You Suck: A Love Story (Bloodsucking Fiends)

Moore is truly a comedic genius, you will fall in love with his oddly familiar characters from the 800 year old vampire roaming the city in a yellow velour track suit to the perky 16 year old goth chick. if you're looking for a good laugh and characters that you can't help falling in love with, this is the book for you.

This is another entertaining book in the Christopher Moore line up. His original story lines and sarcastic humor make this a non-stop read. Make sure you read his books in chronological order for maximum entertainment value.

I've run into the odd mention of humorous vampire novels so I sought this out. I haven't yet read the first in the series, but this was amusing and quick -- altogether a very nice distraction. The ending felt rushed.

If you're not already a Christopher Moore fan, it may take you awhile to get into YOU SUCK. I've never even read DRACULA, so it took me longer than most, I would assume. However, there's no denying that this guy is funny.

The two vampire lovers, Jody and Thomas C. Flood, didn't really float my boat, but their minion, sixteen-year-old goth girl Abby Normal, was a hoot, especially during her scenes with the two homicide cops. Abby goes to Allen Ginsberg High where the mascot is a Fighting Beatnik. She wears a T-shirt with a Byron's picture on it. She says of him, "I would do him on sharp gravel if I had the chance." I personally think the book would've improved immensely if Moore had structured the book around Abby's journal.

A big drawback for me was the number of characters. There are too many Animals (Tommy's buddies who work on the nightshift at Safeway) for one thing. I could never keep them straight. Moore throws in a couple of new characters at the end to further confuse things.

I was also confused about how you get to be a vampire. Some of the characters turned to dust after being fed upon by the vampires; others seemed to be a food source; others came back as a vampire.

The eight-hundred year old vampire, Elijah Ben Sapir, also doesn't get enough stage time. I would've liked more back story on him and his three pals who show up at the end. I know some of this is explained in the earlier books, but a little summary would've helped us newbies.

I got confused only a few times during this book. But that was because some of the characters weren't introduced very well and just thrown in there. The story was ok but I expected more and the ending was a bit surprising. There were a lot of funny moments in the book but it was kind of vulgar. Which is ok but it was a little weird.

I actually finished my second book this week and didn't just quit reading another boring snoozer. Christopher M. Is hysterical, insightful and grasps the douche in both liberal and conservative alike. I love Abby Normal, the goth girl's diary and insight into middle upper class white naïveté and baseless, judgmental fear. She seems to have a firm grasp on the pseudo-intellectual, easy answered philosophy of the privileged class. I sometimes listen to these types and think to myself, "I would love to take you to see some of my clients near Hardesty and Van Brunt on the east side in Kansas City where white people fear to tread and prove to you that not only are we all the same but we're often less cultured than a lot of other people." We wrap ourselves up tight in the cloth of the NFL gods or NPR gods or NRA gods and forget that we are just one mistake away from living in a HUD housing project ourselves. Which sometimes actually looks like kind of nice to me with sweet little built in communities. It reminds me of friends I'd make in Mexico in my younger years and one in particular who took me to meet his parents when we first met. We broke bread and I was invited to a dance where I was the the only white boy out there shaking my bones. For the most part the only people I introduce to my parents are the ones I'm going marry. I love Christopher Moore and I don't think I'm even reading his best work yet. He makes me think and laugh and remember and if he could only make me cry he could quite possibly become one of my favorites.

Christopher Moore's "You Suck: A Love Story" is a sequel to his uproarious vampire novel "Bloodsucking Fiends." Readers are reunited with Jody Stroud, the red-headed vampire, and her minion, C. Thomas Flood, who she has now turned into a vampire so that she won't be lonely, and because she just might, maybe, love him. Tommy must adapt to his new life as a vampire, not an easy task considering that he hadn't adapted all that well to his life as a human.

It is a task made much more challenging when an old enemy arises and a new enemy preys upon him and his friends, the Animals. Intially leery of vampiric ways, Tommy soon learns to like his new powers and how impressive he can be towards people, especially the moody teenager emo-semi-goth vampire wannabe Abby Normal. She serves as the couple's new minion and her diary entries, extremely funny forays into a strange mind, pepper the novel. The Animals also find themselves in a hole, having wasted their money on a Vegas call girl named Blue, who has plans for Tommy when she learns that he is a vampire. No matter how much Jody tries to control their new life together, things get quickly out of hand, especially when murders similar to the ones in "Bloodsucking Fiends" start happening once again and the cops start asking questions again.

As can often happen with Moore's comedic nuttery, the plot often gets out of hand. There are a lot of characters and a lot of stories going on, but that kind of mania works in a Moore novel. His mantra seems to be "the more the merrier". It works here because Moore has a deft comedic voice, at times laugh-out-loud funny and at other times sarcastically under the radar. It also works because readers root for Jody and Tommy even though they are supposed to be the bad guys, being undead and all. With all the hoopla surrounding vampires these days (a plethora of movies, TV shows, books, etc...), it is refreshing to read a novel that doesn't take itself too seriously and even has vampires reading vampire literature to learn just how they are supposed to act. "You Suck" definitely doesn't.

Christopher Moore has never disappointed me! The only downsides to his books are the fact that once I start one I have little chance of focusing on anything else ... like going to sleep or getting off at the proper bus stop for work.
This picks up beautifully where Bloodsucking Fiends and, to a degree, A Dirty Job left off. it actually overlaps A Dirty Job timeline-wise, but I still think it would make more sense if you read that before this (and after BF).
NOT a book for those with no sense of humor and/or problems with swearing.

Christopher Moore is my favorite author, and I especially couldn't put this whole trilogy down once I began to read it. I devoured this book (and the others) in record time and laughed out loud often. My husband is hooked on them as well, and it was great to be able to discuss plot points and characters with him. When I came to this trilogy, even though a huge fan of his work, I thought, "Oh great, another vampire story," since I've gotten a tad burned-out on the overdose of vampires and zombies in the media -both subcultural and popular- everywhere you look these days. Turned out I loved these books, the characters are rich and not just one-dimensional, and they're funny as hell. I have a page of one-liners from Moore because he's so incredibly good at them. Dark, twisted, witty and hilarious - those are his books in a whole.
Word from the wise - don't take any of these books to the bathroom with you. I did, and wound up getting lost in the story for god-knows-how-long. It's hard to find a sufficient stopping place, most especially on Abby's ranting "blog entries," and I wound up with numb legs and fearing the ring around my butt would be permanent. I didn't reemerge from the story until my husband knocked on the door to see if I had fallen in or "pulled an Elvis" or something.
Totally worth it, not just another vampire story, not just another love story.

Story Overview

[...]

So begins the witty, sarcastic, bawdy romp that is You Suck -- a vampire book that makes other vampire books look positively Puritanical by comparison.

Tommy Flood awakens to find that his vampire girlfriend Jody has changed him into a vampire so she has company for the rest of time. Although at first he is a bit peeved, Tommy quickly finds that being a vampire isn't so bad -- the heightened senses make their sex even more exciting. However, the problem of food quickly arises. Jody used to feed on Tommy to keep herself alive -- but now her food source is gone and there are two hungry mouths to feed. They solve this problem creatively -- borrowing a homeless man's extremely large cat. In exchange for some booze, the cat is available for their nightly feasting.

Still, a vampire needs minions, which leads to the acquisition of Abby Normal -- teenage Goth and vampire wannabe -- whose diary entries are interspersed throughout the book and chronicle the travails of serving the Vampyre Flood and the Countess.

But even with a minion, Jody and Tommy's problems aren't quite solved. There is the little problem of the ancient vampire who created Jody and is currently trapped in bronze -- where Tommy and his band of vampire-fighting Safeway stock boys (the Animals) put him after robbing him of all his money and blowing up his yacht. And when Tommy's plan to dump the bronze statue containing the ancient vampire in the San Francisco Bay doesn't quite go as planned and the old vampire escapes -- well, trouble is afoot.

But wait...that's not all. The Animals are back from Vegas and have blown almost all the stolen money. But they are not alone. They are accompanied by Blue -- a Vegas hooker whose shtick is that her entire body is dyed blue (you know, like the Blue Man Group). She seems to have a supernatural hold on the Animals (or maybe it is the drugs), but she is slowly but surely getting all of their stolen money. Seeking help from their leader Tommy, the Animals are stunned to find that Tommy is not quite himself anymore. But Blue sees an opportunity.

