To Help Your Children Gain Control of Their Lives

The product was exactly what I wanted and is in new condition as stated. I ordered the book from this seller in the am on one day and received it the next day in the mail.
As for the book, I have already read it and wanted a copy to keep at home for a reference, The book helps with your kids and helps the parent as well.
I highly recommend it and ordering from this seller.

This book was purchased for my daughter. She would strongly recommend all the "Boundaries" books. She believes the authors' philosophy of setting boundaries in life and respecting the boundaries of others to be vital for a happy life.

This book was purchased for my daughter. She would strongly recommend all the "Boundaries" books. She believes the authors' philosophy of setting boundaries in life and respecting the boundaries of others to be vital for a happy life.

I gave it only 2 stars because there were some good points made. However my daughter is very smart and a lot of what was said to try as far a consequences if something didn't get completed, well she really didn't care if she couldn't do something or got something taken away. Overall it just seemed to drag on a bit.

Boundaries with kids is based on the technique of giving children choices and following up with explained earlier consequences. It had a fair amount of good advices, however I did find the same ones in other books that did not quote the Bible ten times on each page. I do not mind brief religious comments, but I am not a religious person. Saying that, if I knew beforehand that this book is so deeply Christian, I would not buy it. After some time the Biblical references made me want to stop reading it.

If you grew up in a Christian/Catholic family and church is a part of your life, definitely go for it.
If you are not deeply religious, or come from different religious background – this book is not for you. But don’t worry! There are other books explaining the same techniques in way which does not relate to religion at all.

I have been enjoying the entire Boundaries series and would recommend this set to anyone who is involved in a child's life. I purchased both the book and audio CD, so that I could use them at home and in the car. My disappointment was that the audio CD does not match the book. As I attempted to follow along I found many parts of the text skipped entirely. I looked over the box carefully and did not find any notification that it was incomplete. Perhaps the author has a reason for this?

This is written from a VERY behaviorist point of view. While I appreciate the Christian based logic behind their strategies, I struggled to reconcile this with so much of my research in early childhood development development. I do like that the "consequences" suggested were not so much "punishments" but natural consequences of the child's choices. Overall, I am glad that I read it. Parenting books are meant to give us perspective and help us make our own decisions, not be brainless guides. For that, I am grateful.

Not really any good solid info in this series of books. It's so wishy-washy with info. Do this, but not too often or don't do this but make sure you do do it sometimes. Not very helpful and not as biblically based as they say it is.

All Cloud & Townsend books are very good. Each summer, I donate a couple of dozen "Boundaries With Kids" and "Boundaries With Teens," which my church offers (free) to parents of Vacation Bible School students. I wish the book had been around when my own children were young!

I'm only giving this a 3 star review because it was a gift, and I only ordered it because of the other reviews, and reviews by "outside" people. I may update it if I know anything different, but it looks to be a good, educational, and useful read.

The advice given in the book was good, and a lot of good points were made, but I found the constant references to the Bible very annoying. I am not a religious person, and wouldn't have minded a few references, but it was a little too much for my liking. It read more like a sermon, and I didn't realize that when I had purchased it.

This is the book I've been looking for! My aunt recommended the book How We Love which was very helpful in learning to acknowledge feelings but left me feeling completely stuck on how to work through things with my kids. Does validating their feelings mean I must give in to every feeling? I am I forcing them to "stuff their feelings" when we have to do hard things anyway? My parents over identified with my "pain" as I was growing up and did not push me very hard so as a result I've had to do a lot of growing up as an adult and especially since I've had kids. I did not want my children to grow up feeling incapable of nearly everything and knew I had to do something differently but struggled with the balance between empathy & listening vs encouraging them to take responsibility for themselves instead of trying to keep them from any type of pain. This book has shown me that balance and I will be forever grateful to these authors. Additionally, I highly recommend How We Love but only with this book right beside it.

I do dislike, however, the way Bible verses were tossed in to support their points. The Bible is about who God is, what He's done, and how we should relate to Him. It is not a book about what to do in every potential situation we might have on earth so plunking in a verse regardless of its context to support one's own point is irritating.

For parents wondering what they might be getting wrong, this book will provide the big picture and fill in all of the blanks. Makes a very good case for why boundaries are necessary for healthy development. (Believe me, you will picture every troubled child/adult you have ever known and that alone will provide the motivation for change.) Where it falls down for me is in the specifics. I felt very sorry for the authors' children when I read some of the examples. Too talky talky for me, but you'll get the idea and be able to adapt it to your own style. A good guideline that could be transformative if taken to heart and implemented seriously.

