Kill Him! The Pilgrimage of Psychotherapy Patients by Sheldon B. Kopp (1972-06-03)

I originally read this book about 35 years ago and have recommended it to others. I recently bought two copies of the book from the store to give as gifts.
It is a good tool for self-learning and self-examination.

Very Old Thinking, depressing and out of date for 2014.
Bought the book because I heard about it on a TV show I loved.
I'm sure I got something out of it, but not sure what it is.
Best part of the book is the Title, which basically says it all.

If Kopp’s title seems gratuitously bellicose and totally inappropriate for a book about psychotherapy, you may not recognize that it’s a quote from the 9th century Zen (Chán) Buddhist master, Linji Yixuan. In reality, the quote isn’t bellicose and is quite apropos of Kopp’s message. Linji was just saying that if one collects sacred cows, one is unlikely to be liberated from delusion and find a quiet mind. Kopp’s primary point is that patients tend to deify their therapists, thinking of therapists as people who can “fix them.” In reality, the therapist is a flawed human who can only help guide the patient on a personal pilgrimage. However, when patients find out that the therapist isn’t a sage who can make them feel better as if by magic without any real change on the patient’s part, they become disillusioned and the wheels can roll off any progress they may have made.

Pilgrimage is the central metaphor of Kopp’s book. The psychologist uses an interesting approach, without which I doubt I would have read this book. He uses pilgrims of classic literature as models. The second, and by far the largest, part of the book lays out the various paradigms of pilgrim. The use of works like “Gilgamesh”, “Macbeth”, “Don Quixote”, Dante’s “Inferno”, Kafka’s “The Castle”, and Conrad’s “Heart of Darkness” makes for a work of interest to more than just psychotherapists. Kopp skillfully employs the wisdom of both the Eastern and Western worlds, often in pithy stories that have been around for centuries.

In addition to all the well-known tales that Kopp relies upon, the latter part of the book has some interesting personal stories from when Kopp was working as a therapist in a prison.

I think this book offers some intriguing food for thought regardless of whether one is either a psychotherapist or a psychotherapy patient.

This book is a wonderful read for anyone who wonders, worries or agonizes about the meaning of life, and whether they're doing it "right." Psychotherapist Kopp wrote this book in 1972, but it still works today.
Whether giving or receiving therapy, this book reminds us that we are all humans -- nobody has all the answers. The eschatological laundry list (which I've seen roaming around the web, but never attributed to Kopp) has become a classic.
1. This is it! 2. There are no hidden meanings
3. You can't get there from here, and besides, there's no place else to go
4. We are all already dying and we'll be dead for a long time.
5. Nothing lasts!
6. There is no way of getting all you want.
7. You can't have anything unless you let go of it.
8. You only get to keep what you give away.
9. There is no particular reason why you lost out on some things.
10. The world is not necessarily just. Being good often does not pay off and there is no compensation for misfortune.
11. You have the responsibility to do your best nonetheless.
12. It is a random universe to which we bring meaning.
13. You don't really control anything.
14. You can't make someone love you.
I'll stop there -- there's more in the book, and if you find the list discouraging, you need to read the book. If you find the words encouraging, you need to read the book. Add it to your list of books to give friends who are feeling glum and hopeless.
Use it as a group discussion book!
After reading this (at different stages in my life), I still find it centering and soothing. A good addition to the self-help library, along with The Road Less Traveled.

Sheldon B. Kopp narrates his existential voyage through the human experience. It is definitely not quite nihilistic, but similar. Killing the Buddha on the road means that no meaning that comes from outside ourselves is real. We need only recognize that we already have our own Buddhahood. The secret is that there is none, and no solution, and it comes down to just being what you are. His philosophy from his pyschological context has some of the right ideas, but he spreads some of the wrong messages. I enjoyed the book however. He uses the telling of tales from our ancestors, metaphors for our struggle to fit into existence. I speculate that this is to emphasize our story-telling nature as animals. With his version of wisdom, there is no guru to teach us and we are no one's disciple. In this he is the messenger of bad news and expects to disappoint those who search in life as if there was some underlying meaning in the world. He's sure that its in vain, and ultimately so are our lives. If you are someone disturbed by this, then reading his book will transcend those feelings. If you aren't by now... I recommend it ;¤)

A brilliant examination of modern day psychotherapy as it relate to the spiritual search for enlightenment. Every therapist should read this book and anyone who has spent a lot of time in one form of therapy or another will find so much that is familiar in this book. I recommend it most highly.

