Ladies" where elves terrorized Lancre, there's enough different about this so that it feels fresh. Like "Lords and Ladies" this is a little darker than previous witch adventures like "Maskerade", which I guess you should expect with vampires. For fans of "Twilight" there is a sort of romance with the sexy young vampire Vlad and Agnes, a fat young witch with a touch of schizophrenia. But really it was refreshing for me after all this "Twilight" and assorted other stuff to read something where the vampires are the bad guys.

One criticism I have is that there's a lot of stuff going on in the story and at the end it seemed like some of it didn't do a whole lot. It's like assembling a puzzle and realizing you have pieces left over. In particular the Wee Free Men angle didn't add a whole lot and while it was nice to have Magrat (formerly a witch but now the queen) back in the fold, she didn't do much either other than change diapers. When's all said and done though I think Granny Weatherwax is up to third on favorite Discworld characters list behind The Librarian and DEATH, so any book with her kicking vampire butt can't be too bad.

It's too bad then that this is the last witches book I'll be reading. They do pop up in the young adult series, but for the moment I'm not reading those. From here on out it's mostly City Watch books. Oh well.

That is all.

Those of us who grew up watching Hammer films know better than to invite a vampire into our castle. But suppose you are the new jester-turned-king of a small principality on Discworld, and you want to be friends with all of your neighbors, even if they happen to be undead. (Hint: always check to see if a country has a disproportionate number of 24-hour Walgreens before issuing your invitations).

Not only does King Verence invite a family of vampires to his daughter's christening, his invitation to the powerful witch, Granny Weatherwax goes mysteriously astray.

Foopahs abound. Granny Weatherwax closes up her cottage as though she never means to return. Her friend and fellow-witch, Nanny Ogg is upset by King Verence's choice of a priest of Om as the official baptizer--a priest who relies on bits of strategically placed paper to jog his uncertain memory--which is how the little princess ends up with the name 'Esmerelda Margaret Note Spelling of Lancre.'

Of course, Lancre did once have a king named, 'My God He's Heavy the First.'

This is obviously going to shape up as one of the most disastrous christenings since Sleeping Beauty got the shaft (or more correctly, the spindle) from the thirteenth fairy godmother. Then events take a turn for the worse when the vampires happily chow through Nanny Ogg's special garlic dip without a single rumble of indigestion.

I love all of the Granny Weatherwax/Nanny Ogg Discworld novels, and even though "Carpe Jugulum" tackles some unusually serious themes (its vampires are truly evil, unlike the loveable, teetotalling Otto in "The Truth"), it is still vintage Pratchett and vintage Granny.

It is amazing how an author of such absurd fantasies can still convey such a bone-chilling description of evil. Pratchett is much more than a 'simple' comic novelist.

Pratchett's Disworld always works best where there is the right balance of drama and humor and CARPE JUGULUM is a prime example of that balance. Granny Weatherwax, the Disc's greatest witch, is tired of being taken for granted. While respected by the community, she is tired of her role as the feared "crone" of the coven and decides it is time to move on to another life. Of course this is exactly the wrong time for Granny's despondency as a family of vampires (I'm sorry "vampyres", conditioned to ignore common deterrents like garlic and sunlight, have decided to take control of the kingdom and use the local populace as cattle. Nanny Ogg and Perdita do their level best but without Granny's guidance things look pretty grim.
Pratchett creates great foes for Granny with his darkly funny vampire family set on entering the modern world. Well-mannered to the point of ridiculousness while stills seeing the locals as food, these creatures are at turns deeply funny while trying to conquer the superstitions that have kept vampires in their place but also create an excellent sense of menace that always is present in the background and occasionally rears its ugly head. Granny Weatherwax also gains levels of complexity in this novel with Pratchett showing her in a position of something other than complete authority; humanizing her and adding more to an already intriguing creation. CARPE JUGULUM easily stands with the better novels in the Discworld series.

I've decided he's too good and too prolific for me to write a brand new review every single time I read one of his books. Discworld currently has 34 titles and every one of them will probably knock your socks off. His mind bubbles and flashes like a boiling pot of electric eels, and I simply can't get enough of his writing.

A reviewer has compared him to Geoffrey Chaucer. He reminds me more of Douglas Adams, or perhaps S Morgenstern. Great company, isn't it? He's an extremely skillful and imaginative writer, damn funny, clever and observant to boot. He's also very easy to read. A master of characterization, and if there's anything else you like about reading that I didn't mention here, assume I simply forgot. He's awesome.

Another reviewer mentioned Jonathan Swift and PG Wodehouse. Why such hallowed company? Because Pratchett belongs there! Truly, I'm enjoying my quest to read every book in the series. You should do the same, and begin your quest at the library because he's got to be there. He's awesome!

Yet another reviewer said Jerome K Jerome meets Lord of the Rings. Yeah, that works too.

Why do we, as reviewers, compare authors to other authors? Because it's easier than thinking. In the case of Terry Pratchett, it's probably because we'd otherwise wind up quoting the guy. He's so unique that we just don't know how else to cope with his greatness. Even this paragraph sounds like foamy drool raving, doesn't it? That's how all readers react to Pratchett. Reviewers simply don't have the good sense to keep it to themselves.

I could call his writing fantasy, but I could likewise call what Douglas Adams wrote science fiction. In both cases, I wouldn't be wrong, but I'd be neglecting so much and just totally missing the point. A rare few authors transcend a genre to such a degree that you know they're shouting out, loud and proud, a big fat "Bite me!"

I love Terry Pratchett's writing, and I completely understand why some folks refer to him as their favorite author. Or favourite, I should say, since we're being British. He's one of those authors that makes you want to grab whoever's in hearing range and start reading passages aloud. I'm simply thrilled that there's such an extremely talented and prolific author who's been working for years without me being aware of him. Now I have much catching up to do, and I will love it.

Those of us who grew up watching Hammer films know better than to invite a vampire into our castle. But suppose you are the new jester-turned-king of a small principality on Discworld, and you want to be friends with all of your neighbors, even if they happen to be undead. (Hint: always check to see if a country has a disproportionate number of 24-hour Walgreens before issuing your invitations).

Not only does King Verence invite a family of vampires to his daughter's christening, his invitation to the powerful witch, Granny Weatherwax goes mysteriously astray.

Foopahs abound. Granny Weatherwax closes up her cottage as though she never means to return. Her friend and fellow-witch, Nanny Ogg is upset by King Verence's choice of a priest of Om as the official baptizer--a priest who relies on bits of strategically placed paper to jog his uncertain memory--which is how the little princess ends up with the name 'Esmerelda Margaret Note Spelling of Lancre.'

Of course, Lancre did once have a king named, 'My God He's Heavy the First.'

