Why Your Twenties Matter--And How to Make the Most of Them Now

I learned about this book after watching Meg Jay's 10 minute TED talk, i wasn't convinced then but i was curious and wanted to hear her out on the topic. Reading this book at twenty six was a huge wake up call. Even with the reference to some pretty technical psychology and medical references-- which I thought would bore me at first-- I was hooked. Meg Jay thoroughly elaborates on her thesis in each chapter regarding career, love, and even aging using relatable examples, bringing up real fears and real consequences relating to how twenties think and live, and how they should. To be honest, at first she scares the hell out of you, but then reminds you its going to okay but you have to 'decide' you'll make it today. As a twenty something I'm already referring this to others. I needed the reminder to start taking this season of life serious, and to hear some of the turn arounds her clients made at my age or older, its refreshing to know though I have some catching up to do its not too late. It is a great and timely read, especially if your twentysomething and single.

I loved reading this book. It has confirmed a lot of things that I'm always thinking about and encouraged me a lot to really get things done. Also its a great reminder that you're in charge of your own life. Highly recommended!!

Currently still reading through this book. I can say that it has already opened my eyes to a few suggestions in how to tackle my upcoming years as a recent college grad, and it also provides great motivation and strategy on how to do so.

This is an excellent pep talk for all twentysomethings, myself included. Only time will tell if this book will endure, but I felt it does for young adults what The Feminine Mystique did for women in the workplace. I was thoroughly impressed by her meticulous citations of source material, and as a medical student interested in neurology, I will go and read some of the articles she mentioned on frontal lobe maturation.

This book outlines many of the cognitive errors young people make when deciding on careers, partners, education, and the like. Many of the twentysomethings featured in the book reminded me of myself or people I know. For example, picking a barista job over a lower paying but more career-defining internship is a variation of something I did in college and regretted. Many young people I've encountered date people for significant amounts of time that they 'like but would never marry'. I've seen college classmates aimlessly switch from one major to another, losing time and money as they grow even more confused about their future. This isn't a how to book, but there is some useful advice here, including the importance of telling a good story and taking advantage of 'weak ties', or acquaintances that provide invaluable career help. There's a lot of wisdom in this book, a lot of thoughts I've had as I lent an ear to friends my age, but Jay puts it into an elegantly simple guide. I literally want to share this book with everyone I know.

As a 23 YO recently graduated student from Virginia, this book spoke to me like nothing I had ever been taught in school before. Dr. Jay uses her own experiences and others to create an insightful guide to navigating your 20's.

If you are a twentysomething, or know one, or are the parent to one, READ THIS BOOK! This was very informative and enlightening. Your twentysomethings will see themselves or parts of themselves in this book and Meg Jay does a great job in engaging her readers. It's a quick read, but a must read.

I'm 28 and related to many of the twentysomethings mentioned throughout the book... The uncertainty, the living in the present mentality... This book made my sense of urgency to get my $*** together valid. Great read and definitely worthwhile

Currently in my early 20s, I've always been worried about the future and how I'm not doing enough but this is a good motivator to get moving. I recommend this to anyone who feels confused or feels behind on what they should be doing at their age or after college :)

I am a twenty something and this book touches the questions I have always been asking. The numerous options in our world just blur our vision from the most important consideration in our life. Recommend this book to everyone in their twenties or early thirties.

It was an extremeley useful and eye-opening reading for me, even written with good humor while the message is serious. I warmly recommend it to readers in their mid-20s. (I am 26, I'm unsure whether I would want to read it at 29.)

I thoroughly appreciated the research, no-nonsense approach, and real-life case studies presented in this book. Will definitely be gifting this book to all college grads. Should be required reading for anyone trying to figure their lives out. Five stars for sure.

I barely finished the first chapter before I was so galvanized to action that I dropped the book and applied to jobs for the rest of the evening. I've recommended this book to most of my young friends. Dr. Jay delivers timely, encouraging, and straightforward wisdom.

Absolutely amazing!!! This is simply the best book I have ever read, and I thank the store Prime for shipping it to me within two days so that I didn't have to live another day without it! Every twenty-something needs this book as their bible.

20 year college student writing this review.

I thought the points/ messages were pretty basic, if you've done any sort of self improvement this book won't help you too much. it does come from a psychologist point of view, but a lot of the stories are pretty extreme, boring..

I would maybe read it again if someone gave it to me for free..

But all in all; I don't think it was very helpful, and for the price I wouldn't buy it again. Don't be deceived by the great reviews like I was

I actually genuinely enjoyed this book. I thought it would be a classic self-help book, but as a twenty-something myself, this book got me reflecting on how I would like to live my twenties (in relation to work, marriage and relationships). There are some aspects that I found to be quite cliche and too good to be true, but the overall message and tone of the book were very powerful.

When my daughter was moving out of her college apt., I saw a young man with graduation gear in hand, moving out of his apt. I congratulated him and he looked at me and said, "All my life I have worked at getting good grades, going to college and knowing that I need to graduate. Now I have done it and I am not sure what to do." As a "random" mom talking to this recent grad of a prestigious college, I smiled and told him that his accomplishment was indeed grand. I should have recommended that he read this book. It would let him know that his concerns are not only normal but necessary. This book is affirming for 20-somethings that set out with plans knowing that they may wander for a while, but the path they find ultimately will be the right path for them.

