The Fourfold Path for Healing Ourselves and Our World

We have used this book at our church for summer reading and discussions. Our priest has paired it with videos with Desmond Tutu that have deepened the experience of understanding what forgiving is truly about.

This book speaks of humanity at large and how individuals play a small yet indispensable role in creating a world that refuses to be led by pain and fear. It is for the offender and the offended both. Excellent read.

I admire Bishop Tutu and his good works on behalf of South Africa and people everywhere. This book and its theme helped me on a personal level by causing me to pause and think about my needs to forgive and be forgiven. I am a sounder person having read this book and I say thank you to Bishop Tutu and his coauthor for writing such a meaningful work.

This is an excellent book about learning to forgive. Read it slowly one chapter at a time. Thought provoking questions at end of each chapter for discussion or reflection. Excellent for group to read and discuss together.

I found this book to be very simply written for anyone to understand. We can all identify with the need for forgiveness and admire and emulate those among us who have publicly forgiven people who have hurt them. What this book does is give an explanation of how to address the hurts we experience in life, either large or small, and grow toward a freedom and peace in which our wounds can be healed.

The examples of forgiveness put forth in the book are beautifully presented as are the struggles, pain, and work necessary to reach the moments of forgiveness. The book, based on personal experience (especially of the crimes of apartheid in South Africa) and a real belief in "shared humanity" (which is a concept that many of us espouse), presents a guide for all those who feel the need to forgive or be forgiven. Meditations, Journaling, Summaries, and Practices are also offered by the authors which enhance the presentation of the material they wish to share.

The intention of the authors is to assist others to recognize forgiveness as the basis for individual peace and ultimately world peace. If we start to choose the path of Forgiveness as opposed to the path of Revenge/Retaliation, there is hope that we can live in harmony and build a better world. This is a premise that deserves attention in today's atmosphere of terrorism, payback, and war.

This book was given to my husband and me as a bon voyage gift when we moved to South Africa last month. I loved the book so much, I bought 4 copies as gifts. Very powerful and great spiritual exercises.

This is the best book on the path of forgiveness that I've seen because it deals with why both the forgiver and the forgiven need this kind of healing. It also has specific practice suggestions for making forgiveness happen.

An excellent explanation of how to address the sometimes difficult need to work through forgiveness. I used this as a basis for an adult education class and had the highest turn out for any of our Sunday morning adult education classes.

I really wanted to like this audio book much more than I did, as I am a fan of Bishop Tutu as a public speaker and peacemaker.

I wonder whether I would have liked this book MORE if Bishop Tutu were the one narrating the book; however, some of the case studies mentioned in the book were so tragic, I found it emotionally difficult to continue to listen beyond disk #4.

I used this book for a book-study in my church and everyone loved it! It generated some great discussion. We read it over four weeks, meeting once a week for discussion. It is accessible, yet profound.

I was amazed that the Reverend Tu Tu would get so upset with the young hotel worker who thought hew was a chauffeur. And then he writes a book about forgiveness. Doesn't sound like he is very forgiving.

A raw, highly personal and practical book on how to forgive. The Tutu's bring the practicalities of forgiving to life with the promise that forgiveness is good for you. This book will lead readers to healing of affronts, injuries and old hurts and open pathways to a fuller life. They know from deep personal experience that when you forgive you become an extraordinary person.

The Book of Forgiving by Desmond Tutu and his daughter Mpho is transforming my understanding of what forgiveness is and is not, and what's required for it to be possible -- and genuine -- rather than a facade, a sign of avoidance, or something that remains locked out of reach. Father and daughter both invite us to understand how much personal and collective work (and courage) is actually involved in activating cycles of healing and transformation, rather than staying locked in cycles of retaliation and transmission of wounds.

