Before I Go: A Book Club Recommendation!

I found them to be quite satisfactory. I would have made them a couple of inches taller. But all in all they finished off my borders well and made everything look complete. They are strong and sturdy as well as hooked together. I was well pleased with them. This review is for my garden edging not for this book!!!!!!!

While the book is introspective, it was depressing. I kept reading - hoping it would get somewhat lighter. Had I realized the entire story was consumed by such a struggle (albeit it very brave) I would never have started the book. Yes, bad things happen to good people, but I prefer to read for more light-hearted entertainment.

In the beginning of the book I thought it rambled to much, but the more I read the more I thought of , if this was me. I would probably ramble too. The emotional roller coaster she was on was real. The thoughts of her husband's future was real. I laughed and cried and enjoyed it immensely.

The good: Very quick & easy read. Seriously, I was done in a few hours & I have very little time to read. As an in between or on flight book, this will do.
The Bad: Everything else. This story had amazing potential. However, you spend far, far too much time trying to get to know all of the potential wives than you do the main characters. So in the end, I felt zero connection. I wasn't sad. Not a single tear shed. I seriously felt nothing except disappointed for a wasted afternoon.

An easy read but lacks substance. No real story here. I disliked the loose ends and that the main character was self destructive. It's abrupt end left me feeling like the author just wanted to get the story over with. A disappointing read.

Colleen Oakley, in her "before I go," takes what could have been a maudlin topic and created, at least with this reader, an examination of my own mortality. Cancer...the word can strike fear in the bravest of us. For Daisy Richmond, the cancer has returned. Daisy has some options, but they'll perhaps just give her more time but won't save her life. It struck me, as I'm going on this journey with Daisy, that she's wasting precious time through inaction, something best friend Kayleigh forces Daisy to confront. On the one hand, if one has just this limited period of months, then one must, it would seem, try to make the most of them. But as the author allowed me to get to know Daisy, I realized there is such a complexity of feelings one must confront and move through, that, for some time, the heart-wrenching diagnosis almost stops one in his or her tracks. What makes Daisy's plight even more heart-breaking is that she's so young. But cancer doesn't seem to discriminate. Add to this Daisy's fear of leaving husband Jack behind, worried he'll be alone, wanting, then, to find someone with whom he can fall in love after she's gone, and you've got a three-hundred page story that is going to grab you and not let go, even beyond the book's finish. What happens to Daisy (and Jack) could happen to any of us. There are decisions to make, and none of them is easy. Though I'm considerably older than Daisy, I found myself thinking of how I'd deal with leaving my partner behind, what life would be like for him when the life we've shared has to come to an end. That's the strength of the author's writing and the story she tells...It's very difficult to distance oneself as the reader from what is being read. We all die. There are no easy choices. One can only hope that, when the time comes, the right choices have perhaps been made.

It's hard enough to face death when you're older but what if you're a 27 year old young woman and happily married. Daisy has already had breast cancer once and each year on her "Cancerversary" celebrates being cancer free. It's been three years, her husband Jack is about to graduate with a dual doctorate and Daisy finds out the cancer is back and this time it's terminal.

As a cancer survivor myself, I thought the myriad of emotions that Daisy was shown going through was portrayed very well. Two things Daisy wants before she dies:

1. That Jack graduate and she's able to see him do this;
2. She wants to find a replacement wife for Jack before she's gone.

The characters are definitely ones I could identify with. Most of the story is told from Daisy's point-of-view. The book definitely gave me some flashbacks to darker times. But the story isn't too morose even though dealing with a sad subject. It contains humor and grace.

It reminded me of PS, I Love You by Cecelia Ahern, which is a favorite of mine, and definitely of Sunshine by Norma Klein, which I read and cried over when I was a teenager.

Certainly this is a sad story about a young woman dying. But it simply isn't believable that she is diagnosed with "lots of cancer" but is still able to live symptom free. No real depth to the characters and predictable events throughout.

Daisy has been cancer free for more than three years. She's been really conscious about taking care of herself, but it doesn't stop the cancer from coming back. As her four year 'Cancerversary' approaches, she finds out that her breast cancer has returned. But this time it's spread throughout her body and she's given less than a year to live.

It's her husband Jack, a vet student, that she's most worried about. Daisy fears he won't be able to function on his own. He's busy with school, selfish and unable to do most things for himself. She toys around with the idea of finding him someone to love when she's gone. But, when reality hits and they start pushing each other away, it's too much for her to handle.

It was a struggle for me to get through this book. There were so many times I wanted to give up. And probably would have, had I not been given a copy in exchange for an honest review. I expected this to be a heartbreaking and emotional read, but honestly I was bored. I didn't connect with either of the characters or even feel the connection between them as a couple. It made it hard to get invested in the story and to care about what they were going through. This book just wasn't for me.

Before I go
Colleen Oakley
Simon and Schuster

“It’s back,” Daisy Richmond tells her husband Jack. And with those words, the young couple’s life takes another unexpected turn.

Three years ago Daisy battled cancer and, so far, seemed to have won. She and Jack picked up life where they left off—Daisy doing graduate work in counseling, and Jack finishing his veterinary internship. They even bought a house—a fixer upper Spanish-style bungalow from the twenties, all stucco and wrought-iron curlicues and red-tile roof. Daisy has done everything she can think of to keep the cancer away: yoga, green smoothies, meditation. Despite the shadow that hangs over them, life is good and they even start to think about having children.

Every year Daisy and husband Jack celebrate her “Cancerversary” with a weekend away. This year is no different. Except that only days before the trip Daisy discovers her cancer has returned. In a whirlwind of appointments with specialists learns she has four to six months to live.

She cries. Gets an incredible case of the f-its and fills her cupboards with processed junk food. But Daisy rights her ship fairly quickly—at least in a state-of-denial kind of way. The to-do lists starts again: buy caulk, fix warped floor, call the plumber, find Jack a wife. Yep, Daisy is on a mission to a woman to replace her. Someone to pick up Jack’s socks, stock the frig with kale, have those babies. “I’mtyringtofindJackawife” she confesses to best friend Kayleigh. And so together they scope out prospects for Jack at work, in the bookstore, online dating sites. Daisy buys Jack Preparing for the Death of a Love One and leaves it on his bedside table. She’s got this.

Except she doesn’t. Because since she’s planning for Jack’s Life After Daisy, she retreats from Jack’s Life With Daisy. She withdraws. He worries. Life is pretty bleak. Until, as the publisher’s blurb says, “Daisy is forced to decide what’s more important in the short amount of time she has left: her husband’s happiness—or her own?”

I really, really wanted to love Before I Go. I mean, morbid though it may be, what wife hasn’t thought about this scenario, even briefly? I know I have. Would hubby ever eat a salad again? Would he scrub the tub each week? Would he remember to buy the candles I love … and actually burn them? Who (surely, not would) he remarry? And on and on. But the novel never really came together for me until the end and the epilogue where the writing became more honest and less “chick-lit-y”. But those last chapters just might make Before I Go worth reading.

[more at thisismysymphony.net]

Although the premise of the story seemed a little far fetched, I thought I'd try it. The first half of the book was difficult to get through--Daisy points out, ad nauseam, how incapable Jack is of taking care of himself. He can't put his socks away, he can't remember to pack his contact solution, he can't remember where he put his keys...all trying to get the reader to believe that when Daisy dies poor Jack is not going to be able to survive. I found it rather condescending, which made it difficult to believe that Daisy had a deep love for Jack. For some reason I decided to plod through and see if the story improved. Eh. The second half of the book was better, but mostly because Daisy stopped pointing out how pathetic Jack was. Overall I would not recommend the book and I am sorry I wasted my time reading it.

Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.
--Isaac Asimov

Daisy Richards has beat cancer in the past. However, after a few years, the news from Doctor Sanderson is far more difficult for her and Jack to handle. This time the cancer has spread throughout Daisy's body. She has only four to six months to live. The novel before i go by Colleen Oakley is about how Daisy, Jack, her mother and her friends react to this news. It's also about what will Daisy choose to do with the remainder of her life?

This novel will break your heart and mend it again. Daisy seems like a real person. Many times I thought, "Well, I would react the same way as Daisy in this situation." I thought this way when she bought bunches and bunches of groceries she didn't need. I could also understand when she became so terribly angry with Kayleigh, her friend. Horrible feelings about Kayleigh flew out of her mouth like birds taking flight.

Daisy also decides to help Jack find a new wife. So, she begins looking on the internet and she goes to the dog park and other places to find the perfect woman for her Jack. At first, I didn't like this part of the novel. It seemed silly. What woman in her right mind looks for a wife for her husband before she dies? Not me, I'm too jealous to do such a good deed for my husband. But the author, Colleen Oakley, pulls the matchmaking game off well. Daisy wavers in her decision. She becomes extremely jealous, her imagination grows wider and wider. She misjudges Jack's feelings and where he is sleeping and with whom before she goes under the surgeon's knife.

This part of the novel became fun. It twisted my emotions all sorts of ways. I found myself angry with Jack and didn't know why. I hated the woman named Pamela for no good reason. I mumbled about Copper, Pamela's horse.

Taking a deep breath and calming down again, I suppose before I go is all about life. Its never totally dark and never is it totally light. I suppose our lives are like the weather, a little bit of sun here, overcast here and rainy here. In the end, there is always a rainbow in the sky. In the novel, Daisy learned the best way to handle it was just "to let go." I know one thing my eyes are still wet from crying about what happened in the month of May. Is it really all about Jack, or is it still very much about Daisy-Bear? Gallery Books, colleenoakley.com/book/

It must take a lot of courage (or moxie) to chose the subject of death for a first novel. There's just such a range of emotion to cover, and it will be different for each character's age.

Colleen Oakley has done a magnificent job of taking us into the heart and mind of 27 year old Daisy, a psychology grad student whose cancer recurs after three years, with a chilling terminal diagnosis. Her precious husband Jack, a student in veterinary medicine, is depicted as very intelligent but perhaps a little lacking in the commonsense area.

She is mired in inertia for a while: in disbelief, despair, grief - then as though she can no longer contemplate her own death, her thoughts turn to Jack's survival and she determines she must find him a wife. Not an uncommon theme, having been done in movies and books before. To avoid spoilers, I'll stop the plot description here.

While I am considerably older than Daisy, the specter of imminent death (if one is honest) is terrifying and knows no age limits. Being empathic to a fault, it was easy to lose myself in Daisy's story.

A great story, really good writing. Just be prepared to have your heart strings tugged repeatedly.

This was a highly emotional read for me. 27 yr. old Daisy is in her second dance with "lots of cancer" and things aren't looking good for a successful outcome. This story hit close to home for me and the author does a great job of putting the reader inside Daisy's anguished life.

Can you imagine knowing you're dying at age 27? Knowing you'll never be able to have the children you dreamed of with the husband (Jack) you love...a husband you hate to leave alone? So what does Daisy decide to do? Find someone who can fill her shoes and be a companion for Jack.

Only it's not as easy as it seems. The struggles Daisy deals with (everything from her failing memory to the waiting game of her trial drugs) end up being little compared to what Jack is privately dealing with - a great flip-side to this story. Getting a glimpse inside what this poor man is going through is as heart-breaking as what Daisy is facing.

This is a great, emotional, heart-felt story!

A special thank you to Gallery, Threshold, Pocket Books and NetGalley for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Delighted to discover this new Atlanta southern author, Colleen Oakley! If this is a debut, can't wait to see what is next. BEFORE I GO is a poignant, novel of love and loss, mixed with humor and emotion, keeping you glued to the pages-to learn the fate of lovable Daisy.

Daisy Richmond is still in her twenties, and has had cancer before; she and her much loved husband, Jack have gotten past the fear and each year they celebrate another year of cancer-free remission.

Jack is a veterinary student and will be graduating soon. The couple have big plans to create a family with dreams for the future, as most young married couples.

When Daisy receives the devastating news her cancer has returned, they will not be celebrating. She begins worrying how Jack will survive without her in his life, for the future. She is very organized and runs a tight household, and has always been there for Jack in every way.

She becomes obsessed with finding Jack his next wife. While she is going through her fears, and concerns, trying all sorts of trial drugs and therapy to extend her life; instead of enjoying her precious time with her husband, she is moody and withdrawn, while addicted to finding the perfect replacement wife. When things start looking like her plan is working, she gets afraid, jealous and possessive.

Colleen delivers a beautiful and emotional novel, with nice character development, characters you care about, and enough suspense to keep readers guessing what is up, with Jack. She creates the right amount of humor mixed with the tragedy and illness, told with compassion. I enjoyed the sassy and honest relationship with her best friend, Kayleigh-a nice touch; and a likable and supportive husband.