And did I mention the murder investigation into the mysterious serial killer whose been terrorizing San Francisco and leaving the victims drained of blood?

My Thoughts

This book is not for everybody. I'm just going to go ahead and say that up-front. There is graphic language, drug use, sex scenes, violence, corruption of minors, drunkeness -- well, there is a little bit of everything. If material of this nature offends you, this book is not for you. However, if this stuff doesn't bother you and you have a dark sense of humor, this book is a must read! I just loved it. Let me put it this way, if you like movies like Pulp Fiction and find them funny, then you'll love this book. It has the same dark, twisted sense of humor.

After reading the Twilight books (which take vampires very very seriously), it was fun to see an author have a bit of fun with the concept of vampires. From making fun of Goth kids (who "outvampire" Tommy when he goes to a club looking for Abby) to Abby's reverential treatment of "the Vampyre Flood" (at least until she finds out he's only been a vampire for a week or so -- not centuries), Moore has a lot of fun with the vampire myths. One chapter, simply called "The Last Poop," reads in its entirety:

"So that was it?"
"Yep."
"Never again?"
"Nope."
"Not ever?"
"Nope."
"I feel like I should save them or something."
"Would you just flush and come out of there."

From worrying about Christmas gifts for their families to missing coffee to figuring out how to feed without murdering the innocent (they target those who are terminally ill and offer them mercy killing), Tommy and Jody retain much of their human qualities and compassion. And when Jody talks about how she never really felt safe until she became a vampire, I nodded my head in recognition. (What woman doesn't feel vulnerable when walking alone in a city? Wouldn't superhuman powers, strength and speed make you feel invincible too?)

Moore has a wonderfully sick sense of humor and isn't afraid to to use it. I thought the book was a lot of fun. I'll definitely be seeking out more books by this author -- which include titles such as Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal, The Stupidest Angel, Practical Demonkeeping, and Island of the Sequined Love Nun. I suspect I'm in for quite a wild ride.

A Side Note: Don't underestimate the fun of reading a book entitled You Suck. I was reading this during my son's karate lesson and saw quite a few people eyeing up the cover and furrowing their eyebrows and seeming to think: "Is she trying to tell us something?" It was kind of a cheap thrill.

My Final Recommendation

If you have a dark sense of humor and don't mind graphic language and material, this book might be right up your alley -- especially if the idea of a bawdy, witty romp that has fun with vampirism appeals to you. However, if this type of material isn't your cup of tea, I'd skip this book and look for something a little tamer. Although I found the book very amusing and fun, it isn't for everyone.

Christopher Moore may be my favorite living writer and this effort reinforces my opinion. Though it may not be up to the expectations of some fans, their expectations are quite lofty. Did I laugh as hard as I did with some of his other books? No. However, the book was wildly entertaining and Moore again proves to be the standard setter in contemporary humor.

Picking up where Blood Sucking Fiends (BSF) left off, Jody the new vampire is faced with a new set of problems to compound the previous ones. First of all, her boyfriend is now also a vampire. And her sloppily disposed of rival predictably returns. But Tommy's degenerate friends have brought a scheming call girl into the picture. The call girl desperately wants what Jody and Tommy have, but has no idea of the consequences.

Yet the most poignant satire in the book is the mockery of the teen vampire cultural phenom. Teenager Abby Normal fits into this role and every stereotype that goes with it. Of course, the stereotypes come with a unique Christopher Moore twist.

Vampires generally are not funny. So it is not a stretch to say that vampires have never been as funny as they are in Christopher Moore's series. With surprise returning characters and unique twists, it is a Moore fan's delight.

Christopher Moore's reputation for comic genius relies in no small part on his first vampire novel, "Bloodsucking Fiends." In that book, 26-year old sweetie-pie Jody is turned into a vampire, only to fall for her adopted minion, C. Thomas Flood. The possibilities of eternal life, vampirism, and this romantic couple could not be contained in a single book, so we're back for Round 2 with "You Suck."

We learn in the opening chapters that Jody conned the master vampire Elijah into telling her some secrets of vampirism, including how to turn a human into a vamp. Tommy is shocked to find out that Jody has turned him, which is at turns horrifying (thus, the title, "You suck!") and thrilling ("That's so cool."). Tommy, while undead, remains his endearingly sweet self and while he glories in his increased physical and sexual powers, he retains his uneasiness about taking human life to feed himself - he's steeped in the wholesome goodness that is life in Incontinence, Indiana.

Comically, "You Suck" is aided tremendously by the Animals (Tommy's legion of graveyard shift stoners from the Marina Safeway) and their new addition/ringleader, the prostitute Blue. Also along for the ride are Abby, a spunky teenager who wishes to become nosferatu because it would be, like, so totally cool and would, like, make her sister so jealous. Much of the second half of the novel is told via Abby's journal entries, and while this makes for a refreshing change at first, by the end of the novel I was longing for more of Tommy and Jody and less of Abby Normal's juvenile rants.

Still, this is one heck of a funny book. While it may not reach the same heights as "BF," it's darn close, and that's tremendously high praise. The ending of "YS" is a bit of a cliff-hanger as well, so there is the looming promise that the zany goofball Moore may return to this plotline to give us more vampirism by the Bay. Let's hope.

"You Suck: A Love Story" is sequel to "Bloodsucking Fiends", both books are goofy with glee and mayhem and vampire debauchery set in contemporary San Francisco. These two books also happened to be my introduction to Moore and I'm happy to report the addition of one shiny new fan in his collective.

"You Suck" picks up directly (perhaps even line to line) from the first with Jody and Tommy figuring out their undead lives together for better or worse. What can say about these two other than coo in awe of their sappy adorable love? Jody & Tommy never have a dull moment as pandemonium unfolds in the city once again, you can be sure their beloved co-stars from book one return for the ride. In fact, this time around the Safeway night-crew (aka: The Animals) are the unwitting harbingers of chaos. That chaos being none other than the blue-dyed hooker from Vegas named, Blue.

As a self-proclaimed vampire book nerd I was in stitches over the diary pages of Abby Normal - sixteen year old wannbe Goth girl and vampire minion who can barely contain her inner perkiness. Abby seems to channeling my own angsty vampire obsessed teen years so perfectly that I cant help but laugh at us both fondly.

Since this is a pure pleasure read and comedy novel to boot, I can hardly justify a harsh literary critique - but for some reason I just couldn't stand Blue. Her character was minimally developed and not quite bad so much as annoying... Granted most of the main characters are embodied cliché and stereotypes it wouldn't be fair to single Blue out for her shallow portrayal, yet, I am doing just that. Ah well, to my relief she was less prominent in the second half of the story and I certainly enjoyed the book as a whole.

Reason for Reading: Next in the series and in preparation for the new book that just came out today in the series, "Bite Me".

Summary: This book picks up right where book one, Bloodsucking Fiends, leaves off. Not too much of a plot going on here or maybe small bits of many plots going on. Jody and Tommy are exploring their new relationship. The Animals have all joined together with a blue-dyed Las Vegas hooker who decides to become their leader and wants them to capture Tommy. Tommy has his own minion, a cute goth girl who calls him Lord Flood and Jody, The Countess, and unfortunately Elijah, who was taken care of in book one, has escaped and is out to get them all again.

Comments: Jody and Tommy are such a wonderful vampire couple; they show how it can be done right, with the perfect love match and eternal togetherness and a whole lot of fun! (Bella and Edward go find a coffin!) All the eccentric characters from book one are back with a few new faces: a homeless man and his HUGE shaved cat, Abby Normal the cute Goth girl who thinks vampires are so cool, and Blue the prostitute with blue-dyed skin. The whole book is just a complete riot, one outrageous episode after another that had me laughing out loud. I was very pleased to see Charlie Asher from A Dirty Job show up for a tiny cameo too! I think I have to say I enjoyed this one even more than the first book but the ending did bug me. I'm glad I've read it now when I know another book has been written, I think if I'd read it at the time it was published I would have been quite upset with the ending which just begs for a sequel to be written and three years is a long time to wait for one! Christopher Moore's humour is not for everyone but if you can laugh at yourself as much as others and can take a joke easier than you take offense Moore will be right up your alley. I can't wait to read "Bite Me" now!

