Bite Me: A Love Story (Bloodsucking Fiends)

Simply put, i would not have CONSIDERED finishing this book if it didn't have Moore's name on the cover. Had i only known ... i wouldn't recommend this book, even as a remainder hardcover or a half-price paperback--I certainly wouldn't recommend paying the $10 both the store and B&N want for the digital version. And the physical book is a teeny little thing, not even large enough--should you have made the mistake and bought the hardcover--to use as a firestarter in a wood-burning stove. So i suppose, considering how poor it was, i should consider it a blessing it is so short.

If you are looking at this title, and haven't already read 'Lamb' or 'A Dirty Job' by Moore, please, don't buy this little turd of a book ... go with those other two titles.

So why 2 stars and not 1? It is Moore after all, and his garbage is still better than some authors' best.

I was introduced to Christopher by a friend about two years ago. I found his books witty and a light relaxing read. Bite Me is the third in a vampire series. There's no sparkling to speak of, thankfully. While he adds his own quirks to the vampire myth, he doesn't crap on it either.

The last one in this series, You Suck, seemed to crawl along but the humor I expect from Moore was lacking. Not so in the third installment. In fact, it's the one that had me laughing the most out of the three.

In You Suck, I thought the character of Abby Normal was annoying as hell. I cringed a little when I saw her little eyeliner memoirs were a focus in the book. After the fifth or sixth `Kayso, he hooked me. It worked. Her `tragic' storytelling and quips like `penis port' were classic. I mean really... I've never thought to use that! Genius! It just flowed a lot better than the last book.

The skinny of the book is that Jared, the EMO rat boy, lets out Jody from the bronze statue she and Tommy were trapped in. Abby tries and succeeds in turning herself into a vampire using vampire rat blood from her boy toy Foo Dog Steve... and grows a tail because of it. Chet the cat wrecks havoc on the homeless and ho population as a vampire cat. Yes, lots of vampire animals which in itself made me giggle. Cavuto and Rivera also make their appearance along with the Emperor of San Francisco and his trusty doggie side kicks. Let's not forget the Animals. All these characters must battle the legions of vampire cats Chet has made in his quest to fornicate and feast.

While the book was all over the place as the characters made their appearances, it didn't lose any of the impact or pace. I think if it was told in the eyes of Abby Normal the whole way through it would have gotten to the point of wanting to reach in the book and choke the life out of the character. How her journal is woven in the story gives you just enough to be aghast that there just might be a girl out there like her.

When the other vampires show up, I don`t even bat an eye when they get the superiority complex and don't call for backup. For me it's like the classic villain that tells the hero their plan before failing to kill said hero then dying themselves. Loved it.

In the end Moore wraps up all the loose ends, Abby and Tommy become human again and Jody leaves on a ship called the Raven. The same ship the fated dead vampires showed up to take care of the vampire cats. All they managed was to almost get a love poke from Chet.

As much as I like to find something wrong with a book, I have nothing save the wrap up at the end. It's almost like Moore hedged on whether to keep it open for another book. Whether that's the case or not, this book is a good high note for me.

Gay Linebacker Crunch. Need I say more?

ok....i just plain love Christopher Moore...everything he has done with the exception of Fool...which is some huge weird aberration of Awful which i don't hold against him but it was so Abysmal that i will pretend that he never wrote it and continue to read all his other books over and over again...
Bloodsucking Fiends [the first in his vampire trilogy...may there be Many More!] was the beginning of Greatness...he is just brilliant with the characters that we have learned to know and love along with their habitats and attitudes and ongoing stories...oh my goddess! the newest and latest is a Scream!...i think i read it in 3 days...could not put it down...and the Ending! i just want the sequel to be done and in my hands Now!!!
i don't want to ruin anything...but if you haven't read the first two...go do that first....but this book is flawless Christopher Moore and entrenches him in my-must-have-every-book-of-his-to-read-over-and-over-again department [Except Fool!!!!].....

A great end to the vampire "trilogy"! If you like Moore and/or his other vampire books you'll love this one. You Suck is definitely one of my favorites from him and this book is written with the same standards!

Christopher Moore is a genius. His whit and imagination are always what keeps my nose to the pages. Creative and yet his terminology makes you feel as though you are living within his stories. When a book makes you laugh out loud to yourself and read paragraphs to your friends because you want to share the humor, you know it is worth reading "Moore".

This book was not Christopher Moore's usual tour-de-force writing. It's boring and doesn't feature a lot of the trilogies main characters Tommy and Jody. I don't care a lot about Abby and Foo but apparently christopher Moore does. Do yourself a favor and skip this one. Or, do like I did and read it in a marathon to finish the trilogy. Read A Dirty Job, Fool, Lamb, or Fluke if you want a phenomenal read.

I read all three books straight and loved them. Moore's writing style is funny yet also tightly plotted. His characters are fantastic and the books are hard to put down. I would love to see more about Abby and Tommy & the other characters. I also liked seeing some of the people from "a dirty job" also. A sequel uniting all these characters would be fantastic!

I bought a couple of these books excited about the name and interested to see someone elses view on vamipires, However these books are terrible. It reads like a bad high school story. Example being .. like totally you know that she said that he said.. and I was like so tottally whatever... Seriously?? Is the Author 14?

Note: I have not read Bloodsucking Fiends or You Suck - two prequels to Bite Me, however, I feel that, for the most part, Bite Me can pass as a stand-alone book.

I grabbed Bite Me off the shelf at a used book store so I would have something less weighty than what I was currently reading while at the beach. It served it's purpose by offering some light entertainment and easy reading, but didn't do much beyond that - as expected.

