Truth & Beauty: A Friendship

I read Lucy Grealy's "Autobiography of a Face" and liked it; I was moved by her suffering, as I had endured taunts by my schoolmates about my appearance all throughout my childhood, too. I read Ann Patchett's article about Grealy in New York magazine, and was shocked at how unstable Grealy really was. This book is a longer version of the article, and it is even more shocking in its details of how truly mentally ill Grealy was. But what is really appalling to me is the promoting of this book as a marvelous account of an enduring, loving "friendship". Although nicely written, this is the story of one of the sickest, most co-dependent relationships I have ever heard of. What was it about Grealy that Patchett found so enthralling? By her own account, Grealy was the roommate from hell; leaving bowls of Cream of Wheat on the floor, wet towels under pillows, running up huge phone bills. Her wonderful friend is also reckless, irresponsible, self-absorbed, and almost psychotically needy. Grealy is obsessively jealous of Patchett's other friendships, be they male or female. Throughout the book the two women are all over each other, or rather, Grealy is all over Patchett, who doesn't mind at all. Grealy is constantly in Patchett's lap, her arms around her neck, jumping into her arms, wrapping her legs around her waist, crawling into bed with her. While in Patchett's lap, Grealy turns her eyes up to her, and asks over and over ad nauseum "Do you love me? Best? Never stop loving me". To which Patchett invariably replies "I do love you. I'll never stop loving you. Darling.". Am I the only one who is creeped out by this? This "friendship" sure has a lot of physical aspects to it. I don't think Patchett is telling the whole story about the physical part of this unusually "close" relationship. Either that, or Grealy had all the maturity of particularly clingy four year old who is indulged literally all the time. After a while reading about these two gets downright sickening. Grealy takes, takes, takes and Patchett gives, gives, gives. Grealy's mere presence seems to be enough reward for Patchett; she does EVERYTHING for Grealy, and forgives her again and again for her consistently abominable behavior. Patchett claims Grealy had a "genius" for friendship, which is what drew so many people to her. "So many people in love with her", she says. Actually Grealy comes across as being very much alone, except for Patchett, who is always there to pick up the pieces and pay the bills. Towards the end, Patchett threatens to "leave" Lucy if she doesn't stop using heroin. But in the end, she realizes that she could never have given up Lucy, no matter what. I came to the conclusion that Patchett is one of those unfortunate people who have a need to be used by someone else; since Grealy was a master at doing this, no wonder she was hooked on their "friendship". If you want to read a story of two women, who may or may not have been lovers, who were entangled in an unhealthy dependence on one another, this book is for you. I came away from it feeling damned lucky I never had to endure the "friendship" of someone like Lucy Grealy.

This book hooked me from the first chapter, and I didn't want to put it down. It's about the sacrifices people make and the things they put up with for those that they love. But even with all the love and support in the world, ultimately how someone chooses to live their life is up to them. Ann Patchett portrays a friendship full of fun, creativity, and love. Lucy's neediness was bigger than anything that Ann could ever fill, as hard as she might try. I am so grateful to Ann for writing this book; it must have been so hard. Not only was it an absorbing, beautifully-written portrait of a friendship, but it also gives one a great view of the writer's life - the frustrations and the triumphs.

The thread in this book about the hard job of becoming and being a writer was interesting to me. The endless demands of Lucy were not. I have enjoyed Ann Patchett's novels, but this book just made me irritated at how invasive she let the relationship with Lucy become. I admired the circle of people who tried to support Lucy and stood by her, I just didn't understand how they could keep doing it. I don't mean to criticize, it's just that I had trouble seeing Lucy as a sympathetic character. I realize she suffered terribly due to her medical conditions but there has to be a limit to anyone's behavior. Lucy was actually only hurting herself but so many other people were constantly drawn into propping her up. I just didn't find it uplifting or inspiring or all that interesting to read about their struggle.

Clearly the author loved Grealy...what is unclear is whether Grealy returned that love or was a manipulative user. I found few redeeming qualities in the person described by Patchett and found myself a bit disgusted with Grealy's cavalier treatment of all and sundry, including her refusal to pay off any debts she incurred in the course of her life. The final straw came when I read her reaction to 9-11. I wanted to send her drug-abusing self back to Ireland and let its citizens support her.

In doing more research, I see that her twin sister is angry with Patchett for hijacking the Grealy family's grief. I find that equally offensive. It seems the entire family shares an *all about me* gene.

Nevertheless, I recommend this book. It is a tale of a narcissist enabled by friends and family who led a chaotic and not particularly productive life (at least by professional writer's standards) who finally found a lover in heroin that wasnt as forgiving as the people in her life.

Ann Patchett is a real gift of a writer, with a special talent for writing grounded, breathing characters. "Truth and Beauty" is nonfiction, but it reads like a fine novel. The character of Lucy Grealy, a writer herself, leaps from the page demanding to be loved and admired.

It's easy to see why so many people loved Lucy. She is madcap, exciting, and a wonderful writer (when she actually takes the time to write). Ann Patchett, by contrast, comes across as reserved, a little dowdy, and constantly in the shadow of Lucy's luminescence. But she also understands Lucy's insecurities and weaknesses, and it is the saintlike way she tries to help Lucy overcome these that make up the heart of the book (though she by no means depicts herself as a perfect, flawless friend).

There is a "there but for the grace of God go I" tone to the book, suggesting Grealy may have been what Patchett was afraid to see in the mirror. Does she owe her success as a writer to her friendship with Lucy? That's probably impossible to say for sure, but it's doubtful. At the very least, for her to write an entire book about her, it's clear Lucy Grealy comprises a major regret (or several) in Ann Patchett's life.

But I think we'd all be lucky to have such a friend.

Why is Ann Patchett being criticized for wanting to make money out of her friendship with the late Lucy Grealy? It isn't hard to believe that Lucy had a lot of secrets, she hinted as much in her own autobiography, and if after her death Ann Patchett chooses to spill all of them, Lucy can no longer be hurt. It isn't as if Ann had published this book while Lucy was still alive. As for her decision to keep all the money herself, well, most writers get to keep whatever money they make. They are not guilt tripped into having to donate large sums to cancer organizations. Ann should not have to forfeit all respect or credibility just because she is keeping the money she earned with her book. And who knows, maybe she is making a private donation, the way Frank Sinatra is said to have kept all his charitable donations a secret. Let us assume that Ann's own conscience is clear about her moral position in writing and publishing (and profiting from) this memoir, and then we can start at ground zero to begin assessing if "Truth & Beauty: A Friednship" is or is not a good book.

This is a story about a symbiotic friendship. It's fascinating because it leaves the reader to question the meaning of friendship itself. It seems as if Ann gives everything and gets nothing in return. But I don't believe that. Lucy accuses Ann of wanting to be a saint. But I don't believe that either. Lucy breathed excitement and, to some extent, fame into Ann's life. Ann, who otherwise tended to "blend in" stood out when she was with Lucy - that was true throughout their friendship. Regardless of whether "standing out" was a positive or a negative experience, it was something Ann just couldn't/wouldn't do on her own. But the deeper connection Ann had with Lucy could be likened to a parent/child relationship. What do parents "get" out of their relationships with their children? It's certainly one-sided. Lucy clearly suffered from stunted emotional growth because of the cancer she battled as a child. In some ways she remained 10 years old forever. Ann felt responsible for her. And, she loved her. Who can figure out love?