Elijiah begat Jody. Jody begat Tommy. Tommy begat Blue. Not by birth, but by bite. The begatting still granted life, but it's eternal life - with special powers. Elijiah, eight hundred and seventeen years old, is a vampire of long experience. Taking up with the young woman, he tutors her in the ways of the undead. He overlooks Jody's resourcefulness, however, and becomes a statue. With Elijiah immobilised, she is free to choose her own consort. Tommy, a naive Midwesterner from Incontience, Indiana proves an inspired choice. They're young, in love, and in trouble. For one thing, the police know who, and what, they are.

Christopher Moore's inventiveness has become nearly legendary. His books may be labelled "fantasy" only under the broadest definition. Set in contemporary environments, his stories leave you looking askance at your neighbours and friends. Just who is that teen in the bizarre dress and make-up? Is she just protesting against normal values, or is she bearing a hidden agenda. "Abby Normal", who slowly takes over this story, is but eight centuries younger than Elijiah. Her own ingenuity builds through the story as she interacts with a succession of "dark lords", the Countess, her mother and the "cops". The "p" is derisively inflected, of course - she has little time for such 'tarded people.

Vampires have special problems, of course. Once transformed, the diet is blood. Regular food, coffee or even plain water brings a violent intestinal reaction. To acquire the blood means hunting. Humans, animals such as rats since this is The City - even insects when times are hard. A trip to the zoo is not out of the question, but thirst must be enhanced by talent, or the vampire entering the cage may not come out intact. Their time is night, since daylight can vaporise them. It's a busy schedule all around, made intense by the knowledge that they are hunted. Sometimes even by their own kind.

Moore's placing the story in San Francisco brings the enhancement of dripping fogs, shady waterfronts, and Safeway stores. Tommy works at a Safeway as a night manager. His stocking and shelving crew are the Animals, a motley group who've made a killing of their own. On a trip to Las Vegas, the Animals acquired a hooker painted blue all over and bring her back to San Francisco. Moore manages to paint the characters with finesse and audacity as he leads them through their personal destinies. Wholly fantastic, yet he keeps them all real enough to hold your attention with every short chapter. Character development is his genius and he applies it here with meticulous care. There's not an individual here for most of us to identify with, or even sympathise over. Yet, there you will sit, turning pages to learn how he resolves the complexities he's created for your enjoyment. [stephen a. haines - Ottawa, Canada]

Christopher Moore's books are a lot like pizza. When his books are at their best like `Lamb', it's something to delight the senses. When they're like `You Suck', well... it's still pretty darn good. `You Suck' is the follow up to `Bloodsucking Fiends', so if you haven't read that book then I recommend that you read it before starting this one.

The book finds Tommy discovering that he has now joined the ranks of the undead... and he's not happy one little bit. This not only means that he has to feed off of the living, but that he needs to find someone to do daytime tasks for him- a minion. He finds it in the teenager Abby Normal, a bulimic goth teenager. Meanwhile the rest of the Animals (his friends from work) have squandered all of their money on a blue skinned call girl Blue, who upon discovering that Tommy & his lady love are both of the nosferatu persuasion, starts forming plans of her own.

I both loved & hated many parts of this book. I loved reading Tommy's experiences as a vampire. I also loved the character of Abby Normal about as much as I hated her. She's annoying as heck, but she's also entertaining to read- especially when she rehashes previous actions, skewing them in the process. (So it balances out, I guess.) The biggest part of the plot surrounds Tommy & Jodie learning vampire life through trial & error, with the big baddie showdown not really occurring until later in the book.

This will be an extremely quick read for most readers- I finished this in a matter of hours. It's not a perfect read, but it got more than a few chuckles out of me. Overall, I have to say that I liked this book. Not as polished as the earlier books & it isn't as meaty (it almost reads like it could have been turned into a short story or novella quite easily), but it's still a fun read.

Read Bloodsucking Fiends First to Fully Appreciate All the Characters in this Sequel
Ever since the masterpiece Bloodsucking Fiends was first published (about ten years before this one) Christopher Moore fans have been demanding in their reviews of that book, posting comments on other websites and voicing their opinions wherever they could that they really wanted to see a sequel. You suck is that novel and is even dedicated (after the copyright page) For my readers, by request. Those of us who were eagerly waiting in anticipation for this sequel after reading it are not disappointed. However I must state I can understand why those picking it off the shelf or ordering it online might be as the publishers don't state anywhere on the book cover that this is a sequel. Instead of adding the words A Love Story under the title they probably could have written something like Long Awaited Sequel to Bloodsucking Fiends or something like this. Reading it as a standalone novel wouldn't be as satisfying and some of the characters would no doubt be a bit confusing. You'd even be wondering what the ones who play a minor role in this one really have to do with the story. So my advice is read the sensational masterpiece Bloodsucking Fiends first and you'll enjoy You Suck a lot more.

In You Suck we start this sequel off with Tommy C Flood in a full blown argument with Jody who he was previously a minion for, angry the she has turned him into a vampire as well. The couple know Jody was only given a few days to leave town by San Francisco Homicide detectives and that they'll have to find a new apartment so they can't be found if they are to remain in SF. Unfortunately though since Tommy is now a vampire he can no longer perform his minion duties such as apartment hunting as like Jody he can no longer be awake during daylight. So the search is on for a new minion, whom Jody says she will arrange but of course the annoyed Tommy decides is something he would rather do. So we meet Abby Normal a teenage goth with attitude, she jumps at the chance to be the servant of the Vampire Flood and awaits in anticipation for him to convert her as well. We are updated throughout the book with a bit of self talking up exaggeration by her various diary entries into the Chronicles of Abby Normal on what is going on. Steve the uni student from the previous novel has finally discovered the cure for vampirism but who would want to go back to being a mortal human. Meanwhile The Animals (Tommy's night filler grocery store colleagues from Bloodsuckng Fiends) have come back from Vegas having squandered their fortunes on their fantasy of sleeping with a smurf. Unfortunately for Tommy his vampire conversion mean he's now the enemy. Their completely blue painted prostitute has plans of her own to capture Tommy or Jody for her own purposes. Meanwhile original vampire Elijah is taking earnings away from other buskers as a bronze statue that just won't move and his jealous rivals have plans to do away with him.

It's a good book that leaves room for additional sequels. Having previously read Bloodsucking Fiends I thoroughly enjoyed it but I can understand how those reading this a standalone thriller would be lost and want a bit more depth to understand the main characters and especially the minor ones such as The Animals.

If you like the surreal eccentric character novels and have read everything Moore has written also check out the authors Bill Fitzhugh (Pest Control's a great place to start), Carl Hiassen (Stormy Weather's as good as any other), Dave Barry (Tricky Business) and Max Barry (Syrup).

Christopher Moore's books are a lot like pizza. When his books are at their best like `Lamb', it's something to delight the senses. When they're like `You Suck', well... it's still pretty darn good. `You Suck' is the follow up to `Bloodsucking Fiends', so if you haven't read that book then I recommend that you read it before starting this one.

The book finds Tommy discovering that he has now joined the ranks of the undead... and he's not happy one little bit. This not only means that he has to feed off of the living, but that he needs to find someone to do daytime tasks for him- a minion. He finds it in the teenager Abby Normal, a bulimic goth teenager. Meanwhile the rest of the Animals (his friends from work) have squandered all of their money on a blue skinned call girl Blue, who upon discovering that Tommy & his lady love are both of the nosferatu persuasion, starts forming plans of her own.

I both loved & hated many parts of this book. I loved reading Tommy's experiences as a vampire. I also loved the character of Abby Normal about as much as I hated her. She's annoying as heck, but she's also entertaining to read- especially when she rehashes previous actions, skewing them in the process. (So it balances out, I guess.) The biggest part of the plot surrounds Tommy & Jodie learning vampire life through trial & error, with the big baddie showdown not really occurring until later in the book.

This will be an extremely quick read for most readers- I finished this in a matter of hours. It's not a perfect read, but it got more than a few chuckles out of me. Overall, I have to say that I liked this book. Not as polished as the earlier books & it isn't as meaty (it almost reads like it could have been turned into a short story or novella quite easily), but it's still a fun read.