While personally understanding the emotions surrounding cancer, as my mom has been battling for a year with ups and down with chemo, treatment, side effects, complications, and not always receiving the hopeful and positive news from ongoing scans and tests. A thought-provoking takeaway for readers, to treasure time with loved ones, while we can.

A riveting and compelling debut, fans of The Replacement Wife, by Eileen Goudge, as well as authors, Jojo Moyes, Kaira Rouda, Jane Green, Elizabeth Hein, Emily Giffin, Jennifer Weiner, and Liane Moriarty will enjoy Oakley's unique style, with insights into today’s contemporary women, marriage, and relationships. Highly recommend, and look forward to reading more!

This is a really well written book. Daisy's cancer has come back and has been told she might live 6 months. Just in time to see her husband Jack graduate from veterinarian school. Daisy is a list maker and one of those items is to find Jack a new wife so he won't be left alone.

This book hit a little close to home for me. I'm an 8 year breast cancer survivor. I was lucky that the cancer had clear margins and didn't go to my lymph nodes so there is a 99% chance it won't come back. Daisy's first cancer went to her lymph nodes so she had a good chance of it coming back. Daisy is a confident person who just wants to make sure everything is in order once she is gone especially making sure her husband is okay and taken care of. She thinks he needs someone to take care of him. I think this is a distraction for her from the cancer and dying and gives her something to do even though deep down it isn't what she wants to happen.

I really liked Daisy and Jack and her friend Kayleigh. I thought they had a great relationship and it was sad to see her trying to ruin what they had for the last few months she was alive. I wanted to reach in and shake Daisy. Remind her that what she has with Jack is something special and that she needs to spend what time she had left with Jack as much as possible.

Even if you haven't had cancer like me, this is well worth the read. It is so beautifully written and will pull the reader right into the lives of the characters. The reader will care a lot for Daisy and it's so sad to know that she won't live for very long. She is a great character. At the end you wish that Daisy and Jack can live a long and healthy life together.

I dived into the pages of this book with so much excitement and glee, I had been wanting to read it for a while after snagging it from NetGalley and was gearing myself up for heart lurching moments, tears even and a few sniffles.

Sometimes what you expect to get is nowhere near it and you feel a bit ripped off and want your money back.

Daisy and Jack are a young couple, happily married for years and then Daisy developed breast cancer and BEAT that darn cancer until it was all gone. It made them closer, it gave them strength to know they can beat anything in the future.

Life goes on in a very normal sort of way, until one day Daisy hears the worst news she could ever imagine and the world jut stops for a moment.

Daisy has stage IV breast cancer back as well as other tumours including a large one on the base of her skull. The outlook is not good, she is pretty much, going to die. Treatment will only prolong her life somewhat.

Here is where the book started to confuse me. Quite suddenly Jack is pulling away from Daisy, as in almost NO comfort at all to her, working late, avoiding connections, I was so angry at him as a character, I felt he was weak, selfish and pathetic.

Yes, I get he was feeling the grief too, but you MAN UP for your woman when she only has months to live, you don't start ignoring her in her own home.

Daisy, being so nice and all, decides it's her mission to find a new wife to replace her once she has gone for Jack, so goes on a bit of a wife-hunt. The book got very unbelievable at this point and I felt the seriousness of the subject was being squashed. There is a twist here and there around this part of the book which I thought was quite good but in real life I am not sure how realistic it would be.

It didn't mix for me those parts of the book. She ignores her hubby forgetting who she is and is bored pottering around the house and having naps. I wanted to have sympathy for her for the cancer path is horrid and awful, I have seen it many times, but some of her choices and actions (that were written for her to act out) were just very silly and not of importance.

It's an easy read but I felt it did not flow and was a touch bored in places. Both main characters annoyed me and I think SO much more could have been done to make the story of this book just amazing. The ending for me just fell flat, not an ounce of emotion stirred in me. That was disappointing.

Not an awful book but certainly has room for improvement but if you like a chick-lit style book with a serious edge, you might enjoy this one. It was an okay book that was read quickly but will be forgotten just as fast.

Not just cancer... "Lots of Cancer" is the diagnosis that twenty-seven years old Daisy Richmond just got on the eve of her third anniversary of being cancer free~~her "Cancerversary". Three years ago Daisy won the battle against breast cancer. Now happily married to her absent-minded and adorable husband, Jack, she's facing a far worse prognosis. Daisy can't beat the cancer this time but what she can do is make sure that her husband is going to be well taken care of once she breathes her very last.

To do that, Daisy is going to find Jack his next wife.

It's hard for me to believe that this is Colleen Oakley's debut novel. This book is rich with emotion. The author has us get deep inside the heart and mind of this woman who wants nothing more than to see to it that her husband is going to be taken care of after she's gone; but, then she is still a woman and a wife and to imagine your husband gravitating toward someone else~~heart wrenching.

This story is told from Daisy's POV. She's a complicated character and her layers are peeled away rhythmically by Ms. Oakley. This~~the way that Daisy is portrayed as not perfect; she's flawed like the rest of us~~is brilliant writing. Also brilliant is the very last chapter. It quite literally, took my breath away.

4.5 ✰'s

An e-Copy of this book was granted to me from the publisher via NetGalley. The opinions above are expressly my own.

Oh my gosh, I know I shouldn't have read this book (I knew it would be an emotional read) and I devoured it within two days. First I kept thinking that I probably am secretly dying and this is a prelude as to what would happen to me physically and mentally. Now that I have settled down a bit and am rationally thinking that I probably don't currently have cancer and I probably really am a healthy person it really helps you put your life in perspective. Was that silly fight with your husband THAT big of a deal? Is your job THAT horrible? I am thankful for this read because while it was entertaining it really is a helpful reminder that life is too short and you just never know... when you will be hit by a bus. Well done Colleen Oakley!

"Before I Go" is a lovely and sad but ultimately uplifting love story. Daisy is given the bad news at age 27 that the cancer she beat into remission nearly 4 years ago is back. This time it's far advanced Stage IV and has metastasized to multiple other organs, and treatment seems futile. She has "Lots of Cancer" and may have only a few months to live. After living in a paralysis of grief and indecision for a week or so, she and her husband Sam decide that they should just carry on with their normal lives. He goes back to school and work since he is only a few months away from completing his 2 doctorate degrees, and she returns, half-heartedly to her studies as well. Daisy is the organizer and doer in their household. Sam can't cook, leaves dirty socks on the floor, loses his keys and phone and wallet regularly, and Daisy can't imagine how he will function without her in his life. She vows that her primary mission should be to find him a replacement wife. While this sounds like a set-up for a series of humorous comedy skits, it doesn't really work out that way. After identifying one potential candidate for Sam's next wife, Daisy is beset with insecurities and jealousy. She pushes away the people that are most important in her life, including her husband, best friend and her mother, insisting that she can handle things herself.

The author handles Daisy's anxiety and terror and confusion and despair without resorting to maudlin cliché, making her ultimately a believable character. The topic certainly inspires each of us to think "what would I do if I were given only months to live?" and indeed none of us can know that until we are faced with the news ourselves.

The novel is thought provoking and entertaining with a satisfying ending.

Before I Go by Colleen Oakley is a bittersweet, emotional and surprisingly humorous novel. It is a thought-provoking and riveting story about a twenty-seven year old cancer survivor who is stunned by the news her cancer has returned and she only has months to live.

Just as Daisy Richmond and her husband Jack are about to celebrate another Cancerversary, their world is turned completely upside down by her shocking diagnosis. The couple try to keep their lives as normal as possible but Daisy soon finds herself consumed with worries about how Jack will go on without her. She devises a plan to find him a replacement wife, but Daisy is surprised by her reaction when it looks like she might have succeeded in finding him the perfect woman.

Daisy is an über organized, strong and capable woman and she does not let her diagnosis defeat her. Her reaction to the news is believable and she definitely goes through all the stages of grief (albeit at an accelerated rate). She tries to maintain her regular routine, but her worry about how Jack will go on without her is soon uppermost in her mind. Daisy turns to her best friend Kayleigh for dating advice, and they concoct a somewhat harebrained but well-intentioned scheme to find Jack a new wife. In the process, Daisy pushes Jack away and in his helpless, absentminded way, he lets her. Daisy eventually figures out the reasons behind her actions, but is it too late for her to repair the damage to their relationship?

Before I Go is an incredibly heartwarming and realistic novel that is a perfect blend of heartache and humor. The cast of characters is appealing and beautifully developed with relatable flaws and imperfections. Colleen Oakley has an engaging writing style but it is the unique storyline that makes the story so captivating. Despite its serious subject matter, it is an overall light read that I absolutely loved and highly recommend.

I received a complimentary copy for review.

What an extraordinary novel this is.

It is as if the author, Colleen Oakley, has been there...close to death, young, wed...'lots of cancer'. Her depiction of twenty seven year old Daisy is insightful and real. The reactions of her husband, Jack, veterinarian in training, are on target.

Not that this would be the story of every couple, but it is so embraceable.

Daisy, has beaten breast cancer, and then a few years later...the cancer reappears, stage IV, spread over her young body. A body with so much ahead that could have been...with Jack.

How Daisy copes is a decision to find Jack another wife to take care of him when she is gone. Sounds like a sitcom and unreal, but if you read the book, you will go with it.

Her treatments, their emotions, their marriage, the head games, the physical manifestations make you love Daisy with all your heart.

You will also love Jack and Kayleigh too, her best friend.

You will discover that this a novel with so much going for it...you will laugh and you will cry again and again.

Having been with women and honored to be part of their lives as they have faced Cancer served to touch me deep within my heart and soul.

Congratulations Colleen for an extraordinary work! It was a challenge for me to do justice to reviewing Daisy's story.

I read a short summary of “Before I Go” in a magazine, I believe, and I was intrigued by the story line and decided to purchase the audiobook. I began listening in May 2015, a bit at a time, and was struck by the familiarity of Daisy’s story. My personality is similar to Daisy’s: very healthy, organized, independent, a bit of a control freak, a planner and incessant list-maker. My husband has a personality similar to Jack’s and I smiled knowingly at the personality differences – the way he would leave his socks on the floor or “pretend” to forget to make a reservation. I would nod and laugh when I heard her reactions and responses to these qualities, as I have felt exactly that way at times. Imagine my surprise when during the time I was listening I was called by my doctor who told me my mammogram had showed a cluster of cells that wasn’t there before. I went to have them biopsied, and as it turns out, I had breast cancer. I was shocked, bewildered and afraid, and being able to listen to Daisy go through the same roller coaster of emotions was something I have never experienced before. I found myself laughing out loud and nodding at the honesty of her thoughts and emotions, and crying with her, for her, for me, for every woman that has to take the journey no one ever wants to take. I decided not to tell anyone I was listening to the book (even my husband, with whom I always discuss the books I am reading at length – it probably gets on his nerves) because I thought they might try to talk me out of finishing it. I am sure such advice would be well-intentioned, but I needed to hear how Daisy’s story ended. I know it’s a fictional story, but I want you to know that it helped me to face my fears and deal honestly with my emotions. It helped me to see that I don’t need to control what I was never meant to control. My prognosis is good, from what I understand, but one day I may be in the position she found herself in. I hope and pray that I will be able to enjoy each day as it comes and not worry about what tomorrow may or may not bring, or what will happen to my family when I am gone. I am so grateful for this book. It was a comfort to me during a difficult time. I was able to talk to the author and found out that she had interviewed a woman who was dying of breast cancer. The interview made a huge impact on her and was the impetus for the book. It enabled Ms. Oakley to speak about the emotions of dealing with cancer with authenticity. I was very impressed with this book and with Ms. Oakley's writing. I look forward to her next book!

At the age of 24, Daisy received a big shock when she was diagnosed with breast cancer. Now, three years later and after having beaten the illness, she and her husband Jack are about to celebrate her three year 'Cancerversary'. Yet, it's on that day that the doctor tells her the cancer is back and already at stage 4, which means she most likely only has a few months left to live. Instead of making a wishlist of things to do before time's up, Daisy is mainly worried about Jack and how he's going to cope without having her around, without someone to take care of him. Daisy decides there's no other option but to help Jack, so she goes on a search to find him a new wife. However, Daisy's quest is not an easy one and while time's ticking away, Daisy is forced to not only think of Jack's happiness, but also her own.

