Tools for Resolving Violated Expectations - Second Edition ( Paperback)

Great second edition with updated model - the skills work anywhere - professional or personal. I give this book and Crucial Conversations to anyone I know graduating from high school or college - wish I'd known all of this when I was that age!

An excellent guide to assist us in holding others accountable for their commitments and behaviours. This conversation is one that many leaders and managers find very difficult. By adding this to our skill set we can greatly increase the performance of our teams and organisations.

This is an incredibly easy-to-read book which was quite eye opening and interesting! I recommend it to anyone who has a good grasp on their own behavior and emotions, but is finding it harder to connect with and organize others. I'm going to try to implement the ideas discussed in the book more and more, but it comes down to values and interests all the time :) I read this as part of a course on Conflict Management, and I find this to fit in nicely with mediator curriculum. Also, as a yogi, this information is perfect as I (a westerner) learns more about spiritual ideas of interacting with people.

lots of good fodder here. the trick is putting it to use. i struggle a bit with the acronyms in the book aimed at helping you, but i fear trying to remember the acronyms versus having a genuine conversation.

This book has some great tools but is very, very poorly organized. The authors bounce around from concept to concept and address the book in a very non-linear manner. Just take a look at the end of chapter summaries and you'll see how the material bounces around. For example, they've got sample questions to diagnose ability 3 chapters after they provide an intro on the topic. One chapter starts by talking about diagnosing the problem but then veers into a completely different topic with no apparent connection.

It's striking because this book offers so much value but yet is so poorly organized that I've literally had to rewrite it in order to make use of it.

This is a great book to deal with tricky issues. Many times, most people view it as EQ or communication style, however it really boils down to how to address the issue of accountability.

This book provides a good framework and method to drill down to the source of the problem and still not step on the toes of others. I highly recommend this book to anyone who needs to lead.

Let's face it. Accountability is always crucial, and this book discusses the topic from a viewpoint that can make accountability conversations part of an ongoing professional dialog in any environment.

Wish I'd read this years ago, when my kids were little. This book is written is a very reader friendly style. There are summaries and bullet points throughout the book for quick reference. The story examples are relevant and interesting.

Listened to this after Crucial Conversation. Great pair and very helpful. I now employ some of these tactics at work and they have been very helpful. Will listen to both again after a few more months to make sure I am refreshing my skills.

One of the best books I've ever read on communicating. I keep it at the side of my bed with sticky notes and my highlighter always learning something new from it. Everyone who thinks they communicate correctly -- is wrong. Read this and learn how to hold people accountable. Your life will thank you.

This book, at its core, structures the tools discussed in Crucial Conversations into solutions for accountability. It also introduces new concepts that help us develop effective methods of accountably instead of simply receiving verbal agreement to "correct" from both parties.

This is one of my all-time favorite books. It has guided me as a leader through challenging situations and even mundane situations, perhaps more than any other book except "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People", of which this book is a worthy descendant.

I love the explanations that were given to explain each concept. It also provided a plethora of examples to support what was discussed. I highly recommend this book. I'll be rereading this one for sure.

This is my new favorite book! For those who love learning about relationships, both in and out of the work place, this book is for you. Easy to read, and I found myself reflecting on different areas of my life I could improve in regard to relationships. Highly recommend it!

If you have already read Crucial Confrontations, then you have read this book.

I thought I was getting some new concepts, but this is really just the 2nd edition of Crucial Confrontations but with a different title. Disappointed.

I found this book to be 50 percent helpful. I suppose some people really do have such poor people skills they do struggle with people. The book is offer tips for people who just do not know how to talk to people period.

I did benefit for from the tips of making the employee feel like you were coming to them and giving them a safe space.

The rest though had me shaking my head. It seems like common sense.

This was a required book for a class I took. It is filled with stories of people who are great problem solvers and why they are good examples, but there are two issues with this book: 1. It's based on data from the 80s (so think about a corporate world ruled by men.....meaning most of the data is based on interviews with white men). 2. This book doesn't talk at all about what it takes for an individual to become a good problem solver. You're not going to read this book and instantly become someone who speaks up, negotiates well, and is able to keep their cool in a contentious situation; why? because that takes behavior change. It requires you to recognize your behavior (when you're upset or even angry), calm down, and deliver a modified response. So how do you do that? Good question....this book will not answer that.

There is also a whole certification that you can get as a "teacher" in this methodology, which is a scam. This is one of those books that gives corporate higher ups buzzwords to throw around without any content behind them. It's great fodder for inspirational speaking, but how do you get egocentric CEOs and their underlings to actually change their behavior? Again, this "system" will not teach you that and what person at the top would actually spend the time required to make those changes?

Subtitled “Tools for Resolving Violated Expectations, Broken Commitments, and Bad Behavior,” this book is the updated version of “Crucial Conversations.” The authors are the leaders of Vitalsmarts, an innovator in best-practices training products and services.

After describing exactly what “crucial accountability” is, the authors start in Part One by having the reader look in the mirror, determining what should be addressed personally before any discussion takes place. Choosing “what” and “if” focuses on what conversation should take place, if any. They encourage you to “master your story,” being sure that your mind is in the right place before you say a word. In other words don’t assume you know what caused anyone to act the way they did! You’re probably wrong!

Part Two focuses on “creating safety,” providing practical advice on how to start an accountability discussion, creating motivation for change, encouraging commitment and staying focused while being flexible in the face of the inevitable “curve balls” that often occur.

