The One Word That Changes Everything for Your Marriage

What an excellent book! Any marriage would benefit from reading and applying the information presented here. Gary Thomas is a very gifted writer who explains ideas in ways that make it easy to apply to your life. I had tears in my eyes often as I read this book. I did have moments of wanting to wallow in self-pity as Gary said that no spouse should feel invisible in a marriage. But, he does such a good job of giving examples from so many situations and viewpoints that I was quickly reminded (in case I didn't quickly remind myself) of areas or times when I have a lot of room for improvement. I have read A LOT of marriage books, but this one would rank up there with one of the best and most helpful (along with Gary's book Sacred Marriage). Now- if I could only get my husband to read it too :). I can't recommend this book highly enough.

Gary Thomas assures us that what we believed on our wedding day is so! Contentment, enjoyment, happiness and intimacy in your marriage! Cherish is a choice! Do you want to be cherished? Be cherishable!

One of the best marriage books out there. If people would follow the advice in this book marriages all over would be healed. A great read no matter where you are in your journey, newly married or married for 40 years.

Inspiring and marriage changing! It's easy to promise in wedding vows to love and to cherish, but Cherish means being intentional over time. This is a joyful and practical game-changer. Love this book!

Author of the best marriage books I’ve ever read, Gary Thomas succeeds again in directing hearts and minds, teaching men and women to see their spouses as “my Eve/my Adam”, and showcasing what delight and honor can do in a marriage.

Like a marriage coach, Gary focuses us on the goal, a beautiful marriage where not just love but also cherish abounds, shows us the steps to get there, with wise counsel and personal stories, and encourages and cheers for us.

What a transformation could occur in our world if couples chose to cherish one another! Choose to cherish your spouse and consider reading Cherish: The One Word That Changes Everything for Your Marriage! I’ll be getting copies to share.

This book was helpful but lacks a certain power. It wasn't until the last chapter where the gospel takes front and center stage. Too bad more of the book wasn't filled with the last chapter. Please understand the rest of the book was helpful with stories and the author's insights but the strength of the message could have struck me as lightening if more Scripture was expounded and less psychology employed. It's always the sword of the Spirit that pierces more deeply than a statistic or an opinion from some psychological study. Don't miss understand those things can prove insightful and provide good observation but they lack the weight and gravity to move and convict a man's soul or heart. In this case to stir my heart to cherish my wife the way the last chapter did when I was reminded and confronted with the gospel!

There are nuggets of gold to be mined throughout the book. For example, the author writes about defining our marriages, "Biblical marriage is about defining each other as Christ defines us-" Yes, amen! You will find such nuggets of gospel truth scattered throughout this book but not saturated with it.

In chapter 2 the author encourages us to make our wives our "Eve." The only woman in our world. "Our wives aren't just our first choice, but our only choice," and "Cherishing is about learning to hold our spouses dear, and this takes vigilance. It takes practice. But when it arrives-when your wife is Eve and there is no other-you will feel like the most blessed husband alive. Your wife will feel cherished because your adoration will be as genuine as the beginning of time." Great admonishment!! But in chapter 5 he ironically mocks a man who does what he suggests. The author, in trying to prove the point of how a man who thought his wife gorgeous even when others didn't (including the author) undermines his admonition in chapter 2! Here's what he writes.... "The man’s “gorgeous” wife walked up a few minutes later. Not wanting to be unkind, all I can say is that she looked rather like a “before” picture of a glamour shoot. Except for her teeth, her hair, her grooming, and the asymmetrical set of her eyes, I’m sure she’d be stunning." I found this illustration poor in taste, especially for a pastor! He eclipsed his message in chapter 2 with a distasteful example. Shame on the editors and shame on the author/pastor for a terrible and unseemly illustration. In heaven the author will owe the brother an apology but especially his wife.

In essence I would recommend the book but place a disclaimer with the above information. Mine out the gold leave the chafe behind. Study the gospel of how God in Christ has cherished us and go in the power of His grace and do likewise to your spouse. In doing so your marriage will glorify the King as the gospel is lived out in your marriage. Cherish away as you have been cherished by the Savior.

Incredible. I had planned to complete this book over a month with my wife. After less than a week I'm done with it. And today I plan to start it again to write notecards for quick review. The content is incredible and I'm already applying it. My wife and I are studying with a small group and we plan to tackle the video/workbook study with the group.

I read every book Mr. Thomas writes about marriage, and I highly recommend this book. I can't tell you how many "wow" moments I've had, nor how many insights I've gained from his books, way too many to count! This latest book of his, "Cherish", will teach husbands and wives how to do just that: cherish their spouses. Everything I've put into practice that I've learned from his books has not only blessed my husband, but has blessed me, improving our lives and marriage immeasurably.

A Marriage Changer
Another GREAT book by Gary Thomas! It truly can change your marriage from duty to DELIGHT!! Very balanced for husband and wife and very practical. We plan to buy more for gifts and hope to do the DVD group study as a class soon. We are marriage coaches and mentors and this will for sure be part of our resources.