This is obviously going to shape up as one of the most disastrous christenings since Sleeping Beauty got the shaft (or more correctly, the spindle) from the thirteenth fairy godmother. Then events take a turn for the worse when the vampires happily chow through Nanny Ogg's special garlic dip without a single rumble of indigestion.

I love all of the Granny Weatherwax/Nanny Ogg Discworld novels, and even though "Carpe Jugulum" tackles some unusually serious themes (its vampires are truly evil, unlike the loveable, teetotalling Otto in "The Truth"), it is still vintage Pratchett and vintage Granny.

It is amazing how an author of such absurd fantasies can still convey such a bone-chilling description of evil. Pratchett is much more than a 'simple' comic novelist.

Fans of Terry Pratchett already know the comic prowess the writer possesses, so as one of the later books in his Discworld series, Carpe Jugulum is not surprisingly funny.

For a first time reader, however, it is.

Although it takes a bit longer to digest some of the finer elements - the many different characters in the book, for example - once you get going there's no slowing down. The book practically flies by (though not necessarily on a broom) because the author visits a different character every few pages, so there is little lag in the book.

Also, the lack of chapters is a bit disconcerting, at first, but not a major problem.

'Jugulum' is not the first in the witches series thread, but it's not hard to pick up what's going on if you pay attention. I won't go into explaining the unique method Pratchett's used to compose the Discworld universe, but suffice it to say that everything is not linear in the least bit.

As far as the actual work of the novel goes, Pratchett does a great job pacing the hilarious adventures of the witches and vampires, and the utterly fantastic fantasy characters are so life-like you really lose sense that it's a fantasy novel at all. Satire is prevalent in the subplots, and Pratchett is very sly in his dealings with religion and religious indoctrination, both very important themes throughout 'Carpe Jugulum.'

Like the cover suggests, there's a bit of Carl Hiaasen (for the humor) and and Kurt Vonnegut (for the satire) in the book, and that's a huge compliment for a pure genre writer. Though pop fiction is hardly given the credit it deserves, I think that Pratchett's books - Carpe Jugulum, in particular - will survive for generations.

How can you not like a book about vampires and witches?

Agnes Nitt is seething with resentments. Virtually conscripted into Lancre's witches' coven as the junior member, she replaces Magrat Garlick as "the maiden." She feels she's in Magrat's shadow, but given their comparative girths, that takes some doing. Agnes' size adds to her resentments, but she can't help being heavy. If that wasn't enough, she suffers an alter ego named Perdita who can't refrain from commenting on Agnes' size, personality or appearance. An petulant character, Agnes isn't easy to like, but she bears heavy burdens - besides herself.
Attending a naming ceremony for Magrat's newborn, Agnes encounters two new men in her life. Mightily Oats is a priest of Om who's spent far too much time in libraries to act as a rock of the faith. Omnians used to burn people, except, according to Granny Weatherwax, never witches. Time brings change, and Omnism was forever changed by the Prophet Brutha. Disputation, replacing [In]Quisition, led to so many schismatics debating theology that in Oats' case, he's constantly debating himself. Later, when it's Granny he's debating, the scene is one of Pratchett's most outstanding exchanges.
The other young man is more imposing. Vlad Magpyr is a member of a family relocating to Lancre from the Uberwald. They've arrived to take over the country. They're vampires - yuppie vampires, no less. Under the tutelage of Count Magyr, they're trying an Uberwald version of The Power of Positive Thinking. That means they're learning to resist all the usual weapons against vampires. "Garlic? Just a seasoning." Sunlight? Build up an immunity by starting with cloudy days and working to brighter ends. This version of "self-help" has made them very powerful. In fact, they appear invulnerable against any attempt to control them.
The Lancre witches coven should be able to resist the vampires' takeover of Lancre without difficulty - evil forces have been overcome in the past. The coven's membership, however, has shifted roles. Granny Weatherwax, doyenne of Discworld witchdom, has gone walkabout in a fit of pique. The traditional arrangement of "maiden, mother, crone" promotes Nanny Ogg to the primary role. She's comfortable with neither the role nor its label. Lancre witches are nothing if not flexible, however, and the shifted roles lead to some interesting changes in personality. Magrat's new responsibility as a mum is still settling itself, but rest assured, former witch or not, "tradition" is a word cast well aside.
Pratchett's Discworld narratives successively display less humour, but increasingly more wit and insight. His knowledge of our world is shrewdly presented through his stories of the Disc. What other "fantasy" writer gives you glimpses of plate tectonics, evolution and the drought-producing El Nino? Who else presents us with little painted blue men, speaking an almost familiar language and the most talented cattle thieves on the Disc? They also write "verra comp-lic-ated documents" as any London solicitor could attest.
This story might be viewed as a simple contest between good and evil. Not in Pratchett's hands. Evil is rarely absolute on Discworld and good's victories seldom unqualified. Vlad Magpyr asks Agnes to compare the vampires' plans for Lancre with human's raising beef cattle. Vampires may make people slaves, but can also keep their minds at ease. Isn't that a fair trade-off? Does it sound familiar? The struggle against such logic requires strength of will and a clear mind. Which of the triad's five has sufficient talent to bring such talents to bear? They all have certain insights into the mind's workings. One of them even terms the true power of witches "headology," granting it greater power than magic. Is this power effective against the forces of the Magpyr clan? Does the logic of the conclusion appeal to you? If this book has a weakness, it is the ending. Yet once again, Pratchett has fulfilled his desire to portray "a mirror of worlds."