If you're looking for a heart-breaking story that will almost certainly have you reaching for a box of tissues, Colleen Oakley's 'Before I Go' will definitely do the trick. This is an incredibly authentic and gripping story that reminded me a bit of Cecelia Ahern's beautiful novel 'P.S. I Love You.' Protagonist Daisy is a strong and independent young woman who finds herself battling cancer for the second time, and this time around she is set to lose. Throughout the novel, we follow Daisy on her journey, with a focus on just a few other well-developed and interesting characters such as Daisy's husband Jack and best friend Kayleigh.

The book deals with a topic that can be difficult to read or talk about to some people, namely the passing away of a loved one. Colleen Oakley has managed to approach this topic with a ton of emotion and authenticity, and it really made me think twice about life and how we never really know what could happen to suddenly change everything. The book is quite an emotional rollercoaster, from laughter to anger to tears (especially the last couple of chapters really made me reach for the tissues). Overall, 'Before I Go' is a strikingly thoughtful, melancholic and touching read, and without a doubt a stunning debut by author Colleen Oakley.

Daisy has been cancer free for almost three years and is wondering if her husband, Jack will remember to book somewhere nice for her ‘Cancerversary’? He’s not great with the everyday chores and she finds herself almost ‘mothering’ him on a daily basis. She doesn’t like picking up his socks, sorting out his drawers or reminding him to eat. But she loves him to bits. Complete opposites, they nevertheless work well together. He’s the scatty scientist type, while she leans towards OCD with her need to organise everything and make never-ending lists of things to be done.
When the cancer returns, the couple struggle to cope with the diagnosis and can’t seem to find a mutual way to enjoy the time they have left together. Jack is heartbroken but he doesn’t know how to verbalise it. Daisy is in quasi-denial and refuses to let herself relax on old habits. She worries that Jack will not cope when she dies and she hatches a plan to find him a new wife. What starts off as a plan for her husband’s future, turns into a gut wrenching experience for Daisy. How can you find your own replacement when you don’t want to leave? All the while, the tensions are building at home as the couple tiptoe around the cancer-in-the-room. Daisy even agrees to letting her mother, a highly emotional, bird-watching, lonely woman, help her out. Luckily she has her feisty and flirty best friend, Kayleigh, to call on for some light relief.

This debut is sure to be popular. The publishers have placed a sticker on the cover offering a refund if the reader doesn’t think it’s ‘as good as JoJo Moyes’. This seems a brave, if risky, move as Moyes has sold millions of books and has a huge fan base. Her novel Me Before You has a similar theme to this story (dying character, lots of emotion) and the covers are remarkably similar (UK edition). Hopefully this won’t backfire on Colleen Oakley as her writing is good. Damn good. The only small issue I had with it (and it may not even have been obvious to the author or editor at the time) was that the couple of black characters that were included were described as black straight away. This led to an uncomfortable feeling as the colour of their skin was completely irrelevant to the story. Both were staff in medical centres and neither were mentioned again. No white characters got the same treatment and it just jarred a bit. That said, the medical research was well used, the mood was light enough to carry each chapter through without becoming maudlin and Kayleigh and Daisy’s Mother were wonderful additions. Jack was more in the background and I couldn’t just grasp him. Daisy was an odd one too. Straight laced, but innocent with it. Distant and rude at times (not overly keen of her attitude to her friendly neighbour, or her treatment of her therapist) but if I knew I was dying, I’m sure I would have moments of being an absolute bitch! She balances these epsiodes with deep profound thoughts, but never voices them aloud. "... how [personal] memories act like kersosene on the fire of my love for him. They engulf me. Scorch the innards of my being."

This may make it seem that I didn’t enjoy Before I Go. This is not the case. I really enjoyed it. It is an ideal read for someone who loves to escape for a while. Sometimes we need to have a good, inexplicable cry. Let off some steam, switch off from dreary chores or crappy TV. You could do a lot worse than this book. It is a poignant story of hope, fear and love. Three interchangeable emotions that can divert direction at any time. An emotional read with slivers of humour, ideal for fans of comfy slippers, long chats with your BFF and weepy movies. I’m just not sure I would compare it to JoJo Moyes, that might be a bit overly optimistic. This is still one I would recommend and it is well worth the price of a paperback for the escapism and emotional rollercoaster.

Colleen Oakley’s “Before I Go” captured my immediate interest and it never flagged as I rapidly read the pages to discover how Daisy’s deals with her impending death and her desire to protect her husband in the present and future. Her reactions and plans are fraught with unexpected difficulties resulting in multiple miscommunications and misunderstandings. The plot is well structured and delivers increasing anticipation for the reader.

I liked the main characters, Daisy has nearly her completed her Masters in Psychology, who has “Lots of Cancer” and is always 5 steps ahead in her perception of everyone’s emotional state. Quite simply she has control issues from which she is totally blind. Jack is Daisy’s absent-minded husband, who adores her far beyond than anyone realizes. Kayleigh (who is also 27, like Daisy) is her best friend since Elementary school, her life is directionless and her main entertainment is having flings with younger men, some who are recent high school graduates. Her strengths are her loyalty, honesty and directness. Although her role is small, it is important. Each character is someone that is relatable; a person, you would want in your circle. For some reason, I thought of Debra Winger's character in "Terms of Endearment" when reading certain passages.

Though the topic is sad and the reader follows Daisy goes through the various stages of grieving; there is a sprinkling of humor at just the right times throughout the story to lower the tension and makes the reader connect to her even more. One example is that she deals with her distress medical encounter by stating ‘If there was a Zagat’s guide for doctors, he would have no stars’. Oakley’s has a gift in using humor to convey a perception of reality.

My one issue is that there were frequent mentions of the sexual act (between Daisy and Jack, though they were not particularly graphic) which made this story more believable because our health does impact all facets of life. However, I do object to Kayleigh’s behaviors because they are more descriptive and detailed which are borderline pornographic, though I suspect it won’t offend most people (most television is much more flagrant).

I would recommend this story to anyone who likes realistic fiction. My former Pastor’s wife set him up with his second wife, when she was dying. Additionally, I lost three young friends (30 -52) in the mid 2000’s to cancer and I knew that each one was very concerned about how her husband would cope in the future without her. This is a quick read that will be remembered long after you finish.

A heart-wrenching debut novel in the bestselling tradition of P.S. I Love You about a young woman with breast cancer who undertakes a mission to find a new wife for her husband before she passes away.

Twenty-seven-year-old Daisy already beat breast cancer three years ago. How can this be happening to her again?

On the eve of what was supposed to be a triumphant “Cancerversary” with her husband Jack to celebrate three years of being cancer-free, Daisy suffers a devastating blow: her doctor tells her that the cancer is back, but this time it’s an aggressive stage four diagnosis. She may have as few as four months left to live. Death is a frightening prospect—but not because she’s afraid for herself. She’s terrified of what will happen to her brilliant but otherwise charmingly helpless husband when she’s no longer there to take care of him. It’s this fear that keeps her up at night, until she stumbles on the solution: she has to find him another wife.

With a singular determination, Daisy scouts local parks and coffee shops and online dating sites looking for Jack’s perfect match. But the further she gets on her quest, the more she questions the sanity of her plan. As the thought of her husband with another woman becomes all too real, Daisy’s forced to decide what’s more important in the short amount of time she has left: her husband’s happiness—or her own?

--My thoughts. Okay, I have read a lot of good books so far this year. This is another one I highly recommend. Seriously. What would you do? I don't know if I would have the guts to do that? I mean, finding my mate a mate? I would so chicken out! The first three characteristics cracked me up. Daisy is trying to line everything up, but can we really every line everything up and be practical?

I agree it isn't fair, how come all the sudden he is romantic! Some other woman might get that. Grab some Kleenex, seriously!! This book will be one that will be talked about for years, in book clubs and all over. I wouldn't be surprised if there are movie talkings going on -- just wow.

In the moments after you’ve located your spouse’s misplaced keys, organized the bills, picked up the (forgotten) dry cleaning or prescriptions – the question – “How would they live without me” undoubtedly pops in your head. Sadly, for our heroine, Daisy Richmond she has to ask that very question about her dear, husband Jack and the answer has her looking for someone to be there when she can no longer.

I loved how Colleen Oakley framed the story of Before I Go, because in the process of getting to know Daisy, we not only fully understand and appreciate her motivation but we walk those miles in her shoes. Dear God that is not a walk anyone should have to take.

Being in Daisy’s head and trying to sort through her every thought might be exhausting, but she truly has a thousand things going through her mind that she needs to solve for. For her, the devil is in the details and making sure that Jack eats or his socks get picked up are the things she needs to grab on to as she navigates her remaining time. Daisy doesn’t let many people in, but those that are in her life are hers to love and cherish. She worries for them and wants to make sure that what they have is not lost when she is gone.

I liked Daisy a lot, but didn’t love her – I realize now why that is. Cancer is a cruel and insidious disease. Not only does it ravage the body, it wreaks havoc on your mind and changes one’s personality – we weren’t getting the real Daisy. The Daisy we meet is trying very hard to be her strong self but is only isolating herself from her people – the very people who love her unconditionally. It’s what comes out of that, which I think was the lesson of Before I Go for me – the people that love you, will love you no matter what and you can’t spare them the pain.

Not going to lie, Before I Go was a hard read for me – I always love an HEA and knowing that Daisy won’t necessarily get her own hurt my heart. But that’s the beauty of Colleen Oakley’s storytelling – We get to see something more from Daisy – strength of will and love that transcends her life on earth. Such an amazing story and I am so glad that I was able to read it.

Before I Go is a standalone, women's fiction novel written by author Colleen Oakley. The book synopsis is surprisingly thorough and that surprised me. I mean, why include so many spoilers for readers? Well, after finishing the book, I figure it's because Before I Go is more about the emotions than it is the story. The reader follows the main character on a heartbreaking emotional journey that feels all too real. I cried, I worried and grieved, and then I cried again. It was a lot. But the moral of this story is an important one. Spend quality time with those you care about. Communicate what's important to you. Let go of the stress and busyness of life and enjoy what you have while you have it because no one is guaranteed tomorrow. Before I Go was effective in reminding me of this fact, and I would recommend this book (and a large box of Kleenex) for this reason.

My favorite quote:
"'A cancer diagnosis can be particularly stressful, but I find it's all about perspective. I mean, we're all dying aren't we? I could walk out of here and get hit by a bus this evening. Really, none of us have any control over when we die, and that's the frightening part. The loss of control.' He smiles, obviously proud that he brought his lecture full circle while I grind my bones further into the seat to keep from screaming. If I've learned anything from Patrick so far, it's that there's nothing more patronizing than someone who is not dying telling someone who is how to feel about it. And why do people always say they could get hit by a bus? Like life is just one big game of Frogger, and people are getting struck left and right by dangerous city transport."

Before I Go is a heartbreaking and honest portrayal of a woman's emotional journey through terminal cancer and the painful thoughts of leaving her husband behind without her. I felt so much while reading this book for all the characters. Thought-provoking, introspective and heartbreaking, Before I Go was a beautiful debut. I can't wait to see what Colleen Oakley writes next.

Daisy is a doer and list-maker. She thrives on control and order. Her husband, Jack, is her complete opposite in that regard. He leaves his socks beside the bed every night, spills Fruit Loops on the kitchen floor and doesn't pick them up. Messes don't really bother Jack. But Daisy and Jack complement each other. They work. Until Daisy's cancer comes back.
I want fifty years, and all I get is a few extra months? It's like asking your boss for a five-thousand-dollar raise and he nods and says, "I can give you ten cents."

After years of being cancer-free, twenty-seven year old Daisy receives some terrible news that her cancer is back and this time it's bad. It's all over her body and there really is nothing doctors can do to make it go away. All of the treatments offered will merely prolong her life. To cope Daisy throws herself into things that make her comfortable — things she can control. Her main focus becomes fixing up her house that she and Jack moved in knowing it was a fixer upper and making sure her husband doesn't live the rest of his life alone.
I cannot die.
I will not die.
Then I look over at Jack in the darkness. The comforter rises and falls in time with his slow breathing. And as much as I try to keep the thought at bay, push it out of my head as I stare at my sleeping husband, like a seasoned thief, it sneaks in anyway.
But what if I do?

The author takes you into their daily life with Daisy's kale smoothies and Jack's Fruit Loops and kisses on the cheek. The loving happy home that we see in the beginning of the novel, slowing begins to morph and change in the smallest imperceptible increments as Daisy begins to deal with mortality and her limited time on earth. Jack's nights at the veterinary school get longer. The two of them begin to drift apart.