Thomas has brought out crucial points in this book that had not occurred to me; I feel cherished by my husband but didn't realize he should feel cherished by me as well! (I have made it a priority that he feel loved, however!) The information gleaned from this book that I've implemented have already made a difference in our marriage. Thank you, Pastor Thomas!

Excellent book on marriage. I have finished the book just recently and my husband has agreed to read it through with me. Looking forward to that since every effort towards having an excellent marriage is worth it!

Thomas tells wives that they are to be patient with their husband when he finds it difficult to resist indulging in adultery by repeatedly looking (and doing 'other' things along with it) at multiple other women's naked/nude bodies, i.e. habitually indulging in pornography. The BIBLE teaches in many places a NO tolerance for ANY sexual immorality! So Gary Thomas is teaching the opposite of what the Bible says about this. It also shows how blatantly and willfully ignorant he is to the whole highly destructive world of sex addiction. Thomas would do well to read all 3 of Dr. Milton Magness books on sex addiction. IF Thomas bothered to educate himself, he would see how horrendously dangerous it is to have written such a stupid thing to wives to be patient while her husband destroys her, their children, himself, and others around him via his indulging in repeatedly viewing pornography. There is NO being patient, there is ONLY "cold turkey" quitting and immediately getting into a permanent and highly structured recovery program as Dr. Milton Magness does such a great job in laying out.

Twenty-two years. Almost twenty-three. We've weathered career changes, parenting, illnesses, caregiving, and the death of parents. We are committed, but our marriage could certainly use refreshing. We're in the midst of potty training and homeschooling, while also planning graduations, driving lessons, college applications, bridal showers, and summer weddings. Life is perpetually busy and our marriage often ends up neglected.

I know we aren't alone in this struggle. Every couple faces the challenge of maintaining a strong and loving relationship despite busy schedules. The answer doesn't necessarily lie in weekly date nights or counseling sessions. It lies in learning to not only love your spouse, but cherish them. (Yes, it goes both directions.)

Gary Thomas helps couples understand how to truly cherish each other and live that out in his book, Cherish. Each chapter focuses on a different aspect of cherishing our spouse, as well as giving real-world examples from couples he knows, including his own marriage. What does cherishing look like? Not comparing your spouse to others, listening with your eyes and ears, speaking gentle words of love and appreciation, supporting your spouse so they can shine.

Nothing that I read in Cherish was exactly new to me. I know this is how God desires that we treat our spouse, but it's so easy to forget, to become lazy or selfish, and to take our spouse for granted. I needed this reminder to love my husband with a Christ-like love and to help him feel cherished. I can love him, respect him and be thankful for him, but if I don't express that to him, he won't feel cherished.

Whether you've been married a few short months, or nearly twenty-three years, you can benefit from reading Cherish and applying it to your marriage. It's never too early or too late to begin to cherish your spouse.

This book was given to me in order to review it. These thoughts are my own and no other compensation was received.

Wood stoves do not render their comforting warmth without regular tending. Fires must be coaxed along with frequent ministrations, and I never give this much thought — unless my good husband is away, for he miraculously tends to this important detail, and our house stays cozy and warm. Similarly, since the beginning of our marriage, he has changed the oil in our vehicles, paid our bills, balanced the checkbook, and locked the doors every night, leaving me with the delightful sense of being safe, cared for: cherished.

Gary Thomas writes that this variety of practical love is reassuring to me because it demonstrates that our life together is a priority that is worthy of my good husband’s time and effort. Now, with his one-word title, Cherish, he challenges readers to go beyond merely loving our spouses and to live our way into a “marriage that feels more precious, more connected, and more satisfying.”

Many marriage vows include a promise to “cherish,” but do we understand what that looks like from the perspective of our spouse, the cherished one? Gary unpacks the concept in terms of learned behaviors that can change everything in a marriage:

Cherishing means learning to hold someone dear.

The Message to the Cherished: “You don’t have to be anyone other than who you are.”

When we allow our spouse to define “beauty” (or “handsome-ness”) in our minds, we have begun to rewind history to Eden when each was the “only one” in the world to the other. Choosing anew every day the one you chose on your wedding day is the antidote to disappointment, discontentment, and critical comparing.

Cherishing means learning to showcase your spouse.

The Message to the Cherished: “How can I support you today? How can I make your day better?”

For the believer, this includes enhancing one another’s ministry opportunities. We want our beloved to shine! It is based upon the assumption that we have ended the love affair with ourselves. Gary uses the vivid example of a male ballet dancer rejoicing in the standing ovation a ballerina receives because he has “supported, tossed, caught, turned, and showcased” her. It’s all about helping your spouse to realize his/her potential in the world.

Cherishing means noticing and honoring each other.

The Message to the Cherished: “I will put your needs above everything else.”