Carpe Jugulum, the 23rd Discworld novel by the ever-amusing Terry Pratchett, introduces vampires to the Disc. Having read the books out of order, and having already read all of the subsequent ones, vampires are old-hat to me. A couple of times, I had to consciously remember that this was the first and that some of the things I knew about them weren't true in this one. That being said, this is another wonderful Discworld book, a notch on his belt that looks rather toothy.
A number of people have commented on the similarities between this book and Lords & Ladies, with the vampires replacing the elves as villains. While I do see some similarities, there are some marked differences as well. Carpe Jugulum, I feel, stands well on its own two feet. There is a completely different purpose behind what the vampires are doing. The Count wants to modernize his people, to get them to overcome some of the "silly" stereotypes about vampires. He doesn't want a dank, gloomy castle with webs all over the place. He doesn't see the hunt as a game where the vampire always loses. He wants to take over in order to protect himself, his family, and his very way of life. If he didn't commit some thoroughly evil deeds in the process, his goal might actually be a legitimate one.
However, he does commit these acts, and thus must be stopped. This is where the book does become a little standard, with an intractable enemy facing the witches and Granny using her "headology" to save the day. I have to admit that what she decides to do is very interesting, and a nice twist on vampire myths in general. I won't reveal what she does, but suffice it to say that she turns one of the typical vampire powers back on itself in a very novel way. The plot is well-told by Pratchett, and for once the ending doesn't actually come out of left field. If you read the characters properly (especially Igor, who is also introduced in this book), then you may be able to guess what happens.
As for the characters, Pratchett again excels. The witches are their normal selves (Magrat is kind of shy but shields a strong backbone when push comes to shove, Nanny Ogg is lewd and crude but always knowledgeable, and Granny is her usual gruff self with a heart underneath which nobody will ever see unless they really look), but the new witch Agnes is also very interesting. She has a second side to herself which occasionally comes out. It is a separate personality, which is invaluable in protecting her from the vampire charms. Mightily Oats is also a hoot, but deep enough that you do start to care about him. His crisis of faith isn't exactly unique, but Pratchett gives him enough differences to avoid making him unoriginal.
The vampires steal the show, though, along with Igor. We have the Count, who is determined to change things. His wife, the Countessa, is going along with him but doesn't really believe in it. The kids, Lacrimosa and Vlad, don't see any point to all this. They just want to feed and play with the mortals. These four argue constantly, as the Count flashes them holy signs to harden them against the effects, makes them stay up during the day, and overall annoys them with his optimism that all of these things can be changed. He's also looking forward to matching wits with Granny, and there are a couple of times where you think that maybe Granny won't succeed. Igor, however, is the best character in the book. The vampires are sure that his lisp and the way he walks is all part of the "game" and that he doesn't need to do all of that. But Igor is a traditionalist, constantly referring to how the old "mathter" used to do things. "The old mathter loved my spider webs." He's a fun character, and I completely understand why Pratchett has used an Igor in almost every book since this one. He truly is a wonderful creation.
The humour is Pratchett at his best, with some innuendo (though kids have either already heard it or wont' get it). The Witches books always seem to contain things like that, and as before, the plot is much more straightforward then is usual in a Discworld book. He seems to like using the "traditional" villains whenever they are involved, perhaps because they are the most "normal" heroes he has created. Sometimes there are some seemingly unnecessary bits, such as the little blue people (Nac mac Feegle) who help King Verence attack the vampires. However, they are hilarious, so I'll forgive the fact that they don't really do a lot in the book. The puns are atrocious (the name of the vampires' castle is "Don'tgonearthe Castle") but I couldn't stop laughing.
If you like Pratchett but don't like the Witches, then this book won't change your mind. But if you haven't tried them yet, give this one a try. You don't need to have read the previous witches books (though it does help). And if you're reading this after reading the next few books, keep in mind that some things you know about vampires just aren't true...yet. What a bloody treat!
David Roy

I must admit I'm a sucker for the Witches of Lancre stories. I've always felt that Pratchett is at his best when his books are wrapped around a Big Idea and who better than Granny Weatherwax, the mistress of "headology" to tackle those? There are actually two story threads that have some real meat to them. There's the main thurst of the novel surrounding the efforts to rid the Disc of the Magpyre clan, whose charming nastiness makes us take a look at the nature of Evil. But even better is the journey undertaken by Granny Weatherwax and the Omnian priest Mightily Oats. Not just a dangerous journey through the forest of Uberwald to the vampyre's lair, it's a spiritual journey for the doubting Oats that explores faith, religion and the nature of Good. Not only does this potentially cardboard character develop a rich characterization through his trials, but we also get to see a more human face of Mistress Weatherwax.

In true Discworld form, there's plenty of silliness to be found (including the line "Let's kick some bat!"), but it's the depth that can be found within the comic chaos that brings me back to this book time and time again.

King Verence of Lancre is a very modern king who doesn't believe in old prejudices. Since the Uberwald is a near neighbor, it only seems natural to invite a family of vampires to his baby's christening. The vampires are very modern as well. But their modern ideas involve moving out of their old castle and into the much more modern one of King Verence--and of taking over his kingdom. Since they've trained themselves not to mind little things like garlic, religious symbols, or holy water, they might just be a little hard to dislodge--especially since they can control the minds of anyone who comes near them. Unfortunately for Lancre, all the kingdom has to defend it are four witches and a dubious priest of Om.

Author Terry Pratchett delivers a fun-filled adventure. Agnes and the hapless Oats are nicely developed characters with enough complexities to keep a psychologist busy for years. Agnes, the maiden of the witch triad (I know I said four, but it gets complicated) has conflicted feelings toward the handsome vampire Vlad, but then, she's conflicted enough internally so she hardly notices. Pratchett fans will be delighted to see that the faith of Om has made a comeback and that the prophet Brutha really did transform that religion.
Pratchett's Discworld series is filled with stories that take our familiar fairy tales and turn them around. CARPE JUGULUM (seize the throat) retells the story of Dracula, but with a somewhat overweight witch as the love interest, vampires interested in becoming completely modern, and village mobs who can be counted on to riot on command. As always with Pratchett, CARPE JUGULUM delivers plenty of smiles and a few out-loud laughs.

This is just one of umpteen reviews, so I'll skip the summary. In fact, the only reason I'm reviewing this AT ALL is that I bought the book through the store, so every time I write a review of something else, they remind me I still haven't reviewed this one.
But, after having it for months, I've finally started to read it. Wow, I'm glad that I did!
Let's be honest. The plot is really secondary to the characters. And that is where PTerry shines. He gives us characters with motivations and passions, likes and fears, and he lets the humor flow from that, rather than forcing a plot point to make the humor come out. PTerry's humor is never forced.
However, as many have pointed out, this plot is a re-hasing of Lords and Ladies. Without a doubt, Lords and Ladies is my favorite. So when this plot also takes place in Lancre with an outside force of supernatural beings assaulting the kingdom, it felt like I was coming back to a well-eorn fable. I knew the plot, and I could concentrate on reading about the characters.
And we learn so much about the characters this time. Nanny Ogg and Agnes get some great treatment this time around (which they lacked in previous books), and even Granny Weatherwax gets some new twists. The characters are delicious.
Why a four star rating instead of a five, then? Because PTerry wasn't as inventive this time. In Lords and Ladies, we see Elves in a different way. Cliches are broken, mangled, played with, and twisted. But the Vampires (vampyrs, as they prefer) are somewhat mundane. One of them is even named Vlad, for Pete's sake! PTerry certainly did give us a new take on some of the traits of the Vampires, but they didn't get the much-needed overhaul that the Elves got previously.
Otherwise, an entertaining, highly-readable, highly-quotable book (as Discworld books tend to be). But it's still the younger, less successful brother compared to Lords and Ladies.