I found this book incredibly gripping and truthful to the bone. Friendship between many women is often more complex -- and more like a "romantic" relationship -- than many of us like to admit. Ann describes the true essence of her friendship with Lucy in all its dimensions -- leaving no bad or good thought unexpressed. I have a feeling that the unflattering aspects of Lucy's personality are revealed not just to be truthful, but to express the anger that Ann felt at Lucy's self-destructive tendencies. How angry I would have been at Lucy's selfishness -- suicide being the ultimate selfish act. Angry and wishing, like Ann, for a different ending.

Lucy Grealy bounded into Ann Patchett's life in 1985 and never really left until Lucy's death in 2002. The years inbetween are recounted here by Patchett in her first nonfiction offering. Ann Patchett is a successful author, having written one of my favorite books, Bel Canto. Her writing here is signature Patchett; beautiful, liquid prose, effortless like a virtuoso pianist is effortless. What I admired most about the book is Patchett's restraint. It would have been easy to simply explain her side of the story and be an apologist for Lucy's behavior. But she delves deeper than that by, in a way, not trying so hard to. She does not explain that elusive thing we call friendship; she paints a picture of it. Using the apt metaphor of the ant and the grasshopper, Patchett shows us the important thing: not why they were friends, but how. Lucy was needy and clinging to the point of annoyance, but she was also more troubled than most of her readers will ever understand, and therefore I reserve my own judgment. The last 70 pages of Truth and Beauty, in which Lucy breaks down completely, were at once riveting and painful, a downward spiral that no one, not Patchett, least of all Lucy, could stop. For all of us who have hoped to save someone with friendship, it is a sobering and even hopeless message, but at the same time refreshingly genuine. Patchett unflinchingly describes her own devotion and repulsion. Like the best fiction, this piece does not just tell what happened, but captures a feeling.

My only real beef is with the thinning out of details of Patchett's life later in the book. Since I have read each of her novels except for Taft, I had hoped for some tidbits as to inspiration and so on for her own work. As interesting as the ant was to me, however, the grasshopper of course dominated.

i have read some of previous reviews and i have to say i couldn't disagree more with some of the comments. i thought i would offer another perspective and explain why truth & beauty is well worth reading.

first, the writing is beautiful - spare and profound at the same time. patchett's insights and analogies are subtly woven through the text in such a way that they seem effortless.

second, the memoir chronicles the lives and work of two talented writers from the beginning of their careers, first at the iowa writers workshop to attending various prestigious fellowships and finally enjoying the success of becoming published, well respected writers. it is especially interesting to see that journey against the backdrop of the near universal terror that we experience in our twenties and mid thirties trying to figure out what we want to be, who we want to be with and what's truly important to us.

lastly, the friendship between ann patchett and lucy grealy is one of the most loving and complex relationships that i have ever read about. the biggest success of the book is patchetts ability to chronicle their friendship without romanticizing grealy's very serious problems and at the same time not making her self out to be a martyr. although many of us might not "get" the dynamics of their relationship it is clear to me that these women had an amazing friendship that supported and sustained them both through their coming of age.

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I loved Ann Patchett's first two novels, couldn't get into her last two (Magician's Assistant and the much-praised Bel Canto). However, this true story of a profound friendship and also on becoming a novelist, features some of Patchett's finest insights to date. Unfortunatley Grealy's self-obsessed brooding letters, while they mimic her tirelessly brooding personality (recounted with little held back), do nothing to endear her to the reader. I'm sure that had I known her in person, there would have been much to like and much to admire.

The book was in terrible condition. I volunteer in a library's used book store and we would not have put the book on the free shelf, but would have discarded it. It was barely readable and I was very disappointed.

I think Ann Patchett is a fine writer, and at first blush this seems to be a well-written book. But I wonder how such a fine writer could go on and on about her love and friendship for this Lucy person without letting me the reader know what on earth she - or anyone else - sees in her! Lucy comes across in this portrait as selfish, manipulative, undisciplined, and annoying - yet Ann claims to love her and certainly invests time, money and emotion into the relationship. Lucy, on the other hand, invests nothing. Oh, she keeps telling Ann she loves her, but she does nothing to hold up her end of the friendship. Allusions are made to Lucy's "words." Maybe that would appeal to another writer, but the reader of this book isn't shown any conversation that isn't about Lucy.

Had Patchett included some hints as to how she got drawn into this relationship and why she stayed, I think it would have been a better book.

I'm not Mike, I'm his wife, Barbara. He would never read this book. But, we share this account. I loved the book. I had stumbled into Bel Canto when drying nails post mani-pedi and a lady suggested I read it several years ago (her reading group was reading it). It was great. Then I "stumbled" into "Run" at a second hand bookstore in Wayne PA. Loved it. Then, again, to Truth & Beauty. I don't normally gravitate to nonfiction, but Ann Patchett is now a favorite, or should I just say, "I'm a big fan." Regardless, Truth & Beauty (I knew nothing of Lucy G. prior to this) was so lovely to me. I was so taken in by the simple joys they experienced, the excitement of "getting famous" which of course happens to very few. The unwavering support Ann gave Lucy, but also the charm of Lucy. I did not tear up until the very end. And, I cry at the beginning of Hallmark ads. I think Lucy was amazing but flawed to an obvious degree that made living in this world ultimately impossible. I think what Ann P. does is give us hope. We are co-dependent - and that is not always all bad. I think I read somewhere that she always looks at "love" as the unifying thing. (May be totally off point.) I think it is. Simple love. I get mad, but still love you. You screwup, but I still love you. I screwup, but you still love me. Simple but complicated. We need great story tellers like Ann Patchett. I hope she is very happy and writes lots more books. (I will read them all.)

After reading Ann Patchett's tale of her friendship with Lucy Grealy, I kept thinking that if an alien, unfamiliar with the concept or practice of love, landed on earth and asked me for a book to learn about love, in all its intricate resiliency, this is the book I'd lend. We are none of us perfect, but we all can love and be loved and be better for it. What Ms. Patchett details with such unflinching honesty is that sometimes people come into our lives, complicated individuals who both entrance and antagonize us. Yet we love them, we can't help but nurture them. We recognize the fierceness and frailty of their spark and we do all that we can to keep it bright as long as possible. We know they love us too, even if only as they are able. When they are gone, we suffer the loss of their bright, flawed humanity. I imagine it took her memoir to make Ann realize how vital she was to Lucy as well. This is a painful, beautiful elegy. I recommend reading this first, then reading Lucy Grealy's "Autobiography of a Face". Kathleen Hamilton Allen, Author of "Change of Address" - a tale of Family and Friends, Faith, Fame and FortuneChange of Address

I think discussion of this book deserves two additonal and very worthy points from the bulk of the reviews already presented. Primarily, that the writing is simply suburb, and I believe Ann Patchett could write 30 pages of incredible prose about a cardboard box, with equal captivation. Secondly, that the key to understanding the dynamics of this friendship is Unconditional Love and Committment. Its shocking to see how many readers considered Ann a doormat, and Lucy a spoiled and ungrateful friend. It seemed clear to me, that they shared a true love for each other, and that they were both devoted. I know if my best friend was hospitalized and suffering, I'd go to the ends of the earth to fulfill her request, and that she would do probably more for me. What I found notable, was that Lucy's flamboyant and frustrating behavior toward the end of her life (while under the clasp of addiction) was not formed on recreational use, but rather, desperation to end pain. Ann proved herself to be a true friend and not a friend of convienence. Lucy's brilliance, for me, shone through Ann's prose, and I never considered Ann to be used in any way. On the contrary, it seemed obvious to me, that Lucy was very worthy of being loved, intellegent, interesting, and someone worthy to know. The point of the book, I thought, was to show the underbelly of Lucy's self esteem, and to show how much Lucy overcame in light of her disfigurement and ridicule. It would be my guess, that other people with facial disfigurements, spend most of their life in hiding. I thought it was a beautiful memoir by a loving woman who also is a talented writer, who understands that love between two friends does not require scorekeeping.