Here’s the truth in a nutshell: “You can honor someone without cherishing them, but you can’t cherish someone without honoring them.” Wives will feel noticed if their words are taken seriously; husbands are looking for physical affection. For either gender, we honor our spouses when we take an active interest in what interests them.

Cherishing is about protecting each other and killing contempt.

The Message to the Cherished: “When I scan you, I will be looking for something to praise – not to criticize.”

Gary traces the tragic journey from newlywed infatuation through disappointment, frustration, and bitterness to contempt, which is the single biggest threat to a marriage’s survival and happiness. Practicing fierce gratitude is the antidote to contempt.

Cherishing teaches us to indulge our spouses and, thus, to help heal their spiritual wounds.

The Message to the Cherished: “I am committed to your healing and wholeness.”

When we nurture our spouse, we provide a picture of God’s cherishing heart. We make our spouse’s needs a priority and work to discover what actions we can take to help them address their weaknesses and to breathe life into them every day.

Cherishing teaches us to carefully and deliberately use our ears and our words to express our affection.

The Message to the Cherished: “I will be deliberate and specific in verbal affirmation and mirror God’s acceptance and affirmation in my words and in my tone.”

This may not come naturally, but developing (and maintaining) a curiosity toward our spouse’s words and activities communicates value. Deitrich Bonhoeffer sums this up beautifully:

“Just as love to God began with listening to His Word, so the beginning of love for the brethren is learning to listen to them.”
Even unintentional verbal slights can be devastating to a marriage.

Cherishing is about treating our spouse as a unique individual.

The Message to the Cherished: “I will help you complete your one-of-a-kind story.”

It’s time to cast aside generalizations and stereotypical assumptions about what “all men” or “all women” do. Understanding bypasses judgment and empathizes while genuinely investing the effort to understand and to accept.

Cherishing means being patient with your spouse’s sins.

The Message to the Cherished: “We both stumble in many ways. I will thank God for you, and, together, we will grow in holiness.”

Gary offers six words that can save the day: “This is how your spouse stumbles.” Accepting that your spouse will never be perfect makes allowance for imperfection without diminishing our appreciation. Apart from this, it is impossible to maintain “a cherishing attitude.” Furthermore, it is counterproductive to think, “I could cherish them if only they wouldn’t do x, y, or z.” “Half of holiness centers around being patient with other peoples’ sins.”

As he did in Sacred Marriage, Gary Thomas has melded practical theology and behavioral principles to encourage believers along in a life that goes beyond the mere fulfillment of marriage vows. Just as my wood stove responds to regular tending by yielding comfort and warmth to my home, a cherishing mindset that is deeply rooted in the Gospel truth that we are continually cherished by God will result in a marriage that radiates a lifetime of warmth and love.

//

This book was provided by Zondervan through the BookLookBloggers program in exchange for my review. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

The definition of cherish is to "protect and care for (someone) lovingly, to hold something dear". When applied to marriage, this goes beyond merely committing to your spouse - it means making him/her feel special.

I've been married for almost 17 years and recognize the importance of renewing my mind when it comes to how I view my husband and our marriage. I can't say there was any huge revelation that I took away from this book, but it did help me to focus on the truth and align my perspective with God's word. I pray this will help me to cherish my husband more.

For couples who like to read together, each chapter ends with a summary of the main points and a series of discussion questions. Gary Thomas points out that while he shares advice that works for most couples, each person is an individual. Therefore, to get the most out of this book, you should discuss it with your spouse to see how he/she would feel most cherished.

While there are several things I underlined, I always like to share my biggest take-away in my reviews. This one appeared in a chapter about being patient with your spouses's sins. Gary writes, "A holy person isn't known by what he or she does or doesn't watch, by avoiding a few forbidden words, or by attending a frequent number of religious meetings, but by how he or she treats fellow sinners. Our experiential holiness is defined in large part by our ability to gracefully bear the lack of holiness in others. You know you are a spiritually strong person when you can live joyfully and gracefully around spiritually weak people." I had to stop and digest that...We ALL sin and therefore all have spouses that sin. It's how we respond that shows our true maturity. He goes on to write, "There's another way to look at this: if God's attitude toward you in your sin mirrored exactly your attitude toward your spouse in his or her sin, where would you be with God?...Stop comparing your spiritual maturity with your spouse's; instead, start comparing your spiritual maturity with Ephesians 4:1-3. If you do that, you will change the climate of your marriage."

This is only one of the many ways we can learn to cherish our spouses. I challenge you to read this book and learn about the others.

*I received a complimentary copy of this book from BookLook Bloggers in exchange for an honest review.

The word cherish not in our daily vocabulary. In fact, I have probably used it in reference to someone’s name more in the past five years than I have in its verb form (I know a couple of women named Cherish). One of the things that I do not like about our current generation is that we seem to have a limited vocabulary. Thankfully though, Cherish by Gary Thomas is not about our limited vocabulary and an attempt to expand it, but rather it is a guide for us to cherish our spouse.