Moore is clever and witty and creates fantastical and whimsical and comical stories with characters that are, at once, likeable, annoying, funny and irreverent. When Moore is on his game he is worth every penny of the cost of a new hardcover book (including tax). Unfortunately Bite Me isn't running on all cylinders.

The characters he created are charming in their own way over-the-top way, but I didn't find any of them very engaging. The one exception might be the main character, Abby Normal. She was fun and interesting and though her valley girl speak quickly became tiresome, her humor and energy gave her a certain appeal.

The biggest issue I had with the book is that not only are the characters only moderately engaging, there are so many of them. Too many superfluous people doing too many things really gives the book the feel of a sitcom with a laugh-track. Funny...haha...but little for the reader to sink his/her teeth into. I get that it's the third book in a series so maybe Moore needed to tie-up some loose ends, but that doesn't make it any more fun to read.

I've read a bunch of Christopher Moore and have enjoyed most. Unfortunately I'm kind of done with him. He's funny and clever but I no longer crave his books like I used to - maybe I'm getting old.

Christopher Moore is a gifted comic writer, able to mix the astoundingly absurd with just the dose of real world needed, all the while making readers laugh out loud at the antics of his unique characters. I have enjoyed his vampire trilogy, but found the final installment a bit wearisome at times, mainly because of the character Abby Normal, a sixteen-year-old vampire wannabe whose journal entries weigh down the otherwise fast paced story.

"Bite Me" picks up where "You Suck" left off. Tommy and Jody are imprisoned as statues, while Abby and her new boyfriend, Steve, play minions to the encapsulated undead while trying to figure out what to do with them. See Tommy and Jody were going to go their separate ways at the end of the previous book and Abby couldn't stand to see them split apart, so she bronzed them while they were unconscious. She knows that they probably won't be too happy if she were to let them out, but when Chet, the homeless guy's cat, becomes a huge vampire cat and starts turning all of San Francisco's kitties into an undead army, Abby knows that she needs some help. Jody and Tommy are released, but imprisonment has done some things to Tommy and he runs off before they can stop him. Rivera and Cavuto are still trying to fight this new wave of vampire cats while keeping mum about the whole thing, and Elijah's ancient vampire crew is back to make sure he didn't create any other vampires.

Christopher Moore has crafted a unique spin vampire sagas, allowing some much needed humor and absurdity into the mix. Readers will be wondering how on earth this story will turn out for the best, but at the same time, many will tire of Abby and the forced sounding diction that Moore uses to try to capture a weirdo teenager's thoughts. "Bite Me" is generally fun, but can get wearisome at times. I thought some loose ends were tied up too quickly, while others were given too much time.

Bite Me, the final installmant of Christopher Moore's vampire trilogy, continues a story where the previous novel ended. Unlike the first two books, much of the narration is done by teenage minion Abby Normal. Abby's teenage journal writing as a basis for story telling walks a narrow line between annoying and entertaining. Much of the problem with this book finds its root in the choice of narrator.

If you do not like cats, you are likely to enjoy reading about the sun burning them to ashes. If you do like cats, the concept of vampire cats is probably attractive to you. The plot of "Bite Me" is centered on a seemingly insignificant act from the previous book. Chet the Cat has become a vampire and he has created an army of vampire cats that are creating havoc in San Francisco. Jody and Tommy begin the novel in the bronze statue, which leaves Abby Normal to be the storyteller. Give credit to Christopher Moore for nailing the writing style of a self-loathing high school girl. Aside her writing style, readers are subjected to constant reminders of her lust to be a vampire. Jody, Tommy, and the rest of the character must stop the vampire cats before it reveals their presence to the rest of the unknowing world.

Characters returned and old jokes find a new spin in this book. I must state that this book is not as humorous as the previous two in the series, but plot is fairly compelling. Moore also draw the story to a logic and fitting end with this book.

Tre Cool vampires getting into, like,totally awkward situations...I have to say I think Christopher Moore is a severely talented linguist and seems to be really in tune with the zeitgeist of pop culture. His books are fast reads. Something refreshing to read after something intellectually intense or full of negative content.
There was a lot of overkill on the stereotypical valley girl catchphrases and slang that didn't seem natural or necessary in most situations but I guess that's the satarical kitschy edge intended.
I would've squealed with excitement had I read this in my early teens when my goth phase was at it's peak.
That said I highly recommend this for snarky brainy teen gals.
I probably won't read the trilogy but I give this book 4 stars just because I am really impressed with this author.

I have no reservations in stating that Christopher Moore is my favorite living author. He consistently writes some of the zaniest, funniest yet oddly human stories ever published. It is because of this that I was unable to put on my fanboy goggles** and blindly praise Bite Me, the conclusion to the story set forth in 1995's Bloodsucking Fiends (BSF), and subsequently resurrected in 2007's You Suck! (YS). The story arc essentially began as a comedic love story about a lonely vampire and her human minion, a bum with delusions of grandeur and an enthnically diverse group of 20-something stoners. BSF was a well thought out behemoth of a book, with a young Moore on solid footing and lettling loose. YS was a lighter tale with new characters, including a blue prostitute and an extreme caricature of a 16-year-old goth girl. It had its moments, but didn't live up to the original, save for the entertaining diary passages of said goth girl, Abby Normal. Moore nailed the jargon and these sections were the best in that novel.