Read Bloodsucking Fiends First to Fully Appreciate All the Characters in this Sequel
Ever since the masterpiece Bloodsucking Fiends was first published (about ten years before this one) Christopher Moore fans have been demanding in their reviews of that book, posting comments on other websites and voicing their opinions wherever they could that they really wanted to see a sequel. You suck is that novel and is even dedicated (after the copyright page) For my readers, by request. Those of us who were eagerly waiting in anticipation for this sequel after reading it are not disappointed. However I must state I can understand why those picking it off the shelf or ordering it online might be as the publishers don't state anywhere on the book cover that this is a sequel. Instead of adding the words A Love Story under the title they probably could have written something like Long Awaited Sequel to Bloodsucking Fiends or something like this. Reading it as a standalone novel wouldn't be as satisfying and some of the characters would no doubt be a bit confusing. You'd even be wondering what the ones who play a minor role in this one really have to do with the story. So my advice is read the sensational masterpiece Bloodsucking Fiends first and you'll enjoy You Suck a lot more.

In You Suck we start this sequel off with Tommy C Flood in a full blown argument with Jody who he was previously a minion for, angry the she has turned him into a vampire as well. The couple know Jody was only given a few days to leave town by San Francisco Homicide detectives and that they'll have to find a new apartment so they can't be found if they are to remain in SF. Unfortunately though since Tommy is now a vampire he can no longer perform his minion duties such as apartment hunting as like Jody he can no longer be awake during daylight. So the search is on for a new minion, whom Jody says she will arrange but of course the annoyed Tommy decides is something he would rather do. So we meet Abby Normal a teenage goth with attitude, she jumps at the chance to be the servant of the Vampire Flood and awaits in anticipation for him to convert her as well. We are updated throughout the book with a bit of self talking up exaggeration by her various diary entries into the Chronicles of Abby Normal on what is going on. Steve the uni student from the previous novel has finally discovered the cure for vampirism but who would want to go back to being a mortal human. Meanwhile The Animals (Tommy's night filler grocery store colleagues from Bloodsuckng Fiends) have come back from Vegas having squandered their fortunes on their fantasy of sleeping with a smurf. Unfortunately for Tommy his vampire conversion mean he's now the enemy. Their completely blue painted prostitute has plans of her own to capture Tommy or Jody for her own purposes. Meanwhile original vampire Elijah is taking earnings away from other buskers as a bronze statue that just won't move and his jealous rivals have plans to do away with him.

It's a good book that leaves room for additional sequels. Having previously read Bloodsucking Fiends I thoroughly enjoyed it but I can understand how those reading this a standalone thriller would be lost and want a bit more depth to understand the main characters and especially the minor ones such as The Animals.

If you like the surreal eccentric character novels and have read everything Moore has written also check out the authors Bill Fitzhugh (Pest Control's a great place to start), Carl Hiassen (Stormy Weather's as good as any other), Dave Barry (Tricky Business) and Max Barry (Syrup).

Nineteen-year-old Thomas C. Flood has just woken up and discovered that his girlfriend, Jody, has turned him into a vampire. He's not thrilled with the situation. No more tacos because solid food makes you violently sick. No more sunlight because, well, you get dusted. No more friends because they are actually vampire hunters and will no doubt want to kill you. And, perhaps the biggest downside, no more coffee because any liquid other than blood makes you vomit.

Being a vampire, while it seems easy in the movies, isn't so simple. Attacking a human is kind of creepy and frightening at first. Tommy thinks it's best to practice on other things, just to try it out and get used to the idea of being a predator. When Tommy attempts to practice satiating his bloodlust on a cat, the results are far from the romantic vision we've come to expect. Some things are more primal, like the need for coffee. Tommy and Jody buy a cup of java just to smell it. They miss it. When Tommy discovers that if you add blood to coffee it becomes consumable, Jody becomes much easier to live with.

Tommy and Jody must move, and soon. Tommy's friends, known as the Animals, had once helped human Tommy bronze a savage vampire, trapping him forever. Jody had promised to leave town in exchange for her life. Now that Tommy is one of the creatures of the night, however, the Animals and a duo of local cops prepare to hunt Tommy and Jody down and do away with him. Things of course never go as planned, and another wrinkle is added: Elijah Ben Sapir, the Vampire Lord, is out of his bronze prison and seeks vengeance.

Along the way we are exposed to a young goth girl, Abby Normal (get it?), who wants to be a minion for Tommy; a call girl from Vegas whose gimmick is to look like the members of the Blue Man Group; the Emperor of San Francisco, who feels responsible for those who walk the streets; Huge Cat Guy and his shaved cat, Chet, who wears a red sweater; and we get to experience the thrill that is frozen turkey bowling at the local Safeway.

YOU SUCK is a return to the story of Tommy and Jody that began with BLOODSUCKING FIENDS. Christopher Moore has a way of spinning a yarn that is so welcoming and inviting that it warms you up and makes you want to keep on going. It is a truly fun experience --- offbeat, witty and laugh-out-loud hilarious.

The characters he brings into his stories are so abnormal that they're normal, and we can relate to them or recognize them in other people we know. Then, he takes an incident or an event and exaggerates it to biblical proportions that somehow seem perfectly commonplace within his world. Open up YOU SUCK, or any Moore tome, and you open up an incredible cave of wonders, a veritable Land of Oz.

With frozen turkey bowling.

--- Reviewed by Stephen Hubbard

Christopher Moore's _You Suck: a Love Story_ doesn't seem like it should be read by anyone other than Anne Rice fans or a sentimental teenager, but the old adage of never judging a book by its cover, or title, for that matter, holds true. Moore's _Bloodsucking Fiends_, the first book in this informal series, is much better and more laugh-out-loud funny. I suggest reading _Bloodsucking Fiends_ first.

Moore dedicates _A Love Story_ "for my readers, by request." That's a telling sign of how great the first book is. _A Love Story_ isn't laugh-out-loud funny, but amusing. The main character, Abby Normal, is introduced later in the book, and brings with her some improbably amusing ghetto-speak, in addition to the typical OMG: after a tussle with a vampire, I was "[d]oing a minor booty dance of ownage, perhaps in retrospect, a bit prematurely. (I believe hip-hop to be the appropriate language for taunting, until I learn French) pps. 270-271). Abby is ninety pounds, sixteen years old, and white. In Moore's world, this contrast would not be unusual, but expected.

In fact, even though there is a painted blue female escort involved in the novel (modeled after the Blue Man Group), Abby Normal, the non-vampire, is usually the most interesting character. Moore has always been able to create wonderful, intrepid female characters, and Abby is no exception. Reading one of Abby's diary entries will show you whether this is the book for you: "I am part of the coven! Kinda. Okay, back up. So I slept till eleven, because we're on Christmas break, only it's called winter break now because Jesus is AN OPPRESSIVE ZOMBIE BASTARD AND WE DO NOT BOW DOWN TO HIS BIRTHDAY! At least not at Allen Ginsberg High School, we don't. (Go, Fighting Beatniks!)" pp. 119). There are several amusing diary entries interspersed throughout the action and to offset the other, more mature characters, who happen to be vampires.

But back to the blue escort, who has a slightly more adult internal dialogue: "It takes a meandering road of wrong turns to take a girl from being the milky-skinned Cheddar princess of Fond du Lac, Wisconsin, to a blue-dyed call girl turning tricks at downtown casinos in Vegas, but Blue would be damned if she'd add yet another wrong turn by smothering a golden goose between her proportionally improbable silicon joy orbs. The Animals [a group of male supermarket sales clerks] were her way out, and if she had to stay in character as an Alien Pleasure Unit or a blueberry muffin to keep them on the hook, she would." (pp. 55)

Within the context of Moore's strange world, you will be amused at the different characters and drawn to their idiosyncrasies. Moore is unmatched in his ability to write interesting, strong female characters, and would-be fiction writers would do well to read Moore. Will this book ever be a classic? Probably not. But for a few nights, as an escape from the drudgery of reality, you will find few better friends than Moore.