You can say a lot about King Verence, ruler of the kingdom of Lancre, but one is unlikely to claim that his policies are not liberal enough. He is not only married to the beautiful witch Magrat, but he even finds inviting the people from Uberwald to his baby shower a very, good idea. And this would indeed have been a nice gesture of peace, if it was not for the fact that the invitees are actual Vampyres (that do not know how to spell). Everyone knows that inviting Vampyres to your country will lead to not much good. Luckily the witches Nanny, Perdita and Agnes are there to safe the day (again). But what in Om's name happened to Granny Weatherwax?

Carpe Jugulum is already the 23rd instalment of the immensely popular Discworld series and still Terry Pratchett seems far from loosing his magical touch. Like always the plot is not the main attraction of a Discworld novel, but the crazy characters surely are. The central cast this time is given to Granny Weatherwax and her fellow witches, but very early in the story they are pushed aside by the other characters. Igor, the coachman who stitches on body parts if the need arises, and Scraps, his dog made out off -you guessed- scarps, will both play a central role in the story. The Magpyr family of Vampyres, proves that an identity crisis can turn out to be fatal, even for immortals. But also the many other characters make Carpe Jugulum a rich and funny story.

As an extra treat Terry has introduced Mightily-Praiseworthy-Are-Ye-Who-Exalteth-Om Oats, the Omnian priest. When faced with the immeasurable power of the Vampyres, Mightily Oats starts to doubt his own believes. This gives Terry ample opportunities to squeeze in some tongue-in-cheek remarks on how we deal ourselves with religion. Knowing that Terry himself is a true non-believer this leads to one of the most hilarious philosophical discussions ever to occur in the Discworld and beyond.

Not being a huge fan of fantasy I find it hard to write a review for the occasional Terry Pratchett novel I do read. I enjoy is offbeat look at the real world in translation to his books and enjoy the corny humor that is sprinkled in. However I find myself giving every Pratchett three stars because they all seem to be lacking something. The hard thing is that the something is something I cannot put my finger on.
"Carpe Juglum" or "Seize the Throat" takes place in the land of Lancre. There is great cause for celebration in Lancre since the Queen has given birth to the first child of the royals. In a massive celebration by inviting many guests. The guest include vampires from Uberwald, and everybody knows not too invite a vampire into your castle. Quickly the vampires take over the land of Lancre, and it is up to the witches of Lancre and the weak in faith priest Mightly Oats to save the dayand drive the vampires back or become a servant to there leader.
In total the book is fun and cute in it's own way. Igor the vampire's servant gives the book many laughs. To get in touch with witches a reader might want to try out other Discworld novels with these characters in it. They beginning is a little cloudy and some earlier information will be helpful to any new Pratchett reader

[For context's sake, I have been reading the Discworld books in publication order. Carpe Jugulum is #23.]

I'm not sure that the book was cohesive enough throughout to warrant a five-star rating, but it was so enjoyable that I can't help myself. It was a nice surprise to learn that the Nac Mac Feegle make an early appearance here; I hadn't known or expected that. Pratchett did keep ahead of me twist-wise a few times, which is always fun. Everything was convoluted but not overly so, the plot moved along well for the most part, and the humor was great as always. Nanny Ogg was a bit more restrained in the humor department than in some past books, but that ultimately didn't detract from anything.

I actually read this about a month ago, but for some reason the store was not accepting reviews. I guess that is because the US edition isn't out yet. I occasionally have a chance to get the UK edition, which is why I have already read this. Anyway, this was a great book. Not as many laugh-out-loud moments as some of the Discworld books, but it more than makes up for that by having a more engaging and interesting story than most of this series. Obviously, I am a big fan of this series. Given the popularity of vampires in fantasy fiction nowadays, it was perhaps inevitable that Pratchett would put his own spin on the sub-genre. It such a good story that it would've been worth reading, perhaps three stars, with no humor at all. For those who think Terry has been slipping a bit lately, all I can say is read this one. As good as the Discworld series is, my all-time favorite of his was the collaboration with Neil Gaiman, "Good Omens." Wouldn't it be fun to see him do a vampire collaboration with Kim Newman? Just a thought.

I read this a while ago when it came out in the UK. After the severe mediocrity of The Last Continent, I was really hoping this would represent a return to form for the Discworld series. Alas, this hope has been dashed...
Probably the worst aspect of this novel (aside from the almost total lack of anything really funny) is the number of utterly irrelevant side plots. The pixes, for instance. They appear briefly, and they do...absolutely nothing significant. It's bizarre: it seems as if Pratchett just forgot about them or got bored with them (they really aren't very interesting) and decided to just phase them out. The phoenix is similar--it may play a pivotal, if small, role in the novel's climax, but it wasn't nearly built up enough throughout the story. One aspect I did like was the bits with Mightily Oats and Granny Weatherwax, but those aren't enough to redeem the novel as a whole. As with The Last Continent, I really had to struggle to get all the way through it. Man, a little while ago Pratchett was just throwing out classics right and left--Soul Music, Interesting Times, Hogfather--and now this. I've read every Discworld novel, and I would say that this and TLC, along with Maskerade, definitely represent the series's nadir. Ah well...I suppose I'll still read The Fifth Elephant <shudders at horrific pun>--the plot seems somewhat promising. Still, if that's not a stunning comeback, it seems likely that I'll lose all hope...

Many Terry Pratchett fans see Carpe Jugulum as a recycling of Lords and Ladies. Being a Witches of Lancre book with Granny Weatherwax and her crew there are some undeniable similarities, but for me personally it is a superior book largely for the plot line surrounding Brother Oats.
The conversations between Brother Oats and Granny Weatherwax, allows Pratchett to revisit some of the religious and philosophical territory he touched on with Small Gods. The role that doubt plays in faith and other similar questions are treated with a combination of both levity and seriousness.

I love Mr. Pratchet's depth of understanding of the female mind. Each of his witches share different aspects and, to my female mind, are spot on. I personally resonate on Granny's frequency. I also loved the skewering of prideful, self important religions that, yet, found a core of truth at the center in a totally hilarious way. And the introduction of the Nac Mac Feegle pictsies, get it?, Picts, was hilarious!

I do hope that more of the Lancre witches inspire Mr.Pratchet to once again regale us with another tale of their adventuresome ways!

Hail and well met Terry Pratchet! You brighten my days!