The word is used in a lot of wedding vows, but I do not think that we often think about what it actually means. We ought to cherish our spouse. We should make them feel like they are the only one in the world for us, because they are. We need to recognize our own flaws when it comes to our relationship and work to better them. At least with authors like Thomas, we do not have to go far before we can gain wisdom that we can apply to our life.

I am sure that Thomas does not believe that he holds all of the answers, but I am confident that he holds quite a few. Marriages would be better if we were to read and apply his writings. They are not as much of a self-help book as they are ones that are filled with truth in Christ that can be used to make our marriages better. If you have found yourself in a marriage, now is the time to make it the best it can be.

I received this book for free in exchange for an unbiased review. The words above are my own and have not been influenced in any way by the author or published except for the written manuscript.

Cherish. A word spoken and vowed, but oft overlooked and forgotten. Though it's a small word, it can make a world of difference in transforming a marriage.

I was very intrigued by the title of this book, and after I read the description I knew that I had to read it. I had previously read Mr. Thomas's book, Sacred Search, which is one of my favorite relational books that I have read, so I had high hopes for this book and it did not disappoint. I love how Mr. Thomas uses stories from his own marriage, and that of people that he knows to show Cherish in action, as well as how he deftly points to the gospel throughout.

This would be a great book for people to read before marriage, as well as anyone who is married, because I don't think it would ever be bad to learn of more ways to cherish and understand your spouse. I loved the way that Mr. Thomas talks about the different aspects of cherishing someone, from forsaking all others, and learning to treasure your spouse in the ways that make them who they are, to accepting their stumblings, learning their love language and loving them how they desire to be cherished, and how to encourage them for Christ and eternity.

I'm not married, but I immensely enjoyed this book, it was comprehensive, conversational, and concise. And even though I do not have a spouse, I thought that this book was very edifying nonetheless, and even though I know that it was not the direct aim of the book, it led me to think of how I treat other Christians and people in day to day life in light of the gospel. This book has a strong biblical foundation, and I loved how it was continually pointing readers to the cross of Christ, and how that should change how we treat others, most especially a spouse.

Overall, a fantastic read, and despite not being married, I found that I got so much out of it, and would recommend others like me to read it as well. I will definitely be revisiting this book again and again over the years.

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received one or more of the products or services mentioned above for free in the hope that I would mention it on my blog. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255: "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and testimonials in Advertising."

"Cherish - The one word that changes everything for your marriage."

Bold title ... Bold promise ... The back of the book has two sentences that caught my attention -

1- "Every man and woman wants to be cherished by their spouse."

2 - When a husband and wife know they are cherished by their spouse, it brings out the best in both of them."

We make our vows on our wedding day to love and cherish, but I think many of us fall short. We fall into the ease of mundane and we forget to cherish. We love, but we forget to cherish. We forget to make each day another day to show our spouse that we cherish them, that we love them, that they matter.

Get this book and take your marriage to a new place. A new level. And as the back of the book says: "Fill your relationship with new hope and promise. Unleash the power of cherish in your marriage."

Book Description

“Most marriages survive by gritting teeth and holding on. But marriages can and will not only survive but thrive when husbands and wives learn to cherish one another.”

Those are the powerful words of bestselling author Gary Thomas in his newest book—Cherish. And in a world desperate for marriage redemption, it is needed now more than ever.

Thomas shows that although there are a countless number of marriages consisting of two people just going through the motions, there are real ways this pattern can be reversed: when husbands and wives learn to cherish one another in proven, loving, and everyday actions and words.

Through personal stories and real world examples, Thomas proves what husbands and wives can begin doing today to turn their marriage around—even a marriage marred by neglect and disrespect.

So how do you cherish your spouse? Thomas will show you how going out of your way to notice them, appreciate them, honor them, encourage them, and hold them close to your heart will bring hope, light, and life into your marriage.

Wow.

This book was beautiful and convicting and instructive and thought-provoking. It came at a time in my marriage when I needed to show I cherished my husband and shower him with grace more than any other time in our short 3 years of marriage. It opened my eyes to the things I wasn't doing to show him I cherished him and the things I was doing that did not align with this mission.

This book was a game changer for me and I am so excited for my husband to read it next and to recommend it to other married couples that I know. I got this one from the library, but I will definitely be purchasing it and highlighting and annotating to no end to soak up all the goodness in these pages. I'm also so excited to take a look at some of Gary Thomas's other works, as they are sure to be just as focused on the message of grace and how that plays out in our marriages, parenting and daily lives as this one was.

A must read.