This memoir is about the friendship between two woman writers, the novelist Ann Patchett and the poet/memoirist Lucy Grealy. I randomly picked this up from my neighborhood cafe book exchange and loved it. I immediately vowed to find Patchett's novels, which is not always a response I have when I read a memoir I like, as I have not bothered to pick up novels by, say, Anthony Bourdain or Augusten Burroughs. Perhaps the difference is that in the latter two cases, the personality of the author and the milieu is half the charm, whereas the virtues of Patchett's book, which lie not just in the prose (which is excellent) but in the depiction of relationships and a character portrait of someone other than the author, would seem to translate more easily to a novel. So I was pleased to discover that I already had Patchett's The Magician's Apprentice, which I have no recollection of buying.

I had earlier read Grealy's memoir, Autobiography of a Face, which is about her diagnosis of jaw cancer at the age of nine, her horrifying and lengthy treatment with chemotherapy, radiation, and surgery that removed much of her jaw, and of her experience growing up with a disfigured face. Though it was quite poetically written and the chemotherapy descriptions in particular were almost unreadably vivid, I had hoped for more of a sense of the author as a person, or more discussion of her experiences as an adult, or something-- it read to me as if large sections were missing or opaque.

When Patchett and Grealy meet in college, Grealy is famous on campus, for her talent, her charisma, and her tragic and dramatic life story-- much of her jaw is missing, she has undergone repeated unsuccessful surgeries to repair her face, and she suffers numerous health and living problems because she can't chew or swallow properly. Patchett is a bit of a nobody. But they end up becoming roommates, and bond instantly in the way that people do when they suddenly meet someone they can talk to about everything they always thought no one else could understand, and with whom the conversation flows. Besides that, they have chemistry. Though there are erotic elements in their relationship, at least in my view, what they mainly have is a friendship that's as lasting and passionate as a lifelong love-affair. In a sense, it is a lifelong love affair.

Oddly, reading the book convinced me of three things: that Patchett really did love Lucy and wrote the book out of love and grief after Lucy's death, that the book is honest to the best of Patchett's ability, and that though I have a lot of sympathy for Lucy Grealy, I don't actually find her likable. She comes across as needy, self-centered, a drama queen, and a bit of spoiled brat who never grows up. Granted, she had a lot to bear and reasons she was the way she was, but still. Patchett does her best to get across Lucy's personal charisma, but it's tough to fully portray a quality that's often solely in a person's aura and not in their words or deeds. Patchett herself is more in the background, but sees herself as the plodding ant to Lucy's charmingly feckless grasshopper.

But the relationship between the two of them comes across beautifully. Lucy loves to be taken care of, and Ann Patchett loves taking care; it's co-dependent, but it's also real love. This is a great character portrait, and a brilliant portrayal of a relationship that on one level makes no sense and on other levels seems inevitable and natural.

I was so curious about the background of the book that I looked it up, and found the swirl of intense and mixed feelings that so frequently surround memoirs: Lucy Grealy's sister is furious with Ann Patchett for writing a book that tells all about Lucy's less-than-stellar qualities, for priveleging her own grief above the family's, and for exposing the family to unwanted fame; readers here on the store note that Lucy was a bitch who brought everything on herself, or else accuse Patchett of not coming clean about the clearly lesbian nature of the relationship, of cashing in on a dead friend's memory for money, of being a doormat, of allowing Lucy to die (of a drug overdose) through her failure to apply tough love, of making Lucy look bad, of deliberately making Lucy look bad out of spite or jealousy, and of failing to give the proceeds to cancer research; and other readers defend the book at some length.

I wondered, when I read all that, if Ann Patchett hoped that readers would see Lucy as she saw Lucy-- infuriating, irresponsible, but impossibly charming-- and would love her too, and if she was saddened that a lot of them didn't. I wonder if she wishes she'd exposed more of her own flaws for balance, or softened Lucy's. Or if, when she was writing, she left nothing out because it never occurred to her any number of flaws could prevent anyone from loving Lucy.

I have yet to read a book or article she has written and not bee drawn in by her prose as well as her ability to tell a compelling story. This is no exception. She is able to tell difficult truths in a way that doesn't cause the reader to want to turn away. I simply want more.

I really enjoyed this read... Great for anyone caring for someone, anyone with a best friend relationship that's close to sisterhood, anyone dealing with sickness... just anyone. Very well written...

By the end of this book, I felt as though Patchett had written it half as a tribute to a fellow artist she admired, and half as a way of getting even with a "friend" who had treated her like dirt most of the time.

Patchett gushes in this memoir about how much she, and apparently everyone else they knew, "loved" Lucy outrageously, yet there is hardly one story about Lucy that presents her as a likeable (let alone lovable) person. Hmmmm.... Patchett The Doormat does whatever Lucy wants, never talks back, never says no... then goes on to tell the world about all of Lucy's appalling behavior. Hmmm. Most of the positive things she says about Lucy are about her writing, and by the end, even that starts to seem like "yeah, but she was an amazing writer."

It seems to me that Patchett never got beyond her awe of Lucy that started in college, continuing through adulthood to be "flattered" that Lucy gave her the time of day. Lucy the Grasshopper seems to mirror everything Ann the Ant wanted to be, and like a good neurotic, Ann needed to know (ironically, in Lucy's words), that Lucy "loved her best." Why else would someone put up with 20-odd years of abuse? But I sense that somewhere in her heart of hearts, Ann always knew she was getting the short end of the stick, and perhaps by writing this (admittedly enthralliing and well-written) book, she got hers.

What merit I found in this book was due almost entirely to Patchett's narrative style. The author of two of the books I recommend most often to my friends and even to random strangers (Bel Canto and The Magician's Assistant) doesn't disappoint on that score in this -- what does one call it, a memoir?

But therein lies the main problem -- it's not a memoir, but it's told with too much almost-voyeuristic detail to be a respectable biography. I suppose that what it's supposed to be is a memoir of a friendship, as well as a memorial tribute of sorts, but it would have been better, in my opinion, as an essay, without spending what amounts to a large part of a book going into all the sordid personal details of Lucy's life and struggles. If someone writes about her own (appalling, really, in this case) promiscuity and drug use, you feel that she has the right to do so and that she's given you the right to read it -- whether one is interested in that sort of thing or not, she's putting the choice in the reader's hands. But no matter how close Patchett was to Lucy Grealy, the other half of the titular friendship, I felt like she was overstepping her rights, like she gave us Lucy's diary to read, without her consent. I enjoyed reading about the more innocent aspects of their shared life -- their inside jokes, for example, and their trials and successes as writers -- but it seemed like a page couldn't go by without a shot of the kind of details that I personally think would have been better kept between Ann and Lucy, especially since Lucy wasn't the one telling the story.

Chances are Lucy wouldn't have minded; obviously Patchett cared deeply about her and had reasons for writing about her life the way she did. Not being on the inside, so to speak, I obviously don't have anything to say about whether this story should have been written or not. But as a reader, a looker-on, I can say that I do wish I had left Lucy some respectful privacy. Had I known how deeply private this story was, I'd not have chosen to read it.