Terry Pratchett is the master of so many genres, it must be hard to stay fresh, yet he does not even make the attempt in "Carpe Jugulum". The story is a virtual re-write of another boring tale from Pratchett's pen, "Lords and Ladies", and it seems to me that his increasing dependence on letting the characters weave their own stories is losing steam. The Witches no longer seem fresh; their personalities, once intriguing and mystical, have grown stale and predictable; and even the new characters, the Magpyrs and Mightily Oats, are given paper thin veneers to their characters. I almost screamed aloud at the predictable "Granny saves the day" ending, which I wish that Pratchett would get away from.
In its defense, the book is slick and well written, as are all of the Discworld books, but "Carpe Jugulum" leaves (pardon the pun) a bad taste in the mouth. Rincewind's "The Last Continent" got better with repeated readings, (though it is still not a worthy successor to arguably the best Disc book, "Interesting Times,") and the Guards novels compete with one another in cleverness, but it seems that the witches books have lost their charm. "Wyrd Sisters", "Witches Abroad", and even "Equal Rites" were all brilliant stories with new characters bursting to acquire identities. The dark "Lords and Ladies", the horrible "Maskerade" and "Carpe Jugulum" have all shown that the bloom is off the rose; the latest Disc novel, "The Fifth Elephant", is another Guards novel, and let's hope that Terry has decided that Vimes, Angua, Carrot, Ramkin and Vetinari are where the future of the Discworld lies. And come to think of it, we haven't had a good Death book in about 4 years...

The Witches books in the series are some of my favorites, but this one is not as good as the others. I'll admit that the anti-religious tones and philosophizing are a couple of the major reasons. Having minored in religions in college, I've heard most of the usual arguments and debates before (ex. similarity of religious stories and ancient myths, how do we really know what happened years ago, and stories are written by "the winners", etc.) and it's all pretty old to me. Hearing Pratchett's character regurgitate these this stuff just doesn't do anything for me. I know Pratchett's books typically have their philosophical side, but this type of philosophy really doesn't appeal to me. It wouldn't have been so bad if he hadn't had the priest burn his holy book. I majored in history, and I've had the phrase, "Those who start by burning books end by burning bodies," drummed into my head. (Not that anyone ended up getting burned, but the thought is still there.) Really, my impression was that Pratchett was trying too hard to lecture and make some kind of point at the expense of the story.

On the up side, the book still has its fun moments. The idea that a group of vampires might try to get over their weaknesses to holy water, garlic, and sunshine through exposure therapy and positive thinking is hilarious, and Agnes's inner conversations with her sarcastic alternate personality, Perdita, are pretty funny, too. Reading this book will also give you an introduction to the Nac Mac Feegle and Igors, which appear in other books, especially The Fifth Elephant and the Tiffany Aching series.

Pratchett takes the wonderful whimsy of his famous Discworld and mixes it with a dash of nasty horror. This time out Granny Weatherwax, Nanny Ogg and the other witches of their coven must protect their homeland of Lancre from an incursion by a clan of vampires who have been training themselves to be immune to such things as garlic and religious icons (it's all psychosomatic, you see). Pratchett, as always, is brilliantly funny and biting with his satire. No target is safe. As the title of the book implies, Pratchett's motto seems to be "carpe jugulum... go for the throat."
I must admit, as far as the series-within-a-series Discworld books go, it took time for me to warm up to Granny Weatherwax. She and her coven have become some of my favorites among Pratchett's creations, though, and this book was perhaps their best outing yet.

Funnier than Lords and Ladies, we also get some Igor. The vampires are done well; these are modern vampires ("vampyres,") and there is a reason they tend to resemble Marilyn Manson wannabees. The pixies are great, the young priest is great, and the pop-horror and pop-horror-parody references come thick and fast. Granny Weatherwax features in this one and saves the day as usual, but it isn't quite clear exactly how (she has a talent for "borrowing" in which she can leave her body and take over animals, but in this case she apparently puts a bit of herself into a number of different people; this is a bit too "magical" for my taste, and seems to violate the spirit of Discworld, where magic is real, but has specific limits and constraints). If you don't care about consistency, though, this is not a bad choice.

Okay, I have this odd sence of de ja vu when I read a vampire novel, I mean if you read 3 how different can the 4th be? Not this one. It's a beautiful satire and has far too many one liners and jokes like all Terry Pratchett books to really go into. It has Nanny Ogg and Granny Weatherwax two of the witches in Lancre driving out the vampires (sorry, vampyres)who were invited in by King Verence for his daughter's christening. Possibly my favorite bit, was when the older vampires are making fun of young vampires who wear bright clothes and stay up until noon and wear their hair short and tell people that their name is Pam or Agnes.... it's a very funny quick read. I also have a hard time thinking of it being a blow off. There are bits with Granny Weatherwax that make you feel you may have just read somethingg important.

While I love Pratchett's complex and gleefully intricate plotting, there are times in his books where it feels as though he loses track of it a little bit along the way. Or, perhaps, to put it better, he knows exactly what's going on, but loses the reader a little along the way. Such is the case with Carpe Jugulum, which begins with a royal birth and ends up containing violent gnomes, modern vampires, a traditionalist Igor, a phoenix, several cases of possession, religion, and witches. Juggling that many elements isn't a problem for Pratchett, who brings something interesting and novel to each of them, most notably in the form of the Omnian priest, a character which works as a continuation of the themes began in Small Gods (a book which is referenced directly here). The problem is that not all of the elements feel necessary, and by the book's end, I was a little confused as to what some of them had to do with anything. Still, I enjoyed all of the scenes, even if some went nowhere, and that goes a long way to excusing the book's faults. It's definitely second-tier Pratchett (with the exception of the Omnian priest storyline, which is brilliant), but that merely means that it's "very good" and not "excellent".

I've read nearly all the Discworld novels and I have to say this is one of the strangest. It's not very funny, for one thing, being much darker and with a more brooding tone than the others. It's in the witches subseries and it's about vampires (the title means "Go for the throat"), but unlike the teetotaling Black Ribboners in the other books, these creatures are downright evil in the classic 19th century fictional mold of the undead. The vampires come, of course, from Uberwald, and King Verence of Lancre (the Fool that was), in a spirit of evenhanded humanity, has invited them in for his daughter's naming ceremony. Of course, the only way vampires can enter a home is by invitation, and in this case, the king's "home" is the entire country. And they have every intention of making themselves at home. Granny Weatherwax, not having received her invitation, goes off in a huff, especially, since Magrat, the youngest witch (the Maiden) has been replaced by Agnes Nitt of the split personality. Magrat, now the Queen, is also a mother (or the Mother), which means Nanny Ogg is set to be the Crone -- which doesn't please her at all. Anyway, there's also a phoenix, and a singleminded Master of Falconry, and a doubting priest of Om, and Igor the driver (it's still his name at this point; he hasn't yet become "AN Igor"). And we get to meet the Nac mac Feegle, the six-inch-high "wee free men," who paint themselves blue and love to fight, drink, and steal cattle. (Well, they are Pict-sies. . . .) Pratchett is a highly original master of the language, with such gems as "I understood every word in that sentence, but not the sentence itself." He's also a master of stealth philosophy: "This was a test. Everything was a test. Everything was a competition. You had to make choices. You never got told which ones were right. Oh, some of the priests said you got given marks afterward, but what was the point of that?" Also: "Sin, young man, is when you treat people as things. Including yourself. That's what sin is." But, while there's some good, thoughtful stuff here, it's still a strange book.