Bite Me is a story that revolves almost entirely around Abby, and she is so overused in the first half of this novel that I found myself skimming through the chapters written from her point of view. These sections worked in YS because they were completely unexpected and weren't constant or nearly as long. Moore was really beating a dead horse, and by the time the meat of the story was laid out, I was already reading just to get to end to see what happened with these characters I grew fond of back with BSF. This is not the sign of a good novel, especially since I expect only greatness out of this author. I've savored nearly every passage from Moore's other works, as they usually have copious laugh out loud moments and witty non-sequiters. This was not the cause with this one, as it didn't truly feel like a real Christopher Moore book until the last 50 pages -- it really felt like a different, weaker author wrote what came before those last 50.

Bite Me was a chore to get though, and was by far his weakest storyline thus far. The ending was satisfying, but getting there wasn't enjoyable. If you're a Moore fan, have at it, and enjoy the morsels of goodness near the end (as well as the cameos from his other novels!). If you're new to Christopher Moore and want a short, satisfying read, check out Practical Demonkeeping , or start with the superior initial book in this vampire series, Bloodsucking Fiends: A Love Story .

**Admittedly, the fanboy in me did literally cheer out loud at the appearance of a character from another one of his novels; I won't spoil it here, but it was the highlight of this novel for me!

Reason for Reading: Next in the series and I read every new book Moore publishes.

Summary: The first sentence pretty much covers the plot: " The City of San Francisco is being stalked by a huge, shaved vampyre cat named Chet, and only I, Abby Normal, emergency backup mistress of the Greater Bay area night, and my manga-haired love monkey, Foo Dog, stand between the ravenous monster and a bloody massacre of the general public."

Comments: Christopher Moore manages to bring back everybody (that isn't really dead) from the previous books, adding a new character, and inserting a couple of characters from previous books for extra measure. Abby, Foo Dog and Jared have much bigger parts this time around leaving some of my favourite characters from the previous books with much lesser page time. The Animals don't even go turkey bowling once! That said the story is hugely comical with plenty of typical Moore laugh out loud moments. I love all the characters in this series and really enjoyed the Emperor and the two cops having bigger roles in this book. As to Jody and Tommy, I won't say much but I will say the ending is surprising and I didn't like it very much as someone who really cares about these characters. One thing I love about Moore's books is that he manages to reward his constant readers by bringing in past characters for cameos and this time Lily the Goth girl from A Dirty Job shows up and there is a certain white Rastaman Kona who pilots a ship who has got to be Rastaman Kona from Fluke (especially with the "Bite Me" connection). I love his character! In all, a whole lot of insane hilarity with vampyre cats, an old samurai Japanese guy, and the usual main crowd of eccentric characters. A definite read for Moore fans. If you haven't read the other books in the series I suggest you start at the beginning with Bloodsucking Fiends for the most enjoyment.

The first Christopher Moore Book I read was Bloodsucking Fiends. It is the first book in this Love Story trilogy and one of four set in and around San Francisco. I absolutely loved it. When I reached the end of book 2, You Suck, I literally wanted to throw it across the room - I hated the ending so much. This one completely redeems it beyond all expectations. The fourth book set in the Bay area is A Dirty Job, and though a great story, and deserving of a squeal, it overlaps with this trilogy with a number of characters, and places. All are worth reading. But I don't think this book should be read as a standalone.

This story continues a few months after You Suck. Abby von Normal is still running around desiring to become a vampire with her boyfriend, Stephen Fooman. But all hell breaks loose in the bay area. Vampire Cats are eating all the street people and others. Their hoard is growing and appears unstoppable. Jodi and Tommy are freed from their bronze encasement, but Tommy has lost his mind while encased in bronze and is missing. To make matters worse, a dark ship arrives in the bay with three ancient vampires who have come to clean up the mess.

Moore states on his website that he wanted to write horror books. But people kept laughing at what he wrote, so he decided to write humour. He does indeed write with a humour bent and a very skewed look at life, and in this book life through a number of different characters eyes. The book is written as a series of first person narratives. Each character telling their experience of the events, so the story jumps time to time from person or storyline. Yet it all remains a complete and fluid composite whole. When you finish reading you feel satiated, satisfied and like anyone who has eaten too much maybe a little sleepy. The book proceeds at a break neck pace, and you find yourself not wanting to put it down. Bite Me does a great job of tying up the story lines from both the first and second books in the series.

This book is witty, whimsical and somewhat sublime. Moore's humour is not for all readers, but if you like Douglad Coupland, Chuck Palahniuk or Irvine Walsh you will enjoy this humorous presentation of the other side of the coin. Moore is an excellent writer and his 11 previous books have garnered him a huge and loyal following. Anyone I have introduced to his writings has fallen in love with them. I even have a friend who is currently re-reading all of Moore's works in chronological order to experience the growth in Moore as a writer. As such, Bite Me is definitely a pinnacle in Moore's canon of literature. It is full of characters you will love and jokes you might even laugh out loud at.

(First published in Imprint 2010-05-07.)

Welcome to the crazy city of San Francisco as told by Moore. All kinds of dangers abound, (mostly) in the form of vampires. There's the Countess Jody and the Dark Lord Flood, but they're not much of a threat considering their human minion Abby Normal, emergency back-up mistress of the greater Bay Area night, wannabe vamp but settling for Goth, has bronzed them in a reproduction of Rodin's The Kiss. Then there's the Safeway night crew, but they're not really a problem unless they get in the way of Abby trying to combat all things that go bump in the night (except for her vamp friends of course). Speaking of which, the new bad boy in town is Chet, the shaved vampire cat, who is recklessly killing or turning San Francisco's street life will growing disturbingly larger. It might be more than Abby can handle, so she'll have to call in reinforcements from Steve (better known as the manga-haired love monkey Foo Dog), her gay Goth buddy Jared, and Emperor of San Francisco (protector of Alcatraz, Sausalito, and Treasure Island) and his "men," and a pretty awesome ninja guy. Then three old vampires show up, and life (and undeath) get a lot more interesting.