This book utlimately disappointed me. I was unacquainted with Lucy Grealy and, at the conclusion of the book, I thought the claims for her immense attractiveness and charisma were not borne out.I felt that it should more appropriately have been written as a personal memoir and circulatad to those who did know her.I was puzzled by the pull she clearly had on all who knew her. They would understand. I didn't. Perhaps Patchett was too close to her or mesmerised by her to distance herself sufficiently to communicate to all of us who didn't know her just why this woman held people in such thrall. I felt sympathy for her suffering and medical problems and made allowances therefor, particularly for her self-absorption, but there was clearly more to her than that if one looks at the objective evidence of what people were prepared to do for her and the allowances they made. But it didnt come across to me. Her letters gave some clues (I haven't read her book) but the narrative was not persuasive in this respect. It seemed a fairly unilateral love match as friendships go. Was Lucy ever genuinely interested in Ann in her relationships or her success? It was unsatisfactory as biography (although I know it was not meant to be a biography). Lucy seemed to have been born into an isolated world. Where was her family? What was her relationship with them?

I will always read anything by Ann Patchett. Bel Canto is up there amongst my favourite books. As a fiction writer she is a master. I look forward to the next one, fiction or otherwise.

Following Lucy and Ann through the course of their lengthy friendship is a true journey, through book deals, surgeries, and addiction. Overall, Patchett offers a first hand view of an intense friendship with a woman who is constantly struggling with her self-worth, whether it be physical appearance or sexual attractiveness. Lucy's endless questioning of herself left me tired and I commend Ann for sticking through it, and being a best friend through the thick and thin.

If you have ever thought you had a friendship worth writing about, take a look at this memoir and be dazzled by the love.

Some of the other reviews have questioned why the author was in a life long relationship with Lucy Grealy as if it were a big mystery. Well, I believe I understand why Ann allowed herself to be treated that way by Lucy, she was co-dependent, as were most of the people Lucy surrounded herself with. There are certain people who will surround an addict like a moth to a flame, and Lucy found many of them. And this happens even before the addict picks up drugs... they are just exciting to certain people. It sounds like Lucy was a ball of attractive energy, and Ann certainly writes beautifully about their relationship. And just because the book describes a dysfunctional relationship does not mean we do not read the book or enjoy it... after all, we still go see King Kong don't we? It is clear though, even Ann writes she could not "quit" Lucy the way Lucy could not quit drugs...

Few of us experience relationships as deep, compelling and infinite as Patchett's 20 year friendship with Lucy Grealy. This book is both heart-warming and heart-wrenching. Even knowing it in advance, the end is unbearable. Truth & Beauty speaks from the heart and Patchett proves that, in the end, love is all that remains. A rich read, this is an ode to unconditional love.

I love this author's previous works so it is disappointing to write this review. The author presents her friend in the most disloyal of lights, provides no insight into her own behaviors, and the book often reads like a tabloid- only a tabloid doesn't betray its readers with a false sense of loyalty and friendship. At the end I was better able to understand why Patchett might be so passively aggressively angry, but that would have been a far more interesting book to read then just salacious details of her friends sad suffering.

I don't like memoirs, but I read this one in one day. The two writers Anne Patchett and Lucy Grealy meet at Sarah Lawrence and later are roommates while pursuing Master's Degrees at the Iowa Writer's Workshop. Fate deals them both great success as writers, yet their personal paths take completely divergent courses. The bond of friendship spans two decades and countless heartbreaks. Anne Patchett does portray herself to be the 'saint' in this friendship but you would almost have to be to endure the suffering that being friend to Lucy Grealy demanded. The themes of friendship, art, loneliness and love are rendered with realism and depth. Patchett's obvious love for writing and her poet friend is shared in this gift of a book.

I pored through this novel in record speed. This was such an articulate, delicate, detailed recollection of a friendship. I had read Autobiography of a Face a few months before reading T&B and found that T&B really enhanced the experience of reading Grealy's book. I loved everything about this book and highly recommend it.

I'm glad I read this book because it has served as a healthy reminder of just what I am missing in my departure from the world of hipster artists. I believe that the reason Ann and Lucy and the rest of their group all love each other to death is because they share a sense of breathing rarified air, and most of all...they mirror each other's "magnificence." The sitting on laps, breathy appeals of "Do you love me" middle of the night phone calls with eccentric demands, everyone forgiving each other for the most neurotic behaviors because they know they must -- they are each members of the elite, darlings of the world, and life is just different for them. They play by other, higher rules, their chosen role in life is to be the best and the brightest. One cannot really expect hoi polloi to understand the kind of love shared by brilliant artists. They are of a kind, and they must nurture the sheer genius found in the mirror, even if it means jumping into a taxi at 5 in the morning to help a friend vomit apricot nectar. Lucy didn't have to be a genuinely wonderful human being. She was talented enough and arrogant enough to win adoration from those like her. It's innocent, this unique world of "the serious artist," and thrilling for a time, to be part of. It is also something to grow out of, to move on from, once one realizes that the gestures, words spoken, actions taken, no matter how compelling, come from a very shallow place within and, in fact, could not be more insincere.

What is a friend, and how much can one give to another? Can a friendship be sustained when one demands so much of the other? The answer given in this memoir is "yes".

This is a beautifully written piece that explores the remarkable friendship of two talented women authors.

An emotional story of unconditional love. For any person who has interest in writing, with many references to the two artists careers. The narration was so genuine and made the reader feel the the sacrifices, hope, and heartbreak page after page.

I do not understand this book. And no I do not mean that the writing style is complicated or that I cannot comprehend the words. I simply mean why did Ann Patchett fall so hopelessly for Lucy Grealy! I read Autobigraphy of a Face, it was one of the reasons I wanted to read Truth and beauty but now I wish I had left it at Autobiography of a Face because this book irritated me! Grealy comes off as a needy, obnoxious, egomaniacal in her own way, self-absorbed dramaqueen. I mean yes I do realize that Lucy had it hard but that does not account for her addiction to surgury and turmoil. An utter refusal to accept her life or at the very least attempt to adjust to it. I am really at a loss as to why she was so endearing to Patchett from the begining. Does she just have a savior complex? I am sure there were things about Lucy that drew people to her but I missed that element in the book.

Patchett is a beautiful writer and I hope that her future works have better subjects. This book was not only sad it was completely puzzling. I cannot figure out if this was a love letter or a hate letter because surely Greary was not intended to endear...

This is Ann Patchett's first biography.It concerns the time

when she and Poet Lucy Grealy shared a room at the Iowa

Writer's Workshop and became best friends.

Although beautifully constucted and told,I found it to be more of an autobiography of Ann.

In the beginning,Ann,was a great support to Lucy(whose

entire lower jaw)Had been destroyed by Cancer at the tender

age of eleven years.Lucy originated from Ireland,where her early

years took place.

Unsatisfied,with her looks,Lucy continuued having surgery

in her Adult life.She playfully adopted Ann's family,and

went there for Thanksgiving and Christmas.It did not mention

where her parents were staying.

Oftentimes,the surgery made Lucy look worse.We can only

guess at the emotional damage she suffered waiting to see

what she would look like.A women's greatest physical vanity

is tied into her facial presentation.

Ann's published books came out before Lucy's,causing some

jealousy,on Lucy's part,but Lucy would always return to Ann

for comfort.Lucy had found more friends as she published her

memoirs and poetry.Lucy was a high maintenance woman,expecting

much from her friends.My personal opinion was Lucy stayed

at the eleven year old stage,when all the horrible damage

was done to a child.

Toward the end,Ann presents herself as Lucy's sole survivor

and caretaker.Telling the whole world of Lucy's abortion.

Her dabbling in cocaine,and other sef destuctive behavior.

Would a friend,a close friend,tell this to the World.

Ann talks lovingly of her own family,but what of Lucy's ?