No-one who has really read this book can find that this is a rewrite of Lords and Ladies. While Lords and Ladies was the weakest book of the whole series and made me somehow dislike the Witches sphere, this one reconciliates me with it. Finally the other witches have stepped out of Granny Weatherwax's shadow. This makes the book far more interesting than e.g. Lords and Ladies or Witches Abroad. The weakness of Granny Weatherwax in this book makes her a more human and less dominant character. While with the other books I nearly feeled that Granny would somehow take over sometime, this one puts her in her right position again. Nanny Ogg, Magrat and especially Agnes finally get the role they deserve.
Beside the Witches theme, the vampire theme has also been treated in an excellent manner. By exaggerating and mixing the attributes usually identified with vampires, Pratchett has created a marvellous satire, only comparable to Pyramids.
Finally, with the priest of Om, the religious theme is again treated in Carpe Jugulum. I was very pleased with that because I think that Small Gods was one of Pratchetts best books and regretted that religious controverse didn't reappear in his following books.
Conclusion: a masterpiece in every aspect

Pratchett's previous book, "The Last Continent", about the Disc's equivalent of Australia made me lose faith in one of Britain's most talented authors. It seemed that he'd finally run out of steam, wallowing in old characters without trying to do anything new but (as you can probably tell by the 5 stars above) it seems he's back on form.
It seems that just about every passing mythological creature wants to mess with Lancre these days. They're fighting tooth and nail (and fang and talon) to take over. Following on from the elves of "Lords and Ladies" are a family of vampires who have decided that their kind should stop lurking around in the shadows and living in impractical gothic mansions and take over Lancre, with the rest of the world to follow. No longer happy with how things are, they've decided to enslave the humans of the Disc (they obviously don't believe in free-range food). Sadly, they make the mistake of starting with a certain small county starting with "L"...
Whereas in "Last Continent", Pratchett seemed to forget about character progression (aside from poor Ponder Stibbons), he's back on form here. Agnes Nitt stops being a slightly more tough version of Magrat and becomes a fully fledged character in herself, whilst Granny's put through the emotional wringer again. As well as bringing back the old familiar (in both senses of the word) characters, CJ also brings in some new people - a priest who's lacking in self-confidence and a stereotypical igor being two of the most memorable.
In fact, there are only a couple of problems with the book, starting with the aforementioned igor character - in a world where Pratchett seems desparate to supply explanation for every odd occurance (how gods are 'made' in "Small Gods" or how an aerodynamically dragon can fly in "Guards! Guards!) the idea behind a community where people are sewn together from their relatives' body parts just doesn't feel... right (it makes for some pretty good jokes though). Likewise, there's a grey area as to exactly who's been turned into a vampire by the end of the book.
But it quotes a Beautiful South song, so that's okay.
Still, it's great to see Pratchett back on form. Welcome back, sir.

Usually, all Pratchett's books are great. This was merely good.
The story line required a villain. The main offense of the head vampire was lack of respect for tradition.
We are told that when the children see the vampires killed, this will cure their nightmares, not cause them, yet we never see the vampires as monsters of nightmare, but as regular people, no more (and no less) evil than your IRS auditor.
We are told the vampires are totally evil, and everyone acts as though they were totally evil, but the IRS seems to me to be a lot more of a bloodsucker than any of the vampires. The top vampire should have used and discarded his wife, rather than had a normal family. He should have casually killed people, instead of collecting a modest and reasonable blood tax. The king was insufficiently kingly. He should have died defending his kingdom as soon as he escaped from the vampires mind control, rather than being pushed around as the passive victim of circumstances.
Given a choice between being a citizen of Lancre and being forced to make blood donations, and being a citizen of the US and forced to make money donations, I think I would choose Lancre.

It amazes me every time how big Pratchetts imagination is, how he can take all familiar stories and fairytales and give them a brand new aproache...

He does it again in Carpe Jugulum ("seize the troath"), where he taccles vampires who are entering the new century, by calling themselves vampyres, dressing in modern clothes, livyng in a clean castle, eating galic...

The trouble starts in Lancre when king Verence invites all his neighbours, including the vampyres, to the name-giving of his daughter and granny's invitation gets lost...

The vampyres take over the castle, granny is competely under their spell, granny is missing... it doesn't look good... But there also is Agnes/Perdita, who doesn't fall for the vapyre tricks and seeks help in the form of nanny Ogg and a priest of Ohm...

This is my return to Discworld after a 12 year hiatus. It focuses on all the witches and is considered number 6 in the witch cycle. But I don't know how much difference it makes in reading them in order. Unlikely alliances are formed, a clueless Omnian and Nanny Weatherwax, Death SHOWS UP, and a new breed of culturally aware vampires, the Magpyres, introduce themselves to the citizens of Lancre and attemp to take over unsuccessfully.

I love Terry Pratchet's Discworld novels, and I'm partial to the novels featuring the witches. This novel, however, is by far my favorite. Not only to you have Granny Weatherwax, Nanny Ogg, and Agnes Nit, you get a pack of vampires and an army of pixies -- I mean, Pictsies.
Although the Pictsies are amusing, what really makes this novel is the family of vampires who want to lead a normal life. Particularly amusing is the Count's teenage daughter, Lacci (short for Lacrimosa), who does the most un-vampiric things, like staying up until noon, wearing brightly-colored clothes, and asking her friends to call her Gertrude.
You can never go wrong with a Discworld novel, and this one in particular is amazingly funny!

"Carpe Jugular" was an excellant book. The continuation of events in Lancre, where "Maskerade" had left off, were well-crafted. The introduction of the modern-thinking Count Magpyre and his two Gen-X kids as the threat to the tiny kingdom was interesting. Especially the resemblence of his two teenage kids to the 'cooler then thou' goth culture that has appeared in the youth culture. The appearance of the gnomes, (er..pixies), was hilarious. Pratchett's humor was best convied through the hard-working, but under-appreciated, Igor and King Verence II. I say, read this book. It's humorous, insightful, and will even surprise you, occasionally.

"Witches Three" or "Witches Four"? Somehow, it was inevitable that Prachett would exploit the "Witch in Government" scenario he set up. Granny Weatherwax is still one of his most intriguing characters, and she's just as cantankerous as ever. Still-I really had a hard time warming to this book.
Up-scale vampires I meet every day. Government up-scale vampires I work with every day. I hate 'em. The vampires are poorly developed and not really interesting; if it wasn't for Nanny Ogg there would be precious little humor at all. I've re-read the book to make sure I didn't miss something... and I didn't. This one is weak and not funny.
Prachett does present some philosophical outlooks on human existence that give food for thought. As far as I can see, that's the only thing that makes it worth while to get this book. Stick it in your collection and read it once in a Blue Moon.
Heavens to... Murgatroyd!