Cherish
Gary L. Thomas

Book Description:
“Most marriages survive by gritting teeth and holding on. But marriages can and will not only survive but thrive when husbands and wives learn to cherish one another.”
Those are the powerful words of bestselling author Gary Thomas in his newest book—Cherish. And in a world desperate for marriage redemption, it is needed now more than ever.
Thomas shows that although there are a countless number of marriages consisting of two people just going through the motions, there are real ways this pattern can be reversed: when husbands and wives learn to cherish one another in proven, loving, and everyday actions and words.
Through personal stories and real world examples, Thomas proves what husbands and wives can begin doing today to turn their marriage around—even a marriage marred by neglect and disrespect.
So how do you cherish your spouse? Thomas will show you how going out of your way to notice them, appreciate them, honor them, encourage them, and hold them close to your heart will bring hope, light, and life into your marriage.
Review:
This book is a marriage book. Before you roll your eyes at the number of Christian marriage books on the market, I will tell you that this one is different. Many marriage books will tell you how to not fight. They will tell you how to communicate and cooperate. They will tell you how to make a tough situation manageable. They will tell you how to make a marriage that lasts.

This book is different. This book teaches how to make a marriage happy. This book gives practical application steps that will help your marriage grow from enduring to enthusiastic. It shows you how to get to the sweet spot of marriage by cherishing your spouse.

It sounds like a cheap word meant for a Valentine’s Day card, but I’ve seen what it looks like. As a pastor’s wife, I get to know a lot of people. I see the difference between a marriage that has endured and a marriage that has thrived. I’ve seen the older couple that still holds hands through the church service, or the wife that leans into the husband during the moment of prayer.

The best example of cherish I’ve seen is a couple in our church that is about to look at hospice care, as cancer takes over. The doctors have no other treatments, and I see this couple still continue to cherish each other. He never leaves her side. He sleeps in a hospital recliner every night. When you go to visit, he expounds on her grace, virtue, and the gift of their life together. More than that, I’ve seen what a life spent cherishing each other has done to their daughter, as she waits on them both. This family truly nurtures each other, they love each other, and they cherish each other. That’s what I want for my family, and I found a way to get there through this book.

Not all books minister to me as this one has. Within a couple of chapters I was lifted up, convicted, and reassured. I read through this book in a few hours, and I plan to read it again and again. Next time, with my husband holding his own copy. Be deliberate about your marriage, be intentional, cherish.

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookLook Bloggers < > book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 < > : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

Gary Thomas notes something rather peculiar: Many wedding vows contain the promise “to love and cherish” our spouse, and many pastors spend quite a bit of time promoting love, but often the concept of cherishing our spouse gets overlooked. Gary is out to correct that in his aptly-titled book “Cherish.”

Learning the value of cherishing our spouse pays enormous benefits. In fact, near the beginning of the book Gary says, “Cultivating a cherishing attitude toward your spouse will elevate your marriage relationally, emotionally, spiritually, and even physically.” That sounds to me like something we would all want in our marriages!

So Gary begins unpacking and defining the idea of marriage in practical terms that any married person (or soon to be married person) can grasp. He uses examples from the first marriage in history between Adam and Eve, shows some of the principles Solomon outlines in his Song of Songs, shines a light on the many passages in the New Testament that address marriage, and even shows the ultimate picture of Jesus cherishing His bride. Throughout all of these, Gary gives us modern-day examples from couples he has known and counseled, and even lessons learned from his own marriage.

Each chapter concludes with some bullet points summarizing the main themes, and some questions to help couples grow in their cherishing of one another.

If you are married, about to be married, or a pastor or counselor who works with married couples, “Cherish” is a book you need to read and be ready to share with others. Such an outstanding read!

SUMMARY:
More than love, “cherish” includes respect, gratitude, honor and adoration. When cherish is combined with love in a marriage, it has the power to change everything within that relationship. In his new book, Cherish, author Gary Thomas explores and shares the positive effect cherishing another person can have. With a faith-based backdrop, the word cherish is applied to many aspects within a marriage, abundantly coupled with personal stories, relevant analogies, beautiful words, ideas and actions, as well as lots of compassion and encouragement.
A PENNY FOR MY THOUGHTS:
Reading through the book Cherish, I found it to be a very smooth, interesting read but also one I was constantly shaking my head in agreement with. Trying to read only a few chapters at time so I had time to digest the material; unfortunately, it did not work that way as I was consistently starting the next chapter. Definitely a book for any stage of marriage, it would be perfect for a counseling session, pre-marriage workshop, a marriage ministry or even a sermon topic.
RATING:
5 (out of 5) pennies
*I received a complimentary copy of Cherish from BookLook Bloggers for my honest review*

I was blown away by Sacred Marriage in the perspective that Gary Thomas had on marriage. What if marriage isn't supposed to make you happy but holy? Yes, I was looking at marriage the wrong way. I thought that if I wasn't happy then something was wrong with my marriage.

NOW we have the book of HOW to get a happy marriage. My husband and I have been trying to figure out that missing piece and I truly feel like this is it. As I read this book I wanted to highlight so many things to point out for my husband for when he reads it because it really hit home! Both of us came from families that didn't have parents that showed affection, but criticism. We remember a time when we had that "giddy up" in our step. This book really showed us how to get that feeling back and what a happy marriage is supposed to look like.