Now they have all this information,Lucy would probably prefer

they never heard.

I cannot conceive of a friend who tells all her friends faults in a book,after she is dead.

I can only think Ann became too burdened,and took on too

much,and felt no gratitude.

What was sweet in the beginning changed over the years,

for both young women.

The writer Anne Patchett was the poet Lucy Grealy's best friend. After Grealy died, Patchet wrote "Truth and Beauty" as a testiment to their friendship and to Grealy's life-long struggle with her deformity from facial cancer. "Truth and Beauty" is a fascinating glimpse into the lives of two amazing writers, and an expose of the meaning of true friendship. It is especially interesting to read together with Lucy Grealy's book "The Autobiography of a Face." Everyone that I have lent my copies of the book to has agreed that they are the read of a lifetime.

I don't like memoirs, but I read this one in one day. The two writers Anne Patchett and Lucy Grealy meet at Sarah Lawrence and later are roommates while pursuing Master's Degrees at the Iowa Writer's Workshop. Fate deals them both great success as writers, yet their personal paths take completely divergent courses. The bond of friendship spans two decades and countless heartbreaks. Anne Patchett does portray herself to be the 'saint' in this friendship but you would almost have to be to endure the suffering that being friend to Lucy Grealy demanded. The themes of friendship, art, loneliness and love are rendered with realism and depth. Patchett's obvious love for writing and her poet friend is shared in this gift of a book.

I pored through this novel in record speed. This was such an articulate, delicate, detailed recollection of a friendship. I had read Autobiography of a Face a few months before reading T&B and found that T&B really enhanced the experience of reading Grealy's book. I loved everything about this book and highly recommend it.

I'm glad I read this book because it has served as a healthy reminder of just what I am missing in my departure from the world of hipster artists. I believe that the reason Ann and Lucy and the rest of their group all love each other to death is because they share a sense of breathing rarified air, and most of all...they mirror each other's "magnificence." The sitting on laps, breathy appeals of "Do you love me" middle of the night phone calls with eccentric demands, everyone forgiving each other for the most neurotic behaviors because they know they must -- they are each members of the elite, darlings of the world, and life is just different for them. They play by other, higher rules, their chosen role in life is to be the best and the brightest. One cannot really expect hoi polloi to understand the kind of love shared by brilliant artists. They are of a kind, and they must nurture the sheer genius found in the mirror, even if it means jumping into a taxi at 5 in the morning to help a friend vomit apricot nectar. Lucy didn't have to be a genuinely wonderful human being. She was talented enough and arrogant enough to win adoration from those like her. It's innocent, this unique world of "the serious artist," and thrilling for a time, to be part of. It is also something to grow out of, to move on from, once one realizes that the gestures, words spoken, actions taken, no matter how compelling, come from a very shallow place within and, in fact, could not be more insincere.

What is a friend, and how much can one give to another? Can a friendship be sustained when one demands so much of the other? The answer given in this memoir is "yes".

This is a beautifully written piece that explores the remarkable friendship of two talented women authors.

An emotional story of unconditional love. For any person who has interest in writing, with many references to the two artists careers. The narration was so genuine and made the reader feel the the sacrifices, hope, and heartbreak page after page.

I do not understand this book. And no I do not mean that the writing style is complicated or that I cannot comprehend the words. I simply mean why did Ann Patchett fall so hopelessly for Lucy Grealy! I read Autobigraphy of a Face, it was one of the reasons I wanted to read Truth and beauty but now I wish I had left it at Autobiography of a Face because this book irritated me! Grealy comes off as a needy, obnoxious, egomaniacal in her own way, self-absorbed dramaqueen. I mean yes I do realize that Lucy had it hard but that does not account for her addiction to surgury and turmoil. An utter refusal to accept her life or at the very least attempt to adjust to it. I am really at a loss as to why she was so endearing to Patchett from the begining. Does she just have a savior complex? I am sure there were things about Lucy that drew people to her but I missed that element in the book.

Patchett is a beautiful writer and I hope that her future works have better subjects. This book was not only sad it was completely puzzling. I cannot figure out if this was a love letter or a hate letter because surely Greary was not intended to endear...

This is Ann Patchett's first biography.It concerns the time

when she and Poet Lucy Grealy shared a room at the Iowa

Writer's Workshop and became best friends.

Although beautifully constucted and told,I found it to be more of an autobiography of Ann.

In the beginning,Ann,was a great support to Lucy(whose

entire lower jaw)Had been destroyed by Cancer at the tender

age of eleven years.Lucy originated from Ireland,where her early

years took place.

Unsatisfied,with her looks,Lucy continuued having surgery

in her Adult life.She playfully adopted Ann's family,and

went there for Thanksgiving and Christmas.It did not mention

where her parents were staying.

Oftentimes,the surgery made Lucy look worse.We can only

guess at the emotional damage she suffered waiting to see

what she would look like.A women's greatest physical vanity

is tied into her facial presentation.

Ann's published books came out before Lucy's,causing some

jealousy,on Lucy's part,but Lucy would always return to Ann

for comfort.Lucy had found more friends as she published her

memoirs and poetry.Lucy was a high maintenance woman,expecting

much from her friends.My personal opinion was Lucy stayed

at the eleven year old stage,when all the horrible damage

was done to a child.

Toward the end,Ann presents herself as Lucy's sole survivor

and caretaker.Telling the whole world of Lucy's abortion.

Her dabbling in cocaine,and other sef destuctive behavior.

Would a friend,a close friend,tell this to the World.

Ann talks lovingly of her own family,but what of Lucy's ?

Now they have all this information,Lucy would probably prefer

they never heard.

I cannot conceive of a friend who tells all her friends faults in a book,after she is dead.

I can only think Ann became too burdened,and took on too

much,and felt no gratitude.

What was sweet in the beginning changed over the years,

for both young women.

The writer Anne Patchett was the poet Lucy Grealy's best friend. After Grealy died, Patchet wrote "Truth and Beauty" as a testiment to their friendship and to Grealy's life-long struggle with her deformity from facial cancer. "Truth and Beauty" is a fascinating glimpse into the lives of two amazing writers, and an expose of the meaning of true friendship. It is especially interesting to read together with Lucy Grealy's book "The Autobiography of a Face." Everyone that I have lent my copies of the book to has agreed that they are the read of a lifetime.

wonderfully written. if you put a gun to my head and ask who was a better writer, patchett or her friend lucy grealy, the friend that makes completes this companionship, i'd say grealy. much more forceful, passionate and wild writer, hence grealy is not alive now, but patchett is. good book however. check out grealy's writings too.

I disagree with reviewers of this book who say it's not an account of a friendship, but of rather dependency or sickness. The book is beautiful written, and it does show an amazingly complex friendship -- Patchett doesn't idealize their relationship. She is a gifted writer, and writes a wonderful book. It's sad, yes, but also wonderfully funny and endearing. I recommend reading it.

Reading through previous reviews, many people have pointed out: (a) Lucy was a selfish person (b)Ann must have had some problems to put up with it. What these people are missing is that in a true friendship, you have to accept the totality of the other person's character because your love for them necessitates it. This is one of my favorite books because it reminds me of my relationship with my best friend. We both have Lucy and Ann characteristics, and we both lend each other the splendor of our lives when the other needs it. Don't read the book as a moral/ethical novel, but as a window into a beautiful and fruitful friendship. Lucy and Ann may have respectively had a few problems, but who doesn't? It is the way that they connect the moments of life together in their writing that is important here.