I would apologize for the rather lengthy summary, but I just couldn't help myself; Bite Me is just such a riot, as I've tried to convey. Moore tells this story from a wide variety of perspectives, giving the reader hilarious insight into each character's thoughts and motivations. Despite the frequently rotating points of view, often multiple times within each chapter, the story remains easy to follow and understand. There isn't really much else I can say besides that this novel is one twisted adventure of vampire and human misdeeds and sloppy solutions that manages to succeed in being both interesting and wickedly funny. I thoroughly enjoyed this laugh out loud amusing tale despite not having read its two prequels, Bloodsucking Fiends and You Suck; if anything, reading Bite Me only makes me want to read them more. Believe it or not, Moore was first recommended to me by my dad, who generally has bad if not horrendous literary taste, and this is one of the few things I'm glad I listened to him on. So, take if from my dad if not me, Bite Me is not one you'll want to miss.

This novel is marketed for the adult audience but will also be enjoyed by more mature young adult readers. Bite Me also appeals to fans of the Blue Bloods series by Melissa de la Cruz and The Secrets of the Immortal Nicholas Flamel series by Michael Scott who can enjoy a comic element to adventure.

I stumbled upon Christopher Moore's novels by chance, one day, at a local bookstore. A Dirty Job was sitting up front, under the "Staff Recommendations" section and had a funny cover that immediately caught my eye. Since that day, I've picked up a number of Moore's books and walked away happy. Bite Me, Moore's latest book in Moore's "A Love Story" series of books, follows the continuing story of Jody, Flood and their minion Abby. As in Abby Normal. Get it?

Okay, moving on...

I haven't read any of the previous stories involving these characters, but in some ways Bite Me could be read by itself. There's some character development that I found missing, but it didn't get in the way of the story. This time, we find our protagonists beset by a vampiric cat. A very large vampiric cat named Chet. And, since Jody and Flood's romance seems to be on the rocks, Abby decides to seal them up in bronze so that they'd stay together for eternity, instead of bickering. Then there's also the problem of an ancient vampire (who, I guess, is the one who initially turned Jody in the first novel, Bloodsucking Fiends) and a legion of mist-turning vampire cats, turned by Chet, the aforementioned very large vampire cat.

We're not exactly dealing with a literary masterpiece here. Having tore through a few of Moore's books (including Fool, Lamb, A Dirty Job and The Stupidest Angel), I've often found that the plots of the books are nothing special, but that Moore writes very interesting characters who find themselves in sometimes funny situations. His writing style is what keeps me reading: a conversationalist tone, filled with humor and fast-moving jokes that are sometimes hit or miss. But he keeps the plot and the writing constantly moving so that there's usually a smile plastered on your face as you wait to see what phrase or pop culture reference will be injected next.

Ultimately, I find his novels have more in common with a typical sitcom in that each are fast-moving, oftentimes funny and contains maybe one or two really laugh out loud moments. But even when things get grim or dark, you can rest assured that, by the end of the show or book, you find yourself back at the status quo.

This was my first Christopher Moore book, but it sure will not be my last! I absolutely could not stop reading, and even better could not stop laughing, at this third installment of his vampire love chronicles.

After Bloodsucking Fiends: A Love Story and You Suck: A Love Story, Goth vamp-wanna-be Abby Normal is back. A huge vampire cat is stalking her city, and Abby must fight them along with her nerdiferous boyfriend Foo and the idiot stockboys from the local Safeway. If that isn't bad enough, she previously had "accidentally" bronzed Tommy and Jody, her vampire "bosses," and they are none too happy about it when they are freed. Throw in over-the-top-gay Jared, a crazy homeless guy, and a small Japanese man in orange socks with a katana sword, and you have one hell of a story!

I had no idea where this book was going, but it was one thrilling ride. Abby's journal entries, which are alternated with the story's narrative, are hysterical, and the story itself is told with such dry humor that the surreal seems commonplace, making it that much funnier. Add in a bunch of well timed profanity (this is definitely R-rated material) and you have a book that's easy to read and entertaining as any since Johannes Cabal the Necromancer.

I've already added more Moore books to my wish list, and you will too after you pick this up. Highest possible recommendation, especially for dark humor fans.

"Bite Me" is the third novel of Christopher Moore's vampire love story (following "Bloodsucking Fiends" and "You Suck"). Despite the inclusion of a brief synopsis of the previous tales, it really would be better to first read the earlier two books. The synopsis better serves those who have read the earlier books but could use a quick refresher before continuing. Calling it a "vampire love story" may be misleading. It is neither a melodramatic romance nor a gothic horror. This is Christopher Moore, after all, and this tale is all about the humor.

Moore is funny. He is not shy with the attempts either. He does it all - snarky sarcasm, dry wit, stereotypes, translations of dog speech, low-brow, etc. He bombards the reader with relentless gags and jokes. According to the reader's tastes, some will fall flat while others will hit home. The proportion of what is successful seems to always vastly exceed what isn't.

But Moore's greatest gift is his ability to create vivid, three-dimensional, relatable, and endearing characters with an economic use of words and space. Revisiting these characters after two previous books is like a homecoming. I missed them and hope to see them again. A couple characters from two of his other novels ("A Dirty Job" and "Fluke") have cameos in this story and the feeling was the same.

The book's 300 pages go very quickly. The conflicts and resolutions breeze past. Moore does not get bogged down in anything - not even the climax. Those things are largely excuses for us to experience these characters and laugh. And it feels just right. The book is a sugary treat. Double its size and the result would be counterproductive. As with one's favorite dessert, too much is actually a negative thing. Moore has mastered this art form.