So much through the book, I wanted to take Daisy aside and help her refocus her energy on things that would be more useful. But that's often a reflection of all of us. In life, we spend too much time worry and stressing about this and that instead of taking a step back and look at what we're neglecting. In Daisy's case it was her marriage. She was so focused on her end goal that she was blind to Jack's needs.

Daisy was a hard character for me to like, but I think that was the point. Her flaws, fierce independence, and determination propelled her to do a lot of things that I wouldn't do. I have to admit that I was annoyed with her character throughout the novel. I felt like her abrasive personality was almost too much, I wanted some fragility mixed in, but that came later. She constantly pushed Jack away, as she struggled with the inevitable period that the universe was placing on her time on earth. Her unending list of todos that would never get accomplished and the future of those she would leave behind weighed on her. Having witnessed her mother's long battle with depression after her father's death, she knew firsthand the effects of having someone you loved so deeply be ripped from you. She didn't want that for Jack, so she trudged forward trying to find someone for him.

Honestly, I'm torn with how I feel about this book. On one hand, I loved the progression of Daisy's character. I loved the emotions I felt in the latter half of the novel — extreme frustration, anger, sadness, happiness, relief. At times, I felt like I was having a panic attack right along with Daisy. I was so drawn into the story and her emotions. On the other hand, it took awhile for the story to gain momentum and to keep me completely engaged. But once I was hooked, I was in it all the way.

3.5 - 4 stars

* I received a copy from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.

On the cusp of Daisy’s four year anniversary of being cancer-free, she gets the dreaded call from her doctor. Her cancer is back! But this time it not only invades her breast, but has also travel to other parts of her body. Including an orange size tumor that has taken up residence on the back of her brain. If this news isn’t enough to cause a huge blow, her doctor proceeds to inform her that she has approximately four to six months to live.

But Daisy doesn’t have time to die. She has too much to do. Including caulk the windows, fix the door that sticks, a laundry list of other household chores … not to mention, her husband Jack needs her. Who will pick up his dirty socks off the floor or scratch his back? Who will pack his lunches and make sure that he doesn’t eat cereal for every meal? And, that’s when it hits her. Daisy will find Jack a replacement wife.

And so her search begins. She searches coffee shops, dog parks and even places an ad (pretending to be Jack) at an online dating site. She is going to make sure that, before she goes, Jack is sufficiently taken care of. What she didn’t expect was the guilt and jealousy that would come along with it. Could she really handle seeing Jack with another woman? But can she go in peace knowing that he doesn’t have anyone to care for him?

We all have an expiration date. But if you knew that you only had a limited time to live, how would you spend your remaining days? Would you think of others like Daisy did? Or would you live out your last days checking things off your bucket list?

Saying that I loved this story doesn’t even begin to touch on how I truly feel about this book. The way the author brings the characters to life with each word that she writes is amazing. There are many books that I’ve read and enjoyed, but it takes a special story and writing style to get the effect that this book had on me. And the way that she takes such a serious topic and perfectly incorporates humor is sheer brilliance. If you’re looking for a book that will make you laugh one minute, cry another, but leave you appreciating life a little more than you did before you started the book, then you must read this book!

There is a line in the Bruce Springsteen song, “Human Touch,” that says, “Ain’t gonna find no miracles here.”

As I read this book, those words filtered through my mind every time I would hope that Daisy would somehow, some way, survive her second round of cancer.

Daisy was twenty-three when she first had breast cancer; now four years later, she and husband Jack are ready to celebrate three years of no cancer, a “cancerversary,” they call it. The two are going to go on a rare getaway, something hard fought for them due to Jack’s pursuing a double doctorate degree and Daisy going after her Masters.

Just days before they are scheduled to go, Daisy feels a lump and goes to see her doctor, dreading the words, “The cancer is back.” But it’s worse than that. Her doctor informs her that she has “lots of cancer.” It’s everywhere, and now the question isn’t so much “if” but “when.”

Daisy is determined to ease Jack’s transition from husband to widower, and she decides that the best thing to do for him is to line him up a new wife. A brilliant man, Jack is many wonderful things, but self-sufficient he is not. This is a man who doesn’t know he has to add water to a can of chicken noodle soup. Yes, Daisy needs something to focus on other than her dire prognosis, but she also truly believes that she’s helping her husband by finding him a new mate.

A couple of years ago, I read Eileen Goudge’s The Replacement Wife, which uses the same premise: wife with terminal cancer tries to find husband a new spouse. Whereas the two writers take their stories in very different directions, both address what happens when a wife commits to securing a ‘replacement’ for herself.

Daisy is young. She’s only twenty-seven, and she’s spent her life with Jack largely postponing things she wants to do. They don’t travel, they don’t have children – they keep saying that they will do these things after Jack graduates with his Ph.D and M.D. in veterinary medicine. Now Daisy must face the reality that there is no “later;” there is only “now.” All of those “later” experiences will be had by someone else.

And the thought terrifies her.

Helped by her best friend Kayleigh, Daisy try to find the perfect woman for Jack. At the same time, she knowingly pushes away her husband. She even says at one point that by putting distance between them, she’s helping him prepare for her death. She leaves him books about how to cope with a dying spouse, and the few conversations they have are stilted. Daisy wants to debate whether or not to get cremated, and Jack wants to just forget for a little bit.

There are times you will be furious with Daisy. She makes some decisions that frustrated me to no end, yet I can’t say I necessarily blamed her. She believed she was doing the right thing. She did have regrets, she did see where she made mistakes, and this helped me care much more for her. Perhaps Colleen Oakley, in having Daisy do such dumb stuff, was doing for her readers what Daisy felt she was doing for Jack: Oakley alleviated the pain of Daisy’s diagnosis.

This is a story not just about marriage, but about friendship and family. Daisy reflects on her childhood with a single mother, her father having died when Daisy was a toddler. Her mother wants to be a part of Daisy’s life and her sickness, about which Daisy finds herself ambivalent. She puts Kayleigh’s life under the microscope and judges, sometimes severely. And she worries about her husband.

As Daisy remembers the little things – the times she rushed out of bed with Jack to make sure she wasn’t late for work, or his invitations to dinner that she turned down – she faces the regrets of all that she hasn’t done, all that she’s postponed till a tomorrow that isn’t going to come. It will make you think about your own “next times,” and perhaps you will, in a sense, carpe diem.

Yes, this is a heartbreakingly sad book. It’s also, though, uplifting. There is hope to be found here, even for Daisy. The sentiment that it’s never too late is not true, Colleen Oakley says. Don’t waste time. Don’t give up. And don’t assume a tomorrow that may never come.

Live for today. Live richly, live lovingly, and live fully.

Published on VoxLibris.net
@VoxLibris

Before I Go is more about the emotions than it is the story. I will tell you right now - if you are looking for "light and fluffy", this isn't the book for you. This is a well written book that had me flipping pages way past my bedtime!

The reader follows the main character, a 27-year old named Daisy, as she moves through her life. At the very young age of 24, Daisy has already survived breast cancer and on the "Cancerversary", she finds out she has a very aggressive cancer with only a few months to live. Instead of wallowing in her diagnosis, Daisy accepts it, and begins to worry about her husband, Jack and how he will be able to cope without her there to take care of his life. She worries about who is going to cook for Jack, who will clean up all the socks he discards by his side of the bed, and even more, who will give him children. It's impossible not to feel Daisy's pain, confusion and sadness as she thinks about what life will be like after she's gone.

Daisy decides to take on the task of finding Jack a wife before she leaves this earth, and that is how she begins to spend her time. While on one hand, I was curious to see how the events would progress in Daisy's search for a wife, I was also worried about reaching the end, knowing what that meant. She gets help from her best friend and together they check out dog parks, coffee bars, and dating sites. Daisy begins evaluating every woman she meets and pulling away from Jack in an attempt to help him start a new life without her.

When I had finished Daisy's story, I realized my eyes were full of tears and I had a lump in the back of my throat. I will not give away the ending except to say... YOU MUST READ IT!!! While the topic of this book is cancer, it is infused with humor and believeability.

ARC kindly provided by the publisher via Edelweiss in exchange for an honest review.

Before I Go was absolutely, heartbreakingly beautiful!

When Daisy's cancer aggressively reappears at the age of 27, leaving her with a fatal diagnosis, she's faced with the question of "what would you do if you knew you were going to die soon?" Much of what she does is the same stuff she's always been doing: grocery shopping, cleaning the house, and getting estimates for repairs that her house desperately needs. But, late one night, a thought begins to niggle at her about what her husband will do without her. Daisy was convinced that Jack wouldn't take care of himself properly after she died. Thus begins her mission to find him a wife.

While finding a wife for Jack is a thoughtful goal, it wasn't the best thought-out plan. Beyond not knowing what she would say to someone she deemed a potential mate, she didn't really consider how this plan would make her feel. It's one thing to know that you want your loved ones to move on and be happy after you're gone, but imagine having to know the details. Can you imagine how overwhelming it would be to know that not only are you dying, but there is a living, breathing, healthy woman just waiting in the wings to replace you and make the love of your life forget about you?

Without giving too much away, Daisy finds a woman that she feels meets a set of criteria that she concocted for Jack's future wife (although I must mention that Jack knows nothing about this). Upon learning that they already know each other and hearing about the time they're spending together (Jack is getting his DVM and is helping the woman with her sick horse), Daisy starts to realize that her plan to make sure Jack is happy after she dies (by finding him a wife) is making her unhappy.

This was the source of most of my tears. Before I Go is written from Daisy's perspective and, therefore, is completely one-sided. In the beginning, we, as readers, can't be sure exactly what is going on between Jack and the woman, but we're taken on the same rollercoaster as Daisy. Are Jack and the woman getting along well? Are they just friends? Are they more? Has she already replaced Daisy? Daisy wants what's best for Jack and thinks it's a good idea that he's getting to know the woman she's deemed good enough to be his future wife. At the same time, there's a slight jealously brewing that this woman is going to get the life that was unfairly taken away from Daisy.

I, as a reader, was so desperately upset that Jack and Daisy weren't going to be together forever. We were given glimpses of the beginnings of their relationship and I literally sighed at the sweetness of it. I'd honestly read a whole book about the early years of their relationship and how they first met (which there's a quote from that story I'd love to put up but am, unfortunately, not allowed to). Daisy's terminal diagnosis put her in a really bad state, mentally, and she began pushing Jack away. This was hard on me because I wanted her to realize that she only had a little time left with him and that her last days with Jack should be...with Jack.

I cried a lot. I cried for the strain Daisy's diagnosis put on their relationship. I cried for her family and friends that were trying to put on a brave face for Daisy, but we can't forget that they're losing someone they love. Her mother, who lost her husband when Daisy was three, is now about to lose her only daughter. Daisy's best friend Kayleigh, who reminds me so much of myself (she's funny and doesn't like a coworker just because she wears sweaters with animals on them non-ironically), is losing someone that's basically a sister to her. Jack, who'll never get to have kids with the woman he'd planned to spend the rest of his life with. I cried thinking "if it were me"...

Reading the first two thirds of Before I Go, I thought that this was a solid four-star read, but the emotions that this book evoked in the last third of the book where enough to push me to a five-star rating. The first third had me all over the place with my emotions (but I was able to keep my eyes dry) because I couldn't stop thinking how unfair it was. I adored the characters in this book and didn't think any of them deserved this. The second third had me firmly rooted to the ground. Daisy had a mission, which gave me something to distract myself from the sadness. The last third, I cried pretty much constantly. The writing was amazing and I found myself so immersed into the story that it was as if I was dying and I had to come to terms with the fact that my husband would need to be taken care of after I died; and with the fact that I hadn't even considered what this would do to my best friend or to my mother; and then I was faced with the challenge of letting go.

I can't stress how amazingly written this book is! I will warn, for those of you that need a lot of dialogue, there is a lot of introspection and reflecting on her life. Don't get me wrong, there is dialogue, but probably not as much as one is used to. Honestly, that would normally turn me off of a book, but I didn't mind it here.

I am definitely looking forward to more of Colleen Oakley's work!

Before I Go is the first novel by American author, Colleen Oakley. In February, almost three years after being declared cancer-free, twenty-seven year old Daisy Richmond discovers she has won the cancer lottery twice. And this second win is the big one: she will not survive. And once she accepts that fact, she suddenly begins to worry about Jack: how will her loving but disorganised husband cope without her there to manage his life, to scratch his back where he can’t reach, to cook him meals, bear his children and save him from suffocating in a sea of discarded socks?