You Suck: A Love Story

ChristopherMoore

HarperCollins, 2007, 328 pp., $15.36

ISBN: 0060590297

"...you killed me. You suck!" Sometimes even your soul mate can be a pain in the neck. Thomas C. Flood learned this the hard way when, after an amazing night like nothing he's ever dreamed of, he wakes up and finds that his girlfriend Jody has turned him into a vampire! Tommy was an aspiring writer from Indiana who moved to San Francisco for two reasons, to take life in big bites and write about it, and to find a girlfriend. But Tommy was never much of a slick guy, so when he is suddenly turned into an immortal superbeing he is a little out of place. With Jody at his side he goes out into the night to confront numerous problems, including the centuries-old vampire that sired Jody (who apparently wasn't supposed to make any new vampires and needs to right his wrong by killing both Jody and Tommy), Tommy's friends that worked with him on the night shift at the grocery store (who are intent on getting their hands on his money to pay for a Vegas hooker with blue skin), the lack of the ability to drink coffee, growing a foreskin, and a huge shaved cat. Not to mention finding a minion to work in the daylight hours.

All this together creates a catastrophically funny situation in which author Christopher Moore mixes the macabre and the mirthful. You Suck is a riotous sequel to Moore's previous book, Bloodsucking Fiends, and I would recommend it to all adult readers looking for a good laugh or a heartwarming romance. There are a lot of things I could say about this book, but it definitely doesn't suck.

Reviewed by: V

This was a pretty enjoyable read. It could have been a lot better, though. I didn't realize going into it that it was part of a series, so maybe I missed something by not reading the first novel in the series.

It was quite a humorous novel, and I liked that it didn't take itself too seriously. Like I said, it could have been a lot better. It was very, very boring at the beginning. There were also certain chapters (the Abby Normal ones) that I felt could have either been better or just scrapped completely. Those chapters were annoying and just felt like filler.

There was also a problem with how the story was put together. There were so many plot and subplot lines and they, again, just felt like filler. It was hard to keep up with what was going on sometimes. And some of the story was not developed enough.

I wish that this had been better. I really wish I could give it a better review than I've given it, but this is what it really deserves.

Having read and loved Bloodsucking Fiends, which introduces the vampire Jody and her boyfriend/minion Tommy Flood, I was delighted to get my hands on You Suck, the long overdue sequel. Picking up where Fiends left off, You Suck chronicles the further exploits of these two hapless immortals.

Now that Tommy is also a vampire, they face a whole new set of problems, not the least of which is finding a food source other than a giant shaved cat in a red sweater. Tommy's former vampire-hunting buddies are now under the influence of a blue hooker from Vegas who has taken all their money and wheedled them into stalking their old pal. The ancient vampire who Tommy and Jody defeated earlier is back on the prowl and has gotten into a sidewalk war with a street performer. Their new minion, goth girl Abby Normal, is convinced that "the vampire Lord Flood" is her dark master and that Jody is an 800 year old Celtic countess.

You Suck was as much fun as Bloodsucking Fiends, and included the addition of several hilarious new characters, especially Abby Normal and Chet the giant shaved cat. But the ending is more bittersweet than in the first, and leaves Tommy and Jody questioning what effect being a vampire has on being in love. The ending sombered the overall high spirits of the book, but its was still at least 98% as much fun as the first.

The thing Christopher Moore does so well is to make each character speak and act uniquely. None of them sound like the voice of the author and they all come alive within the story. I like that. It's a feat to make so many characters funny and motivated. So, it's with pleasure that I bring you this review of a really compelling book.

Since there have been so many vampire books written originality is difficult to achieve in the genre. Moore opts to tell a quick story about clever characters who happen to either be vampires or be friends with one. C. Thomas Flood and Jody are new to the vampiring game, and they're without guidance since their 'sire' Elijah is trapped in a bronze casting, rendering him a statue. The misfits of the story are the Animals, former coworkers of Thomas from his days at a supermarket. They acquired some wealth and blew it all in Vegas on gambling and hookers . . . well a single hooker . .. . a hooker with blue skin . . . and they brought her back with them.

And that's where the story begins.

It's a quick read, a fun read, kind of a guilty pleasure. It's not a book to change the world or give you insight into human nature or cause you to rethink your fears . . . it's just entertainment. To that purpose it's done well.

- CV Rick

This is the sequel to Blood Sucking Fiends. It helps to have read the previous book because You Suck begins exactly where the previous book ended. Jody and Tommy are vampires in love. They struggle to defend themselves against Elijah, the old vampire who turned Jody but now wants to kill her, and against sundry others also bent upon their destruction. The colorful characters introduced in Blood Sucking Fiends, The Animals, The Emperor and others return. We are also introduced to a hilarious Goth teenager, Abby Normal (a minor character in Christopher Moore's recent novel A Dirty Job), who becomes Tommy's minion just as he once was Jody's. Moore is creating a San Francisco universe of supernatural characters across several novels. Charlie Asher of A Dirty Job is mentioned here in passing and The Emperor and two cops, Rivera and Cavuto, appear in all three books. It helps to have read all of them to get the full flavor.

Both You Suck and Blood Sucking Fiends pay homage to Anne Rice's Vampire Chronicles. The underlying mythology is mostly similar. I did find the previous book fresher and more entertaining. Unfortunately, in You Suck the Tommy character becomes increasingly more neurotic and annoying. Abby Normal, on the other hand, grew on me. Like the previous novel You Suck ends with the door wide open for another sequel.

You Suck begins its bloody tale right where Blood Sucking Fiends leaves off creating additional twists and a few new characters to run a muck in the heart of San Francisco.

C. Thomas Flood, now among the blood lusting undead and Jody, his female counterpart, are now able to live all of eternity together. Well, that was the plan, until realizing now they must seek a new day minion to do their bidding; find a new resting place, needles for blood to add to their coffee, ya know, normal vampire stuff.

Problems do arise when the Animals bring home Blue, a blue Vegas prostitute, in search of any way out of the biz by trying to wean every last cent from The Animals newly enhanced pockets which came about by selling off priceless items from which they found on the yacht of the very first Fiend to walk the streets of San Francisco. That blood sucker is not a happy camper either, he is prepared to take vengeful action towards his predecessors that tricked him and bronzed him. Man, are they in a heap of trouble or what!

You Suck is just another great CM novel that had me doubled over, laughing out loud, and dumbfounded by the images of these maniacal scenarios that gets thrown at us every turn of the page. I do believe that Blood Sucking Fiends would be my favorite out of the two, but do not be fooled, You Suck is just as abstruse, jovial, and just plain fun!

Christopher Moore is one of the greatest authors of all time. Absolutely hilarious and brilliantly imaginative, he is America's own Douglas Adams. His books are full of bawdy humor, perfect wit, clever twists on mythology, perfectly penned prose, charming and real human characters, and an enchanting, engaging sweetness under it all. That said, Bloodsucking Fiends was probably my least favorite of the six Moore novels I had read, so I was a bit reluctant to pick up the sequel, You Suck, as my annual Moore-read. Though the plot meanders and retreads much of the original, it is completely saved by the brilliant character of Abby Normal, ass-kicking Goth teenager who narrates a good portion of the book with absolute hilarity and OMG!teen angst and squeeage. Definitely the best parts of the book are from her point-of-view, highlighting the ridiculousness and comedic situations of the supposedly dark vampyre world. Moore is at his best in that juxtaposing tone. The rest is Tommy adapting to life as a vampire, a blue-painted hooker-turned-vampire chasing them, and some other characters just sort of hanging around. Grade: A-

My first (and definitely not last!) Christopher Moore book, I loved this book and read it in about a week. There were some passages (or even isolated sentences) that were so witty and hilarious that I had to read them over several times to fully take them in. Some of the stuff that Abby said was just ridiculously funny. I read a review in some magazine that said that the Abby Normal diary entries were monotonous by the end, I completely disagree with that, in fact by the end I found myself looking forward to the Abby passages. My only (very minor) criticisms: by the end of the book, it seemed like Moore was working very hard to tie up all the loose plot ends (and there were a lot of them); also, for a major release there sure seemed to be a LOT of typos in this book, but it wasn't too distracting overall. I have already purchased my second Moore book (Lamb) and I would bet I will be reading a lot more of his stuff. Highly recommended and I really didn't need to read the first one (Bloodsucking Fiends) to get what was going on in this one.

Bloodsucking Fiends is my favorite of Moore's novels. Now there is a sequel, and ... Bloodsucking Fiends is still my favorite of Moore's novels.

You Suck starts from a great insight: being a vampire is the best thing that ever happened to Jody, but it's just not right for Tommy. That's the basic tension that drives the characters through this story.