I love how Dr. Kopp elucidates the fact that life is a continual pilgrimage.
The fact that all truths are relative to our own individual lives.
We must constantly work out our individual paths, with courage, faith, and take risks.
There are no 100% correct paths, the way may be uneven
"What is the Happy Life? "Self-Sufficiency, and abiding tranquility, the gift of greatness of soul that perseveres in a course judged right"
Seneca
Great Metaphors and historic parables with commentary
A deep deep book; come back to it again, and again

I have always been an odd person. This book made so much sense to me. Take from that what you will... but if there has always been some puzzle inside of you that you're drawn to try to solve, this book is a tool to do just that. I don't want to give away too much, but you are stronger then you know. This is a great book. It discusses very serious subjects in ways that are easy to comprehend, and that plant seeds inside you that blossom and grow as your understanding of yourself does. A great read. Truly.

I started reading this book despite the offensive title and found it to be a hodgepodge of rambling and irrationality masquerading as psychobabble.

The author does not understand that the Buddha is a person, a human being, is a nature that all of us possess. Instead of offering help, this book is antireligious defamatory and offers a poor outlook on how to live as a normal human being.

This is the first book in 48 years of reading that I destroyed rather than donate or resell it. I tore it up and tossed it on the fire.

Sheldon Kopp captures the essence of therapist-client as a parallel journey of two human beings in a relationship dependent upon the ability of both to become careful (full of care) for the other while traveling through metaphors, symbols, sagas and myths, each telling their stories along the way. His eschatological laundry list is a necessary and existentially humorous bump with reality. I recommend this book to all clients seeking to enter the sacred ground of a therapeutic alliance where change, transformation and healing are to occur. Sheldon Kopp's serious pragmatism and humorous satire hold the reader to the task of "learning the dance" and becoming aware of the process of being in therapy.

I have read this book twice and thoroughly enjoyed it both times. Dr. Kopp is able to demystify the process of psychotherapy through his experiences as a psychiatrist and human being. The stories related are thought provoking, inspiring and enlightening. It also includes the author's "Eschatological Laundry List". Anyone seeking a better understanding of themselves and their lives will reward themselves by reading this book.

Marvelous book. Filled with beautiful insights and wisdom. The author is a genuinely caring man who is also willing to share his own dirty laundry. I highly recommend this to all those who are seekers of truth. Although it is primarily listed as a book relating to psychology, I laos found it deeply spiritual as well.

Just as Rogers was said to have taken the patient off the couch, Sheldon Kopp takes the therapist off his/her pedestal. A must-read for anyone who has ever struggled with the conflictual aims of the therapist and client in a therapeutic process. Unfortunately the latter chapters tend to be more autobiographical and the book loses some of it's impact.

Honestly, I stopped reading at: "...sent my female patients to women's lib organizations..." Right, as if becoming career oriented and foregoing child-birth is what will make women truly happy. Ohhh-kaaaay. Have a partial birth of your unborn child while you are at it, and watch the doctor puncture the child's skull with some foreceps. That's where that kind of thinking leads, straight to hell. This book felt sort of like a weak knock-off of "The Breakdown of the Bi-Cameral Mind," what with a chapter devoted to analyzing the Gilgamesh story, which is so vague that you can project on to it anything you like, and Kopp does just that. Yawn.

Honestly, I stopped reading at: "...sent my female patients to women's lib organizations..." Right, as if becoming career oriented and foregoing child-birth is what will make women truly happy. Ohhh-kaaaay. Have a partial birth of your unborn child while you are at it, and watch the doctor puncture the child's skull with some foreceps. That's where that kind of thinking leads, straight to hell. This book felt sort of like a weak knock-off of "The Breakdown of the Bi-Cameral Mind," what with a chapter devoted to analyzing the Gilgamesh story, which is so vague that you can project on to it anything you like, and Kopp does just that. Yawn.

this is an interesting book full of cultural terminology of the 70's thicker than the clouds of cannabis you smell as you read this book. occasionally there is a great insight given, but more often than not the reader is left wondering why a random story is given and to what extent did drugs take part in this books writing. buy it, it's cheap and better than most of the crap on tv, but buy it knowing ahead of time that you will be baffled and enlightened.

This is a fantastic book, however I don't recommend taking it in any literal sense. I was once walking down the road and saw a fat man walking toward me. With out hesitation I jumped on the man and killed him. Unfortunately for me my defense of the book made me do it didn't hold up in court. Now I spend my days in my cell reading Catcher In The Rye, So far it is a very good book as well and I recommend it to everyone.