Part Three, “Move to Action,” speaks to agreeing to a specific plan, following up, dealing with complicated problems, as well as a great chapter on what they call the “Yeah-Buts” (”I already tried that, and it didn’t work!”).

This extremely practical book closes with a self-assessment for the readers to measure their skills in holding an accountability discussion, as well as presenting diagnostic questions for the author’s “Six Source Model” to assist in understanding why people do what they do (back to Master the Story). The six sources they suggest are 1) Self, Motivate (Pain and Pleasure), 2) Self, Enable (Strengths and Weaknesses), 3)Others, Motivate (Praise and Pressure), 4)Others, Enable (Helps and Hindrances). 5)Things, Motivate (Carrots and Sticks) and 6)Things, Enable (Bridges and Barriers).

The appendix closes with advice on actions to take “When Things Go Right” as well as providing a collection of discussion questions for reading groups.

An exceptional resource for anyone who needs to “have that talk,” whether at home or in the workplace!

Crucial Accountability: Tools for Resolving Violated Expectations,
Broken Commitments, and Bad Behavior, Second Edition by Kerry Patterson,
Joseph Grenny, Ron Mcmillan, Al Switzler and David Maxfield
is an important book on how to define and establish accountability
in a whole host of settings which focus on the workplace. Nonetheless,
many of the strategies contained in the book apply at home too. In fact,
the authors point out that broken promises cause many divorces.

The authors explain many ways to hold people accountable. For instance,
productivity should be benchmarked with milestones. Generally speaking,
the top employees have the knowledge of the inner workings of an
organization to hold others accountable. In brief, workers need to
be aware of the gist of infractions, patterns of non-performance and
the differential impact on the relationship quality with peers and the
management.

Employees charged with supervisory responsibilities must be flexible.
Notes on chronic problem areas should be kept so that each issue
can be dealt with methodically. New issues should be introduced when
others have been reviewed thoroughly. There should be a plan for
corrective action and followup. Lastly, gaps between expectations and
observations of critical incidents should be set forth so that
measurable goals can be identified and worked on in a logical sequence.

The authors discourage the raw use of power as a motivating factor.
In fact, too much force can cause relationships to deteriorate. Instead,
people in charge should explore the natural consequences of
non-performance with appropriate links to the existing value
systems set forth in the organization or work group. The best managers
usually explore varied solution sets, articulate potential roadblocks
while discussing gaps in accountability and delays in meeting commitments.

Crucial Accountability: Tools for Resolving Violated Expectations,
Broken Commitments, and Bad Behavior by Kerry Patterson, Joseph
Grenny,Ron Mcmillan, Al Switzler and David Maxfield is an important
resource for professionals throughout an organization. The presentation
is well written and easy to understand. The advice is practical
and doable.

Credits: First Published on Blogcritics

This book is excellent in how it helps you drill down and work through accountability conversations that you consider difficult or challenging. I like how the authors describe how to Create Safety. If you can't create safety your conversations are not going to be effective and you're not going to get very far. I also enjoyed reading about how to Describe the Gap between what has been done and what has been or is expected.
The authors talk about how we may be good at some or most of the skills and concepts discussed in the book but we can move to the next level and be better by applying few more skills and increasing our confidence to face accountability issues head on.

Great work and personal examples that will ring with those that read the book.

As other reviewers have mentioned, we tend to pass judgment very quickly before we have even heard from the person to find out why they haven't done what they promised or said they would do. Master My Stories chapter is awesome! Great chapter that has you look at the stories you have created in your mind and evaluate BEFORE you even open your mouth to speak. I would highly recommend this book!

In a season of continued and extravagant unmet expectations in the commercial, government, and non-profit(ministry) employment sectors, this book is ON TIME! The ability to apply the principles using the examples given is amazing! You may have heard some of the precepts before, but did you truly and honestly "Get it" or apply them across different areas your daily life? This book allows you to hit the ground running in addressing these 3 issues.

Quite good. I ordered the book because I had difficulty speaking up about the behavior of someone at work. Then small problems turned to bigger problems and I was asked at work why I did not speak up the first time. Well, personally who like a tattle tale right? Hard call. Sometimes something can be resolved one on one with rational people. Most coworkers are. When I was stuck in what seemed to be a cycle I knew I needed to report it. In my report, I found myself back - peddling to the initial incedent. So I got this book to help me along. I am happy with it. It involves personal and professional accountability so it is a useful tool book for personal and professional issues we need to confront.

Great addition to the skills taught in Crucial Conversations. I loved how Crucial Conversations had examples of how to hold an important conversation that might be difficult but Crucial Accountability really helps in showing what often comes next: the awkward conversation when the person who committed to do something ends up not following through on his or her actions. I personally have a harder time holding another person accountable than I do having an honest conversation so this book was gold for me.

whether you're trying to get your kids to keep commitments or get your team to hit their deadlines, these skills are awesome. they are really tangible. you can read one chapter and go use the skill immediately. I tend to go to "silence" when I should speak up to people who don't keep promises, but I realized it only further damages the relationship and widen rifts between us. This provides a nice framework for how to have that conversations AND improve the relationship.

Why are more people not disappointed with this book. The authors retitled the Crucial Confrontations book. I understand that it would be helpful to read it again but I already own Crucial Confrontations. I would have much rather purchased a book I haven't read. Very disappointed in the authors on this one. Shame on you guys. :(

Why are more people not disappointed with this book. The authors retitled the Crucial Confrontations book. I understand that it would be helpful to read it again but I already own Crucial Confrontations. I would have much rather purchased a book I haven't read. Very disappointed in the authors on this one. Shame on you guys. :(