I received a digital advance review copy of Gary Thomas' latest gem, "Cherish." His heartfelt, God-fearing words shine in his newest volume -- and it belongs in EVERY church and home library. It's like a relationship reference book chock-full of biblical examples and verses working hand-in-hand with positive and negative real-life examples of how others have cherished (or haven't cherished) their spouses. The lessons presented sure hit home!

It's easy enough to read through this book in a few hours, and the points of every chapter are graciously summarized at each chapter's end. However, it's heavy enough that you'll want to go back and ponder the questions presented at the end of the chapters, too.

What was my favorite example of how to correctly cherish a spouse? I was intrigued with the example of how God cherished Jerusalem (his bride) even when no one else wanted her (and how she flourished under that positive attention -- even with the hefty burden of a miserable 'childhood'). It's had my brain on overload (in a good way)!

Pick up a copy as an anniversary or wedding gift... Or, better yet, consider encouraging your older children to read it before they even date so they know what a Godly marriage is truly about and how to strengthen marital bonds from the get-go!

Cherish. What a great word! Wouldn't we all loved to be cherished in our marriages? Gary Thomas took that one little word and wrote a whole book about it: what it means to cherish, how to actually cherish your spouse, and even how to make yourself more cherish-able (is that a word?). There is a ton of practical information in this book that will help you improve your marriage -- that is, if you follow his advice.

I have read a couple of books by Gary Thomas, and when I had the chance to review this one, I jumped at it. His books are always filled with great information pertaining to marriage. And who's marriage can't use at least a little improvement? :) I loved this book with its advice for cherishing one's spouse, and I can't recommend it enough!

I want to thank BookLook Bloggers for my review copy of this book, but my opinions are my own.

I find it difficult to find the words to describe this book in a short review!
It is an excellent book with exceptional teaching, many helpful tips and advice on having a better marriage.
It's about the act of cherishing your spouse; learning to appreciate him or her for who they have been created to be; helping them become the best they can be.
It's about building them up, encouraging, and of course, cherishing.
Another crucial part of being in a cherishing marriage is being a person that is easy to be cherished. And allowing your spouse to cherish you.
This is one of those books that needs to be re-read, just to better comprehend everything that is shared in its pages.

When I was given the opportunity to read an advanced digital copy of this book, I jumped at the chance to do so as I have read four of his other books (Sacred Marriage, Sacred Influence, Every Body Matters, Sacred Search), and my marriage has been blessed because of them! My teenage daughter is currently reading The Sacred Search (a fabulous book about choosing a spouse) and loving it! Needless to say, Gary Thomas is a household name here and for a very good reason - gentle directness.

As Gary Thomas noted, cherish is part of our wedding vows and yet it is a word that is not focused on or perhaps even well understood. However, as the subtitle states, it is the one word that can change your marriage! While reading the book I was, enlightened, affirmed, encouraged, challenged, and even admonished regarding my level of cherishing in my marriage and am thankful for the opportunity to apply what I have read to bring my marriage to a new level. I also began to reflect on how you can carry cherish into all areas of your life and by doing so enrich them as well.

Some of my favorite quotes include: "you can love someone and not cherish them, but you can't cherish them and not love them", "love and cherish never compete - they compliment and even complete each other", and "cherish" is like being the male ballet dancer who is grateful to help the prima ballerina shine more brightly than if she were just dancing on her own and being glad to play that supportive role".

I will definitely be buying a hard copy of his book and re-reading it with a highlighter in hand. It is full of powerful words that can dramatically change any relationship, especially your marriage. And for Christian couples, Gary's mandate is beautifully put: "Cherish is a simple formula but a powerful one: preach the gospel to yourself and then live out the gospel. That is the power to cherish - believing and receiving the gospel in which we are cherished beyond all measure and then living out the implications to cherish each other". Thank you Gary for another God breathed book!!

Cherish. What a great word! Wouldn't we all loved to be cherished in our marriages? Gary Thomas took that one little word and wrote a whole book about it: what it means to cherish, how to actually cherish your spouse, and even how to make yourself more cherish-able (is that a word?). There is a ton of practical information in this book that will help you improve your marriage -- that is, if you follow his advice.

I have read a couple of books by Gary Thomas, and when I had the chance to review this one, I jumped at it. His books are always filled with great information pertaining to marriage. And who's marriage can't use at least a little improvement? :) I loved this book with its advice for cherishing one's spouse, and I can't recommend it enough!

I want to thank BookLook Bloggers for my review copy of this book, but my opinions are my own.

I find it difficult to find the words to describe this book in a short review!
It is an excellent book with exceptional teaching, many helpful tips and advice on having a better marriage.
It's about the act of cherishing your spouse; learning to appreciate him or her for who they have been created to be; helping them become the best they can be.
It's about building them up, encouraging, and of course, cherishing.
Another crucial part of being in a cherishing marriage is being a person that is easy to be cherished. And allowing your spouse to cherish you.
This is one of those books that needs to be re-read, just to better comprehend everything that is shared in its pages.