I read "Autobiography of a Face" many years ago and got this book from the library as well. It's easy to see why it made the NY Times best seller list; it's very well written but both women sound incredibly dysfunctional, to the point where you just can't make any of this stuff up. Lucy was the type who took, and took, and took - and poor Ms. Patchett kept giving to the point of PAYING HER DELINQUENT BILLS while AOAF was itself on the best-seller list. (Yes, I'm shouting!)

As for the title of my review, she sounds like the kind of woman any decent man would rather shove in front of a truck than have sex with - and this has NOTHING to do with her appearance. On the contrary, it sounds like the men stood in line and took numbers. When did she find the time to eat, sleep, go to the bathroom, shoot heroin, or throw up newly purchased apricot nectar?

How many of her numerous personality faults can be blamed on her cancer will never be known, but regardless, she did indeed die of Ewing's sarcoma......25 years after her treatments ended.

I deducted one star for the unlikability of each main character. Sorry, Ann.

What makes Ann Patchett's book so wonderful and moving (and it is those things and more), is the fact that she tells the story of her friendship with Lucy Grealy in a way that restores faith in what friendship is really about -- i.e., this is an unfliching gaze not only at love but in confusion and betrayal, as well. It is also a book that reminds us -- in a time when, as a country anyway, we may have forgotten -- how one's commitment to individuality and passion make the world a bearable place to live.

Sorry readers but slogging through this "tribute" to friendship was about as enjoyable as a root canal. Where to begin? The first thing that comes to mind was "what a sick mess of a relationship". You can sum it up in a nutshell something like this. Lucy to Ann .... "You will, pay my bills, clean my pigsty of a house, do all my bidding however outrageous, lavish me with attention, declare your love.., in turn I will, ignore you at will, rarely deliver anything as promised, drop you for a better gig at a moments notice, take no responsibility for anything and use you for everything you've got... Ann to Lucy "Yes pet!" Lucy comes off as petty, self-absorbed, spoiled and plain obnoxious minus half a face or not. Ann is a classic enabler, you can't help but pity her. Like other reviewers I took issue with the author revealing every sordid detail about her dead friend while telling us nothing of her own shortcomings. Although ultimately I suppose this novel itself speaks volumes about the author's many flaws.

This book was extremely interesting and well written. I would definitely suggest reading Autobiography of a Face in the same time frame. It is amazing to see the differing views of the same events as they unfold. Both books are well worth reading.

The first time I met Lucy Grealy was at a party where she didn't know anyone. My friend, a man who at the time was dying of AIDs and who had taken care to read her work beforehand, insisted we approach her to welcome her, as she stood quite alone, looking overwhelmed and not at all at ease. He smiled warmly and extended his hand, telling her how much he admired her writing. She appraised him sourly, made some reference of the "of course you admire my writing, I write well," variety, and turned sharply away.

The second time I met Lucy Grealy, I was strolling through a quaint town with another friend, with whom she had gone to grad school. Upon seeing Grealy, he called out to her and crossed the street to congratulate her on her book. Seeing him approach, Grealy crossed the street at an angle to avoid him, and when they later ended up at the same award gathering for writers, she turned to him and said, "YOU? They gave YOU the same award they gave ME?"

What I found amazing, then, as I read Ann Patchett's book, was that Patchett describes literally hundreds of incidents far more negative than the ones outlined above, faithfully revealing Grealy as the rude, weak, petulant, narcisstic, petty, disturbed, and yes, utterly ugly person that she was (although I would argue that her inner ugliness was far, far greater than her facial deformity) and yet, somehow makes Grealy if not sympathetic then certainly compelling. I have to re-read the book to see exactly how Patchett does it. I do know that she acknowledges the hard truths of Grealy's rather deficient character with wisdom and charity. Who among us could walk that tightrope of love and honesty? I couldn't, and I don't think many others could, either. In Patchett's sure hands, Grealey emerges as a character we actually care about. I cannot think of a better testament to Patchett's writing ability than that.

What I remember most when news of Grealy's death made the rounds of my acquaintances is that no one-not people who'd gone to the Writer's Workshop with her and Patchett in Iowa, not colleagues of hers at Sarah Lawrence, not the people I still kept in touch with who remembered Grealy at the party mentioned above or those who knew her through the award they shared with her-mourned her at all. If anything, people tried-not altogether successfully-to suppress tight little smiles. "Oh well," is what people said, not at all regretfully. It was a first for me, the first time I'd personally known someone to pass with such indifference or worse, and as much as I did not like Grealy myself, I was haunted by it. How sad, I thought, for one's death mean so little to so many. Patchett's book is a surprising vindication for Grealy. If someone so difficult can be so loved and so lovingly portrayed, it should give hope to us all.

The reason I even looked at reviews for this book is so that I could gage how trustworthy other book reviews on here are and how seriously I should take them. Now that I look at the negative, totally ridiculous critiques of Truth and Beauty, I'm never trusting another sour review on here again! When somebody asks me, "What's your favorite book?" I used to say something by T. Capote or M. Angelo, but now I reply, without hesitation, "TRUTH & BEAUTY by Ann Patchett!" Seriously. This book is awesome and I'm annoyed even reading other bad reviews on here about it. Patchett writes in a way that makes me stop, re-read the page, and then say to myself, "Damn, this is great stuff! Why didn't I think of something like that?" I think if you are an aspiring writer, or just somebody who appreciates intelligent, well-written prose, then you should read this one. Do not trust the other reviewers on this page - they're probably the kind of people who'd give a Harlequin novel 5 stars.

I agree entirely with Jonah. Other readers have missed the point, and are overanalyzing, in my opinion. Who can explain the mystery and connection of true friendship, or marriage? This book is about truth (and deception), beauty (and ugliness), and the richness and complexity of life.

This is a running diary of a strange life after graduation from Sarah Lawrence College when deciding to become a writer by enrolling in Iowa Writers' Workship in the mid '80s. She had a Catholic education (like my nephews) all twelve years before going off to school. A fellow classmate had made an impression on her, though was less than friendly, because of a facial deformity which had crippled her life.

Lucy was a year older than Ann, but she needed a place to belong, somewhere she could be expressive and not be looked on as an oddity. After they were settled as roommates in Iowa, they became best friends.

In Nashville, Ann met Dr. Karl V. and Lucy liked him as well. Lucy wasn't exactly normal, taking heroin which caused her death of an overdose a week before Christmas, 2002. The reason she continues to see Lucy's 'spirit' in odd places is the nonchalant way she treated her when she asked if she could spend Christmas with her -- Lucy felt rejected! And probably knew that Ann had turned her back on her friend to be in Atlanta with Karl. After so many years together, she should have been invited along, but that's 'hind-sight.'

She tells so much 'truth' in this book you wish sometimes she would be more discreet, for a Southern girl -- but the 'beauty' (if there is any) is on the inside, and not from a bar of soap at all. Smooth skin means nothing when your face is deformed. Having to face that truth turns one bitter with no hope for a happy future. The mirror does not lie, I've found to my despair. This is not a happy story, and some of the intimate details would have been better left unsaid.

Ann Patchett wrote THE MAGICIAN'S ASSISTANT and BEL CANTO previously.

Skip her novel, Bel Canto (I know. I know. It won prizes.) and go straight to 'Truth & Beauty', a memoir of her friendship with the poet Lucy Grealy. I wish i could say more but I don't want to take away a minute of your pleasure from reading this. You'll read it in two days or less, I guarantee you.

This book never really took off. I kept waiting for something to happen and for there to be a point I have loved other books by Ann Pachet but not this one. It goes nowhere and then abruptly ends. It's no State of Wonder! There are a lot of better reads out there.