As Daisy narrates current events, the reaction of family and close friends to this latest news, her own progress through the stages of grief, and her secret search for a wife for Jack, the reader is given glimpses of Daisy’s earlier life: her childhood with her widowed mother, meeting Jack, her first cancer diagnosis, her career. She actually finds the woman who ticks all the boxes for what she believes Jack needs, but when they meet, things don’t quite turn out how Daisy had anticipated. Is this a case of “be careful what you wish for….”?

Oakley touches on many topics related to cancer and death: stages of grief; the hopes raised by clinical trials; the change in priorities and perception with a terminal diagnosis; the attitude of some health professionals (“…there’s nothing more patronising than someone who is not dying telling someone who is how to feel about it.”); the labile emotions (“…for weeks now I’ve been a walking bingo cage, my emotions tumbling around on top of each other like balls of numbers and I never know which one is going to come out next.”); the gut-punch power of certain words (like “widower”).

Whether or not this is an authentic depiction of how a dying woman with a brain tumour would think and react can, of course, only be confirmed by someone in that situation, but this book will certainly elicit in the reader some consideration as well as laughter and a lump in the throat. There is plenty of humour in what could have been a sombre tale: Daisy’s inner monologue is sometimes serious, but often funny; her use of Capitals (“…now that I have Lots of Cancer…”), her vivid imagination, the banter with Jack and the honest brevity of her best friend Kayliegh, all create laugh-out-loud moments.

Oakley employs some lovely descriptive prose (“…the irreversible rush of emotions that overtakes everything when you first are falling in love. It’s like trying to stop a flood with a chain-link fence. Impossible.”) and while the characters are not all instantly appealing, and the end is predictable, the journey is enjoyable and worthwhile. Readers will look forward to more from Oakley.

My Thoughts:

Before I Go by Colleen Oakley was a heartbreaking read. My eyes are puffy, my nose is red, and I've gone through a ton of tissue. This story was very realistic and relatable. The story is told from Daisy's point of view, and as she describes her husband and their marriage, I could relate. She spoke of things that drove her crazy about her husband in a very candid and affectionate manner, as well as everything she loved about him. Daisy and Jack had a strong marriage based on love, affection, deep friendship, and understanding. She spoke of the present and reflected on their past.

Daisy has been Cancer free for four years, and every year she celebrates this miracle with her husband, Jack. Unfortunately, on her yearly routine check up, the doctor is concerned from her blood test results and orders a PET scan and MRI. When the test results come in, Daisy is told that the Cancer is all over her body, and she only has four to six months to live. As you can imagine, this devastating news turns Daisy and Jack's lives and marriage upside down. Daisy is worried about how Jack will survive when she dies, and decides to find him the perfect wife, so he won't be alone. However, things don't go as planned.

Before I Go, dealt with the various stages of grief. It was difficult watching Daisy push her husband away, but I understood her constant pain and turmoil. Jack was a wonderful and caring husband. My heart broke for him, as he continued to reach out to Daisy, until he finally shut down. I loved Daisy's best friend, Kayleigh. She was funny, loyal, caring, and always stood by Daisy's side.

I thought that the beginning of the story started out slow, and there was too much description dedicated to the mundane. However, once Daisy get's her diagnosis, the story flew by. Before I Go, tore my heart in shreds. You have to be in the mood to cry and get emotional before you read this story. It really had an impact on me, and the first thing I wanted to do when I finished this book was tell my husband how much I love him.

My Rating:

I give, Before I Go by Colleen Oakley 4 Heartbreaking, Emotional, Tear Inducing Filled Stars! It will have you contemplating what it means to truly live, and not waste precious time. It will also make you reflect on mortality and what's really important in your life. This story was profound, and packed a powerful punch. It resonated with me and touched my heart. I highly recommend this tear jerker.

My Favorite Quotes:

"I suppose all couples feel this way at some point--that their bond is the most special, the strongest, the Greatest Love of All. Not all the time, just in those few and far between moments where you look at the person you're with and think: Yes. It's you." (eARC, Loc. 121)

~Daisy

"Then I wonder, if I knew it would turn out the same, would I want to do it all over again? This life. This body. This Lots of Cancer. I think of Jack. And realize I knew the answer before I had fully thought of the question: Yes. I would." (eARC, Loc. 3809)

~Daisy

This is a gem of a feel-good/feel-sad story about life - impending death - and overall love. 27 year old Daisy had breast cancer three years ago and was in remission. Each year with her husband Jack they would celebrate "Cancerversary" - but this year is different. The cancer is back with avengence at stage 4 and has spread throughout her body, including a tumour in her brain.

Daisy goes through the classical reactions to shock/grief, first denial (let's get another opinion), depression and finally what I want to do before I go. It suddenly hits her that her loving husband, Jack, a brilliant workaholic veterinarian who is hopeless with everyday things, will be left to cope on his own.

She decides that there are two things she wants to do before she goes:

1. See Jack graduate with another doctorate he is studying - but time may not allow this.
2. Try and find him a wife who is able to support him when she is gone.

The good news is that on the whole she is feeling pretty well and she starts thinking about where to find her successor - online dating, coffee shops, parks etc. The search is more complicated than she expected. Every woman she sees who looks to be a candidate for Jack's future partner doesn't seem to be right - married, too sensitive, too pretty, and even a possible lesbian.

While Colleen Oakey is dealing with a basically sad subject she does it in a way that the reader is rarely depressed, with many laugh-out-loud situations interlaced with the sad ones. This is a great debut novel that will stay in my memory for a long time.

PS - The story reminded me in part of the strength of Jane McGrath, wife of former star Australian cricket fast-bowler, who was able to have two healthy children while in remission and also find time to set up a foundation to raise money to provide breast-care nurses throughout Australia (100 so far). Jane also lost her fight against cancer and died 11 years later. Each year the Sydney Cricket Test has a "Jane McGrath Day" where even the stumps are pink and most spectators wear something pink (the breast cancer charity colour). Glenn, her husband, a real hunk and star sportsman, was married again 2 years later to Sara who is now a loving step-mother to Glenn's children.

My thanks to The Reading Room and the publisher for a copy of this book for review.

Disclaimer: My sincere thanks to NetGalley and Gallery, Threshold Pocket Books for providing me with a complimentary e-book copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.

My Review: When I read the synopsis of this book I was initially drawn to the premise of a wife with terminal cancer going on a journey to find someone for her husband to love when she's gone. It sounded like such a selfless journey and I expected to be a big 'ol sniveling mess when I was done.

While it did have its emotional scenes towards the end, overall it was not nearly as gut-wrenching or as dark as I was expecting for a book that deals with a woman with terminal cancer. It had an underlying sadness throughout but it was more of a look into the relationship between Daisy and Jack as they deal with such a devastating blow to their future plans and relationship. It was their relationship, as it spiraled downwards, that was the saddest (and most frustrating) part of the book for me because of the vital time they seemed to waste as they struggled to deal with the effects of the cancer.

The addition of secondary characters helped to show the far reaching effects of cancer and rounded out the story. There was Daisy's mother and her emotional outbursts and Kayleigh, Daisy's best friend, who brought a lightness, humour and honesty with how she interacted with Daisy and dealt with the diagnosis in her own way.

At first I wasn't sure how believable that portrayal of Daisy and Jack's relationship was. Daisy's focus on secretly finding Jack a future wife started off as a sweet idea but soon moved into an obsession which, as it went along, became more and more uncomfortable to read. But, as someone who also likes to be in control of her life like Daisy, I can also see how, as she lost her independence and control over her life, she clung to this issue of ensuring that Jack was taken care of when she was no longer with him. This didn't make reading about their struggles easy though. I kept wanting to shake her and say don't waste your time on this quest, spend it with Jack!

This was a good debut that focuses on the issue of finding your own happiness versus looking ahead to ensure the happiness of your loved one and gives readers an inside look at how cancer ravages not only a person's body but their emotional state and relationships.

My Rating: 3.5/5 stars

*** This book review, as well as hundreds more, can also be found on my blog, The Baking Bookworm (www.thebakingbookworm.blogspot.ca) where I also share hundreds of my favourite recipes.***

Thanks to Gallery Books via Netgalley for the free review copy in exchange for my honest opinion.

Did I like this book?

While this book did raise many questions for me, mostly of the what-would-I-do-in-her-situation variety, I can't help but feel that "Before I Go" didn't live up to its potential. The writing felt forced to me, with too many overly flowery descriptions, similes and metaphors. I was sometimes bored, especially by Daisy's focus on the minutiae. Many times I wanted to shake her and yell, "You're dying of cancer, woman, do you really want to obsess about caulking the GD windows?"

It was difficult to connect with Daisy, and even more difficult to connect with Jack, seeing as they don't communicate a whole lot. In fact, Jack spends a big chunk of the book at work, and while he expresses the need to spend time with Daisy, she ends up pushing him away. It was quite an odd dynamic, and frustrated me to no end.

Will you like this book?

I think if you are expecting something amazing, like an epic romance to outlast the ages, you might be setting the bar too high and will inevitably end up disappointed, like I was.

Will I read more by this author?

Part of my problem with this book was the writing style, so at this point I would have to say I will probably steer clear of other titles by this author.

No one wants to face their own mortality. Least of all 27-year-old Daisy who has only begun to live her life. She’s already fought, and won, one battle with breast cancer. But this time the prognosis is not good. The doctors are powerless to combat the lots of cancer that has spread to nearly every organ in her body. Before she goes, Daisy has one last wish—to find a new wife for her beloved husband, Jack.

Sound depressing? I’m not gonna lie to you, this is not an uplifting book. But is it trite? Not at all. Daisy believes in her mission. She knows she will never celebrate her thirtieth birthday or hold her newborn baby in her arms. But she doesn’t feel sorry for herself, or dwell on her misfortune. She does what she honestly believes will help her husband survive when she’s gone.

Daisy’s character is captivating. Smart, resourceful, and witty, with deep introspection. She has her moments, her temper tantrums and pity parties. Who wouldn’t in her situation? But for the most part, she handles her diagnosis with grace and humility. The turn of events at the end has the Wow Factor. Colleen Oakley has so carefully crafted her plot, I didn’t see this twist coming at all.

Rebecca Lowman is the narrator for Before I Go. I recognized her voice right away as Georgie McCool in Land Line, another close first-person narrative with an original voice. It took me a few chapters to adjust to this narrator as Daisy, but once I settled in, I enjoyed her diction immensely.
This one is not for everybody. If you can stomach reading about dying, if you’re looking for a strong female protagonist with a quirky sense of humor and a heart the size of the tumor growing in her brain, this one is for you. Before I Go gets 5 big gold stars from me.

I should just stop there, at five soul-stirring stars, but that wouldn't do this story justice. It's just that sometimes words don't come easily from a freshly-stirred soul. The experience of reading Before I Go had to settle in a bit before I could put words to it. Then all I could think of was soul-stirring. But, in fact, it is so much more.

Quite simply, it reads like an exquisitely-written, no-holds-barred, bittersweet, often funny, heart-wrenching and poignant journal account of a young woman's struggle to come to terms with her impending, inevitable, untimely death. It feels so very real, so personal, that it's hard to believe it is fiction. It evokes every emotion, every fear we have of losing what we value most - the people we love, the person we hoped to be, the dreams we might never see come true. But, while the inevitability of the end of Daisy's story can't be denied, like life, it's the journey that matters - much more than the destination. That is the theme of this story - the journey, lessons that can only be learned in your darkest hours.

I knew from the outset that this was not going to be an easy read, but I also knew it was an emotional risk well worth taking. Yes, it tackles incredibly difficult issues, painful choices and their consequences. But it does so in a way that feels so right, so complete, that the sadness is offset by the awe of the entire reading experience. I highly recommend it if your soul is in need of a serious stir...Before I Go will fill your heart and make you appreciate the gifts of everyday life and love long after you read its epilogue. I would love to hear Jack's side of the journey someday, and I look forward to Colleen's next book even as I put this one on my shelf of favorite reads.