Christopher Moore. What can I say. He is one great writer! And BITE ME did not let me down. First off, this is the third book from Moore that I've read. PRACTICAL DEMON KEEPING (I'd highly recommend if you want to read about demon who is evil yet funny) and my second was FLUKE about a talking whale (anything that has a talking animal I'm a sucker for and will watch, read, etc.). I mean who does not like a talking animal or would not want to have one?

Then I looked at Moores homepage where he says BITE ME is mesh in with YOU SUCK and BLOODSUCKING FRIENDS, like a part 3. And I was worried I'd have to breeze through those two first. But the more I looked on reviews it looked like you don't have to. If you did, great, but if not you won't be left out in the open not knowing.

Now the one thing that bothered me at the start of BITE ME is the main characters language. It reminded me of 80's "Valley Girl" talk. Stuff like "Oh my gawd" and "Gag me with a spoon." Not that there's anything wrong with that, but I just was not into it. However the more you read, the more it grows on you to be just an acceptable part of the book. Again, something Moore did a great job at.

Also the part of the title BITE ME A LOVE STORY. I know that will be a turn off for some, the "Love Story" part. Some will not get past that on the cover and will not purchase the book, however they're making a big mistake. Kinda like those who will not watch a movie if "love" is in the title, no matter how good the review.

Moore does appears to do great job writing in great detail the streets of San Francisco. However my being on the East Coast and never being there, I can't say how accurate he is, but he gives a great visual picture in detail.

Moore is a really, really good writer. He did not let me down here and he provided a great read.

My first Christopher Moore book was A Dirty Job which was deliciously darkly hilarious, and I was hooked. After that I decided to check out Moore's other books and was delighted to find he had a couple series. Bite Me is the third book in the Bloodsucking Fiends series (if you haven't, make sure to read Bloodsucking Fiends and You Suck, in that order, first).

A vampire cat is stalking the city and goth girl Abby Normal launches to action. If that weren't bad enough, she must also deal with unhappy bosses which she accidentally bronzed, and (IMO) a slightly unbalanced boyfriend named Foo. Abby narrates this story and sprinkles in a few of her journal entries so we get to see another side of her. But don't go thinking she's all sunshine and light, because she's not.

What I love about Moore's writing is the sardonic wit. Unfortunately, a few of his zingers fell flat in this tale, but the book still had me laughing out loud every few pages. Also, I feel obliged to mention if you haven't read Moore, he does use coarse language, and (often far-fetched) adult situations...you've been warned.

This wasn't one of my favourite Chris Moore reads, and the ending seemed rather abrupt, but I certainly enjoyed it.

I wish I could write a creative, snappy review. I really do. Since I lack even the most rudimentary creative writing skills, I'll stick to the facts: Christopher Moore is one of the funniest, smartest Author Guys around, and I would read his flippin' grocery list if he published it. Fortunately, Bite Me is more captivating and substantial than I imagine his grocery list would be (but, Chris, if you're out there, I swear I'd still read the list).

Bite Me: A Love Story continues the tale first introduced in Bloodsucking Fiends: A Love Story and continued in You Suck: A Love Story. (Dig it, readers; note Author Guy's astounding economy with titles.) Goth babe Abigail Von Normal, Emergency Backup Mistress of the Greater Bay Area Night, is still determined that Countess Jody and Abby's dark lord, Tommy Flood, will release her from this human prison and deliver her to her rightful spot as a luscious, love goddess of the eternal night. She and her manga-haired love monkey, Foo Dog, and her rodent-loving sidekick Jared are on a mission to save the Animals, un-bronze Jody and Tommy, and save SF from Chet. Chet is now a demented, shaved vamp cat, and he's not very happy, especially as his new-found powers evolve. As he surrounds himself with hissing, spitting minions - and as the denizens of San Francisco begin to disappear into piles of oily ash - our gang of intrepid heroes (kinda) set out to save their City.

Whew. And that's only the tip of the proverbial iceberg. There are old vamps, rats, new vamps, fortune telling queens, dark corners, the Emperor and Lazarus and Bummer, rats, a Chinese artist-slash-martial arts master...did I mention rats...In other words, something for the entire family to enjoy! Abby Normal narrates a good portion of the tale via her journal/blog, and her entries are enough to split one's sides.

Bite Me is hilarious, captivating fun. It helps if you've read Moore's other novels, but, honestly? If you haven't read the first two in this series (or Fluke or A Dirty Job), you'll be fine. Author Guy takes care of his readers and provides enough back story so that new readers can play along. Now that I've read this one, I'm not so patiently waiting for the next Moore novel. Bravo!

Abby Normal: A valley girl with a brain and flair for drama. Emergency backup mistress of the Greater Bay Area. Vampire?!? Oh my. Rawr indeed.
The best part of this book in my opinion was hearing it through the voice of Abby Normal, reading her journal entries, seeing her take on things. She is probably my favorite blonde personality ever. She calls it "perky" side and despises it, it really adds a funny dimension to the book.
And wow do a lot of insane things happen in this book. Giant vampire cat, vampire mice, vampire Abby. Just when you think it cant get any crazier, it does.

If you have never read Christopher Moore before, the title of this review will puzzle you. If you have, you will simply chuckle. His particular brand of insanity is such that anything is possible, even this. Bite Me is the third book in the Blood Sucking Fiends and You Suck series. This book begins where You Suck ended and you need to have read the previous book to make sense of this one. Once again we meet the Animals, the Emperor, Rivera and Cavuto and the anything but normal Abby Normal, who (as Moore promised us in a previous afterword) is the central character of this book. And of course there are the vampire lovers Tommy and Jody. I had commented in my review of You Suck that the Tommy character had become increasingly neurotic and annoying. Moore must have realized this, because in this book he has corrected Tommy's indecisiveness and taken him out of the spotlight just in case. Instead, the over the top Abby (Countess Abigail von Normal, Emergency Back-up Mistress of the Greater Bay Area Darkness) is in her glory. Her colorful, expletive-laced narrative forms the backdrop to further vampire adventures set in San Francisco.