Be forewarned--this is a Christian-based parenting book that isn't really about setting appropriate boundaries for a free-thinking adulthood. It is old and outdated as well. I only read the first chapter and already found multiple areas which do not fit my values or situation.

We were having serious problems with our youngest. Major temper tantrums and no idea what to do about them since we couldn't spank her (part of the divorce settlement). Out of desperation, we bought this book. We have since bought it for two other people and it is the first thing we reccomend whenever anyone mentions that they are having problems with their children.

This book gives concrete examples of the principles that they teach you. It's meant for you to use with your children, but the truth is, you eventually end up using these principles in all of your relationships because they are just that powerful. You are only limited by your own creativity.

The book focuses on providing your children with logical consequences for their actions. They are in control of what happens to them (either by what they do or fail to do). It has nothing to do with you and how angry you are. You are taken completely out of the equation and they no longer have you to blame for what they are experiencing. It takes a little while for that change in thought to happen, but they get it, believe me.

The biggest problem with this method is the fact that it's hard to follow up on, especially when you hate seeing your child so unhappy. However, it is far better to do it now, than later when they have a boss they need to please. In other words, don't let your issues turn you into a bad parent. You aren't doing your kid any favors with that attitude.

End result for us? No more screaming, yelling, and throwing things. We have a happy little girl whom we enjoy very much.

At first it may seem inappropriate to have "boundaries" with kids, since they're so dependent on us for everything at the beginning. But it really is important for children to learn early on that they should respect the needs of others around them, and that it's not acceptable to focus only on their own needs, just as it's not acceptable for a mom or dad to focus only on the child's needs. Even very young children (my kids are 1.5 and 3) can learn that it's not nice to yell and scream every time they want a cookie before dinner, or that people are much more likely to happily cooperate when you say "please."

Teaching healthy boundaries to a small child sets the stage not only for her respecting other people's boundaries, but also for her demanding that others respect her own boundaries. Isn't that what being a 2-year-old is all about? Learning that she exists separate from Mommy, and that her desires are important, too?

In this book, Dr. Cloud helps you understand how to encourage your child's natural exploration of her own desires and needs *in the context of* relationship with everyone else around her. A child doesn't live in a vacuum, and it's good for her as well as good for everyone around her when she starts to develop a healthy sense of how to balance her own fleshly desires with a respect for others' needs. It gives her a sense of security to know that the well-being of the universe doesn't depend on her own happiness.

No joke--this is the best parenting book ever. This book is a must read for parents with children of any age. As a parent of 4 children of different ages the principles of this book work. You'll learn when to say yes, when to say no, to help your children gain control of their lifes. With practical advice and real life strategies you'll become more confident in your ability to parent effectively.
This is a book that you'll want to keep handy so that you can refer to it when you are not sure how to handle an issue. Cloud and Townsend give real hope to parents who want to throw in the towel and just give into their children. The insights given are easy to understand yet a profound method of viewing the whole issue of what it means to be an effective parent. Buy the book for yourself and buy a second one to lend out--its that good.

This is another one of those books that I borrowed and read first. It was so good that I went back and bought a copy for myself for reference. The good doctors Thompson and Cloud give a very good framework for raising useful and productive adults. If you don't want to raise large children, this is the book for you. What I found particularly useful, coming from a fairly disfunctional family, was the amount of space devoted to empathy. If you have been disciplined harshly and unfairly, it can be hard to know how to discipline with kindness. This book devotes a fair amount of space to making your discipline empathetic so that your child understands that the discipline is neccesary, but that it isn't something you are doing just to make him/her miserable. They really help you to always keep the goal in front of yourself and your child, that is: the adult you want them to become, not the child they are now.

This is by far the most amazing parenting book I have EVER read. I have a two year old and an infant and feel much better prepared to raise them to serve God in their lives.

I can't stop talking to my friends about how practical, simple, and easy-to-apply the principles of this book are - I'm reading the book again because it is so full of great information that I have to absorb it for a second time.

I do believe that this book has to be put into practice BEFORE a child reaches their teen years, simply because that is a time when children become adults and it could be more difficult to apply boundaries only if you have not started the boundaries when they were young. If your child is a teen already, this book might just frustrate you because it will make you wish you had started earlier...just to be honest.