Plot, on the other hand, is provided by three forces hunting down the new vampires -- the police and the old vampire (just like in the first book), and also a Vegas hooker named Blue who ends up coming after them after (literally) sucking half a million dollars from The Animals in a party spree.

If you don't understand my references then it means you didn't read Bloodsucking Fiends, and in that case this book is not going to be your friend. You really need the references from the previous book to enjoy this one.

The book is consistantly funny, like almost all of Moore's books are. Some bits of it are outright hilarious. And the new character "Abby Normal", a Goth teenager who wants to be the minion of The Vampyre Flood And His Irish Countess, steals the show. (For those who have read A Dirty Job, she's the best friend of Lily, a character in that book.)

But, like some of Moore's other sequels, the problem is that the returning characters no longer feel fresh. Abby stands out so far because the others just don't shine as brightly as they did in Bloodsucking Fiends.

Furthermore, as in most of his other books, Moore doesn't really know how to end this story. Endings are always his weakness, and in this one we get a completely random pair of dei ex machini which wrap everything up in just a page or two. He also leaves the fundamental conflict of the main characters unresolved.

Did I like this book? Yes. It was as just good as most of Moore's books, just as funny as most of Moore's books, and just as flawed as most of Moore's books. It was not as great as his best work, but that's still a lot better than almost anything out there competing with it.

Although certainly not Christopher Moore's best work, YOU SUCK certainly holds the reader's interest, with the additional bonus of being a sequel-of-sorts to BLOOD SUCKING FIENDS, his tale of vampirism in present day San Francisco.

For those who've read Blood Sucking Fiends, the story will be familiar terrain. If you haven't, it's probably not that big of a deal, as You Suck does stand alone as a self-contained novel. But those who've read Blood Sucking Fiends will get the past, comedic barbs that Moore so loves to play around with in this newest novel.

You Suck is about three basic people. Well ...not basic. Some of them are vampires. One of these is the hot-bodied redhead, Jodi. New to the undead realm thanks to the bite of an ancient vampire named Elijah, Jodi feels lonely and in need of companionship. Enter Thomas Flood, whom Jodi turns from human to non-human in the "bat" of an eye. Thomas and Jodi are in love, but this goes a little beyond that. Thomas is initially incensed at her attack on his humanness. But he has to deal with it and so he begins to learn the ways of the night. Problems quickly arise, however, when our two new vamps realize that they need a minion, someone to watch over them during their daytime slumbers. Welcome aboard sixteen-year-old Abby Normal (Young Frankenstein, anyone?), a wannabe undead gothster who falls for "Lord Flood" and tries to understand (often wrongfully) about the lives of vampires.

When Elijah -- who was imprisoned in a bronze cast by Jodi -- escapes from his bonds, all hell starts breaking loose.

The Animals, the name given to Thomas' old coworkers at a local Safeway, return from a raucous time in Las Vegas only to discover that their old buddy, Thomas, is a vampire. Not good. And with the Animals comes a blue hooker. That's not "blue" in the sense of depression, but blue as in the color of her skin. Draining the Animals of almost all their funds, Thomas' friends beseech him to loan them some more money so that they can continue partying with Blue.

But Blue discovers something quickly about Thomas. She knows he's a blood sucker and wants to become one herself. With the help of the Animals, Thomas is locked away into a rather dominatrix situation with Blue. When Thomas awakens and then bites Blue, another problem vampire is added to San Francisco's streets. Then the Animals begin disappearing or turning into the undead. But is Blue the only one responsible for this? What has Elijah been doing?

Needless to say, the story is entertaining and a suitably quick read. The biggest letdown is that the laughs are spread too far apart compared to previous Moore works. Although there are some gut-busting moments (mostly having to do with Abby Normal's diary entries), the main heft of the story isn't given over to enough comedic moments.

Even so, Chris Moore fans will eat up (pun intended) this latest installment by an author who knows how to keep his readers interested. But new readers? We'll have to see.

Tommy wakes up to find his gorgeous new vampiric girlfriend Jody has turned him into a vampire so he could be with her all of the time. Tommy is easy-going enough and goes with the flow but he's only 19 and has a lot to learn. Now he has to adjust to a new life, hide his vampirism from his buds (a group called "The Animals") and give up his job at the supermarket. To please Jody, he decides to help her find a minion to do their bidding. This brings Abby Normal, a goth-wanna-be girl, into their lives. With her humorous typical teen journal entries (OMFG, LOL!) and her silly thoughts about goth-ness and vampires, she adds a bit of humor to the book just when I was beginning to get a wee bit bored with a plot that doesn't seem to be going anywhere at all. Moore has a talent for poking fun at stereotypes without ever being cruel. Not my favorite by this author but fun enough.

Christopher Moore sets the bar high with his writing. Very few books written these days are laugh out loud funny. When I read Mr. Moore's LAMB, I got thrown out of more places and had more strange looks on airplanes because I was laughing so hard I had tears in my eyes. Then my son read it (and laughs very loud). FLUKE was close.

YOU SUCK, the sequel to BLOODSUCKING FIENDS, passed the laugh out loud test in a couple of places. YOU SUCK follows former minion C. Thomas Flood, newly converted to a vampire, and his girlfriend, the now forever fabulous red-head Jody (who turned Flood into a vampire and was recently converted herself) as they try to figure out this undead thing.

But the laugh out loud pieces come when Moore turns the narrative over to "Abby Normal", the 16 year old goth/perky female minion chosen by Flood to do the vampires daylight bidding. Her diary narrative makes me think that Moore was a 16 year old goth/perky female in another life! And Blue, the aging Vegas hooker who dyes herself blue as a gimmick, has some good lines as well.

The ending is rather convenient, leaves it open for another sequel. The plot here isn't as compelling as LAMB or FLUKE. But it's a fun read. Read BLOODSUCKING FIENDS first though to get the background on all of the characters. Some of the characters from DIRTY JOB get looped in (as Mr. Moore always does in his writing) but they are minor so that book is not necessary to read before this one.

This was pretty entertaining, though it has its ups and downs. The "up" was following Tommy in his first days of being a vampire, and how he and Jody figure out just what the implications of certain things are -- especially since Jody is such a new vampire herself. The "down" was the Blue storyline. It just felt like a way to keep Tommy's old coworkers in the picture. Really, the best parts of the book were the chapters in the voice of Abby Normal, Tommy and Jody's 16-year-old goth minion. Just think of things a teenage goth would say, and then put them in the vernacular of a valley girl. Definitely the most entertaining voice in the book. The ending is a little weak, in an "oops, time to wrap everything up!" sort of way, but it's not a big deal. These are probably the best of Moore's books, so be prepared to laugh and laugh often.

If you can live with the contradiction that something can be stupid with no redeeming qualities whatsoever and be highly entertaining at the same time (e.g., SNL, Monty Python, and Shaun of the Dead) then you just might love this book. I did.

Yeah, this story is a continuation of Bloodsucking Fiends: A Love Story which I haven't read yet. But frankly, I don't think the characters and plotline are so intricate that you won't easily find your way through the book. Shaving the street bum's cat so that Thomas can suck its blood without getting a mouthful of fur is just as funny regardless of whether the bum or the cat appeared in the first book or not. Same old zany stuff, different day.

If you read another Christopher Moore book, didn't like it, but thought you'd take another chance then think again. If you like Carl Hiaasen and aren't afraid to go a little further out on the limb of the sanity tree, you'll probably enjoy this book. If you've already licked the salt and slugged back the tequila, then you're ready to take a bite of this.

Christopher Moore's Vampire Trilogy (Bloodsucking fiends, You Suck, and Bite Me) is fantastic. I adore Moore's sense of humor--his book is fun to read aloud, because it can get everyone else in the room chuckling. The audiobooks are even better!

You Suck revolves around the struggles of new-found powers and needs that come along with being a vampire. Jody, a beautiful red head, has recently taken C. Thomas Flood as her lifelong lover in the Bay area. Unfortunately, she didn't happen to mention the whole turning-into-a-vampire thing.

They both want to escape from Sapir, and to do so they need a minion to do their bidding during the day. In walks Abby Normal, a hilariously moody teenager, vampire afficianado, who desperately wants to be part of the vampire clan. She's a great character, a cross between the today's goth culture and a college freshman who thinks she knows everything - what else can be expected from a character whose school mascot is the Fighting Beatnik? What's particularly entertaining is the "verbal smackdown" she continually inflicts upon the local detectives, and her journal entries that are part valley-girl and part standup comedy routine.