Their book is largely based on stories from post-Apartheid South Africa. Some of these stories involve people who were willing to talk about and work through the atrocities and injustices they suffered or perpetrated over decades. They are inspiring and made me wish we had Truth and Reconciliation Commissions everywhere. Not that this process has resolved everything in South Africa... but it has made a big difference, and it offers a different possibility and path to those who are willing to explore how to engage with our world's (and our own) dark side more productively. The book also draws on more personal stories from the authors' lives as well as acquaintances who suffered first- or second-hand physical or sexual violence, and learned how to forgive so they could free themselves from the grip of what they experienced.

One of the Tutus' recurring messages is that there can't be genuine or lasting social healing or forgiveness without first telling and hearing the truth about what happened (or continues to take place) and acknowledging what impact that has had or is having. This requires the willingness and courage to tell and hear heart-breaking stories, and allow the challenging feelings these trigger (anger, sorrow, shame etc) to come up and be witnessed. Making people's stories and experiences visible are the first two of four key steps the Tutus see as essential to building the way for forgiveness and a different kind of future. They are not offering simplistic cookie-cutter solutions, however, and they make a lot of space for the subtleties and complexities involved in the process of facing and healing the unimaginably diverse forms of suffering that are regularly inflicted or experienced in our world. They also take great pain to clarify that forgiving does not mean forgetting, nor does it mean bypassing justice, and absolving people from responsibility or accountability. And it's not a short or one-time-process either. For most people, it's a challenging iterative process that has its own needs and timing, which cannot be forced or fast-forwarded. I've been learning a huge lot from this book, and I highly recommend it.

This book has really great advice, and it was interesting. Desmond Tutu revealed some of his personal experiences. He gave some insight into the political turmoil and rebuilding of South Africa.

However, I admit some of the ideas were hard to accept. I understand that forgiveness is something you do for yourself.

What was harder to accept was the idea that nobody was irredeemable. I do believe that in the grand scheme of things that everyone will be redeemed in the end...but people may not be redeemable in THIS life. There was one horrifying story about a mob that beat and stabbed a girl to death, and one of the people involved in her death was fully pardoned and now works for the foundation that is named after the girl. Desmond Tutu argues that people suffer consequences of their action even if they aren't brought to justice, and I agree with that...but I also believe that some people are sociopaths, and they deserve to be locked up not to punish them but to keep society safe from them.

Other than that, I did enjoy this book and found it helpful.

I needed to read this now. Experiencing so many struggles at once, not by my own doing, and needed to find something that would provide me with the guidance, knowledge and insight on how to move through my story and my emotions to help me heal. It’s helping me find humanity again, one step at a time.

For anyone who needs the courage and strength to forgive themselves and/or others, The Book of Forgiving: The Fourfold Path for Healing Ourselves and Our World by Desmond Tutu and Mpho Tutu is like an honest but compassionate friend. Easy to read, with inspiring anecdotes and helpful exercises at the end of each chapter, this book gives you the tools to embark on your own Fourfold Path of forgiveness.

Recognizing that we are all human, and we all make mistakes, this book seeks to find the redeemable in everyone. It is written with a foundation that we are all going to need forgiveness in our lives at one time or another. And who among us can cast the first stone? There are even scientific investigations into forgiveness, and they are finding that forgiveness is good for your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being. Its opposite, resentment and a desire for retribution, will only lead to ill health and unhappiness.

The act of forgiveness is a balm that heals a person's broken life. By forgiving, a person goes from a victim to a hero in their lives. By seeking forgiveness, a person can regain their humanity, that part of themselves they lost when they committed the act that needed to be forgiven. The person who self-forgives gives themselves the gift of inner peace. We are all human, we will all make mistakes, and we all deserve to be forgiven. We are all interconnected, so what we do to others we do to ourselves.

Building a world of peace will rest on a firm foundation of forgiveness. This book lays out the map for anyone to embark on the Fourfold Path of forgiveness into the heart of who they really are. We are all born of pure spirit. It is only through suffering that people lash out and hurt others. By extending the hand of forgiveness, we are truly acknowledging another's humanity. It takes great strength and courage to forgive, maybe more to ask for forgiveness, and even more to forgive ourselves. With the tender guidance of this book, anyone can walk this path.