I suffered from terrible verbal abuse as a child, and now as a mother have had a very difficult time seeing our daughter in any pain. This book has helped me to understand more clearly that true, Christ-like love gives us the strength to help our children to live assertively, and that while we work to protect them from harm, to try to protect them from every day life and consequences hurts them significantly more in the long run. It did a great job of teaching how to parent with high though realistic expectations of your children, while always giving them the unconditional love and encouragement that they need to have happy, successful lives.

This book has good points but the questions tend to ask a lot of abstract questions. I also don't like the fact that it over complicates simple issues.

There are better books about parenting out there.

This is without a doubt the best parenting book I have ever read! I am a Pastor and a Foster Parent and have greatly benefitted by putting these principles into practice. I know if these principles work with kids who are troubled and come from broken homes, they will work with any children.

I especially appreciate the way the authors emphasize how teaching children boundaries when they are young will set them up for success as adults. They focus on the value of teaching children life lessons while the cost is low so they don't have to learn them as adults when the cost is so much greater. I would recommend this book to anyone with kids regardless of their age.

I have to say that this book is absolutely my favorite parenting book thus far (and I have read many!) As a Christian parent attempting to do the best I can with the 3 beautiful kids that God has entrusted to me-this book has been the most helpful in giving practical insights and advise with how to deal with the day-to-day challenges of raising great kids. I love the understanding that is imparted as to healthy child developement and the encouragement and inspiration this book infuses to its readers. Parenting for Teens is also an amazing book - My oldest child is an 11 yr old girl and this book is chalk full of great advise to learn and implement as your kids are approaching their teen years-not just applicable if your kids are older!

At age 13, nothing had worked. My son was stubborn, uncooperative, lying & lazy - at best. My fiancee threw up his hands in disgust & told me I was on my own with this problem. Reading this book and implementing its contents as I went along, has made all the difference in the world! Seeing all I had done wrong in the past (to help create this monster), and having guidelines to follow to correct the set bad patterns - priceless! The book is written clearly & matter-of-factly. It shows where I contributed to my son's poor behavior. It shows compassion for how difficult it is to change our patterns. This book is worth every penny - worth every moment. I now have a cooperative, responsible, cheerful, loving son! & he has a mom who is firm, loving, and VERY happy!

This was one of the most instrumental books in helping me understand the "how" and "why" to parent my children. I have a very practical approach to life and this book help provide "tools" that kept me from becoming the problem. As a parent, I am very interested in character development in my children and this book was a Godsend. The examples used throughout the book are wonderful and really illustrate the concepts in a real life fashion. It has inspired me to share with others through small groups and it always provides an "awakening" in the parents thoughts. This book comes HIGHLY recommended!! Enjoy...it is funny too.

This book has helped my husband and I to not only be on the same page with our dicipline methods but also to really focus on how our 3 kids behaviors right now in the present will affect their future when they are on their own. It has helped us to set boundaries for them and is also teaching our kids to learn to set firm boundaries on their own with their lives. I had yet to find a book on raising children that is so clear and effective and really guides you through how to be an effective parent for the good of your kids future. I also highly recommend the book "Raising Great Kids" which is by the same authors.

I actually have a question. I am reading through Boundaries with my bible study. I am also going to get this book to read after I am finished with Boundaries. However, I am interested in getting our 11yr old a book she can read to think about boundaries and discuss these issues with us. She is very mature and reads at a 9th grade level. I was curious if anyone had come across a good book to give to kids to read that might follow Boundaries philosophies, and that would be age appropriate for them to read. Thank you

We use this material at our ministry to help parents to improve their skills and understanding as parents. It is proving quite successful.Boundaries with Kids: An 8-Sessions Focus on How Healthy Boundaries Grow Healthy Children

this book has most of the information to bring control to a family. except that this is way too christian based, and complicated for somebody who is not christian to follow through, nd they include too many biblical references that takes away the purpose of the book. overall, this book is great. but dont include too many biblical references.

Sen. Jesse Helms little book is well written and worth the read. In this book he gives a clear example of government wasteful spending and calls for personal responsibility on the part of his fellow legislators. If more congressmen took to heart his message we wouldn't be in the financial mess we're in today. His title "When Free Men Shall Stand" could be summarized by saying "when free men will stand up and take responsibility for themselves" instead of passing the buck.