Before I Go by Colleen Oakley is a deeply poignant debut which reminds readers that life is not only short, but precious, and we should let those around us know just how much they mean to us before it is too late. Daisy is twenty-seven years old and approaching her three-year “Cancerversary” when she is dealt with a devastating blow, her cancer has returned and has spread; she has approximately six months to live. Whilst it is difficult to know what one would do if one was given a death sentence, I am not certain Daisy’s choice would be mine, then again, thankfully I am not in Daisy’s position. Daisy has decided her husband cannot care for himself properly and she makes it her mission to find a suitable wife for Jack after she is gone. Oakley has taken a very depressing topic and created an interesting, and yes, melancholy debut novel that easily kept this reader’s attention. I found Daisy’s obsession with finding her husband a new wife deeply depressing, and while the book synopsis, in my opinion, gives way too much of the story away, I shall not. Needless to say, things do not go as Jake or Daisy plan and Oakley deftly weaves together a beautiful, at times heart-wrenching tale of a family trying to come to terms with a terminal diagnosis. Before I Go is a beautiful story and a perfect choice for book discussion groups as there is a wealth of information to be discussed and debated. I highly recommend Before I Go to book discussion groups and those who enjoy works of literary fiction.

Twenty-seven year old Daisy Richmond is caring, organized (she makes to-do lists), and devoted to her husband, Jack, a veterinarian-in-training. The couple lives in a ramshackle house in Athens, Georgia. Daisy is taking graduate courses towards her master's degree, hoping to become a community counselor. However, her future is far from assured. She had breast cancer at twenty-three and finished her course of treatment, but there is no guarantee that she will be able to beat this aggressive disease.

Colleen Oakley's "Before I Go" could have been maudlin, but the first-time novelist wisely keeps the narrative's tone as light as possible. Daisy is bright, insightful, and funny. She is so unselfish that she embarks on a project to find a suitable second wife for Jack, just in case. Her plan is that if "she goes," her spouse will have someone solicitous, affectionate, and competent to take care of him. Daisy receives help from her flaky best friend, Kayleigh, her sounding board and confidante since childhood.

The author takes us on a poignant and heart-wrenching journey with Daisy, who tries to stay positive throughout her ordeal. Her mission to find the right woman for Jack does not go as smoothly as she had hoped. Moreover, even if she were to succeed in her unusual quest, is she ready to let go of Jack? Oakley's prose and dialogue flow smoothly, and the plot is beautifully paced; the author strikes just the right balance between humor and pathos. "Before I Go" is an engrossing exploration of the unpredictability of life and the complexity of human relationships.

Daisy has been given months to live. But at twenty-seven she still has so much left to do. One of those things is to make sure that her husband, an absent minded professor, will be taken care of after she dies. So with the help of her best friend, Daisy sets out to find him the perfect 2nd wife. But as time goes by, she realizes that this might not be what she ultimately wants. Can she halt the process her actions have set in motion?

This is one of those magical stories that stays with the reader long after the last chapter has been read. I'm not normally the type to read a story that will make me cry. But this was definitely worth the tears. The author has the gift of drawing emotions out of the reader they didn't expect. The story touched my heart and my mind. While it definitely has comedic moments, it also leads the reader on an introspective journey into what life means and how to grasp each moment as if it might be your last. The author paints a realistic picture of a flawed, but beautiful marriage. It was refreshing to see this type of marriage portrayed in a book. This is the type of book that will grab your heart if you allow it to. I was so swept up into the story that I might have missed some writing mistakes. But to me, this is the sign of a good writer. I would highly recommend this book to anyone and will be adding this copy to my library.

I received this book free of charge from Gallery Book in exchange for my honest review.

Oh this is just the most heartbreakingly wonderful novel I have read in quite some time. I sat down one Sunday afternoon intending to tackle a few introductory chapters and lost myself. It is a rare author who can balance tragedy and comedy so artfully.

In "before i go", Ms. Oakley's debut novel, we meet the irrepressible Daisy. Daisy is 27, is a breast cancer survivor, a dedicated graduate student, a devoted daughter, a loyal friend and, most of all, a loving wife. Our Daisy is also a creature of order and habit. So, when Daisy learns that her cancer has returned and she has possibly less than six months to live, Daisy turns her attention to doing what she does best - making sure those she leaves behind will be okay without her. Yes, the story is genuinely heartbreaking but it is also delightfully funny and inspiring. And, moreover, the story never falls into slapstick territory, it remains touching and believable throughout, even to the devastating end.

Highly Recommended - I just cannot recommend this book highly enough, it is a (tragically) humorous story with engaging characters, deft pacing and really solid storytelling.

I loved this book! This is one of those books where you know the ending when you begin, and yet, by the end it feels like you have forgotten that you already knew the ending. Daisy has a charming way of sneaking into your heart when you aren't looking and taking up residence there. Her sarcastic wit and brutal honesty strikes a cord in me that I didn't expect. And Jack! Everyone needs a Jack in their life! Bless his heart, he loves Daisy so much! We all need a Jack to love us in our unlovable moments. A dear friend and fellow book reviewer warned me that this was the kind of book I would need tissues for but I didn't listen. My husband discovered me late last night sobbing like a baby over the contents of this book. I think he thought I had grown another head. I tried to explain it to him but he just didn't get it. "They are just fictional characters!" he cried. To which I promptly responded, "Yet my heart breaking is so very real!" His response was just to roll his eyes at me. Before I go is just one of those books. You know the kind, those that are so heartbreakingly real that you will likely never be capable of reading it again but the book will forever hold a piece of your heart. The kind of book that leaves you thinking about the heartache it created for weeks to come. I would highly recommend this book to anyone, especially those dealing with grief or cancer in their lives. Before I go gives a beautiful yet realistic sneak peek into the world of someone that is faced with their own mortality and those that care about them most. However, be forewarned, you may find that you are not the advanced griever that you think you are. Book rating: 5/5

"Before I go" is a story about Daisy and Jack, a young married couple who have celebrated three years of Daisy being cancer free. Daisy is planning a trip for their Happy Cancerversary vacation and after a routine checkup, her Doctor calls and asks her to come into his office so they can talk. Daisy discovers her cancer is back and this time she is Stage Four. The cancer has spread every where and into her brain. The Doctor says she has four maybe six months to live.

This is such a well written story about terminal illness and the stages the patient and family go through. I thought it was too cute that Daisy and her friend Kayleigh were signing up for online match sites so they could find a new wife for Jack. Daisy discovers along the way that she really doesn't want Jack to find a new wife, she wants to keep him to herself for however long they have together.

The ending is sweet as Jack and Kayleigh form a friendship after Daisy has passed on. They couldn't stand each other before, but found a common thread that allowed them to support each other as they grieved for someone they both loved.

I highly recommend this read. This story should be read on a rainy or snowy day with comfy blankets and tea. You will find yourself laughing, crying and feeling sad.

Cancer is a wicked 6 letter word that can change living in fantasy to quickly living in reality. Before I Go is the journey of Daisy a cancer survivor whose cancer has come back that train wrecks her, her marriage, her dreams, and her friendships. Told in Daisy’s voice, you get the sense of the loneliness, the lack of control that cancer brings to everyone in its tracks. Daisy who is a type a personality, who lives by the list and lives by I can fix it mode suddenly finds she is not living period. Her need to control takes the reader on journey of the anxiety it creates it her life and her journey to accept it. Her marriage to Jack is strong, but is it strong enough as two of them fight their own battles that cancer has waged.

The character development is so good. Daisy goes back to her past with her own family, the death of her father and how her mother coped, you can see how that plays a big part in Daisy’s story. What she discovers about herself and trusting those that care for her the most. It’s a story that will stay with you and give you some understanding of the reality of what war some are waging in fighting cancer.

A special thank you, Gallery Books
and NetGalley for an ARC in exchange for an honest review

Daisy had cancer.

Daisy beat cancer.

Or so she thought. The cancer is back. She's going to die.

Daisy decides she needs to find a wife for her husband Jack. She feels Jack isn't capable of taking care of himself. He leaves socks on the floor. He can't really cook. He's messy. Meanwhile, Daisy is neat and organized. She needs to find a woman who is like her.

Will Daisy find someone for Jack before she dies?

This was a tough book to read, only because I knew Daisy would die. I get attached to characters, guys. It also made me afraid, because it reminded me how cancer can just appear in someone. Anyone. And sometimes there is nothing you can do about it. However, I did like the book, because the writing was superb, and I liked Daisy's character. I would drive Daisy insane, because I am not organized. I also found her to be pretty dang selfless wanting to find a replacement wife for her husband. It would KILL me to picture someone else with my husband, hence why I could never be a sister wife. I'm an only child and I do NOT like to share.

A great book! I especially liked the epilogue even though it made me tear up.

When Daisy, diagnosed with "lots of Cancer", realizes she really is going to die this time, she knows one thing - Jack needs a wife and she is going to find him one.

The process of online dating for your husband proves to be daunting. Do you choose someone who's too pretty, who has the same interests as your husband or someone who is different so their personalities compliment each other? Then Daisy's mental attitude about her illness causes the distance between Jack and her to grow, and she struggles with wanting to connect with him while at the same time thinking she needs to be preparing him for her departure. My favorite line: "And I know it's because something in me is mending, at the exact same time that it's breaking."

The struggles a couple's relationship endures when faced with such a stressful life situation were very real. Hardship can bring a couple closer or drive a wedge between them. Ultimately, does love conquer all or does the cancer win? I really enjoyed finding out.

Overall, a really good book. I would not call it a tear-jerker like P.S. I Love You but still a good book. I was expecting to cry my eyes out. This did not happen. So when I got to the very last few pages, I was surprised when I did feel myself tear up some and shed tears. I was not expecting this. I mean I did like the story and the characters but I never got too emotional. In fact, at times I thought Daisy was mean spirited towards her husband. Although, I could understand her lashing out at him. I still did not feel like he deserved the anger. Jack was nothing but a sweet heart towards Daisy. This may have had a little to do with why I did not get so emotional reading this book. Daisy was human with the emotions she was experiencing but she kept herself at a distance some. Before I Go is a nice first showing for new author, Colleen Oakley.

I wasn't sure what to expect with this book, but it was very good. The writing style is great! You follow Daisy as she learns that her cancer has come back and it is terminal. Not long after figuring out that she is in fact going to die, so determines to find her amazing husband someone to love when she passes. The whole premise of the book sounds a bit depressing, but I was surprised that it's really not. Don't get me wrong, there are many moments when you will need a box of tissues, but just as many moments that will make you smile and laugh. Daisy is written in such a real and natural way, I felt like she was real person and I was truly insider her head for this journey. The main characters (Daisy, her best friend, and her husband) are easy to relate to and really endearing in all of their human grief, silliness, and love. Overall, this is a great read, that will make you cry, but also make you smile and enjoy the hope that love brings!

I loved this book, until I got to the last page. I needed resolution. I need to know if something happens between the 2 people conversing at the end. I was swept along as poor Daisy had to face her impending death, and watch her great love for Jack actually alienate this happily married couple from one another. Daisy desperately wants to find a new wife to replace her when she is no longer around to take care of and love Jack. I know what I wanted to happen, and I think it may happen, but the end didn't quite tell me whether or not my hunch was right. I am always aggravated when authors do that, and don't follow up with a sequel or, at least, bring back the characters about whom I wonder, even as minor characters in a future novel. I was so upset that I took a star from this, otherwise, five star novel. It's not terribly maudlin. I didn't cry, but my attention was piqued from the first til the last page.

Daisy has Lots of Cancer. After being cancer-free for nearly 4 years, she learns that a tumor in her breast has spread to the rest of her body. She doesn't want to die but more than that, she doesn't want to leave her husband Jack on his own. Who will cook for him? Who will pick up and wash his pile of dirty socks? Daisy wants to find Jack a new wife before she dies. She enlists the help of her best friend and they secretly begin the hunt for Jack's new wife. But the closer Daisy comes to finding a new wife for Jack, the more she realizes that she's not sure that's what she wants. Somehow, through all of this, Daisy has pushed Jack away.
Though this book is obviously sad, there's also a lot of humor to it. I didn't expect to laugh so much about a book about terminal cancer. The humor definitely helped lighten the mood and keep things less dreary for the reader. I highly recommend it.

Oh how I loved this book. When I finished the final page and closed it, I just wanted to hold it close for a while. Be warned, there are sad, sad times in this book but there are also many happy and inspiring moments. We know from practically page one that the main character, Daisy, is dying of cancer. She wants to find her husband, Jack, a "replacement" for her when she is gone. It has to be just the right person to take her place. A woman comes into her life who she thinks might meet her requirements. Without telling any more of the story, I will just say it's beautifully written, sad sometimes, happy sometimes. Lots of "food for thought" on our relationships and our future. This book will stay with me for a long time.

"Before I Go" by Colleen Oakley is a book that had me in tears through most of it. But, many times I was laughing through those tears. It's a well written tear jerker; the kind of chic lit many of us in the chic category long for. The book has wonderful flow and characters who are skillfully crafted.