I have had the enormous pleasure of reading every one of the Discworld novels (I even have a signed copy of 'The Last Continent') and I can honestly say that every one has improved when re-read. I have read them all at least twice, and most on three occasions.
The first time around, Carpe Jugulum is reasonably amusing, not a patch on the earlier books, but on re-reading, many of the more subtle aspects of the story came to the fore. I tend to read fairly quickly, so I don't gleam the full myriad of wealth from the book after one reading. However, this allows for multiple re-reads as there is always something new to discover in the vast tapestry of the novel.
I highly recommend this book, but don't settle for just reading it once.
PS 'The Fifth Elephant', the new one, is even better.

Vampires have invaded Lancre and any fan of Granny Weatherwax, Nanny Ogg and Magrat Garlick won't be disappointed with their adventures. Magrat has gone through some pleasing changes, and Agnes ("She that calls herself Perditax") has become a very interesting addition to the coven.
_Carpe Jugulum_, like all the other Discworld novels, is not simply straight-forward fantasy, or just an amusing read. It's difficult to review a Discworld novel because they manage to be both amazingly funny and poignant at the same time. There are some truly beautiful moments in this book, and I cried with laughter more than once on reading it.
If you enjoy humorous fantasy, you'll never find anything as remotely funny as Pratchett. If you're tired of having your intelligence insulted by the usual, tired fantasy plot devices and characters and don't mind thinking, I heartily suggest this book and all the other Discworld series.

Ever since that short story from "Legends," Granny Weatherwax has been one of my favorite characters. This book is basically about her finding the strength to overcome her inner 'Perdita.' She does this with the usual flair and Weathewax-iness that she does everything else with.
The phoenix, I believe, is just supposed to be a symbol. Apparently, only Granny (and maybe Oats) can touch the phoenix feather. If you were truely evil, you'd be burnt to a crispy-creme. Granny isn't evil, although she doubts herself because of her ancestory. (It was reputed that her grandmother became a vampire, but the old vampire says she cut his head off. And, we all know about her sister. See Witches Abroad.) When the phoenix rises for all to see, it is Granny's ultimate triumphant over her 'dark' side.
The pixies were just there to take care of the king. Pratchett had to do something with him. And it was endearingly funny.
This is a good book. Better then the LC by far. However, Hogfather is still my favorite. This would be my second. This would be a great animated movie (HINT HINT)

Having speed-read the top 3 or 4 reviews at the store.com, it seems that almost all complained about the point of the phoenix character...My suggestion to all those potential Prachett fans, is IGNORE THIS BALDERDASH! DON'T BE turned off by those who failed to grasp the point of this character (and why it is included) My hint to all is this: the "Vampyres" of "Don'tgonearthecastle" are "modern." The phoenix is of the "old races", like the "Pictsies" with their hilarious warrior cry of "Ta can only be one t'ousand" and so on. Each has managed to adapt in unusual and unexpectedly triumphant ways to the "new world order" that the "harmless" bloodsuckers are hypnotically trying to persuade people to adapt to. I love the duality of agnes/perdita as well as her male counterpart in the "quite reverend mightly" oats..and of course the other splendidly strange cast of characters! If this review seems more of a tease then a help to all, that because in my opinion, there is no substitute for BUYING THIS BOOK. And if u happen to be reading this book in a public spot be sure to find a somewhat sparcely populated area in the back else u're sure 2 catch some interesting glances as u laugh your way from cover to cover....

Another Pratchett book arrives with another inexpressive american cover! Pratchett's current american publisher has a penchant for abstract, crudely rendered covers most inferior to the lively, baroque cartoons used on the original english editions. (Pratchett's old american publisher, NAL, often substituted american cartoons for english, but at least they kept up with the spirit of the thing.)Is the work of Josh Kirby and other british artists being kept off american covers by some copyright convention fluke, or just the poor taste of Pratchett's american publishers?

I give the book 4 stars (probably 3.75) because of putting the witches through a new theme - vampires invading Lancre! This makes for a refreshing story in the Discworld series to date. However, the witches are still the same characters (of course), so the type of jokes and their behavior is nothing really new.

Overall, another great adventure. I guess you can only do so much with the same characters though.

I really like all of Terry Pratchett's Discworld (fantasy) books, including this one. You will best enjoy reading them in the order published, but they're good on their own. They have a unique, fey humor: I expect you will like all or none, so if they're new to you, get just one to begin with.

Even if you have read this book (or any/all of Pratchett's books) before, you will find yourself riveted to this "instant" classic. From witches and vampires, to young love ., Pratchett spins another irreverent fable guaranteed to make you think--about what is up to you.

Carpe Jugulum may be the worst Discworld book out there because of the large amount of recycled material in it. It reads like a rewrite of Lords And Ladies, a vastly superior book. To summarize the plot, a new and seemingly unstoppable group of non-Human outsiders threatens the mountain kingdom of Lancre. It is up to the local witches to repel the invaders. In the process, Granny Weatherwax must overcome a confidence crisis to defeat a seemingly unstoppable enemy. Change the phoenix to a unicorn and the vampires to elves and you've got Lords And Ladies. It's not even that big a change. Like the younger vampyres, the elves are keen on glamour and refuse to see people as more than objects. Unlike the elves, whom Pratchett portrayed in a fresh light, the vampires are simply straightforward parodies of classic Hollywood and Goth vampire cliches. The straightforward approach prevents them from being effective as villains. Only vaguely imposing and frightening, the vampires come across more silly than monstrous.
However, the book never rises to the standards set by books like Small Gods and Reaper Man. Character development is virtually abandoned in favor of undoing past changes. Nanny Ogg never really goes anywhere and seems forever destined to be Granny's sidekick. Magrat finally gets to show a little personality, but is largely superfluous. The Agnes/Perdita relationship is never really explained. Even Granny comes across flat compared to Pratchett's marvelous portrayal of her in Lords And Ladies as a tragic hero.
To be fair, the book has some great moments. The Igors are introduced in this book and the family Igor is used to good effect. The Nac mac Feegle - a cross between Scottish Highland cliches and the Smurfs - are brilliant and provide the funniest moments in the book by far. Still, these are largely diversions and can't quite differentiate the book from other Prathcett novels. Simply put, read Lords And Ladies instead. The plot is more gripping (and more original), the character development is far superior, and the comedy is much better realized.