As a parent of a 20-something, this book has given me insight not only into what she will face as she traverse through these years but how it is different from my own experience. My husband works with community college students and he has had his staff read this book to give them a idea of what his students deal with as they move through this phase of life. I have recommended this book both in hard back, kindle and Audible editions to my friends who are parents of 20-somethings. I recommended that the 20-something parents have their children listen to this book on their long drives home from college. I think this book is essential reading for 20-somethings and anyone who works with them.

This was a practicle & direct discussion about how many decisions we end up making in our twenties, early thirties that affect the rest of our lives. Meg also calls out the fallacies of pop culture thinking that is not founded in reality that may trip us up, preventing us from making wise decisions. Meg covers finances, jobs, as well as relationships with others plus yourself.
This should be a required read.

The Defining Decade is a good general read. I found this book to be most useful as 'food for thought' over anything specific. The book focuses on two critical areas for people in their 20s: work and love. Usually you will find books that either focus on only work or only love -- this is what makes the book unique and more balanced.

Like many self-help books, this book is abundant in case studies that the author personally dealt with. Overall, they help illustrate and provide coverage on a wide array of topics within work and love. However, I found that some of the case studies were too difficult to resonate with because their situations were too polarizing. For example, there was a case study where a young woman that has been spending her early and mid 20s working in a cafe and practicing even though she was overqualified for the job. Her reasoning for her career choice (or lack of) was around the idea that people just explore and just 'do stuff' in their 20s. I found this hard to relate to because I am within the book's target audience, but I am in a far different situation compared to her. Of course there are plenty of examples that chime well.

This book is definitely worth the $10 and can be read within an evening (it can be skimmed in some sections without losing the book's core messages). So as a 27-yo California kid currently working in Asia, what did I learn from this book?

1) Work in your 20s will shape how you see yourself (identity capital).
2) It's important to place some priority - sooner or later - on building long-lasting relationships with the kind of people that you know you want.
3) Many people in their 20s tend to 'procrastinate' life milestones (e.g., finding jobs they like and can do for a living, marriage, children, graduate school) without doing the math.
4) You have to deal with developing your work, identity, and love in your 20s whether you like it or not.

This is a must-read for anybody in their twenties! I read it and then purchased it for my younger sister for her 21st Birthday. Great insights into why being a 20-something in this day and age can be so difficult, and how if you don't get it together during your twenties, you may have an even more difficult time later down the road.

Great book for not only the twenty-somethings, but also for parents! Both in the aspect to "see" where our 20-somethings are at with mindset, but also to see how we were at that age. Book was received in excellent condition.

Fresh out of Physician Assisstant school and I was stressed about all the responsibilities suddenly thrown at me. Another student recommended this book to me and it out a positive perspective on my life. I highly recommend it for anyone in their 20s

I really enjoyed this book. It out things into perspective and just reminded me that there are things that I can control and need to be mindful of as a I journey through life. Wish I had read it sooner (I'm 29) but loved it nonetheless!

I have been struggling with depression since I graduated from college. I picked this up not really expecting much since there are not many books that really capture the desolation you feel after several fruitless interviews. I was tired of the useless advice from friends and family who meant well but don't have a clue as to what is going on. Dr. Jay really captures the struggle recent graduates face and offers constructive advice. She is knowledgeable and straightforward. I appreciated her expert opinions and at times I found myself laughing and crying because this book really does help you reflect on your life and make positive changes. It's not a cure-all for depression obviously, but it does give you hope that things will get better. I highly recommend this for those that recently graduated and their family members. It puts things in perspective.

Great advice about not wandering too much in your twenties. I'm 28 and wishing I had started the things I'm starting now several years ago. This is sound, good advice. Meg won't validate your choices like your well-meaning friends and mentors might. Her case studies are extraordinarily relatable, and it's very powerful to see your choices reflected back at you through others who seem, at first, just like everyone you know, and who you realize a few pages later you actually don't at all wish to become. Meg forces you to consider how the choices you are making now "end," without letting you use the Scarlet O'Hara approach and worry about that tomorrow.

While I do think that it's never to late to make (most) changes you might want to make, save yourself a lot of heartache now by reading this. Not everyone needs to--those rare people who plow through life with single-minded purpose are all set, and most of the people who have identified their "passion" are probably okay as well--but for those of us who have ever wandered or felt lost, it's a godsend.

"The Defining Decade: Why your twenties matter- and how to make the most of them now," by Meg Jay, PhD is one of the few books that I would recommend to any ambitious (or wannabe ambitious), successful (or wannabe successful) twenty-something with or without a clear plan for his or her life. Meg writes in a conversational yet informed tone backed with reason and research. As an early-twenty-something myself, the sections in the book clearly address my most pressing concerns: career and love.

I want a full-life: a husband, family, perhaps a masters degree, a thriving career, and to keep up with my song writing, but Meg makes it clear that twenty-somethings often think they have all the time in the world and don't prioritize correctly and end up having to choose between which life goals they are physically able to accomplish. I was inspired to create a loose timeline of the next ten years of my life, highlighting around the time I hope to accomplish major personal or professional goals with her advice in mind.

I felt a sense of relief and empowerment after reading this book, literally better able to tackle my twenties, an invaluable read!

I was recommended this book by another twentysomething while talking about our feelings of uncertainty and confusion. I wish I had found this book sooner. The examples and advice are too relevant across the board. The writing is clear, frank, and humorous. I was truly disappointed when I reached the end. This book was just what I needed with all the advice I've been seeking.