I thought Moore's previous book Fool was a comedic masterpiece. It is his retelling of King Lear... need I say more! You Suck is not in that class, but an enjoyable enough quick read. Instead of the predictable ending, we get an unexpected plot twist which left me wondering what exactly it means to be a vampire in Christopher Moore's world.

I have a love-hate relationship with Christopher Moore's books. I love reading them, and I stay up all night for 2-3 nights straight because I can't put them down. I look like a vampire in the morning. And then I hate when they end. Wassup with that? Granted, I haven't read all of his books, and there are some I love more than others, but this is definitely one of my favorites, which is surprising since I don't like vampires (despite how I look after reading these books). I don't watch True Blood, never got into the Twilight series, and am usually not into the whole vampire thing. So that's not why I loved this book. It's because I love to laugh, and Christopher more is so freakin' funny. This book is especially so.

I really owe it to Christopher Moore. I first discovered him when I picked up his book "A Dirty Job" in an airport. That day, my flight got delayed in Philly for about 6 hours. 6 hours! And you know what, I read his book the whole time and managed to laugh outloud and enjoy myself. In the Philly airport! Now that's good writing!

I have read a few of his books so far, and surprisingly not You Suck, or Bloodsucking Fiends, (I told you, I'm not usually into vampires) for which this book is a sequel. It didn't matter, I was able to enjoy the whole story and totally love this book without having read the other two first.

If you want to get an idea about what this book is like before you purchase it, he has two free chapters online at his website. But don't be surprised if you have to order the book online at 1am because you can't stop reading. You will be hooked I am sure. Enjoy!

Really enjoyed this one. Well written, complex plot. Moore, after two excellent books about these characters, manages to still roll out new surprizes. Excellent choice telling the story chiefly through the eyes of Abby Normal minion of the newbie Vampires Jody and Tommy.
The book opens with one of the best summary chapters ever. Abby does a super job retelling the events of the first two books without making it boring or redundant.
Moore brings back Jody (The Countess), Tommy (Her Dark Lord), Detectives Riviera and Cavuto, Abby Normal, Jerod and Foo-Dog, The Emperor of San Francisco, and the Animals. Starting exactly where "You Suck" left off we find out what happens when you leave a Science Nerd/Manga Haired Ninja and the Emergency Backup Mistress of the Greater Bay Area Night in charge.
The one weak point of the story is that it does rely heavily on the emotional development of the characters from the first two books. You definately have to have read "Blood Sucking Fiends" and "You Suck", and relatively recently to appreciate the ending of "Bite Me". In fact I would recommend re-reading the first two before launching into this one. The book definately focuses on action and suspense and leaves characterization to the first two novels. Still as part of the set of three it is entertaining, gripping, and definately rounds out the story of Jody, Tommy and their minions.

Part three in Moore's Vampire cycle, building off of "Bloodsucking Fiends" and "You Suck". If you haven't read either, the first chapter in this is a synopsis of what you've missed... told humorously enough that it doesn't seem (too) redundant if you already know the info.

Typical of Moore, this is loosely a love story with a fair amount of dark comedy. Also typical of Moore, the ending is weak and unsatisfying. Of course, I felt that about "You Suck" without realizing he was planning to return to the story for another sequel, so perhaps he intends to do that here as well.

This is not a good book to read cold if you don't know Moore. You're coming in the middle of an established story arc, so reader beware. Much of the novel is told via the journal/blog of one of the characters, a teenage goth drama queen who is both endearing and clueless. It very much has her voice and slang, and while I found it amusing, I can also see readers being put off by it.

If you liked the two previous books, you'll almost certainly like this one. If you're new to Moore, start elsewhere (and I wouldn't even recommend starting with Bloodsucking Fiends, unless you really have a penchant for vampire fiction.) This isn't his worst, but it's not his best, either.

I really like Christopher Moore's vampire trilogy series, but I think "Bite Me" is definitely the weakest of the three novels. The main character and narrator, teenager Abby Normal, is funny for the first few chapters, but she is so unbelievably annoying that she sucks all the fun out of the entire book. (If I ever hear the word "'Kayso" again, I am going to scream.) I didn't think this book was at all as funny as "Bloodsucking Fiends" or "You Suck," and I also thought the plot was kind of all over the place. (Although I did like the concept of vampire cats...until bad things started happening to them. Poor kitties!) A lot of people seem surprised by the ending, but I pretty much saw it coming since Jody and Tommy first hooked up in the first book, so no frustration on my part with that. I do think that it's time Moore abandon his vampire series once and for all and move onto bigger and better things.

Christopher Moore is twisted and hysterical. His brain is warped and oh, so magical. You will not be disappointed! I read this because I was reading vampire books... but this is so much more! I immediately bought all of his books and he happily signed them for me. Awesomesauce! (Seriously, if you ever get the chance, go to a book signing and meet the man!)