Another credit to Cloud & Townsend! I've recognized both positive and NEGATIVE parenting styles I've developed over the years. With prayerful reading the negative styles are being transformed into positive parenting styles, which already are bearing great results in my relationship with my children.
I highly recommend this book.

As a parent searching for direction and consistency in discipline, I found this book incredibly helpful. It is practical, easy to read, contains great examples and applications, and backs everything up with real life and scripture. I am recommending this book to all the parents I know--I wish I had read it before I had kids.

Though I'm still in the process of reading this book I'm impressed and inspired on the honesty and directness of Boundaries with Kids. This book gives an entirely different approach and reason for setting boundaries with children. It also gives a different approach and reason for adults to set boundaries with themselves. My understanding of what a personal boundary is and how to use it has given me empowerment.

This is a parenting how-to book that is free from the typical "just simply...", superficial rhetoric. It is like sitting down with two understanding psychologists and gently being given truth and hope.

This is a must read book for anyone that wants to raise not just nice children, but responsible caring individuals. It taught me how to instill responsiblity in my children and gave me the verbal responses I needed to stop nagging and still get the job done.
It has really changed the way I am raising my children today.

GREAT!!!!! I only wish that I had read this book when my children were toddlers. If children came with a book, this would be the one. As parents, our ultimate goal should be to raise responsibile independent adults. This book gives a whole new perspective on parenting. Highly recommended.

I read Boundaries first and someone gave me Boundaries with Kids. Just like the 1st Boundaries book it changed my life. I have a 5 year old and it helped me in so many area's. I give Boundaries and Boundaries with Kids to my friends and they just can't believe what they are reading. A MUST read!!

We got this to use as a study book for a church small group. It has been very practical and helpful, but the chapters sometimes seem long. However, the methods suggested are very proactive and easy to implement in any household.

This book helped me to see that implementing scripture pricipals into parenting makes life so much easier. It was encouranging and convicting at the same time. First got it from the library and then had to buy it so I could reference it over and over.

This is a well needed book in todays society. I being raised by older parents sure benifitted from it. I am listening to it over and over to get it into my making. And really all it is is common sense. KAren

Excellent practical advise. Similar philosophy to Love and Logic parenting books which I also love. I highly recommend this book for parents wanting to improve or wanting reinforcement that they are doing well.

I thoroughly liked the general adult version of "Boundaries", but did not like this book as much. Many great points throughout the book, such as how parents can and should avoid extreme anger and manipulating behavior when disciplining their children, but I feel a much better overall approach to dealing with challenging behavior in children can be found in a book called "The Explosive Child", but Dr. Ross Greene. "The Explosive Child" is great for parents of all children, but can be especially helpful for those dealing with severely challenging children. This book has changed my entire paradigm of how to relate to children. Though Dr. Greene's book is not written from a Christian viewpoint, it might as well be! It is very in line with mainstream Christian principles - more so than many books marketed as "Christian parenting" information in my opinion.

If you want to understand some assumptions behind aversion to the concept of international treaties, this book may be revealing. This mid-70's rant is mainly diatribe against foreign aid, the United Nations, and that "liberal" Henry Kissinger. Helms makes some valid observations about personal responsibility, but fails to apply those principles to his analysis of international relations. This book deserves two stars for subtle psychoanalytic value.

I haven't finished this but have found it to contain some good common sense but I wish the authors didn't feel the need to repeatedly inflict their religious beliefs on the readers. The constant references to God, Jesus and the bible are completely unnecessary and doesn't cater for those who have different beliefs. I wanted advice based on science and rational reasoning not opinion and faith. I haven't come across a single reference to any studies or actual evidence so far. Disappointing.

I purchased two copies of Boundaries With Kids & wanted the workbook to facilitate the book study with my wife. I purchased the Kindle version of the workbook and ended up with a Kindle version of the book, not the study guide. Very dissatisfied with the store over this.

This is a very valuable resource for anyone who comes in contact with kids, whether those kids are 2, 22 or older. I loved the sample conversations that are given. I actually can go to the page, find the dialogue and use it and it works!

WOW! That's all I can say about it. This book is superior to any child care book I have ever read. The ideas are clearly communicated and WORK. Everyone who is a parent should read this book, in fact, they should hand them out at the hospital when someone has a child.