This book is a MUST for all who love Pratchett and/or vampires, especially for those who loved the philosophical talking in Small Gods. If you ask me, maybe just a little too much philosophical talking as Granny and Mightily Oats the Omnian Priest hasten though the mountains, but the Vampire's are lovely: Meet young Vlad and forget you ever dreamt of Lestrade ... Lestat ... whatever his name may have been, he doesn't matter any more. These are simply the best vampires I've ever met, and I must know, since I am one myself (well, at least part-time).

Okay, okay, okay. I have just looked at everyone else's review and I totally disagree. I don't know why they didn't like this book. It was the first Discworld novel I had read and I really think this is one of my all-time favorites. It ranks up there with "Split Heirs" (which, by the way, anyone in their right mind will like). I know I haven't read many Discworld novels, but I think it's an original story and extremely hilarious. Maybe this review will be helpful to people who haven't read many of Pratchett's books, like me...or to people who HAVE read quite a few of his books, but aren't too judgmental or critical. I thought it was an enjoyable read for a relaxing evening. If you're still skeptical, then do what I do instead of spending sooooooo much money for book. GO TO THE LIBRARY! Yup. Just try it out--or should I say check it out (ha ha...no pun intended). Have a good read, people!

As the title suggests, this book contains vampyres. They are not your typical vampire, but nothing about Pratchett's characters are ever typical. The King, in his efforts to be modern, has invited vampires to Lancre and Granny Weatherwax has to take them down. You'll laugh, you'll cry. I love the witches and want to be Esmerelda Weatherwax when I grow up.

Anyone familiar with TP's books knows that, especially with the Witches books, Pratchett is developing beyond a simple humor writer into more well-rounded modes. Carpe Jugulum represents part of that shift, as it is both a very funny take on vampires, *and* a more serious tale about nature and reality and rebirth. Defiently recommended!

Terry Pratchett is one of the most interesting authors that I have had the pleasure of reading in a long time. He is so clever in the way his fictitious world parallels our own. He leaves me in stitches in some places and thoughtful in others. I have read almost all of his books and all have been delightful.

... and an unfortunate result is that he sometimes fails to meet them. Although this book would be considered the pinnacle of success for lesser scribes, we know what Pratchett is capable of, and this isn't it. Unlike most of his works, this one didn't even tempt me to reread it once. Lords and Ladies was not one of the top five either, but redeemed itself with the Shakespeare connection. This rewritten version of L&L doesn't quite pull it together. A few concepts are introduced which receive better treatment later. Pratchett seems to be experimenting with the neo-vampiric theme here, but handles it much better in "The Truth." All in all, some good concepts that didn't form into a book.

I picked this up in a European airport, thinking it was going to be a quick silly read, like Tom Sharpe. It's nothing like, but I wasn't disappointed. My only caveat: start earlier in the Discworld series - starting here made for a confusing beginning and the uncomfortable sense that I was missing stuff.

I've read about half of Discworld now, and this is easily the weakest one. I'd almost say "it sucks" but shan't stoop to such a deplorable pun.

The plot seemed a rehash of Lords & Ladies, just swap vampires for elves and take out the Shakespeare homage. Worse, key elements of the plot, such as how Granny's "borrowing" works, are at direct odds with the rest of the series and cause a gaping plot hole [I'd elaborate on that except it's a HUGE spoiler.] Much of the plot requires "willful stupidity" on the part of the villains, which struck me as very contrived. The ending itself was unsatisfying, though perhaps Pratchett is planning on picking this up at some time in the future.

There are no laugh-out-loud moments to be found, and even the chuckles are few and far between. The closest to social insight is one of the characters' questioning his faith, and even that is dealt with better in Small Gods.

If you've never read any Discworld books before, don't start here, and in fact you can probably just skip this entry alltogether and still enjoy the rest of the series. If you do like Pratchett, well, still skip it, unless you have a soft spot for the Lancre witches arc or are a real vampire fanatic. Even then, keep your expectations low, so they won't be dashed like mine were. You have been warned.

Pratchett has repeatedly shown he can do better than this.

I simply loved it! Since I bought it I already read the books several times just in case I missed some jokes - and indeed I did... not just once. Whoever likes Vampyres - either old-fashioned or modern - is going to love this book. I especially got to like the witches who I did not favour more than any other character before this book. Agnes prooves that she is more than just "the one that poures the tea" and Nanny that she can be an "old crow". From the first line on I never got bored or could lay the book aside. It's sparkling of wit and creativity. Hilarious!

The villains are a family of vampires, who move in and take over Lancre and its royal family, while Granny Weatherwax and the other witches try to stop them (and eventually succeed, of course). As my wife says, it just seems like a rehash of Lords and Ladies.

I love every book by terry pratchett, seems like he really knows how to tell a story. but every story about the witches and especially Granny Weatherwax goes even beyond his story telling capabilities, this story and it's vampires are so alive that it's frightening. read this book everyone and you won't be dissapointed

Any of the witches books seem to be a hit for me - Pratchett's skilled use of metaphor and his wicked insights in the contemporary world are woven into a rich tapestry of fun filled fancy! Loved the allegory* relating to sacrifice that was played out by Granny Weatherwax.
* Al. E. Gory was once a politician but decided to give it up in favour of a more honest profession as a forger! He wrote stories with optional insight..

Carpe diem - seize the day Carpe jugulum - go for the throat
This story is about how some vampires invaded Lancre after Verence invited them to the castle. The three witches (and the queen) helped to save the day, and guess who did?
Granny Weatherwax!
*scatter applause*
this book is -extraordinary- because of two reasons- its hilarious, like all discworld books, and Granny herself actually admitted to haf a weakness.
learn more about the vampires in this book

I've was introduced to the odd world(s) of Pterry (that is, Terry Prattchett) only months ago... I have devoured his books and loved every one of them... even the ones considered "weak", like one of my favorites, Interesting Times... it could be because Pratchett books are hard to find in Looahvul or just because unlike what some may think, perhaps Pratchett does get better with age...

I'm sorry to say that having realised that the cover art on the US released Pratchett books are not the classic Josh Kirby stuff I'm used to. I will have to buy my Pratchett books here in Australia to keep my colletion looking uniform.

Terry is probably the funniest author alive but this work is not
his triumphs.
Quite frankly it often came over more like Chelsea Quinn Yarbro
than vintage Pratchett. In the first half of the book I could
not tell any difference between what was written and a standard
fantasy. By the time the comedy overcame the tripe this book
was ruined for me. What a shame.

Terry Prattchet always impresses me with his wordskill, but his books about the trio of witches- Nanny Ogg, Granny Weatherwax, and Agnes Nitt- are my favourites. I truely apreciate his contribution to literature and the respect he has brought to fantasy. This book was the final step in putting Prattchet on my list of classic authors.

Once more, Pratchett has used his talent to take us back to Discworld. This time it's the witches of Lancre vs. vampyres. The witches prove once again who's boss, but not without some trouble on the way! A must read.