This book is unexpectedly good, mainly because it recounts, in excrutiating detail, the strange and weird friendship between a celebrated author and a not-so-celebrated friend--Lucy. Lucy shoots heroin, trashes her friends, and has seemingly randon sexual encounters. According to the book, she is self-aborbed and hedonistic. She has a "sweet" boyfriend, but he is rejected--tossed aside like everyone else in Lucy's life, at least in this book. It's interesting to note that despite Ann's gushing appreciation for all things Lucy, she is not even mentioned IN PASSING in her famed book.

I would recommend this book to anyone interesting in socio-pathic relationships.

Lucy was so unlikeable, self-absorbed, infantile, and one-dimentional that I just didn't care what happened to her.

The only good thing about this story is that Patchett wrote it so well--hence the three stars.

This book reminds me of a 1950s lesbian pulp novel where the protaganists meet, fall in love, marry men, but remain lifelong intimate friends. This is a work of nonfiction, but I believe the analogy is still valid.

Ann writes at length about Lucy's serial relationships with men. But you have to wonder whether Lucy's love of Ann was more than just a platonic friendship. Why? Well, from Ann's own descriptions, Lucy loved her in the extreme. So much so that she jumped in her arms, sat on her lap, slept in her bed, kissed her (ON the lips).

All the while, I kept wondering: what does Ann get out of this relationship? She reminds me of an addict, constantly returning to the source of her love, her joy, her anguish, her pain, her compulsion.

Wow, this book is a real mess. So many fellowships, so many apartments, so much crying, so much "talking" about being "writers"...some men were mentioned, some friends. Absolutely no insight. Reminds me of little notes we sometimes jot in our diaries. "Looked for apartment today." Painful read. The best part of the book is the inside dust jacket, also know as the marketing tool used to make me chose the book in the first place. Don't know much about writing grants and fellowships but this book makes me think you get some sort of badge or patch to sew on your sash when you complete one. I chose the book because of my own best friend....my book would have been a lot more than noting each phone call or what city everyone was living in.

The first part of this book dealing with Ann's early encounters with Lucy left me puzzled. The lesbian overtones were confusing. Ann and Lucy occupy the same bed, Lucy kisses Ann with wild abandon; they live together joyously until Ann leaves her to move in with man she later marries. After a very brief marraige she is on her own again--and once again "pursuing" Lucy's love, affection, and approval. By Ann's own accounts, Lucy is extremely jealous of her other relationships.

Ann's love of Lucy is clear throughout book. Less clear is where she drew the line.

I appreciate Ann Patchett for having created this work and for having shared it with the rest of us. With words, she made a portrait of pure friendship--really, a sacred love that I believe Ms. Patchett experienced as a gift during her lifetime.

I saw myself in Lucy and in Ann and recognized the truth and the beauty that appear when a heart is open to see--I mean really see. Love Love Love this book. Heaven knows we can benefit from a story that teaches something about love and friendship that is possible even if the participants are (gasp) imperfect humans. Lucy Grealy experienced a truthful and beautiful friendship during her lifetime, and that cannot be stated as the case for all people.

Being a psych major and having an interest in the bonds between women and how important those friendships are in our lives, I hoped this would be a positive book I could share with friends and pass on to future clients. Contrary to one reader, I don't feel Patchett used Lucy's death as an opportunity to cash in. However, despite her best intentions to chronicle the difficulties and tragedies in her best friend's life and evoke in the reader a fondness for Lucy, I found it difficult to feel sorry for her (Lucy) and at times was even annoyed by her neediness. Worse yet, no-one seemed to mind terribly. No doubt Lucy suffered a great deal during her life, but I feel much could have been done to save her had someone had the courage to show the tough love she needed. Even if it was not the author's intent, the book could prove a helpful tool in psychology classes and to psychologists by providing a text-book example of extreme co-dependence.

I read and reread this book. To be frank, it gave me the creeps. Ann and Lucy have a weird, co-dependent relationship. Ann is clearly obsessed with Lucy, an obsession that began when they lived together in graduate school. Even after they moved apart, the obsession continued. Ann and Lucy dated men, but the two women enjoyed a deep bond--a bond so deep that that Ann seemed "depressed" when they were apart--and Lucy fell into a series of promiscuous relationships with men.

Their friendship, as deep as it was, had lesbian overtones. Oddly enough, the "L" word does not come up in this book. Three of my straight girlfriends who read this book wondered about the implied bisexuality. We could not agree whether it was emotional, psychological, psychic, or physical. The details are hazy. Where is Lucy's side of the story?

I recommend the book, but wish it were a little more forthcumming about certain details.

This book takes a hard look at what makes a friendship work. While we often associate this type of analysis with a romantic relationship, it is equally revealing to explore the dynamics of a friendship between women.

I read the reviews of this book, and I'd already read Autobiography of a Face. I perceived Lucy Grealy as brilliant and probably charismatic, but also I perceived her as needy, whiny, manipulative, demanding, self-destructive, and manic. What I couldn't understand was why so many talented and brilliant people seemed to be captivated by (or in captive to) her. So it was with the anticipation of being enlightened that I gobbled up Ann Patchett's book, Truth and Beauty. Patchett and Grealy were roommates and best friends from their post-graduate years at the Iowa Writer's Workshop, and Patchett probably knew her troubled friend better than anyone else.
But rats. Now that I've finished the book, I still don't get it. I just plain do not get it. Why did Patchett allow herself to be used, abused, and confused by Lucy Grealy?? Is Patchett someone who needs to be needed? Maybe, but that doesn't explain the hundred other people in Grealy's life who jumped when she said Jump. I mean, she called Patchett at 5 AM from her hospital room and demanded apricot nectar. I know what I'd do if a 'friend' called me with that request. But what did Patchett do? She got out of bed, shopped all over New York till she found some apricot nectar, took it to Grealy, watched her drink it down, then held her head as she threw it all up. And this was not an isolated example; there were a thousand others of equal outrageousness.
Go figure.
Truth and Beauty is a beautifully written book - but it sure doesn't answer the central question of Why.

I think the author is in denial.

At least that was the consensus of my reading group. No offense to the author--her sexuality is no one's business but her own, unless of course she chooses to write a sexually suggestive memoir such as this--but why did Ann have such a one-sided relationship with Lucy? Why was she constantly pursuing Lucy? Some people have suggested that there was a Lesbian character to their relationship. I really can't say---but how many adult women profess their love for each other--and share the same bed?

I would go a step further than some of the reviewers below in suggesting that Lucy and Ann had a classical dominant-submissive relationship, with Lucy serving as the dom, and Ann as her sub. The evidence is all over the book. Lucy is constantly demanding something from Ann, ordering her about, treating her like a dirt ball. Ann, perhaps because she was attracted to Lucy, does her best to comply. Even the title of the book sounds like the title of a dom/sub treatise.

I would recommend this book to anyone seeking further insight into the strange relationship of two literary women.

I really enjoyed this book and really fell in love with Lucy. She always said that she would never find love but Ann offered all the love in the world. I enjoyed the writing and the way Lucy was a "lost" soul. I cried when she had her surgery's hoping too this one would be the last. Awsome book of love and friendship!!!