When I was given the opportunity to read an advanced digital copy of this book, I jumped at the chance to do so as I have read four of his other books (Sacred Marriage, Sacred Influence, Every Body Matters, Sacred Search), and my marriage has been blessed because of them! My teenage daughter is currently reading The Sacred Search (a fabulous book about choosing a spouse) and loving it! Needless to say, Gary Thomas is a household name here and for a very good reason - gentle directness.

As Gary Thomas noted, cherish is part of our wedding vows and yet it is a word that is not focused on or perhaps even well understood. However, as the subtitle states, it is the one word that can change your marriage! While reading the book I was, enlightened, affirmed, encouraged, challenged, and even admonished regarding my level of cherishing in my marriage and am thankful for the opportunity to apply what I have read to bring my marriage to a new level. I also began to reflect on how you can carry cherish into all areas of your life and by doing so enrich them as well.

Some of my favorite quotes include: "you can love someone and not cherish them, but you can't cherish them and not love them", "love and cherish never compete - they compliment and even complete each other", and "cherish" is like being the male ballet dancer who is grateful to help the prima ballerina shine more brightly than if she were just dancing on her own and being glad to play that supportive role".

I will definitely be buying a hard copy of his book and re-reading it with a highlighter in hand. It is full of powerful words that can dramatically change any relationship, especially your marriage. And for Christian couples, Gary's mandate is beautifully put: "Cherish is a simple formula but a powerful one: preach the gospel to yourself and then live out the gospel. That is the power to cherish - believing and receiving the gospel in which we are cherished beyond all measure and then living out the implications to cherish each other". Thank you Gary for another God breathed book!!

I haven’t read many books about marriage, but of the few I have read, this is the best, and it’s different.
In their wedding vows, brides and grooms promise to cherish each other. But what does that mean?
Gary Thomas, in his book Cherish: The One Word that Changes Everything for Your Marriage, shows that cherishing means
• Playing second fiddle to our spouses. Be like the man tossing and catching and supporting the ballerina. The ballerina is the only who receives the audience’s ovation—and she’s only in the spotlight because of the male ballerina’s support.
• Treating our spouses as though they are the only man or woman alive. When women view their husbands as Adam and men view their wives as Eve, no other man or woman exists. Our husband or wife is the only man or woman in the world: The image of perfection, with which there is no comparison.
• Indulging our spouses. When a husband is talking, listen: maintain curiosity by asking more questions about the topic. When a wife makes a mistake, treat her gently: speak to her more softly and kindly than you would to anyone else.
I highly recommend this practical, relatable, 13-chapter book. Chapman gives keen ideas and teaches us how to cherish: something we’ve promised to do but maybe haven’t been shown how.
The publisher has provided me with a complimentary copy of this book through BookSneeze®. I was not required to write a positive review.

What if you could?
-turn your marriage from an obligation into a delight
-elevate your marriage relationally, emotionally, spiritually and physically
-empower our spouses to become who they are called by God to be
-cherish an imperfect spouse, even one who has hurt us or disappointed us
-heal some of the wounds we brought into our marriages
-learn to be treated by your spouse as the unique individual you are...
Then discover the power of…CHERISH! This book is a marriage book…a blueprint to changing…yes changing your spouse…through grace given unconditionally, but the principle can be applied to all relationships. Learn to allow the God of the universe to cherish YOU, daily accept His free gift and you will more freely offer love, grace and mercy to everyone in your relationship circle. Rather than being annoyed, judgmental or critical you will see your spouse and others in a whole new light. Gary Thomas has authored a gem in Cherish! Learn the key to being cherished and in turn how that leads to our ability to cherish others.

Cherish is a wonderful marriage book for BOTH husbands and wives!
Each chapter challenges men and women in their treatment of one another. There can be so many perceived hindrances to cherishing our spouse, but there's no excuse to treating God's child like the cherished person they are.
One of my favorite chapters is "A Bride Made Beautiful". Gary goes into a description of just how precious His "bride" is and how He can redeem and CHERISH any person back into lovely.

Gary L. Thomas is already one of my favorite authors. He hits it out the park with Cherish also!
I recommend it (and I totally recommend purchasing the physical copy and have your pen and highlighter in hand!!)

Wayne M

Sacred marriage and sacred parenting were formative books for me, which I have often recommended to others. I will admit to not keeping up with many of Gary’s other writings over the intervening years except reconnecting with him occasionally on Twitter and more recently through his blog posts.

Over the last few months I have particularly enjoyed Gary’s blog posts and the announcement of this new book Cherish, I began to anticipate with growing interest. I have to state here that I was given a free prepublication pdf copy to enjoy and to review.

Gary’s style of writing is simple, straightforward, engaging and most importantly thought provoking. Whilst the production of the book is clearly for the American market, which makes the chapters shorter. Therefore you do not get that tedious feeling of ploughing through the material, even when it s excellent, that is so common from UK publishers.