Find this review and more at New Consciousness Review, media for enlightened living.

"The Book of Forgiving" explores the value of forgiveness and how it pertains to our everyday lives. In order for us to regain emotional balance and continue living, we must learn to forgive those who have hurt us. Both authors include examples of different types of hurt and emphasize how we all have the power to forgive. "The Book of Forgiving" also has sections containing exercises to help each reader along on his or her journey of forgiveness!

Profound, a process of forgiveness, and practices to support moving along the path of forgiveness with examples and stories from violent encounters, tragedies, and everyday violations of trust. Excellent expressive narration (Audible version)

I am currently borrowing this from the library but I want my own copy, and I would like to buy a couple more to give as gifts. The examples of forgiveness are powerful, as are the humility and honesty of Desmond and Mpho Tutu. There hasn't been a time that I've read this book that I don't have tears streaming down my face. I highly recommend this book to anyone who needs to forgive.

A raw, highly personal and practical book on how to forgive. The Tutu's bring the practicalities of forgiving to life with the promise that forgiveness is good for you. This book will lead readers to healing of affronts, injuries and old hurts and open pathways to a fuller life. They know from deep personal experience that when you forgive you become an extraordinary person.

The Book of Forgiving by Desmond Tutu and his daughter Mpho is transforming my understanding of what forgiveness is and is not, and what's required for it to be possible -- and genuine -- rather than a facade, a sign of avoidance, or something that remains locked out of reach. Father and daughter both invite us to understand how much personal and collective work (and courage) is actually involved in activating cycles of healing and transformation, rather than staying locked in cycles of retaliation and transmission of wounds.

Their book is largely based on stories from post-Apartheid South Africa. Some of these stories involve people who were willing to talk about and work through the atrocities and injustices they suffered or perpetrated over decades. They are inspiring and made me wish we had Truth and Reconciliation Commissions everywhere. Not that this process has resolved everything in South Africa... but it has made a big difference, and it offers a different possibility and path to those who are willing to explore how to engage with our world's (and our own) dark side more productively. The book also draws on more personal stories from the authors' lives as well as acquaintances who suffered first- or second-hand physical or sexual violence, and learned how to forgive so they could free themselves from the grip of what they experienced.

One of the Tutus' recurring messages is that there can't be genuine or lasting social healing or forgiveness without first telling and hearing the truth about what happened (or continues to take place) and acknowledging what impact that has had or is having. This requires the willingness and courage to tell and hear heart-breaking stories, and allow the challenging feelings these trigger (anger, sorrow, shame etc) to come up and be witnessed. Making people's stories and experiences visible are the first two of four key steps the Tutus see as essential to building the way for forgiveness and a different kind of future. They are not offering simplistic cookie-cutter solutions, however, and they make a lot of space for the subtleties and complexities involved in the process of facing and healing the unimaginably diverse forms of suffering that are regularly inflicted or experienced in our world. They also take great pain to clarify that forgiving does not mean forgetting, nor does it mean bypassing justice, and absolving people from responsibility or accountability. And it's not a short or one-time-process either. For most people, it's a challenging iterative process that has its own needs and timing, which cannot be forced or fast-forwarded. I've been learning a huge lot from this book, and I highly recommend it.

This book has really great advice, and it was interesting. Desmond Tutu revealed some of his personal experiences. He gave some insight into the political turmoil and rebuilding of South Africa.

However, I admit some of the ideas were hard to accept. I understand that forgiveness is something you do for yourself.

What was harder to accept was the idea that nobody was irredeemable. I do believe that in the grand scheme of things that everyone will be redeemed in the end...but people may not be redeemable in THIS life. There was one horrifying story about a mob that beat and stabbed a girl to death, and one of the people involved in her death was fully pardoned and now works for the foundation that is named after the girl. Desmond Tutu argues that people suffer consequences of their action even if they aren't brought to justice, and I agree with that...but I also believe that some people are sociopaths, and they deserve to be locked up not to punish them but to keep society safe from them.