I read through all the reviews of "Truth and Beauty" currently on the the store site, hunting for one that described my reaction to the book. Without success.
There must have been something I missed (besides the shining writing style that's Patchett's trademark). What I found there was a classic case of Munchhausen's Syndrome, the psychotic compulsion to have more and more, and then more, surgeries. Grealy's psychological problems, clearly worse and more disabling than her physical ones, undoubtedly stemmed from a childhood spent as the central figure in a succession of medical dramas, of which she was the star. She just continued wanting to be the star. There was no way, outside of a surgical ward, that she could get the attention and service she demanded.
What she wanted, and was continually asking for, was Love. But what Patchett gave her was attention and service. Was enabling her addiction to therapy. Was a version of friendship and love that was as disfigured as Grealy herself.
Nothing about this book had anything to do with either truth or beauty. Oh, truth maybe. But it was ugly and depressing. I applaud Patchett for trying to love Grealy, but the fact was that Grealy loved only herself, and her "it's all about me" attitude filled so much of her personal space that there was no room for another's love.

Patchett is an unreliable narrator. One cannot trust a writer who presents herself as saintly. Nor does the writer earn trust with a one-dimensional portrait of a needy mascot, which is the "Lucy Grealy" of Patchett's creation. I submit that Ms. Patchett attempted this elegy too soon after Ms. Grealy's death. She has not brought enough truth to Truth and Beauty.

Ann and Lucy are the best of friends. They spend their spare time having intense conversations. They "love" each other. Lucy is a complicated person who lashes out at anyone who dares to confront her---about drug abuse, for example. She is a "writer" who doesn't write much. Ann writes extensively and Lucy is jealous.

I couldn't understand their unlikely attaction. Lucy doesn't seem to have any redeeming qualities. She has sex but doesn't have friends. She turns on her fans. Doesn't pay bills. Her rage is unbelievable.

Yes, Ann's prose is beautiful. But where is the content? I was baffled by this book.

The question is which is which? Read it and decide. Lucy and Ann share an intimate friendship, so intimate that I wondered throughout the book whether it had a lesbian content, active or subliminal. Lucy never married and was unusually fond of Ann; a fondness, which, from Ann's descriptions, often had a physical (though not necessarily sexual) expression. True, Lucy has promiscuous sex with men. But what is the reader to make of her affection for Ann--an affection that expressed itself in naked baths, "spooning" in bed, kissing? . . . Again, it's up to the reader to figure out what's what in this perverse friendship.

As many other readers have noted, I couldn't understand what Ann saw in Lucy.

This is one of the most achingly well written books I have read on a lesbian-like dominant-submissive relationship. Too bad neither the author nor her "pet" are willing to acknowledge the "truth" about their relationship. The truth is written all over the book. This book should be read alongside other more explicit works of its genre.

I read this book thinking I would be reading an inspirational story about a friendship between two authors. Instead, I read a book about a needy, childlike woman(acting more like a girl)who took everything she could from the author and everyone she befriended. While I fully empathize with her disfigurement, I think Lucy Greeley used this as an excuse to not mature and take responsibility for her own life. Ann Patchett must be a masochist because she allowed (in fact, enabled) Lucy to act however she wanted with no consequences. This was not a friendship between two women, this was caretaker and a user feeding off of each other. That is hardly inspiring, beautiful or worthy of a tribute!

I also found it hard to believe that these two women desired to be writers. They looked for every possible distraction in their lives to avoid writing, even when they were at the retreats they sought so hard to be admitted to. I understand an occasional writers block but these people seemed to want to do anything but write.

I was completely uninspired by either of these women after reading this book.

I had planned on reading this book along with Autobiography of a Face Lucy Grealy's Autobiography of a Face.

Unfortunately, I did read Truth & Beauty first and in doing so have no interest in reading Lucy's autobiography. I thought Truth & Beauty was an ugly depiction of Ann's "beloved" friend and can't for the life of me figure out why she wrote this. I can only assume, since it doesn't honor her friend's memory and Lucy's family didn't endorse it, that her motivation was purely financial gain and publicity for herself (ala Janine Latus). It was hard to ignore this and completely turned me off so much so that I will not be reading anything more from Ann Patchett as I have lost all respect for her. (I did read this book in its entirety, as I was a fan of the author's and I was waiting for Patchett to redeem herself. But that never happened.)

With "friends" like this...

Note: if you feel you *must* read this, please consider checking it out at the library and not purchasing it or adding to the author's profit at the expense of her friend.

Ann and Lucy were infatuated with each other. As graduate students at the University of Iowa, they lived together in an intense,passionate relationship. True, they both saw men, but what is the reader to make of Lucy crawling into bed with Ann, leaping into her arms, sitting on her lap, and(endlessly) asking her if she "loves her best." Is this a platonic friendship?

Although the L word doesn't pop up in this book,I think it's reasonable queston to ask----and a reasonable question for any reader of this memoir. what exactly was the nature of their relationship? Why did Lucy never marry? Why did Ann end her marriage after a few years of trying it out? Why did they never quite lose their sense of intimacy?

Ann doesn't answer many of these questions---or glosses over them as if they would not even occur to the reader. At first I thought she was just a novelist trying to write in an unfamiliar medium. Then I wondered if she had something to hide. I still don't know.

Lucy and Ann are the best of friends. They even share a twin bed together. Ann gazes at Lucy during long, leisurely, naked baths. Ann does Lucy's bidding, whatever the personal or financial cost. I was shocked by Lucy's demands--and more shocked by Ann's willingness to comply, like a leashed dog.

I kept expecting Ann to go down on Lucy, what with all the kissing, sleeping together, and long, hard stares. This book reminded me of the art house film 9 and half weeks, except for the fact that in this case the portagonists are both females.

A lousy book by a typical and quite untalented iowa type or model or what have you will swill writer. Poor sad Lucy being used by in death, she deserved a grander tribute. Just buy Lucy's book and pass on this self serving untalented trash.

This book has some beautiful passages. Some, of which, have stayed with me for a while after reading. The last few pages are gorgeous. I also can't get the image of loneliness as Grand Central Station out of my head.

For all of its beauty on the page, though, the truth seemed to fall a little heavier to one side. The storyteller is writing a story about an actual friendship, and though, she is quick to point out her friend's weaknesses, she, herself, remains basically faultless. I couldn't shake the twinge of skepticism that arose when I realized this dynamic wouldn't change throughout the novel. Though, I don't doubt the storyteller is loving and caring in her deeds, it just felt like I was missing some kind of piece to the puzzle, a weight anchoring our narrator and providing a better balanced book.

But, Lucy was always falling and Ann always picked her up. It may be true, but not completely so, right? Everything I know about people and relationships informs me that this can't be completely so. Relationships, with all take and no give, don't last that long, and they don't invite the kind of intimacy we see with these two women. Then, again, this is nonfiction, so I can't encourage someone to write over the truth as they see it and as an outsider, I can only guess at what the truth may be... but (spoilers): Towards the end, I felt Lucy hit a nerve, when she said Anne loved Lucy for making her feel like a saint. The idea was quickly dismissed by the narrator, but that felt real to me. That was a slice of the actual give and take of a relationship. There was both beauty and truth in the reveal of that "flaw". I wish I had read more of that.

So, I read it as an incomplete truth, but certainly, a beautiful book.

It was a book about many things. There is the friendship between two young women writers. It dealt with the pain of a cancer survivor who lost part of her jaw in the process of saving her, and the many painful surgeries she endured to make her beautiful so that a man would love her. Addiction to pain killers is a way of dealing with emotional and physical pain. I was about a third of the way through this book when I realized it was non fiction. The medical descriptions of procedures were very vivid. I had just finished Patchett's book ,Commonwealth, and found some commonalities--powerful bonds formed between people not of blood Kin and an author using another person's story to write their book. I can see why the family of Ann Patchett's friend might be upset. Overall, it was an unforgettable read. Whether or not we find love from the opposite sex depends so much on how we look.