It's a twist on the story of a woman facing her own death. Instead of focusing on her end, she focuses on how her poor, helpless husband will be able to survive without her. So we follow Daisy as she deals with her Stage 4 cancer while searching for her husband's next wife. But, does she really want the husband she adores to fall in love again? It all leads to a very unexpected story that left me captivated by it.

It's a book that hooked me from the beginning and had me turning pages. You just can't put this book down.

"Before I Go" is a beautiful love story. Daisy Richmond, a young woman who had beaten cancer 4 years earlier, learns that cancer, "lots of cancer", has come back with a vengeance. Daisy has always been a girl with a plan, a list-maker, and she goes on a quest to find a woman for her husband, Jack, to be with when she is gone. But her plan leaves her questioning her marriage, her love for Jack, and his love for her. It's an amazing story of illness, undying love and devotion and sacrifice that will keep you entangled in its pages from beginning to end. The raw, complex emotions author ,Colleen Oakley, was able to convey made it impossible to stop reading. Wish I could read the same story from Jack's eyes now. The whole book was bittersweet and uplifting at the same time. I loved it!!

I was given a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. To read more reviews like this one, check out Obsessive Book Nerd!

After the first two chapters of Before I Go, I was emotionally spent. I don't know much about cancer, so reading from the point of view of a cancer patient was challenging. Not only was Daisy a cancer survivor at the beginning of the book, she quickly found out her cancer was back, and the inner turmoil was difficult to wade through.

I can’t decide if I truly loved Daisy. Daisy was strong and handled the cards she was dealt better then I think I would if something like this happened to me. I can only hope that I could have the strength she did. However, at times she felt disconnected. Maybe a result of finding out you're going to lose your battle with cancer, I’m not sure. I did however love her and Jack’s relationship. I loved that she described common issues and conversations that all young married couples have. It felt so real. I would chuckle and think, “Yeah, I know that conversation well”.

I had a very hard time getting through this book. Truthfully, I skimmed through most of it and skipped forward several times. Which is something I never do. The story was just so depressing that I had a very hard time staying motivated to read it. The book was written beautifully, the subject matter was depressing. I’m all in favor for a sad beginning, middle or even sometimes ending, but the whole book was just too much for me. I’m the sure the author intended the end to be sad but uplifting, but I just couldn't find anything but sadness.

What freaked me out the most was a young woman, 22 years old with breast cancer 5 years later and in remission for 4 years and now at age 27 getting a death diagnosis that cancer had returned in between doctor checkups and her own vigilance so aggressively and with no symptoms leaving her with less than 4 months to live - that is terrifying. In comparison to that shocker the story of young Daisy trying to cope by finding someone to love her husband in the little time she has was rather unreadable. It probably didn't help that I kept thinking of the Doris Day - Rock Hudson - Tony Randell comedy where Rock is married to Doris (Tony Randell is the comedy foil) and Rock is a hypochondriac who thinks he's dying, and attempts to find a future husband for Doris, with accompanying hilarity.

Our biggest fear, hearing that you have cancer. Then hearing that you will ultimately die in a set amount of time. (I don't want to give too much away). I loved Daisy's voice and found her saying and thinking things that I could imagine I would say and do in the same circumstances. As I read, I selfishly thought that I was happy it was her and not me going through this horrible struggle. This is very well-written and has an understandable progression, filled with humor, angst, insecurities, miscommunication and most of all, love.

A difficult journey to take with Daisy and her husband (and family) but one worth taking.

Okay, I get it. The weeping. The FAULT IN OUR STARS comparisons (which really make sense). The actual whole cancer thing. But don’t dismiss Colleen Oakley’s BEFORE I GO as just a “cancer book.” Because it’s so much more than that.

It’s a love story. Between Daisy and Jack, who met when he rescued her from a bumblebee, and are opposites in so many ways. It’s about Jack’s socks and Daisy’s OCD tendencies, and crooked teeth and laugh lines.

It’s the story of a marriage. It’s about a home two people have built together and the things that bind them and the things that fall apart. It’s about the widening space between two people on the bed they’ve shared for so many years. And about what has to happen to close that gap.

It’s a story about mortality. A story about what we’d do if faced with the impossible. About decisions made and regrets to suffer. About the things we do and the things we let go. And about what we decide we want to leave behind, if given that choice.

It’s a character study. One about a person, who, like all of us, is inevitably flawed. Who, faced with that impossible challenge, is doing her best. Despite being cranky. Who makes mistakes and realizes after the fact and nearly loses it all before she really has to. Who has good intentions and terrible execution and still cracks jokes right till the end. But in the end, it’s about a woman who hopes the best for the ones she loves, even if that’s not best for her.

It’s catharsis. Yes, you’ll need a full box of tissues. Let’s get that right out of the way. Because even if you’ve never stared down your own mortality, you’ve been in Daisy’s shoes — and lost your balance. And maybe, if you’re lucky, like Daisy, you’ve managed to grasp on to something and right yourself, too.

So yes, Colleen Oakley’s BEFORE I GO is a cancer book. But it’s so much more than that.

This was an absolutely amazing and touching story of a young couple whose lives have been altered by a terrifying reality that belongs to so many people, cancer. I could not believe it when I found out this was Colleen's debut novel. The writing was superb, the characters highly developed and the story line gripping. Colleen writes this story with such raw truth that it cuts the reader to the core. I found myself guessing where the story was going to go until the very end. I have read other novels that have the same story line, but none have taken the direction this one did. Colleen brought a refreshing twist to a common theme. I highly recommend this read.

Can't believe I had this book on my "to read" pile for so long. It was a wonderful story dealing with a difficult subject. Cancer and dying. When Daisy gets the new that her breast cancer has returned and is stage 4 she is bitter and resentful. She then decides that her husband Jack will need someone to take care of him. Always a list maker, Daisy adds find a wife for Jack and sets out to get a replacement for herself. When she finds the perfect candidate, she suddenly realizes she wants to keep him for herself. This books bounces from highs to lows in Daisy's life and poor Jack is adrift in disbelief and uncertainty. I love how Daisy thinks she has a handle on her short future but discovers that family and friends are the key to life. Wonderful.

It's rare that I ever rate a novel with a perfect score, but this one was absolutely wonderful. It is an easy read and the writing flows together, and I was completely drawn into the story from the first page. I will definitely be waiting for Colleen Oakley's next novel. It is written completely in first person, except for the epilogue, and the plot was realistic. I read this book in two days, and not once did I think, "I wish this would wrap up already." I wish I could think of a better category/genre for this book besides "general nonfiction," but that is exactly what it is. It could be considered a drama, but it is very lighthearted for being a novel about cancer. Regardless, I highly recommend this book!

This is one heart-wringer of a novel. I'm one of those who's survived my own cancer, and a story like this does touch my heart. The wife character is a true winner and her impending demise is a real downer. Yet the book is actually inspirational and ultimately a feel-good novel. It is a bit of a tearjerker for us guys, but the writing style is strong and effective.

Check out the full review at Kritters Ramblings

As told above in the synopsis, Daisy has been living cancer free for a few years and isn't prepared for the news that the doctor will give that gives her a time limit on her life. After taking the news in she realizes that her dying would leave her husband alone and she believes that he will be in desperate need of a new companion - so she is on a mission.

The premise of the story got me and I was intrigued as to how a woman could face death while trying to find her spouse happiness after she is gone. Although I found the story to drag a little and Daisy's complaints were getting repetitive, I still read the book quickly and wanted desperately to find out how it would end.

This moving and deeply personal novel is a wonderful read. Watching Daisy as she tries to come to terms with a terminal cancer diagnosis by searching for her replacement is heartrending. Watching her turn away from Jack, her mother, and her best friend shows how isolating such a diagnosis can be. As she fixates on Jack's graduation to make all their years of sacrifice worth it, you can feel her pain that she herself will not complete her degree, or work in her field, or have children. The book is sad but redemptive as Daisy and Jack stumble through her remaining time and work to just carve out a space to be together. Highly recommended.

Simple, honest, and sincere. Heartbreakingly so, without being maudlin. The emotions it touched are visceral and I had tears in my eyes over and over throughout the book, while I inwardly grinned at the comedic twists life throws our way even in death. The main message I took away from this book, other than I need to buy a new box of tissues, is to communicate what's important to you, no matter how hard it is to get the words out. Death is inevitable for all of us, but when one knows there is an accelerated deadline, the compulsion to live each day as if it's your last take on a whole new meaning. I applaud her debut novel and am looking forward to Oakley's next book.

What would you do if you found you had stage four cancer and only a few months to live? This novel addresses this situation in a quirky and delightful way. Daisy, a psychology graduate student, has battled cancer already once in her life, but when she discovers it has returned--and spread to vital organs--she focuses--instead of the meaning of live or such similar sentimentality--on finding her husband a new wife. Daisy is an easily likeable character and you go through the novel, hoping her terminal diagnosis in one big mistake. You also find yourself frustrated with her because instead of spending time with her husband, she distances herself from him in her pursuit of finding him a new wife. I thought the author did an excellent job in handling this topic in a fresh and sometimes funny way. I look forward to reading this author's next novel and hope the wait is not too long.

Could. Not. Put. This. Book. Down.
I found myself putting off daily tasks just to pick this up and devour it! This is the first novel I have read by Colleen and will not be the last. Her writing style is beautiful and reads effortlessly. The story is a hurricane of emotional ups and downs centering around a 27 year old girl battling with breast cancer. The story, although sad is compelling and beautiful. It takes me really loving a book to take the time out of my busy life to write a review, so yes, I LOVED this novel and highly recommend it. I typically put books in my little library in front of my house after I read them, but this is a book I will be hanging onto to read again. Bravo and 5 stars!

I am a crying wreck after reading this book. It is definitely a tear jerker! I thought it was funny in a weird way (what the blurb on the back called "gallows humor") but sometimes I got really frustrated with the way the narrator, Daisy, pushed everyone away. Her relationships are kind of strange-I didn't like how she treated her mother and the best friend Kayleigh floats in and out of the plot as needed by the author. While Daisy talks about Pamela as being too perfect, I thought Daisy was irritatingly perfect as well (see the Internet article "Flaws Only a Protagonist Can Have") . A good book for the mood I was in and for getting some tears out of the system.

This is such a beautiful, heart-breaking story. The characters are very real - they are your sister, your brother, your daughter, your best friend. The story is written from the point of view of a young married woman who is dying of cancer. Her thoughts and perspective are so well portrayed, I felt as though I was right there, going through it with her.

There is so much raw emotion, especially in the way she talks about her relationship with her young husband. They are such a sweet, endearing young couple, who are very much in love.

I advise reading this one with a tissue handy.

Colleen Oakley has tackled one of the most difficult topics known to women: terminal breast cancer. And yet, she has succeeded in doing it with humor and grace! I fell in love with her main character, Daisy, with all of her strong emotions, honesty, and passion for her marriage. In this story, Daisy decides she's going to try to find the perfect wife for her husband, Jack, so he will be taken care of after she's gone. Between the medical and romantic plot twists, I couldn't wait to find out what would happen next. The book had me laughing and crying, often at the same time. A great debut novel from an author with soul. (Note: I got an advanced review copy in exchange for an honest review.)

Having been married for almost 40 years, the premise of this book intrigued me. My husband and I have often joked that he better pass first, because he'd be a wreck if left behind. Although I'm almost twice the age of the character Daisy there is much she processes that I could relate to. Not only does she deal with her own issues, but she's trying to ensure that Jack will be okay after she's gone. He doesn't have a clue about running a household, and at one point I wished she would teach him—like one of the college classes he taking, only more essential. I often found myself stopping reading to reflect on how I would handle a situation that she's dealing with. Even when I didn't agree with her on a particular viewpoint or decision, it made me appreciate all the more how each one of us faces death from a unique perspective—and each of those perspectives is valid and meaningful.

I will definitely look for other stories written by this author.

This book follows the struggle of a young woman with infinite potential who must face her impending mortality along with the ones she loves. While the subject matter of this book is sad and potentially depressing, Oakley somehow manages to invoke humor and lightheartedness along the way. The characters are not perfect and glamorous nor are they flawed in predictable ways. By the end of the book, I felt that I knew the characters very well and was moved by the writing. This book is not a light beach read but there are certainly funny scenes and humorous dialogue throughout.

At the age of 27, Daisy is facing a death sentence because of reoccurring breast cancer that has metabolized throughout her body. Leaving her husband alone is just not an option for her, so Daisy embarks on a plan to find Jack a new wife. A poignant, beautiful story that includes all of the emotions you might feel as you are facing imminent death, the book is well paced and the characters are both realistic and believable. This emotionally charged, well written story is the debut novel for author Colleen Oakley, whom I look forward to reading more from in the future.