Fierce, fast, and funny, Bite Me (subtitled "A Love Story") represents the last installment in Moore's vampire series, following 1995's Bloodsucking Fiends, and 2007's You Suck (also subtitled "A Love Story"). It picks up immediately after the end of You Suck, telling the continuing story of goth chick Abby Normal, her lover Foo Dog (a.k.a. scientist Steve Wong), and the vampires Jody and Tommy, as the characters deal with the fallout from actions taken in the previous installment, among them a vampire cat named Chet, who, in addition to gathering a seemingly limitless number of feline acolytes, is also slowly becoming a human/cat/vampire hybrid. Throughout it all, Moore shows his customary humor and creativity, delivering a novel that both the living and the undead will appreciate. Although it might take some of you awhile to fully comprehend what's happening in the portions narrated by Abby, it's ultimately worth the effort.

Fierce, fast, and funny, Bite Me (subtitled "A Love Story") represents the last installment in Moore's vampire series, following 1995's Bloodsucking Fiends, and 2007's You Suck (also subtitled "A Love Story"). It picks up immediately after the end of You Suck, telling the continuing story of goth chick Abby Normal, her lover Foo Dog (a.k.a. scientist Steve Wong), and the vampires Jody and Tommy, as the characters deal with the fallout from actions taken in the previous installment, among them a vampire cat named Chet, who, in addition to gathering a seemingly limitless number of feline acolytes, is also slowly becoming a human/cat/vampire hybrid. Throughout it all, Moore shows his customary humor and creativity, delivering a novel that both the living and the undead will appreciate. Although it might take some of you awhile to fully comprehend what's happening in the portions narrated by Abby, it's ultimately worth the effort.

The only redeeming quality of this final installment in trilogy is the prevalent role of Abby Normal, the bitchy, hysterical, goth valley girl introduced in "You Suck".
In "Bite Me" San Francisco is plagued with vampire cats, yes, cats. Although there is a peppering of funny moments, the story overall is a dud. This isn't to say I've lost faith in Moore's writing. To the contrary; I've decided I'm obsessed with his sense of humor and I've already bought 4 more of his other books. However, it's obvious in "Bite Me" that Moore didn't really have much of a story to tell but was obligated to round out the series so he poops out a half assed closer that offers minimal literary stimulation. If I were to compare it to something else I'd say "Bite Me" is like finishing a colorful and sassy three course meal with a plate of sliced fruit and smelly cheese. Blah (rolling eyes and disappointed smirk).

I absolutely adore Christopher Moore and this particular series had given me so many laughs. This time, the tale is told almost entirely from Abby's perspective, and narrator Susan Bennet does a most excellent job of communicating Abby's teenage angst and goth glam. I think this will be the final installment in the series because Moore pretty much tied up all the loose ends. But knowing Moore, we'll see more of some of these characters because they inevitably bleed over into his other books. Personally, I'd like to see more of The Emperor along with his dog troops Bummer and Lazarus. I also wouldn't mind seeing more of Abby's adventures!

Rating: 3.5/5

I have mixed feelings about this book. Because it was so highly anticipated, I feel that it did not meet my expectations BUT as all other Christopher Moore books, it did have its moments of brilliance. I could not get enough of Abby Normal after "You Suck" and I was really excited to read more from her perspective but after a while I felt her whole persona was starting to become overkill. Fans of Christopher Moore will still really appreciate this follow-up but for me, it didn't live up to the previous two books. The ending wasn't the least bit satisfying which definitely took away from the book also.

Ultimately I wanted to read more about the characters' relationships rather than constant action scenes and drama. I think a more balanced mix would have made for a better read but nonetheless, it's hard to go wrong with a Christopher Moore book.

I grabbed this as an advanced reader copy because I like Christopher Moore, and usually his sense of humor and appreciation for the absurd and macabre is pretty entertaining. However, this book is the third in a series which I have not yet read, and so after getting a few pages in, I realized that I was probably wasting my time.

Thus I submit this non-review review, not as a review of the book, but as a review of Christopher Moore's work in general. Once I read the others in this series (should I ever get around to it) I shall return to write a more comprehensive review of this particular book.

For now, let me just say that Moore's work is that rare combination of dark humor and fantasy/horror that is so often handled poorly by other, lesser authors. Moore always seems to be note-perfect with his blend of the funny and the grim. His characters never have that "mary sue" quality that other authors tend to insert into humor/horror or humor/fantasy. Moore stands back and lets his characters be themselves, flaws and all. In fact, it's their flaws that make Moore's character so much more interesting than the oft-perfect characters in other authors' books.

Moore's writing flows, too. His books are fast-paced, and he doesn't go the direction of authors like Anne Rice, who overburden you with fine details in every scene. He tells you what you need to know about the action at hand, and doesn't really pound a lot of silly, made-up history or his personal mythology into you. There's nothing wrong with a little background, of course, and he does it well; But he doesn't over-do it.

If you're new to Christopher Moore, then I'd suggest this isn't the book for you merely because it is the third part of a series. You'd be better served picking up "A Dirty Job", which stands alone as a great book to get you into Moore's style.

I'm giving the book five stars for potential, and will likely edit that rating some day. From what I did read of this book, it's more of Moore as I like him, and that's good.

chris moore is, hands down, no competition, absolutely, without question, the funniest novel writer living today. i like funny books. and i've read a bunch of 'em, by a bunch of authors. there are many funny authors. but no one comes close to chris moore. the other day, my son asked me what some of my all-time favorite books were, and the first one i mentioned was moore's lamb: the gospel according to biff, christ's childhood pal. my son asked why it was on my list, and i responded that no other book is both so insightful and so drop-dead hilarious. all that said, even moore -- who in his less-than-best books is still hilarious -- can't get 5 stars on every book. he's written a couple vampire stories in a row, and i sincerely hope it's not a lazy rut, brought on by our current national obsession with all things fanged. set, again, in san francisco, but narrated by a teenage girl who is a shockingly annoying proto-goth wannabe vampire (and, for a few chapters, a shockingly annoying proto-goth actual vampire), moore invents wonderfully unique characters and re-introduces characters from previous books. he regularly introduces plot turns and turns-of-phrase that leave my head spinning with "how did he ever come up with that!?" so, not moore's most inventive work, since it follows the same basic formula and setting as his last (without actually being a sequel). but, even a not-as-inventive chris moore book is wildly more inventive and hilarious than most.