Eventually the story turns into a five-way (six-way?) battle in which Thomas, Jody, Abby (and Abby's friend) attempt to survive and escape from not only Sapir and the detectives, but also The Animals - Flood's old coworkers from the nearby Safeway - and a Las Vegas prostitute who dyed her skin blue and was hired by The Animals for some fun. Amidst the struggle for dominance, life, and survival, there are all sorts of vampire bites, fights, and jokes to enjoy.

If you appreciate an incredibly well crafted idea, superb character development, tons of twists, great jokes, witty banter, and all that comes with a good vampire story, then this book is perfect for you. Even the supporting characters like the "Emperor" of San Francisco, a bum with illusions of grandeur, and a great cameo by Charlie Asher are perfectly blended into the story.

The only odd part of the book is the introduction of three random characters at the end who evidently know Sapir from long, long ago. Despite the lack of detail, I trust that this is a setup for another novel, and this was Moore's way of introducing the reader to new characters. I'm a Christopher Moore addict, so I am willing to trust him to deliver like he always does.

Before I start, I should say that Christopher Moore's books are, as an entire group, in my top ten, all-time most enjoyable reads. In fact, I have just finished re-reading most of them. It was great to go back and find characters he uses over and over and link the old versions to their new situations. Detective Rivera has been through a lot! (Hey Chris, Howabout updating the adventures of Tucker Case???)

"You Suck" is, of course, a sequel to "Blood Sucking Fiends" and takes us further with the lovable characters, Tommy and Jody as well as The Emperor and his men and the Animals. The addition of Abby Normal to the cast was great inspiration. Her diary entries are too much fun. I suggest you take the time to re-read "BSF" before you read "You Suck" just for fun and to make it seem like a longer book - Chris's books are never long enough.

Keep writing Christopher Moore, you are one of the few authors I buy in hardback, simply because I can't wait for the paperback.

By the way, it's fun to carry a Christopher Moore book around with you. The titles are a great conversation starter.

I had read Christopher Moore "A Dirty Job" and was quite amused by it comic/supernatural plot involving the Grim Reaper. "You Suck" is similar in vain, it tells the tale of Jody, a gorgeous young redhead who's relatively new to the whole vampire thing. She falls in love with Tommy who she turns so that the two can be vamps together. The blood sucking couple tries to get a handle on their new life style while events around them slowly come to conspire against them. The "crew" that Tommy worked with (in the prequel "Blood Sucking Fiends") is now debating whether to stake Tommy. There's also two detectives (again from the prequel) trying to push the young couple out of town. There's a blue stripper who begins to think that perhaps vampirism might be a way out club dancing. And then there's a Goth teen named Abby Normal who wants to be the couple's minion. There are more sub plots and minor characters, but I think you have a basic understanding of Moore's use of overlapping plots and multiple characters. It sure worked in "A Dirty Job". In fact, some of the characters from that book also make their way into "You Suck" with mixed results.

Sadly, "You Suck" is a disappointment. The multiple plots never quite come together like they should, some in fact just sort of wander off aimlessly. Tommy and Jody seem like a nice couple at first, but their characters don't evolve beyond our initial introduction. The character of Abby Normal comes in as a sort of back up narrator as we're made privy to her diary entries. Abby's naiveté is enjoyable but I found her chapters to be a sort of easy way for Moore to quicken the exposition and skim over the details of the story. I eventually felt cheated by this device.

The worst part for me in reading this book is that I didn't find out it was a sequel to "Blood Sucking Fiends". No where on the jacket or in the book I bought does it mention this. I don't blame Moore for my frustrations. It's not his fault but his publisher conned me, but I would have never read this book if I knew it was a sequel. I'm sure that alone cost this review at least one star. Be forewarned.

This is Christopher Moore at his finest. If you haven't read anything by this author before, do yourself a favor and go buy one of his books -anything really, and you're likely to be hooked. This particular book is a sequel and while you don't have to read the first one, it makes the story even better when you recognize characters and discover what mishaps they have blundered into -you'll enjoy getting to know each member of the cast, I promise. The story is fast-paced, silly (in a good way), romantic (in a slightly twisted fashion) and definitely a great way to spend a couple of hours on a rainy day (or on a sunny day, for that matter).
Oh, and Christopher Moore is the King of one-liners and he doesn't disappoint with "You Suck". I'm still prone to burst out laughing at the most inappropriate times when some of his stuff pops into my head.
If you need a laugh (and who doesn't?) Moore is ready to tickle your funny bone.

The only negative feeling I possess right now after finishing You Suck is this: How long must I wait for another book by Christopher Moore?!?

This sequel (though it is not completely necessary to read Bloodsucking Fiends to "get" or appreciate You Suck, reading BSF adds texture to the story), this book can indeed function on its own. What I am always concerned about with sequels is that the characterization may suffer some, that the characters would not be as realized in the sequel on the assumption that the first book was read, that the characters are known by the reader already. Not the case here. Christopher Moore has many great gifts in his writing and one of the big ones is characterization. Moore's characters are always so fascinating, and multi-faceted, and REAL in that surreal, kind of way!

I am often so disillusioned with contemporary fiction, especially fiction that tries to be satiric is that it is often forced and the characters are often so flat, and the story is either dry or seemingly pointless. This is never the case with Christopher Moore. He is so invested in his characters and this helps his readers become invested as well. His characters resurface in his books and this further creates his cooky and lovely and surreal and wonderful world I never ever want to leave. If you are just beginning to read Moore, I would start with the first one -- "Practical Demonkeeping," then maybe BSF and then You Suck. I just think it would be more of an experience for a reader going into this knowing Moore's voice and talents with setting a satiric and wonderfully weird landscape.

Write another epic soon, Chris! Love you!

You really must read Bloodsucking Fiends first. And then A Dirty Job. Moore is a writer who incorporates familiar characters and brings them into other stories now and then. So it's nice for the long time fan to see someone familiar to them. Like an old friend showing up in a new story. I think this book in particular would be a lot easier for people who had trouble keeping all the characters separate, etc., if they'd read his previous books first.

There are things he throws in there at times that are simply tribute to other stories, such as when Jody brings the cigarette case into Charlie Asher, the main character in A Dirty Job and the boss of Lily, Abby Normal's best friend.

I really love reading Christopher Moore books, even though he's the reason I'm no longer allowed to read in bed. He is just so funny! It isn't one liner after one liner. He's funny in an absurd sort of way. He seems to be laughing at everyone and everything, but he's so dead on about it and never mean that you have to laugh with him. This book is no exception. Abby Normal's diary really steals the show.

Even better, he's usually a pretty quick read. I don't even have to recommend him to people anymore. My daughter always picks something by him to read for English class and then all the teachers want to borrow it and pass it around. He's fun!

well i just finished this awesome sequel to the awesome bloodsucking fiends. the whole time i could not wait to finish this book and now that it is i cant wait to see what happens next in the line of chris moore books. this book was filled with the same cast and characters as in blood sucking fiends but with two awesome new additions: abby normal and blue. abby normal becomes the minion of his dark lord flood and her mistress of the dark night jody by way of allowing tommy to partake upon her life blood. abby is this loud, outspoken girl at the ripe old age of 16 who has a mouth that could nake even myself blush. the book really comes to life with her narations and her constant battles she has with her social life and her work life. in her constant desire to become a night walker, she tries very hard and very fearlessly to protect her master and her mistress. abby in her own right should have a book and i gyarantee it would be outright zainy and way fun. oh, the things that came out of her mouth, it makes me smile really big.finally the next great addition to this book is the female pornstar/hooker/smurf lookalike named blue. without going into too much detail, blue is a power hungry, money obsessed hooker that tags along with a group of individuals and when she finds out that....i cant. i have to stop. you suck is the continuation of the hardships life has when you are a blood sucking fiend. if you enjoyed bsf then i gurantee you will enjoy this book probably a little moore.

Elijah is an eight hundred years old vampire suffering from ennui so he turned Jody Stroud into one of his kind and taught her how to survive before she turned her boyfriend Tommy Flood after drinking from him one time too many. Elijah is now trapped inside a bronze statue that eh cannot escape from while Tommy has only been a vampire for two weeks and Jody not much longer; they remain ignorant about their new condition.