Definetly a tear jerker! Before I Go has your emotions all over the place and makes you feel like you are right there as a part of Daisy and Jack's family. You find yourself agreeing with the decisions but wanting to scream No!!! at the same time. This book made me wonder over and over what decisions I would make along this horrible path Daisy is down. One minute you are laughing out loud, the next it is hard to hold in the anger. I really enjoyed (yes, I enjoy these types of novels!) this book! Well written!!

Beautiful and heartbreakingly sad. At age 27, with her whole life ahead of her, Daisy has learned that her cancer has returned. Aggressively. How should you live your life when you know there is not much left of it? We may think we know, but it probably wouldn't work that way. As she struggles with her own mortality, Daisy decides she should find a new wife for her husband Jack, so he won't be alone after she dies. There is humor mixed with the sadness weaving a story that I could not put down. I received this book free to review from Netgalley and I highly recommend it.

This book literally had me in tears every other page I felt. This book is so beautifully written it touched my soul. Everything that Dasey goes through I felt as well. It took me about 2 weeks to read because of work but also because every time I sat down to read it I was a blubbering fool with a headache ;) I've also lost over 3 family members to cancer recently so this was a look into their side of dying.

Truly a great read. Don't pass this up

What would you do if you were given 6 mos to live with a diagnosis of terminal illness? What would your thoughts be as to what to do with that time? That's what young, fairly newly married Daisey must deal with. Would you worry about what will happen to the people left behind? Colleen Oakley brings you into Daisey's life and her way of dealing with this situation. Ms Oakley draws you in so that, not in a morbid way, you want to see the outcome. Sometimes makes you smile, sometimes makes you want to cry.

Now that she's four years past her breast cancer, Daisy and her husband, Jack, are finally ready to reclaim their lives. He's about to graduate from veterinary school, she's well into her graduate studies in psychology after delaying school when she was sick, she's happily renovating her fixer upper dream home, and they're even starting to think about a baby. She barely pays attention to her four year cancer check up - but then the bottom falls out from under her. The cancer is not only back, it's "everywhere" - it's not treatable - and she's going to die soon.

So what does she do, in the time she has left?

I picked up this book because I saw the comparisons to JoJo Moyes' "Me Before You," which is still one of the best reads I've had in the last several years. I know there is a lot of "dying porn" literature out there - the whole Love Story genre of young women succumbing tragically; I don't actually like this genre so much, but the reviews made me think this one was like Moyes' book, a cut above.

It was, and it wasn't. This is a well written book, and Ms. Oakley has some talent. I liked Daisy. But there was a flaw at the premise, and for my taste, the writer ultimately couldn't resolve it. The core issue here is that when Daisy and Jack first get the news, they go into denial. That's probably realistic. But it lasts for a long time - a very, vey long time - and ultimately, reading a book about a couple who are frittering away the last few months they have together just gets frustrating. There is also a very strange sub-plot where Daisy first becomes determined to find Jack a new mate (I find this really unbelievable; they've been married for just a few years, and he's a handsome young veterinarian; I don't believe that she doesn't think he could find someone on his own) - and then it veers into a question of whether he is cheating on her.

The book raises really difficult questions of what do you do when you just have a few months left to live, instead of your whole life - and then doesn't really have the nerve to answer them. So, here's my final recommendation: if you like this genre, the beautiful death genre, then pick up this book - it's well written and easy to read. But if you're looking for a really standout book, or real insight into the hard questions of life and death, for me, those questions aren't really addressed here.

What would you think and what would you do if you were a twenty-something newlywed and diagnosed with cancer? This isn't just a little cancer, either. This is a recurrence, and it's discovered on the third "cancerversary" of the first diagnosis. It's bad this time, too - stage four, six months estimated to live. Hopes as a couple, thoughts of having children one day, are gone.

That's what Daisy Richmond is facing. She and her husband are both students. She is a graduate student in psychology; her husband Jack is a veterinary student striving for his DVM and a PhD in veterinary science. Jack is scheduled to graduate soon, but is it soon enough for Daisy?

Daisy and Jack face many problems as a couple. She so desperately wants him to graduate while she still lives and is well enough to see him graduate that they quarrel about whether or not he should go to class or go to his practicum or be with her when he feels he should be. Jack, though highly intelligent, does not have the faintest idea how to manage a household (cooking, cleaning, anything domestic). Daisy even tries to look for a woman to take her place in Jack's life after she isn't able to do for Jack anymore.

This story is told from Daisy's point of view in monthly increments. Readers learn about all that Daisy goes through just to buy herself a little more time with a reasonable quality of life. The tone and style are fresh and young and a bit biting - almost like laughing to keep from crying. Oakley creates Daisy as someone who wanted to learn her lesson from the first battle with cancer; Daisy eats only healthful foods, and when she does have a craving for fast-food she cannot eat it when she sits down to do so.

Though the style and point of view are indeed fresh and twenty-first century, I, as a baby boomer who read Norma Klein's SUNSHINE in my twenties, saw some similarities between these two works.

I found the female character very interesting--very well written. She shows wit and pluck, despite her circumstances. I could easily identify with her need for order and list making. Growing up with an unpredictable caretaker, one learns the comfort of certainty, and this was so well brought out in the description of the character's childhood. Loved the potential at the end (won't give it away!)

Just too sad with nothing uplifting about the story. I almost feel guilty saying that the story was a bore- just couldn't stand the horror of her being so alone - great her husband is fixing the house- what good does that do?
Better "cancer-death " books out there.

This is a sweet story of a woman and her husband dealing with and preparing for her death. Of course there are sad moments, raw moments, but overall I think this is a love story. Reading the synopsis, I thought it might be funnier and more light hearted, but this book leans toward the melancholy. The author doesn't shy away from the realities of a cancer diagnosis, from confusion to puke to emotional turmoil. Thanks Net Galley!!

Finished. Was just too fluffy. Too chick-lit for me. If you like that sort of novel this might be for you, but I felt it fell really flat in describing what someone going though terminal cancer would be feeling. Too much drama with her husband, which felt really contrived and weak and not deep but shallow. Just, not really my kind of book. And I hate saying that as I feel that each author does their best to write a fantastic book. At the end she thanks her sister in the acknowledgements for being the person she writes for, I am guessing her sister and I ate not the same. Maybe a 20 something who wants a fluffy read for an afternoon at the beach? I guess I couldn't believe the story, so didn't feel at all what the five star reviewers thought. Sad idea for a story? Yup. Was I ever sad in the book? One sentence in the final chapter. And I am a sappy one. Cry at hallmark commercials and stuff.

Even though I knew the circumstance of the book and knew it was going to be sad; I felt as if I would have done the same thing knowing what the outcome would be. When you are married or in love, your spouse or lover is more important than life itself. I totally understood both characters. It was well written and a true love story. It was a great read. Kudos to the author.

Before I Go by Colleen Oakley is about a married couple, Daisy and Jack. Daisy, age 27, has Cancer and she needs to find someone to be there for Jack if her condition goes from bad to worse. I loved this book! People Magazine gave it a high rating and they were right! It goes quickly, keeping my interest from beginning to end. The story is told from Daisy's view for the most part.

Heart wrenching is right, my heart just broke for Daisy and Jack while I read this book. It was a beautifully written story that touched me in so many ways. Grab a box of tissues, your favorite cozy blanket, and loose yourself in Before I Go.

I'm going to need recovery time after this book. I went through a lot of emotions. I was mad at Daisy for tryin to find him someone. I thought it was a ridiculous idea and actually had anxiety towards the end. I was waiting for her to explode on Jack. But it all came together in the end. Excellent read if you like tearjerkers

The best story-telling gives us a way to explore pain without having to live it. And it's in that exploration where we understand ourselves better and feel more connected to the people around us. We allow ourselves to stop and feel. It's catharsis. And that's what BEFORE I GO is for me. It was a release of emotion that scared me. And there was no better way to do that reading this book.

Oakley can really tell a story! I expected the book to be depressing, but it really wasn't. Oakley handled the subject matter in a very straightforward way and the emotions that were brought in seemed reasonable, not morbid.

The premise of the story is a little tricky, but credit the author for never taking a false step. It really grabs you about 50 pages in when Daisy is diagnosed with cancer and doesn't let go until the pitch-perfect ending. Each time I felt like the story might veer off course, the author found the emotional truth in the situation, always nailing the right balance of humor and heartache. Highly recommended.

I liked the idea of the book. I also enjoyed the character's journey from the beginning of the book to the end. At times it felt a bit repetitive and a tad long. I am not sure how realistic the book is. Take it for what it is: a piece of fiction.

This is one of the best books I have read in quite a while! I probably read one or two books a week and I simply could not put this down! I loved that it was set in Atlanta and plot.......well I won't give it away. You won't be disappointed.

The dialog and the characters are wonderful and although this is a sad love story it pulls you in and makes you care about Daisy and want to keep reading. I enjoyed her writing and look forward to other books from her.

I thought this book was going to be another typical love story, but I was clearly wrong. I didn't just fall in love with the characters, Daisy and Jack, I connected and related to them. I found myself so anxious to find out what Daisy's next step was going to be, that I had to control and slow myself from skipping to the next page. I found myself questioning what would I do in her situation. The ending had a really nice, unexpected twist. This book mad me laugh, cry, and hope to find that kind of love. Enjoy!

I can't describe the emotions this book caused me. I felt like it was really me getting the diagnosis, and how she handled it is exactly how I feel I would have. During hard times I tend to push people away, and this book really set home why I should not do that. My grandpa had a cancer scare, and now so many things that he said and did make sense. Highly recommended that everyone read this!

This was a somewhat interesting but predictable first-person account of a woman who finds out that her cancer has returned. She may have just a few months to live. It was interesting to read as she goes through the predictable grief process and decides to find a wife for her soon-to-be-widowed husband. The story didn't hold my interest very well, but it may be just because I couldn't relate to the characters.

The solid character for me is her husband. I found it difficult to relate to the school teacher friend who has a habit of dating high school students. That's too close to real life in our community. The language throughout is also crude for those who like to avoid it, but there was no offensive sexual content that I can remember.

This is a book that I am glad that I read, but it isn't one of those books that I will remember forever.

A great read from cover to cover. You quickly immerse yourself in Daisy's life and struggles. "Lots of cancer" is never anything you want to hear. She buckles down and does what she feels needs to be done in the short time she has left. Tearful? Yes but there are plenty of laughs along the way as well. Great weekend read with a warm blanket and glass of wine - oh and a tissue or two.

Great book! I just went on to see what other books of hers to order and found out this was her first. I could not put it down. I read a lot of books and this is not the typical type of book for me, but I am glad that I did. It is sad but not depressing. It helped me to understand what the person going through cancer really has to deal with besides the actual cancer itself. Colleen manages to do all this with eloquence and humor.

Beautiful heart touching debut novel by Colleen Oakley. I thoroughly enjoyed the book although I didn't agree with all of Daisy's decisions or actions in the story I could definitely relate to her character and pain. Make sure you have your tissue handy. Can't wait for Colleen's next book!

I was tearful right away and definitely thought the story was going in a different direction and it surprised me a very touching story that could be relatable to those affected by a loved one dealing with cancer.

I could not love this book more. I could not put it down. It was so wonderfully written and I loved the characters and the story. Somehow she managed to make such a difficult subject enjoyable to read about. Funny and sweet, and then the ending brought out every emotion in me. What a wonderful book!

Fantastic read, I found it to be funny, profound, and sad all at the same time. It really makes you examine your own thoughts on the subject. Make sure you have a large box of tissues at your disposal!

Just an absolutely beautiful book. The daunting subject and desperately sad underpinnings of the story are lifted up by Oakley's shimmering humanity and humour and the novel takes flight. Her bright crisp prose is authentic and haunting. I loved it.

I expected it to be good but not this good. This is not a book about choosing a new mate for your husband before you die. It is about getting to know the heart of someone who is very relatable, and is dying. It is funny, and real and sweet.

I did not like this book at all! It hit too close to home for me, having had breast cancer and having some of the same concerns as Daisy about how her husband would manage when she died. I found it to be pretty depressing and did not like how she let the cancer take over her life instead of making the most of the time she did have. It does have some redeeming qualities such as a solid marriage for a change and some humor. I would rather read just about anything instead of this one, just sayin'. If you really want to get insight in what women think about who are fighting cancer, then read this.