I just got done reading this novel.

Having never read any of moore's stuff before I found it very easy to get used to his language and managed to follow the story despite having not read his previous two novels concerning these characters. The start of the book gives us flash backs as to what had previously happened and it's easy to cotton onto.

I loved the characters in the novel. My favourites being Rivera, Cavuto and Okata. The two cops bring a fantastic comedic quality and Okata brings all the " awww" moments.

The only reason I give this a 4 star review is because some of the humour can be a little repetetive and sometimes just didn't bring the desired effect to what was happening.

Other than that I loved it :)

Would definitely recommend to vampire lovers and those with a sense of humour. Also it's perfect if you understand "Interweb language"

When I discovered Christopher Moore had written a third installment of Countess Jody and Lord Flood's adventures I was thrilled. It was refreshing to revisit the cast, everyone from the Animals to Foo Dog make a reappearance and let's not forget that ever growing Vampire Cat Chet!

If you aren't a fan of Miss Abby Normal, Vampire Wanna-Be then you might not be excited. She tells a lot of this story, but despite her teenage angst there are some great surprises where she is concerned, Rawr!

I was a little let down by the ending but it did ring true for all the characters. If you loved Blood Sucking Fiends and You Suck there isn't a single reason not to grab this book before it expires.

It's funny, exciting, and kept me guessing. The dialogue as always has a ring of truth for each character. I love the dog to human translations.

There are already lots of great reviews for "Bite Me", so I'll keep it short. I really liked "Bite Me". "Bite Me" is the third (and possibly final) book in Christopher Moore's very funny vampire series. I read the first two books, "Bloodsucking Fiends" and "You Suck", in the written word. I listened to "Bite Me" on audio (Recorded Books). I thought the audio production was very well done. Susan Bennett, the actress reading "Bite Me", did various voices for the different characters. At first I thought the "valley girl" voice used for Abby Normal, a main character, would be annoying, but I actually came to like it. Overall, I think the audio production was very good and definitely worth a listen.

P.S. Cat lovers reading (or listening to) "Bite Me" will probably come to suspect, as I do, that Christopher Moore is not a cat person. But that's okay. "Bite Me" is still funny, no matter what camp you are in.

If you've read anything by Christopher Moore, you already know that his wit and intelligence are matched only by his terrific observations of character. "Bite Me" does not disappoint. It's a very fast read, full of rapier dialogue and snort-worthy descriptions. Cameos abound from other Moore books (not just the vampire love story series).

Readers new to Moore may wish read "Bloodsucking Fiends" and "You Suck" first, but it's not absolutely necessary. No matter what, I defy you not to adopt some of Abby Normal's favorite phrases (most of which can't be repeated here).

In sum -- not his deepest work but definitely one of his funniest. Of course, it's probably hard to do in-depth research on the vampires of San Francisco....

Christopher Moore creates another wild, whacky, weird world for our reading enjoyment!! The characters include vampires, an enormous, shaved vampire cat, lots of vampire kitties and vampire rats. They all can turn to mist and then return to normal. Imagine mist around your legs that becomes a rat head eager to bite!! After my second dose of Moore it is becoming more and more apparent that I need to read more Moore!!

I've enjoyed Christopher Moore's novels in the past, but this one was a disappointment, the weakest entry in a weak series.

The plot is decent, though predictable. However, things seem forced in the latter third of the book, when things just happen for the sake of moving things along.

The weakest part of the series is the characters. Even spread across three novels, there are far too many characters to allow for any sort of development. Most are just a hasty assembly of quirks, rather than believable personalities.

Let's hope that Sacre Bleu is a return to form...

As a Christopher Moore worshipper it is hardly suprising that you may not get an unbiased love-gush from this reviewer. However, I gotta say...this one wasn't one of my favorite. The final in his vampire's of San Francisco triology feels more like it is written and marketed for the "young adult reader". I'm not saying it wasn't funny. True enough in many places this book is right in there hilarious enough to make you pee in your pants. But, that's just it. For me it seemed like this was a mad rush from one gag line to the next. AbbyNormal's dialogue is cute and funny, the cops as always feel very Mutt and Jeffish. And I always love the Emporer. But, well the story works itself out all too easily and then its over.

I would love to see him do a sequal to "Dirty Job" or and alternative universe sequal to "Lamb". Or maybe a whole book about the 'squirral people'.

Compared to the first two books in the series, this was the weakest.

That being said, Bite Me, was still really funny, had some great dialogue, and put sort of a cap on the story (for now?...There was a little bit of an open ending). I won't give away the plot if I can help it, but I was a little disappointed by the way things turned out in the end. I would have liked more of the loose strings to have been tied up.

The story is largely narrated by You Suck's side character, Abby Normal. And while a little of the "Abby Normal Diaries" is funny and a great way to zip through so much story, I found myself getting a little annoyed with it. I wish the story focused a little more on the "Jody and Tommy storyline", while keeping all those great side characters in play.

I'm really glad I finished this series. I think it's hard for authors who are writing a series, because not all of their readers are going to be satisfied with the endings of the characters that they feel invested in. Still, I liked this book, and it was a great series overall. I'm a big fan of Christopher Moore's books, and I'm excited to read Sacre Bleu!