Other than that, I did enjoy this book and found it helpful.

VERITAS VOS LIBERABIT!
In the author's own words:
"The truth prevents us from pretending that the things that happened did not happen. How we begin is by first letting the truth be heard in all its rawness, in all its ugliness, and in all its messiness."

I needed to read this now. Experiencing so many struggles at once, not by my own doing, and needed to find something that would provide me with the guidance, knowledge and insight on how to move through my story and my emotions to help me heal. It’s helping me find humanity again, one step at a time.

For anyone who needs the courage and strength to forgive themselves and/or others, The Book of Forgiving: The Fourfold Path for Healing Ourselves and Our World by Desmond Tutu and Mpho Tutu is like an honest but compassionate friend. Easy to read, with inspiring anecdotes and helpful exercises at the end of each chapter, this book gives you the tools to embark on your own Fourfold Path of forgiveness.

Recognizing that we are all human, and we all make mistakes, this book seeks to find the redeemable in everyone. It is written with a foundation that we are all going to need forgiveness in our lives at one time or another. And who among us can cast the first stone? There are even scientific investigations into forgiveness, and they are finding that forgiveness is good for your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being. Its opposite, resentment and a desire for retribution, will only lead to ill health and unhappiness.

The act of forgiveness is a balm that heals a person's broken life. By forgiving, a person goes from a victim to a hero in their lives. By seeking forgiveness, a person can regain their humanity, that part of themselves they lost when they committed the act that needed to be forgiven. The person who self-forgives gives themselves the gift of inner peace. We are all human, we will all make mistakes, and we all deserve to be forgiven. We are all interconnected, so what we do to others we do to ourselves.

Building a world of peace will rest on a firm foundation of forgiveness. This book lays out the map for anyone to embark on the Fourfold Path of forgiveness into the heart of who they really are. We are all born of pure spirit. It is only through suffering that people lash out and hurt others. By extending the hand of forgiveness, we are truly acknowledging another's humanity. It takes great strength and courage to forgive, maybe more to ask for forgiveness, and even more to forgive ourselves. With the tender guidance of this book, anyone can walk this path.

Find this review and more at New Consciousness Review, media for enlightened living.

"The Book of Forgiving" explores the value of forgiveness and how it pertains to our everyday lives. In order for us to regain emotional balance and continue living, we must learn to forgive those who have hurt us. Both authors include examples of different types of hurt and emphasize how we all have the power to forgive. "The Book of Forgiving" also has sections containing exercises to help each reader along on his or her journey of forgiveness!

Profound, a process of forgiveness, and practices to support moving along the path of forgiveness with examples and stories from violent encounters, tragedies, and everyday violations of trust. Excellent expressive narration (Audible version)

I am currently borrowing this from the library but I want my own copy, and I would like to buy a couple more to give as gifts. The examples of forgiveness are powerful, as are the humility and honesty of Desmond and Mpho Tutu. There hasn't been a time that I've read this book that I don't have tears streaming down my face. I highly recommend this book to anyone who needs to forgive.

One of the best books I have ever read. Desmond Tutu and his daughter so succinctly describe forgiveness from the standpoint of one who needs to forgive another and one who needs to be forgiven by another. Very thoughtful book, will read again.

A book that helped my wife and I read to look at process of forgiving THE SCREW UP'S that we made too each other and found out we did not understand each other's REAL WORDS. A real PHENOMENAL book that should be shared and discuss by your love one.

I am glad I bought this audible book, but I have to tell you that I wish the Chapter titles were included. My downloaded copy just says Chapter 1, Chapter 2, etc., when I show the chapters. This is unfortunate, and I think it would be easy for you to fix this.

This was definitely a lesson about humanity's capacity, both good and bad, and the far-reaching consequences of our decisions large and small. Intellectually, it is an interesting an enlightening read but emotionally it is difficult and devastatingly beautiful.