Now the concept of cherishing ones spouse is not only for Americans, but also rather for all of us who are married wherever we happen to live. In fact it would apply to all of our relationships, why just stop at marriage, but since marriage is the most important and most intimate of those relationships, it should definitely begin there.

The practical examples, the chapter summaries and the questions for discussion and reflection are worth their weight in gold. I found this cherishing concept at first intriguing and then very convicting, as you progress through the book, I kept meeting instances in my own nearly twenty years of marriage experience that were highly enlightening to me personally.

It brought out a number of instances where I had failed as a husband and I wasn’t even in the slightest aware of it. Sadly it also highlighted issues that are current in our relationship that really need the soothe balm of cherish, described by Gary.

For example after having read half of the book I had one of those rare occasions, where I raised my voice to my wife the next day. Normally I would have felt self justified in my annoyance, but on this occasion I very quickly felt convicted by my Behaviour. So shortly a little later I had to take my oldest son out shopping, where I stopped and got my wife some flowers to say sorry. So what I am saying folks is the practical application in the book works. The chapter on cherishing words was certainly written for me.

What’s clear from the book with all of its examples from real marriages is that cherishing is an intentional activity that takes thought and time to pursue. But equally what is also clear from the book that such intention is more than worth the effort.

This is a very rewarding book to read, because its subject matter is intensely positive being other centred. If you only begin to practice some ten- percent of the strategies contained therein your marriage will be rewarded and cherished God willing for many years to come.

I received a digital Advance Review Copy of this book in exchange for an honest review, and I'm so glad I did. Through thoughtful instruction, solid storytelling, and practical examples Gary Thomas has taken one word - "cherish" - and used it to help me be a much better spouse in so many ways. I believe this book will give you a greater heart for your spouse no matter where your marriage currently stands. Marriage is about the small moments as much as it is about the big moments, and Gary shows you how to cherish your spouse in the big AND small ways. This is going to be a life-changing book for some folks, and I know I'll be coming back to it time and again. Thanks for writing this Gary!

We vow to love, honor and cherish, but how quickly do we neglect our spouse in pursuit of our own needs and desires? This book will remind you what it means to cherish your spouse. It will give you practical insights that you can start using today to change the temperature of your marriage. You can love someone without cherishing them, but you cannot cherish someone without loving them. If you have a good marriage, you'll want to read this book. If you have a so-so marriage, you'll want to read this book. If your marriage is hanging on by a thread, you'll want to read this book. No matter how good or how bad your marriage is, the concepts in this book can turn it around and make it stronger ... if you're willing to put them into practice. If you don't read any other book on marriage this year, you'll want to read this one!!

"The way we treat something acknowledges whether we cherish it or hold it with contempt."
"So when we cherish a person, we will put time, thought and effort into honoring, showcasing, and protecting them."

This book came to me in the midst of a season of extreme stress. The way that my husband and I were relating with each other was destructive and nowhere near the story we wanted to be writing for our lives. Reading through Cherish (twice!) gave me a fresh perspective and a chance to take a more hopeful look forward. My husband has historically been the last guy to pick up a marriage book and he's asking for an audio version so he can find out what I've been working on!

I really enjoyed reading Cherish by Gary Thomas. It felt like the perfect (almost sequel?) followup to Sacred Marriage by taking it a step further to study the word cherish that is used in marriage vows. Gary explains thoroughly what cherishing means and how it is differentiated from love. He walks the reader through examples per chapter that breakdown each word that describes what cherishing is: showing off our spouse's best characteristics, protecting our spouse's morals, integrity, and reputation above all things, honoring our spouse's needs and desires and passions above all other things (except God). The examples in each chapter of either how someone cherished or how someone realized they were NOT cherishing and were able to turn their marriages around to a better course when learning to cherish was inspirational. I signed up to pre-read this book before it's release date AFTER I had already pre-ordered it and I cannot wait to read it again so I can highlight to keep for reference. I felt inspired and hopeful. I definitely recommend this book!

Cherish: A Marriage Changer Indeed!

I thoroughly enjoyed and highly recommend Gary Thomas' new book "Cherish." As a young fiance pursuing my wife, I think "cherishing" her came naturally, however this book is a good reminder to me, that even after 30 years of marriage, my wife still desires lots of affection, to feel noticed, pursued and honoured by me and I need to be intentional about those things. I learned that "cherishing" is the emotional glue of a marriage. Gary gives clear ideas about what cherishing is by giving us lots of practical suggestions to build a more loving and cherishing relationship! I particularly liked the suggestion of making lots of memories together with my spouse and cherishing each memory! My wife and I are going to start writing down our "marriage memories" in a journal to look back on in another 30 years!
I also appreciated the summaries at the end of each chapter to highlight the important points of each chapter. Thanks Gary for this helpful and refreshing book that will bring marriages to a new level of love (and some more fun too!)