Tommy's friends, the Animals, go to Vegas using Elijah's money. The police take Elijah's collection and inform them they will not stake them if they leave the city immediately. Tommy's supervisor knows he turned and calls the cops while Elijah escaped his incarnation and seeks revenge. Tommy, Jody, the wino William, his cat Clint and sixteen years old Goth Abby prove no help as they struggle to survive against a big bad angry adversary.

Christopher Moore is in top form as he writes a hilarious love story about two fledgling vampires and the people who want them dead. Jody relishes the change because she no longer fears living while Tommy seeks returning to being a human. Their antics along with a delightful support cast, even ancient Elijah, make YOU SUCK a fun happening.

Harriet Klausner

Despite the foolhardiness of giving a book such an obvious target name, Christopher Moore's on his game with this one, a sequel to the whacked-out 1995 undead romance Bloodsucking Fiends. The story picks up immediately after the first one left off: Tommy Flood, an aspiring writer from Indiana who leads the night crew at a San Francisco Safeway, has fallen in love with Jody Stroud, a newly minted member of the pale community. The first book was all about their romance, but this time around, Jody has decided to fully commit to their relationship. To that end, she puts the fanged mojo on Tommy, who wasn't expecting to wake up dead.

This doesn't sit well with the two homicide cops who investigated some of Jody's misdeeds in the first book, nor does it go over well with the Animals (Tommy's former crew), who got a taste for vampire hunting when they helped Jody and Tommy take out Jody's sire. Throw in a blue-painted Vegas hooker who sees eternity in her future, a teenaged minion who's too Goth for anybody and Jody and Tommy's ongoing research into what vampires can actually do ... and set it in San Francisco, one of the few cities where a coven of vampires could fit in without causing a scene. Mix well and serve; hilarity ensues.

One of the joys of Moore's novels is that he doesn't wink at the audience in his work. He sets up WTF situations and has the characters play them utterly straight; just because it's weird, you can almost hear Moore think, doesn't mean it's not their lives. This approach allows the humor and character interaction to happen organically in the story, and not be slapped on because the author thought it was a good joke. Yes, the things that happen are outrageous, but the characters themselves are not: they are regular people in irregular situations, flawed but likable heroes who try to get through their lives despite being vampires or reapers or Christ's best friend (these are all from Moore's books, for the uninitiated). Jody and Tommy, the Animals, even the so-called bad guys all have understandable hopes and aspirations. It takes a sure hand and steady control of tone and vocabulary to pull this off consistently in one book, much less several, and Moore is an assured stylist in this regard. His prose is always witty and sympathetic, with faint overtones of the amused observer POV that the British do so well (Moore's American, but Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett cast long shadows in his books).

Overall, You Suck is a well-paced, laugh-inducing romp through territory you think you've seen before, but not like this. It's even, in a strange way, romantic. And hey, anytime a main character gets bronzed twice in the course of the book -- as in the metal, like parents do with baby shoes -- you kind of have to sit up and take notice.

I hadn't heard of Christopher Moore until I stumbled upon a Borders Shortlist e-mail one day promoting the release of this book. It sounded kind of interesting so I remembered it and put it on my Library list. I finally decided to pick it up and took it with me on a business trip finishing it easily in one day flat. I also later bought the book on CD and listened through it. I haven't yet read his "prequel" novel, "Bloodsucking Fiends"(although I certainly intend to), but, thankfully, "You Suck" requires little foreknowledge of the characters thanks to the exposition provided in the book. As for the content, I found it to be a fun romp through the life of C. Thomas Flood as he struggles to adjust to being a vampire (thanks to his vampire girlfriend, Jody) and the additional complications that ensue when he accidentally turns a hooker that his wasted friends bring back with them from Vegas into a vampire who then turns some of his friends into vampires. He also battles against an old vampire, who had previously turned his girlfriend, Jody, into a vampire and is seeking revenge against Flood for his previous defeat at his hands, as well as cops seeking to drive Flood and Jody out of town and stop the new spate of Vampire-related killings. The madcap action of the story is leavened by a vampire-obsessed goth girl named Abby whose pop culture-laden diary entries continue the narrative of the story from her own perspective. I thought that the book was quite humorous and witty and never dragged or slowed down. I think that this book would make for a great movie. The only major quibble I have with the story is the ending (which won't be discussed here) but Moore, thankfully, leaves the story somewhat open-ended should he (hopefully) choose to revisit the story at some point.

Wow, this was my first time reading Christopher Moore and all I can say is wow! I love his writing style. The book was funny to say the least. This story follows a vampire girl, her boyfriend (first minion), his friends, the vampire that turned her, and a young teen girl that wants to be in the vampire crowed. Once I started to read it I couldn't put it down. One down side is that there are a lot of swear words in it, but that just makes the comedic part of the book, since it's so outrageous. I can't wait to read more of his stories!

I've been reading Chris Moore ever since his first book came out (Practical Demonkeeping). I've been a huge fan of his since then. The stories were great, the humor was sharp and would sometimes totally take you off guard. I remember having to be careful about reading "Bloodsucking Fiends" in public because a couple of times I laughed out loud before I could catch myself. The characters were carefully thought out, so was the plot.

That was back when Moore was trying, I guess.

Now, his handlers have told him to write faster, and it really shows. The current books aren't nearly the quality of the previous ones, and I'm really sorry to say that.

Even worse, though, I think that Moore found his niche and he's writing to it. He got his audience who love the freaky parts of his stories (the twisted humor and the kinky stuff), and those were a lot of fun. But. How can I say this? It's like frosting on a cake. It's great. But he discovered that people like the frosting, and now that's really ALL he does. Be honest and go back and look at his books. The characterizations? Far more shallow (you can say they're good enough, but compared to his old books, these characters are 2D). The humor? It never catches me off guard, because it's.... so.... constant... so... uniform.... Is it because the author has become jaded, or cynical, or just rushed? I dunno. But it makes me sad. There wasn't anybody who could do stories like the old Moore. Now, they just seem to be coming from an extra-clever 14 year old.

It seems to be working well for him though. I used to be frustrated because I never saw his stuff in the bookstores. Now it's always there. Kind of ironic. When he was great, you couldn't find his stuff. Now that he's become mediocre, it's everywhere. Oh well. Oh well. It's all frosting, no cake. After awhile, it starts to get to be too much, if you're a grownup. Which Moore _used_ to be...

But seriously, people. You can tell me you liked the book. And I'll say "Good for you." But it's not his best. Not by a great leap and a bound. Bloodsucking Fiends, for example, The cleverness of the title "Bloodsucking Fiends - A Love Story." It's subtle, catches the imagination. "You Suck"? I figure it took about 1/100th of the effort coming up with the title. That lack of effort is seen everywhere in this story. Now, let me just go find my old copy of "The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove"....

"You Suck" is the much-anticipated sequel to Christopher Moore's most popular novel, "Bloodsucking Fiends." This book picks up right where the last one left off. C. Thomas Flood wakes up and discovers that his vampire girlfriend, Jody, has turned him into a vampire as well. Both of them need to get acclimated to vampire life, although Jody does have slightly more experience than Tommy. Together, the couple must secure blood to drink, acquire a new apartment, and hire a minion to do their bidding. They end up with 16-year-old Abby, a goth chick who is slightly obsessed with the undead, but actually turns out to be a pretty decent minion. It's a good thing Jody and Tommy have Abby in their corner, because it turns out that the guy who turned Jody into a vampire is on the loose (and super pissed off). Also, Tommy's former colleagues, the Animals, have spent all their money on an exotic blue prostitute (named Blue), and now they're out for revenge. Blue the Smurf-like hooker eventually turns into a vampire as well, and life (well, the afterlife) really does start to suck for poor Jody and Tommy.

I really enjoyed this book. Moore is absolutely hilarious, and his books are some of the most original novels out there. "You Suck" has everything from gigantic shaved cats to blood-laced mocha lattes: very funny stuff! For me, I thought the overall plot of the book wasn't as strong as "Bloodsucking Fiends." Moore had more than a decade to work on this sequel, so I expected a bit more in terms of actual storyline. Still, fans of the first vampire book will not be disappointed.